


Sirius Squib

by Look_A_User_Name



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Blow Jobs, Bottom Sirius Black, Cannon whats that?, Child Abuse, Child Sirius Black, Deaged Sirius, Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Romance, F/M, First Time, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Ginny Weasley Bashing, Hand Jobs, Hurt/Comfort, Idiots in Love, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, James Potter is a Good Friend, M/M, Marauders, Marauders Era (Harry Potter), Panic Attacks, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Rape/Non-con Elements, Regulus Black is a Good Sibling, Squibs, Teen Sirius Black, Top Harry Potter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-13
Updated: 2020-09-18
Packaged: 2021-03-05 02:07:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 29
Words: 128,796
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25246603
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Look_A_User_Name/pseuds/Look_A_User_Name
Summary: In the wizarding world if a squib is born to a pureblood family they may 'Stunt' them. Stunting stops their growth completely leaving them at the age they were when the stunting began. Pureblood family's would do this to keep the world from knowing they have a squib in the family, or to use them as a servant.What if Sirius was a squib? What if he never went to Hogwarts? Will his brother and his friends ever be able to save him from the Black family house? Will he ever grow up and find someone that loves him despite his scars?This story is- Complete!
Relationships: James Potter/Lily Evans Potter, Remus Lupin/Severus Snape, Sirius Black/Harry Potter
Comments: 378
Kudos: 335





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my second work I've ever posted. I have really bad dyslexia but I do my best, thanks for understanding. I hope you like it.

Sirius Black remembered the day that Regulus did his first accidental magic, his brother was three and summoned a crayon right across the table to him. Mother and father where beyond thrilled, they had Kreacher make Regulus his favorite dinner and they had the best dessert.

“Mummy?” Sirius asked getting her attention. “When will I show my magic?”

“Soon, you’re just a late bloomer.” Wallburga Black said leaning back in her chair, face scrunched up as her husband Orion shrugged. She reached out cupping Sirius’s face. “Don’t think on it too hard pumpkin.

********

“Look at this!” Regulus said spinning, his hands glowing fun colors.

Sirius smiled leaning in to touch the colors, he looked at his little brother proud. “It’s warm! Reggie wow!”

“It’s fun. You do it.” The four year old said.

Sirius looked down at his own hands trying to focus to get the colors and light but nothing happened. He shook them out trying again, Regulus stopped his spinning watching his older brother intently.

“You can do it Siri.” Regulus cheered. Sirius bit his lip in concentration but still nothing happened. “Maybe you’re a squib?”

“I am not!” Sirius yelled shoving his brother hard to the floor. The little boy stared at him eyes watering. “Oh Reggie, don’t cry.”

“Mummy!” Regulus cried covering his face as he wailed. Quickly their parents came running. His mother reached down scooping the small boy comforting him, asking him what happened. Regulus just wailed clinging tightly to her.

“Sirius Orion Black what happened?” His father snapped.

“I-I didn’t mean it!” Sirius said fidgeting with his shirt. “He called me a squib!”

“A squib?” His father echoed. “No son of mine is a squib. Come here!”

Sirius yelped as Orion grabbed him giving him a smirk he smoothed back his hair holding him. Sirius giggled hugging the man. “I told him I wasn’t.”

“Good.” His dad said looking at him excited. “Then what?”

“I pushed him over!” Sirius said leaning back to wave his arms.

“What?” Orion said no longer excited. “You didn’t use magic on him?”

Sirius froze, he brought his arms back down disappointed. “No…”

He was promptly put on the floor. Orion crossed his arms, glaring at him. “Don’t push your brother, you aren’t a muggle. So don’t fight like one.”

His mother placed Regulus down next to him, the little boy stuck out his tongue which Sirius immediately returned. Walburga made a humming noise, “Regulus don’t tease your brother it’s unbecoming.”

“Sirius is five now. Surely he should be able to show signs of magic.” Their father said, he snapped his fingers. “I got it, my grandfather used to do this to get us kids to show off our magic.”

He grabbed Sirius around the waist bringing him upstairs. Wallburga clapped her hands, “Excellent idea. Regulus come here, you are going to want to see this. Your brother is going to do magic.”

“Yeah go Siri!” Regulus cheered as they stood at the bottom of the steps.

“Ready to do magic?” His dad asked. Sirius looked at him excited, he nodded his head eagerly. His dad shifted him swinging him back and forth facing the stairs counting down. He was thrown, he felt like he was flying. He saw the ground drop and waited for something to happen. However the ground only came closer, he waved his hands but still nothing. He closed his eyes and covered his head slamming into the ground with a sickening crunch.

“Siri! Siri!” Regulus yelled.

Sirius was screaming and crying as his mother picked him up, she moved his arm and blinding pain hit him. “No! No! It hurts!”

“It didn’t work.” His mother said stunned hefting him up into her arms as Orion joined them. “We need to go to St. Mungo’s.”

The next while was a blur to Sirius, but when he opened his eyes, Regulus was sleeping next to him on a hospital bed. He glanced up seeing his parents talking to two men.

“He fell down the stairs.” His father said. “He’s a boy. He was rough housing with his brother and took a tumble.”

“I came when I heard him screaming.” His mother added. “I don’t see why you need to be involved.”

“Well if your story checks out then there’s no problem!” A man said slamming a staff to the ground.

“Mummy?” Sirius asked scared making the adults stiffen.

“Sirius dear.” She said looking at him, she swept a hand threw his hair. “Don’t move, you broke your collarbone. The healers are fixing it.”

“I’d still like to ask him some questions. Just for the records. Moody can you see Mr. and Mrs. Black out.” The second man said walking closer, Sirius pushed back into the bed nervously.

“With delight.” Moody said herding out

“Mummy?” He asked.

“Don’t worry baby.” She called before the door was shut. “Just tell them how you _fell_ down the stairs.”

“Don’t be afraid. My names Fleamont Potter, I have a little boy about your age. I’m an Auror. Do you know what that is?” He asked sitting in a chair by the bed.

Sirius nodded, “Yes! I wanna be an auror someday!”

“Oh then you better study hard.” Mr. Potter said with a laugh.

“Reggie! Reggie wake up. It’s an auror!” Sirius said trying to wake Regulus up one handed.

“An error?” Regulus asked groggily.

“No! An auror.” Sirius said looking back at the man, Regulus eyes widened seeing the stranger, he pushed himself behind Sirius giving a small wave.

“Sirius.” Mr. Potter said, “How did you get hurt?”

Sirius paused, his mummy had told him to say he fell. He looked at Regulus who was cowering eyes closed behind him then to the man with the kind smile. “Am I in trouble?”

“No, of course not.” He said gently. “It’s just not every day you see a child with… such a bad break.”

“Oh…” Sirius looked at his arm in the sling. “I was playing with Reggie, when I fell down the stairs.”

********

When Sirius was called into the room his mother gave him a potion. “Drink this, it will help with your problem.”

“You mean my magic?” Sirius asked excitedly.

“Yes.” She said flatly watching him drink the bitter potion. “You will take one of those once a week until your magic forms.”

“Ok mummy!” He said happily, he put the empty vile down and ran to Regulus’s room. He slammed open the door, “Reggie, Reggie, guess what?”

“What?” The younger boy asked concentrating on the dragon he was flying around the room.

“Moummy gave me a potion, it’s going to make me get my magic!” Sirius said.

“Yes! Then we can fly broom together.” Regulus said accidentally letting the dragon drop. “Maybe it’s already working! Wanna go see?”

Sirius flinched back, the memory of the stairs returning. Regulus seemed to sense something was wrong, since he just stared at him. “I- I don’t want to fall again.”

“Oh…” Regulus said sadly. After a moment his eyes lit up he grabbed the toy dragon. “Let’s play dragon then, while we wait.”

********

Sirius lifted his sleeve looking at the angry red mark on his arm, tears in his eyes. Father had hexed him, it was a stinging hex and true to the name it stung. He rubbed his face in his sleeve. He hadn’t done anything. Or at least he didn’t think he did. Father said he had been bad lately and so did mummy. They were always telling him he was bad. He’d been yelled at before but never had they raised a wand to him.

He cuddled deeper into his bed, trying to cry silently when Regulus walked in, Sirius stared up at him. When did he get so tall? Regulus sat next to him inspecting the mark, the six year old leaned down giving it a kiss. “Does it feel better?”

“A little.” Sirius lied, he hugged his knees, “How come I have to clean my toys but Kreacher cleans up yours. It’s not fair!”

“Maybe because you can’t do magic yet.” Regulus said pushing him lightly.

“I’m not a squib!” Sirius glared at him furiously slapping Regulus. He looked at his younger brother in shock, as a red mark formed on his face. Dark eyes turned to him watering. Sirius was going to apologize when his brother stood leaving the room without a word.

Fear gripped Sirius’s chest, now he had been really bad. He jumped off his bed and ran for the closet, he shut the door hiding in the deepest corner. He covered his head with a blanket and waited. A few minutes later his door was thrown open.

“Sirius where are you?” His father’s voice thundered, Sirius cowered deeper. He heard things slamming around before the door opened. His father yanked the blanket off pulling his hair with it, making him yell. Orion hauled him out tightly by the back of his shirt. “Do not hit your brother! He’s better then you!”

“I’m sorry!” Sirius cried as he was dropped on the floor.

His dad stood back wand in hand, “This is how you hurt someone.”

*********

Regulus was eight when he started to notice something was wrong. Sirius used to be taller than him but now he was much shorter, and still looked the same as he did when he was five. Regulus tapped his chin watching his brother huddle inwards as they walked around Knockturn Alley following their mother.

“Keep up you two.” Wallburga said glancing back, “Regulus hold his hand, we don’t need him to get lost.”

Regulus reached back taking Sirius’s hand, pulling him along. “Mum, where are we going?”

“Just to get his potion dear. We are running low. Keep him close, I don’t want him to break anything.” She said shooing the boys into the store. Regulus brought Sirius over to a little display case where they watched the potions spin slowly. Their mother walked straight to the counter. Regulus pretended to be interested in what he was looking at but he listened to his mother instead. She called to the shop keeper, “John Barrick pleasure to see you.”

“Wallburga, welcome back. I see the potion is working well.” The man at the counter said, Regulus saw his reflection give a pointed look at Sirius. He carefully pulled his brother in tighter.

“Hmp. How long until it’s permanent?” She asked tapping her nails on the counter. “It’s been three years.”

“Stunting takes a long time and it’s never truly permanent just harder to break, my dear.” The man said. “Is he still taking it once a week?”

“Reggie?” Sirius whispered, making him miss his mother’s response. The little boy was pointing at a swirling green potion. “It’s so pretty.”

Regulus smiled nodding listening to the man talk. “In that case we can start weaning him. Once he turns eleven it will be as permanent as it can get.”

“About time, he’ll be ten in a few months.” She said. Ten? Regulus looked at Sirius. No that wasn’t possible, he was so small and young. “Stunting really is the only way to deal with squibs. I trust this amount will keep you quiet.”

“As silent as a mouse.” The man said smiling in a way that made Regulus’s skin crawl.

Their mother pocketed her bag of potions and headed for the door. “Boys, let’s go.”

They scampered after her, Regulus still holding Sirius’s hand. He looked down at the shorter boy as his big onyx eyes spotted a candy store sign. Sirius turned, “Mummy can we get some candy?”

She turned looking at him with disdain. Regulus cleared his throat quickly, “Please mum, please?”

She huffed but her expression softened, she pulled out three galions handing them to Regulus. “Not too much. When you’re done I’ll be across the street in the bookstore. Don’t make me wait too long.”

“Thanks mum.” Regulus said allowing Sirius to pull him into the shop.

“Reggie, I wanna get chocolate frogs!” Sirius said trying to free his hand, but Regulus held it tight following him. “Let me go, I’m fine on my own.”

“I’m just watching out for you.” Regulus said.

“I’m the big brother Reggie.” Sirius said rolling his eyes. Regulus froze, did he not know? Didn’t he notice? “Mom only gives you the money because I don’t have magic yet. Chocolate frogs!”

He reached up grabbing a handful, Regulus grabbed his fair share, they walked around the store grabbing random candies before leaving. Regulus held one bag while Sirius held another. They found their mother quickly and side along apparated home.

That night after dinner Sirius fled to his room while Regulus carefully waited in the living room reading. His parents had their after dinner bottle of wine and soon his father was buzzed. He waited patiently as his mother disappeared upstairs that’s when Regulus looked up.

“Father?” He asked feigning boredom. “Why isn’t Sirius growing?”

His father snorted, “That sometimes happens to squibs.”

Regulus nodded, “I thought he was on a potion to help him get his magic.”

“There’s no such thing.” His dad laughed, “He’s better off this way.”

“Is that what the potion’s doing then you’re stunting his growth? Is that why it’s called stunting?” Regulus asked, turning back to his book as if it was interesting. 

“Who told you that?” He stammered drunkenly his glass tipping with the motion. “Did he tell you?”

“No.” Regulus said blankly.

“That stupid little squib!” Orion roared standing he started for the door when Regulus sprung from his seat rushing to block him. “Get out of the way!”

“Sirius didn’t say anything! I don’t think he knows!” Regulus defended, his father turned his wand on him. “Father please.”

“Crucio.” He said. Regulus felt his eyes roll back, the pain was so intense. He slipped down to his knees when it stopped. He gasped on the floor, panting as his dad walked up the steps. “Hey Sirius! Daddy wants a word with you!”

Regulus scrambled to his feet, and half ran half crawled up the stairs as screaming started. He was blocked at the top as his mother grabbed his shirt. “Mum! Sirius didn’t do anything it was me!”

She ignored his pleas, shoving him in his room, she slammed the door locking it. “You’re supposed to be the good son!”

“Mum! Mum let me out! Sirius!” He screamed banging on the door.

The next day when he was let out he pushed past Kreacher and ran to his brother’s room. It was a mess, he stepped over the charred remains of chocolate frogs and threw the door open to the closet, making the small boy inside jump. Regulus bent down pulling him in delicately for a hug. Sirius didn’t hug him back he just knelt there crying, body shaking. This was the moment Regulus knew he would do anything and everything in his power to protect him.


	2. Chapter 2

Sirius didn’t say anything, he ran around the kitchen helping Kreacher clean, as the elf hissed and insulted him. “Dirty squib, disappointing Mistress and the Master.”

Sirius ignored him biting his tongue as the insults continued. He climbed up his little step stool doing dishes when the door opened. “Kreacher knock it off!”

“Reggie.” Sirius sighed relieved, he was picked up and spun around. Regulus placing him on the counter, his brother grabbed a cloth cleaning his face. “Stop it!”

“You are a mess.” Regulus said, “Come on. I need to get to school aren’t you going to see me off.”

Sirius’s eyes went down. “Squibs shouldn’t go to the platform…”

“I asked mother. She said it was fine for today.” Regulus said, Sirius looked up eyes shining.

“Really you mean it? But what about the chores?”

“Sirius, it’s a special occasion.” Regulus said pulling him onto his hip, “And Kreacher can do all the chores for you. _Right_ Kreacher?”

“Of course young master Regulus.” The elf grumbled bowing.

“Regulus are you ready?” Their mother screamed making Sirius flinch.

“Yes mum.” Regulus called back, walking to join her by the floo as Sirius clung on.

“Regulus, I told you, you must not talk of Sirius, he’s a disgrace.” She snapped, Sirius leaned into Regulus.

“I want him to come see me off.” Regulus defended.

Sirius looked at his mother he bit his lip before swallowing. “Please mummy? I won’t talk to anyone.”

She breathed hard before nodding her head, yes. Sirius smiled clinging to Regulus as he was taken through the floo. He only coughed a little as they landed, the platform was enormous with tons of children, and parents everywhere. He struggled to be put down, which Regulus obliged.

“Wow, Reggie this is great. I- I wish I could join you.” Sirius said.

“I’d take you in a heartbeat big brother.” Regulus said turning to help their mother. Sirius smiled, Regulus was the only one who would acknowledge that he was older. His parents had long started referring to him as the little brother. He walked a few paces away turning once in a while to make sure he could still see his brother, he just wanted to see the train. He was bumped from behind as someone ran forward.

“Sorry!” An older boy said grabbing him to keep him from falling. Sirius turned around seeing round glasses and messy dark brown hair. He looked around the other boy for Regulus but he was missing. Panic must have shown on his face as the other boy looked at him. “Oh no. Did you lose your mummy and daddy?”

He promised he wouldn’t speak so he just nodded, looking around the crowded platform. The boy nodded sadly. “It’s ok. I’ll help you. My name’s James Potter what’s yours?” Sirius pursed his lips, eyes widening. “Oh wow puppy dog eyes much. Its ok little pup. Come on, I’ll take you to a prefect.”

He held out his hand and waited, Sirius took it slowly, allowing the other boy to lead him to a tall red-headed man. “Potter, hurry up and get on the train.”

“Weasley, this kids lost.” James said glancing down. “This is Arthur, he’s a prefect.”

The red heads eyes widened looking downward, he kneeled down. “Hello, little guy, what’s your name?”

Sirius stepped back, ducking behind James. “He doesn’t talk.”

“Not a problem, I’m sure someone’s looking for you.” Arthur said smiling as he carefully reached out. “Come with me and we’ll settle this up lickety split.”

“There you are!” Regulus yelled practically shoving Arthur out of the way. “Merlin, don’t do that.”

Sirius ran up wrapping his arms around him. “I’m sorry, I wanted to see the train.”

“That’s fine, just wait next time.” Regulus said offering to lift him, Sirius refused looking at James curiously. Regulus followed his gaze. “Umm… Thanks for finding him.”

“Don’t worry about.” James said rubbing the back of his head. “Oh, you’re a first year. I’m a second year, do you want to sit with my friends and me on the train?”

“Oh… Maybe, I’m supposed to find my cousins.” Regulus said, taking Sirius’s hand. Sirius tried to pull away immediately. Regulus looked at him hissing. “Stop that. I have to drop him off. See you around.”

Sirius felt is arm get tugged, he waved bye to the other boy as Regulus dragged him towards their mother. She scowled at him, Sirius looked down. “I see you found him. Should have left him at home.”

“He was just looking at the train.” Regulus snapped. He turned looking at Sirius, holding his shoulders. “I’ll write you as much as I can. You write to me too ok?” He glanced at their mother but she was busy he immediately started to whisper. “Who was that other boy, you seemed upset.”

“James Potter, he’s my age…” He said looking down.

“Oh.” Regulus said in understanding. “Its fine, you’ll be fine. Sirius listen to me very carefully. I’m not going to be home, not till Christmas. I need you to be more than good. I need you to be perfect. Can you do that for me?”

“Yes!” Sirius said making little fists determined.

Regulus nodded. “Ok, bye I love you. Mum, see you at Christmas.”

“Oh Regulus,” She pulled him in for a bone crushing hug. “Write to me.”

Sirius waved watching his brother disappear into the crowd. He waved when the train pulled away as his heart dropped to his stomach. He was alone now. He looked at his mum, but she simply snatched his upper arm hauling him to the next open apparition spot. With a sickening twist he was back outside Grimmauld Place. She dragged him inside and to his father in his reclining chair.

“Regulus is gone.” She said, making Orion look up, she roughly shoved Sirius down. “With him gone there will be some changes around here. I don’t want to see your face unless necessary, I don’t want to hear from you either, Squib. So no more ‘mummy’ if you need something its Madam. But you are now Kreacher’s problem. I only have one son and he’s at school. Understand?”

“Yes mum- Madam.” Sirius said.

“Good. You are not going to tell Regulus this. If you do, you will be punished.” She said sternly, she turned her wand casting a cutting jinx. Sirius gasped, grabbing his arm. “You will do everything I say. Squibs can’t say ‘no’ understand?”

“Yes Madam.” Sirius said through tears, he glanced up at his father.

“Good,” The man said, leaning back. “Nobody wants a squib for a child. Now get out.”

“Yes father.” Sirius said only to be stung.

“It’s yes Sir.” Orion snapped. “And another thing, when we have guests over you will either stay out of the way or you will entertain them. Squibs are to be seen not heard.”

“Yes Sir.” Sirius said backing out of the room. The second he was out he ran silently crying all the way to his room, he went in and immediately climbed under the covers terrified.

********

The next morning he was woken up early by Kreacher and forced to clean the stairs, he cowered when his mum walked by unsure if he should keep sweeping or get out of her way. She simply walked past him, shoving him slightly as she did. He sighed in relief and kept cleaning.

“Squib?” She called, making him jump. “Come here. Regulus wrote to you and expects an answer.”

He ran into the room as she handed him a letter, as she sipped her tea. He started to climb up on a chair when she grabbed his head shoving him down. He stood there awkwardly before moving a little ways away. He opened his letter and stared at it.

“Madam?” He asked, making her sigh as she looked up waiting for him to continue. “I can’t read.”

She rolled her eyes holding out her hand for the paper. He gave it to her excited. “Dear Sirius. I’ve been sorted into Slytherin. Yadda yadda yadda.” She said not even reading parts, Sirius felt his excitement drain, turning into stress. She pulled out a quill and parchment. “I’m going to write him back, saying you’re happy for him. Now get out of my sight.”

“But Madam, my letter.” Sirius said reaching for his brother’s letter. She grabbed his wrist spinning him around she pulled down his pants delivering a strong stinging hex to his bottom. Sirius teared up throwing his free hand back to protect himself.

“Still want to argue with me over a letter?”

“No Madam.” Sirius cried as she tightened her grip painfully around his wrist. “I’m sorry.”

“Squibs can’t say no or argue with witches and wizards. Now, go be useful somewhere.” She said pushing him away. He pulled up his pants and fled the room, he scurried back upstairs to the broom and continued cleaning.

It was late in the day and Sirius was polishing the doorknobs when the sound of the floo flared. His father walked through clicking his teeth, Sirius felt a cold sweat forming as the man stalked up behind him inspecting his work.

“Stop cleaning.” He demanded, he grabbed Sirius’s shoulder hard enough to bruise as he spun him forcing the small boy to look at him. “Go to your room and don’t come out for the rest night. No exceptions.”

Sirius pulled away and slipped into his room quickly, shutting the door. A second later he heard it lock. He scrambled across the floor and got into his bed exhausted. He tried to lay on his back but his bottom still hurt, defeated he laid on his side in the dark. He poked at the sheets on his bed feeling the hole made by one of his father’s wayward curses. He closed his eyes it would be alright, Regulus would be back at Christmas.

********

He wasn’t allowed outside anymore, every day he had some new form of cleaning, Kreacher would insult him and his parents mostly ignored him. His mother would order him around but his father had taken to locking him in his room the second he got home. He was currently sitting on the floor of the kitchen eating a small dinner since Squibs don’t belong at the table when his father walked in early.

“Go to your room.” He said flatly. Sirius jumped up sadly abandoning the rest of his toast as he and his father went up the stairs. He tried to detour to the bathroom when he was grabbed by the hair. “I said go to your room.”

“I will but I have to pee.” Sirius said wiggling his legs.

“Are you arguing with me?” Sirius shook his head hands scrapping against his father’s hold. Orion scoffed forcing him into the bedroom. “Hold it. And you better not make a mess in here.”

The door was a slammed and locked. Sirius looked around desperately, before moving to squirm and sit on his bed. He wiggled a little looking at his trash can, would that count as making a mess? It probably would. He decided to just try to sleep, and maybe with luck he could sleep through it.

He couldn’t, he woke up after a few hours, in pain. He climbed out of bed and went to the door holding himself but it was still locked. He scanned the room seeing the window, he squeezed his legs together trying to pry it open but it was too heavy. He was getting desperate. His eyes landed on the trash can, it was his best hope. He waddled towards it when he felt relief, then wetness.

“No…” He murmured in the dark. This wasn’t fair, he was supposed to be twelve and in Hogwarts. Not five and peeing himself. He ignored he tears and he stripped using his clothes to mop the floor in the dark. He laid down shoving them deep under the bed, maybe nobody would notice. He grabbed some new pajamas and climbed into bed crying.

********

Regulus was thrilled, it was the day before Christmas break and he just wanted to go home to see Sirius he was so worried about him. He was eating breakfast when an owl swooped down offering it leg with a letter on it. He grabbed it quickly offering the bird a bit of sausage. He opened the letter and felt his heart sink. His parents were going away for Christmas, they were going on Holiday and Sirius was going to a sitter. He wasn’t to come home. He incindeoed the letter and stalked from the great hall.

He marched down stopping by the lake where he held back his tears of frustration. Who would be watching Sirius, some random sitter? He hated that, he hated everything. He sunk down, bringing his knees to his chest he wouldn’t cry.

“Hey are you alright?” He jumped seeing an older boy with long black hair and a redheaded girl approach him. She looked at him sadly, “Are you ok?”

“Yeah, it’s nothing. I just really wanted to go home but my parents are going away.” He said as they sat with him. He looked at her, Gryffindor but the boy had Slytherin’s crest. “Umm… Hi, I’m Regulus Black.”

“I’m Lily Evens and this is my best friend Severus Snape.” She said smiling.

“I’ve never heard of a Snape or Evens.” He said.

Snape snorted, “That’s because she’s muggleborn and I’m a half blood.” He looked at Evens, “Black’s are well known, for being purebloods with perfect lineage.”

Regulus winced at that. “I don’t believe in that blood purity stuff.” He said, how could he, blood purity was trying to scratch his brother out of his life.

“My mistake.” Snape said, getting elbowed by Evens he added. “Sorry.”

“It’s not a mistake. My stupid parents believe it.” He hissed, “I’m just worried about… Someone.”

“Yeah, I get that.” Snape said pulling his legs up as Evens rubbed his shoulder. “I worry about my mom when I’m not around. My dad isn’t a great guy.”

“Exactly,” Regulus said looking him in the eye.

“So you’re upset because you can’t go and protect them?” Snape asked.

“Merlin Snape are you a mind reader?” Regulus asked getting a sheepish smile from the boy.

“That’s what Remus says too.” Snape said, “Look Lily’s going home, but Remus and I’ll be here if you want company. And you can call me Severus.”

“Thanks. I might take you up on that.”

*********

“Dear Sirius,” His mother began, straightening the letter. “I’m sorry to inform you but I won’t be coming home for Christmas. I’ve made friends and will be staying at the school. Regulus.”

Sirius started at her around his black eye. “What? But Reggie promised.”

“Guess he has better things to do then hang out with a squib. In any case, Orion and I will now be planning a holiday trip for us.” She paused, looking at him. “I guess we’ll find you a sitter.”

“But Madam, I’m twelve.” He said, she reached down quickly pinching his cheek purposely bruising it.

“No arguing. You are a five year old stunted squib that wets himself.” She said finishing her pinch with a slap making him jump. “Go pack and come back down as fast as you can.”

Sirius was nearly tripping over himself as he carried his little bag into the room, his mother was in. She looked at him before walked to the floo sticking her head in, after a moment a man came out, with a narrow face, and a nasty look in his eyes. “Thank you for coming, John. Squib this is Mr. Barrick.”

“My, my,” The man said walking up to Sirius, he walked around him slowly looking him up and down. “That potion worked wonders. Perfect little child.”

“Yes,” Wallburga said, nodding. “We’ll be back in a week, he’s your until then.”

“I will take great care with him.” Barrick said taking the bag from him. He reached out and Sirius stepped back uncomfortable, he felt a shock to the behind, he stumbled forward. He was quickly grabbed and hoisted into the man’s arms.

“No, please put me down. I’m not a baby!” Sirius whined pushing away from the man.

“Sirius, squibs can’t say no.” The man said booping his nose. He brought him through the floo, where they landed inside a potions shop. He recognized this place, mother had taken him and Regulus here.

“I live upstairs.” The man said carrying him up the back. Sirius felt a pit in his stomach as they enter the apartment, it looked normal and nice but it felt wrong. He was swung around and brought about on a small tour finally stopping at a small room with a bed. “This will be your room.”

Sirius again tried to get down, but instead the man only put his bag down. He tightened his grip, bringing him around again, this time downstairs, to the shop. He brought him around there before going to a final room. He opened the door and flicked on a light as the basement stairs lit up. Sirius really didn’t want to go down there. He struggled bucking, he felt the man struggling to keep him in his grasp. Finally his feet touched the floor, he tried to run, but the man still had a good grip on his shirt. He yanked him towards him, then past him shoving him towards the stairs.

“Two choices little one, I can carry you down or I can throw you down.” He said holding his upper arm digging his nails in. “Just say it.”

Sirius swallowed hard, pride almost wanted to let the man throw him down however reluctantly he stopped struggling. When nothing happened he looked at the man as he mouthed ‘say it’. Sirius sighed embarrassed and defeated. “Please carry me.”

“Of course little one.” The man said scooping him up, patting his head. “Why not rest your head on my shoulder, you must be tired.”

Sirius laid his head down upset, he didn’t want to be treated like a baby only Regulus could treat him like a baby. They descended the stairs revealing a well-stocked potions lab. The man chuckled holding Sirius’s head down when he tried to look around.

“Patience little one. There will be plenty of time to look around.” He carried him back upstairs and too the couch. He sat keeping Sirius on his lap, when he tried to move he was pulled back. “How old are you?”

“Ummm…” He looked down unsure how to answer.

“Oh I know physically you’re five but I meant your real age.” He asked taking his hands and bouncing his knees making Sirius bounce with them.

“I’m twelve.” Sirius said, as the man chuckled, making car noises like him bouncing along was some game.

“I did such a good job. You’d never even know. Well don’t worry we will have lots of fun.” He said before continuing the bouncing car noises and making Sirius’s hands ‘steer’.

Hours later Sirius was relieved when the man finally told him to get ready for bed. He ran to the bathroom and tried to shut the door when it was grabbed and pushed open. “Come on I’ll draw you a bath.”

Sirius sat on the closed toilet watching him fill the water and check the temperature. Sirius waited for the man to leave but he didn’t. His stomach twisted in knots, this was wrong. Only Regulus bathed him and sometimes Kreacher. He felt his shirt getting removed, and tears perked his eyes.

“Why are you crying?” He asked, pulling him to stand fingers tucking into his pants. “You’re too little to bathe on your own. Wallburga told me as much.”

“I’m not crying.” Sirius declared, stomping his foot. The man only chuckled, removing the rest of his clothes in one motion. He quickly dropped him in the bath, and started trying to wash him. “I can wash myself!”

“Stop it, you are a feisty little thing.” He said as Sirius pulled away splashing him. The man pulled out his wand touching it to the water, quickly the temperature rose till Sirius was screaming trying to get out. “Tomorrow, you will let me give you a proper bath.”

Sirius nodded his agreement through tears as he was dressed and carried again. He mildly looked around as he was carried to the basement. He tightened his grip scared but was forced to sit on the table.

“You are more trouble then you are worth.” Barrick said, glaring at him as he placed hands on either side of Sirius pinning him in. “I only agreed to watch you so I could use you. I have dreamed on experimenting with squib blood and such in my potions but alas it’s frowned upon. But Walburga is such a kind woman, so you and I are going to have lots of fun.”

When Orion arrived to collect him a week later Sirius fled to him. He was pale, malnourished, and covered with bruises, cuts and burns. Sirius fell at his feet, and begged to go home. Orion ignored him, shaking Barrick’s hand and exchanging money.

“He was good?” He asked.

Barrick smiled, “He was a delight. I’d love to have him again.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> James naturally draw to Sirius. A little young Arthur Weasley. And of course the dynamic duo Severus and Lily. Sorry Remus only a shout out.


	3. Chapter 3

Nothing really got better for Sirius but he was really excited Regulus would be coming home soon. Magically all the beatings had stopped a few days before today. Walburga turned his face this way and that checking for holes in his glamor, he tried not to wince as she pressed down on a bruise on his temple.

“Listen to me and listen well. You had a wonderful time while he was gone. And nothing is different now that he’s back. Understand?”

“Yes Madam.” He said.

She gave his hair a tug. “Call me mummy, and your father, father or daddy.”

“Yes Ma-mummy.”

“There he is!” She said standing ready to hug Regulus but instead Sirius was picked up and hugged tightly. Sirius tried not to show how badly it hurt his ribs getting squeezed like that. “Regulus, what about me?”

“Oh, hello mum.” Regulus said hugging her bringing Sirius with him.

They flooed back and Regulus told them all about what he learned and his house all while trying to hold Sirius. Sirius struggled away, being held so tightly made him think of Mr. Barrick. Regulus let him go but snatched his hand instead.

“Come on, come help me unpack.” Regulus said pulling him along behind him. Once they were in Regulus’s room the taller boy threw his bag on the bed. He reached to grab Sirius but he maneuvered away, climbing up on his own. “Oh Sirius I wish you could be there I made so many great friends but you can’t tell mum.”

“Why?” Sirius asked, pulling out a shirt.

“Mom wouldn’t like them. She’d call them blood traitors, and mudbloods.”

“Mudbloods?”

“Don’t say that, it’s a bad word.” Regulus whispered, Sirius crossed his arms annoyed. “Sorry. I’m going to write to them this summer, hopefully you can meet them. Hey this summer, I’m going to teach you to read and write. No more mum doing it for you.”

“Yes, please.” Sirius said collapsing his hands together. “Who are your friends?”

Regulus smiled guiltily. “They’re all older than me. They’re your age. There’s Severus Snape, Lily Evens, Remus Lupin, and I’m becoming really good mates with that guy that saved you at the train station James Potter. There’s also some guy named Peter Pettigrew but I’m not close to him. It’s funny I thought Severus and James hated each other, but they actually just have this massive prank war. Though it can get a little vicious.”

Sirius looked down, “That sounds nice.”

“Oh, Sirius I’m sorry.” Regulus said, pulling him in for a hug. “Don’t worry all summer it will be the two of us.”

His first night back Sirius was so afraid Regulus would up and leave him that he spent the night in his room. Which worked out well with him there, he didn’t have nightmares. He also wasn’t locked in the room, so he didn’t have any more accidents.

It was paradise having his brother back, his parents left him alone for the most part. He got to sit at the table during meals. He was allowed to sleep in and Regulus would play with him. Regulus was a good brother and true to his word, taught him to read so much so that when an owl showed up with a letter he handed it to Sirius.

“What’s it say?” Regulus asked as they ate breakfast alone together.

“Dear Regulus, I’d like to invite you over for a guy’s only sleep-o-ver. Sleepover. At my house the Potter Man-or. James Potter.” Sirius said handing him the letter to read over, while he stared down dejectedly.

“A sleepover.” Regulus said excited. Though he caught his brother’s eye and swallowed hard ripping the letter up. “That sounds boring.”

“You don’t want to go?” Sirius asked, looking at him. “I’d go. It sounds fun.”

“What? But then I’d miss time with you. I see them plenty.”

“Thanks Reggie.”

********

When Regulus’s Hogwarts letter came Sirius wasn’t ready. He was so scared, of what would happen, how bad things would go back to once he left. He followed along watching the cobble stones as Regulus, lead him from store to store. Once he left, mummy wouldn’t let him out of the house again he just knew it.

“Hey Regulus!” His brother’s head flew up as a group approached him.

“Who’s that?” Walburga asked narrowing her eyes at the boys.

“Just some classmates.” Regulus said picking up Sirius, “I’m going to say hi, while you get a coffee or something.”

“Leave Sirius.” She said but Regulus pointedly ignored her, walking up to the group.

“Aww.” James cooed, “It’s the little puppy eyes from the train station.”

“Regulus, you have a baby brother?” A girl asked, reaching out to pinch Sirius’s check. His eyes widened in alarm, he shoved his face into Regulus’s shoulder holding tight terrified.

“Sirius you ok?” He asked, shifting him out of his shoulder. “You can talk you know. These are my friends, you remember James, and that’s Remus, Peter, Lily and Severus.”

“Hello, nice to meet you.” He said looking down.

“Oh he’s so polite.” Remus said. “How old are you?”

Sirius looked at Regulus panicked, Regulus put him down. “Five going on thirteen.”

James crouched down to his level, “Hey remember me from when you got lost on at the train station?”

Sirius crossed his arms, “I wasn’t lost. I just couldn’t find Reggie.”

“That’s what lost means.” Severus whispered making Remus laugh.

“Aww, Reggie, I love your little puppy brother.” James said, “He’s got a little attitude like you.”

“Ugh.” Regulus said slapping a hand to his face as James waddled around on the floor trying to pick Sirius up. “Come on James you’re freaking him out.”

“Fine, fine.” He said standing. “Wait is this why you missed my sleepover? Dude just bring him if you have to babysit.”

“I don’t babysit.” Regulus said crossing his arms.

“Whatever you and Severus better not miss my next one. This little guy is more than welcome” James said reaching down to rub Sirius’s hair.

“Alright, next time I’ll bring him.” Regulus said. “I can’t wait to get back to school I miss you guys.”

Sirius’s eyes widened, he missed them. Of course he missed them. They were magical and did fun stuff together he was just a loser squib. He felt his face crumble as they talked. He pressed into Regulus’s leg willing him to see him but he was too distracted. He looked up at them all chatting so happy. He gave up and leaned on Regulus watching the rest of the people in Diagon Alley walk by. He supposed this was a sign that even his own brother would stop caring one day.

**********

Sirius wasn’t ashamed to admit he cried when Regulus left. Truth was he was terrified what would happen when he did. Walburga kept him snug in her arms as he wailed and reached for Regulus as the other boy left. He could see the confusion and concern on his face as he waved bye to him as he boarded the train with his friends.

Walburga squeezed him tightly as the train pulled away. She squeezed him harder when they flooed home. She was squeezing him so hard, that he’d stopped screaming and was now watching little black dots cloud his vision. His eyes started to feel heavy, as she hugged him tightly his chest hurting. He let his head sag, when he was dropped abruptly onto the floor of his room.

“Right same rules as last year. No more mummy and daddy. It’s Madam and Sir now. Tomorrow it’s back to helping Kreacher clean. I want that attic spotless.” She said backing out shutting the door and locking it. Sirius rubbed his face, looking around his room, he hadn’t been in here since Regulus had come home. He skirted over climbing into his bed, he brought the covers over his head and cried silently. He missed Regulus.

The next morning Kreacher let him out, he gave him a little bread and butter. He was going to sit down when a stinging hex had him scrambling back to the floor. Kreacher sneered at him, “Mistress says no squibs at the table.”

He sunk to the floor and ate quickly, while Kreacher snarled at him. Once done Kreacher grabbed his wrist and brought them to the attic in a pop. Sirius covered his face coughing and gagging, as the dust rose.

“Mistress wants it clean. She says you can’t come out till it’s spotless.” Kreacher said, running a finger threw a thick layer of dust.

“It’s going to take me weeks!” Sirius said looking around the large cramped poorly lit room.

“Kreacher will bring you food, and let you out for the bathroom.” Kreacher said simply.

Sirius looked at him alarmed, “But it’s dark up here! Kreacher, no- please the dark is scaring me.”

“Squibs can’t say no. Kreacher will get the squib tan extra candle.” Kreacher said pulling away as Sirius tried to grab him.

“Please don’t leave me!” Sirius cried, as the elf jumped away smirking.

“Useless Squib better get busy.” He snapped his fingers and Sirius was alone. He hugged himself looking around the room wide eyed and shivering.

********

“Hey Regulus.” Severus said as he and Remus sat next to him in the library. Regulus immediately shut his book on squib rights, glancing at his friends.

“Hi, how was potions?” He asked trying to act casual.

“Easy when your partner is the smartest wizard ever.” Remus said smiling at Severus.

“Thanks.” Severus said smirking, he looked Regulus in the eye. “What where you reading?”

“Oh nothing. Just doing history homework.” Regulus said, Remus chuckled while Severus just cocked a brow.

“Right.” Severus said though he didn’t look convinced. “How’s your brother?”

“He’s fine I guess.” Regulus said, looking down. “He hasn’t written back to me once. Only mum has written. But I taught him to read and write. I thought he would like to write me.”

“Oh, he’s probably just busy.” Remus said unpacking.

“I just worry about him that’s all.” Regulus said running his hand over his book in thought. “Our mum and dad aren’t very nice to him.”

“Who aren’t your parents nice to? You?” James asked plopping down with Lily and Peter.

“No, they’re fine to me. It’s Sirius I worry about.” Regulus said looking down embarrassed, he shouldn’t talk about this.

“No way, not that sweet little guy.” James said, before leaning in. “My dad’s an ex-auror if you ever need anything. Just say the word.”

“Thanks but I’m sure I’m just over thinking it.” Regulus said putting the book away. “So what’s the plan this weekend?”

*******

Sirius didn’t think his mum would actually leave him in the attic but she was true to her word. She would stand on the other side of the door and taunt him with letters Regulus wrote. Anytime he thought he was done cleaning she would come in scoff and make him start again. It was on one of these such occasions that she finally agreed and let him out.

“Kreacher bath the squib, he stinks.” She said flatly, “We’re having company over, I want him presentable.”

Kreacher nodded gleefully dragging Sirius to the bathroom where he got a much needed bath and clean clothes. Once done Walburga pulled out her wand, he flinched back ready to be hurt but she merely dried and put up his hair. She inspected the yellowing bruising on the side of his face and arms, before shrugging. She stood signaling him to follow behind her.

She led him into a room where a few adults sat talking, one he immediately recognized as Mr. Barrick. He stepped behind her shaking as the man stood greeting her before he crouched down to look at Sirius. “Hello little one.”

Sirius tried to hide behind his mother’s skirt but she smacked the back of his head, making him step forward. “Don’t be rude I raised you better, squib!”

“Hello,” Sirius said still trying to back away as Mr. Barrick reached for him. Sirius panicked, he ran around his mother’s side to approach any of the other adults. He picked a man with a handsome face and dark hair. “Hello, I’m Sirius.”

The man smiled tightly at him. “Hello, Sirius, my name’s Tom Riddle. Pleasure to meet you.”

Sirius’s face lit up, no one was happy to see him, he heard movement behind him seeing Barrick approaching him slowly. The dread started to return, so he grabbed Riddle’s shirt pulling it. “Up, up. Pick me up!”

“Sirius!” Walburga snapped, while Riddle raised a brow. He bent down picking him up anyway. “Please my Lord forgive me for my son. He’s just a squib.”

“Indeed,” Riddle said as Sirius stared at him. “I believe that squibs aren’t completely useless. That they hold some left over ingrained magic in their blood. We just need to figure out how to extract it.”

Sirius looked at him confused, “You think I could do magic?”

“No.” Riddle said bringing him towards Barrick, “But I believe with work we could remove anything magical left in you for our own use.” Sirius immediately started to squirm, he didn’t like this. “You’re scared of Barrick, and without knowing you ran to the most powerful wizard in the room for safety. That’s why I believe squibs still may have useful abilities yet. So why are you scared of Barrick?”

Sirius was turned to look him in the eye, immediately he felt a push in his head and memories of that horrible week were pulled up. He gasped, heart racing, before Riddle laughed. “That’s all you’re afraid of losing a little blood?” His face darkened, “I can show you something really scary.”

*******

Regulus had lit his parent’s letter on fire, they wanted him to meet some Dark Lord over the summer, fat chance. He glanced over at Severus but his friend looked upset, really upset. Regulus leaned down catching the title of his book, Dark Creatures and where to find them. He raised a brow and glanced at James, he had a very similar book, only Peter was actually doing homework.

“What’s with the books?” Regulus asked startling them.

“Psh- what books?” James asked, earning a groan from Severus.

“Those ones.” Regulus said tapping the book in James hand. “Are you planning to go creature slaying?”

“No…” James said. “It’s for defense against the dark arts class. You’re just too young.”

Regulus narrowed his eyes, “Am not. What are you looking up? Vampires? Trolls?... Werewolves?”

“Werewolves, don’t be ridiculous.” James said scoffing. “Werewolves what a silly idea. Can you believe his imagination Sev?”

“We’re looking up werewolves because we think Remus is one.” Severus said making James balk.

“What? Really?” Regulus said alarmed, making Peter look up.

“Severus! Reggie, you need to keep this a Merlin damn secret.” James said grabbing him. “If this is true and it gets out he could be expelled or worse.”

“He won’t say anything.” Severus said turning back to his book, “He understands needing to keep someone important safe.”

Now it was Regulus’s turn to balk. “Freaking mind reader.”

“What?” James asked as Severus looked up eyes wide.

“Crap, I said that out loud.” Regulus said, “Severus, I know you can read minds.”

Severus made a guilty face as James glared at him. “You are have a natural legilamancy ability? Why didn’t you tell me?” James squawked as Remus approached from behind him waving. “You should just ask Remus if he’s a werewolf and read his mind for the answer!”

The three boys stuttered as James kept talking about how cool it was, and all the great pranks they could pull. Remus scanned the table seeing the books his face immediately went to hidden fear. Regulus’s heart clenched his brother often looked terrified like that.

“Remus!” Regulus said making James stop his rant, “Please sit. We need to talk to you.”

“I’m not a werewolf!” Remus said stepping back, “Y-you guys are crazy. I’m not a monster.”

Severus stood slamming his hands on the table. “My dad hits me.” Everyone froze looking at him. “He abuses me, and beats my mother. I hope you would never see me different for my secret the way I’ll never see you different for yours.”

“Severus…” Remus said stepping forward. “Of course I would never judge you.”

“Then trust we won’t judge you.” Severus said. Remus swallowed hard walking over to stand with the black haired boy, he took his hand carefully for strength.

“It’s true…” He whispered. “I’m a werewolf.”

“Doesn’t matter mate, Marauders for life. Right guys?” James said as he jumped up pulling him into a hug. Regulus, Severus and Peter quickly joined in making a tight group hug around a bitterly crying Remus. James smiled, “So I have an idea, ever heard of animagi?”

*******

Kreacher pushed Sirius deeper into the basement, as the small boy shook violently. It was so dark and scary, there where cob webs and spiders, and the floor was made of uneven cement.

“Mistress wants the whole room spotless. Just like the attic. Kreacher, will bring you food.” Kreacher said giving him a final shove. “Don’t keep mistress waiting.”

Sirius sniffled, as the elf popped away. He didn’t argue, squibs couldn’t say no. He reached out taking a cloth walking around the room, inspecting what he needed to do. He opened cabinets and shelves looking at this and that inside as he stared over whelmed at the room. This was so much. He started off dusting it was easiest and made the room more bearable.

He opened a cabinet finding some of his mother’s old fur coats. He climbed into the cabinet intent to pull them down, he would turn them into a bed, and then he wouldn’t have to sleep on the floor, like he did in the attic. He stretched up high tugging them free one by one. He stacked them in the corner and ripped open the next cabinet ready for more when something big and heavy fell on him, knocking him down.

He grunted shoving it off, he rubbed his hands before glancing to his right. Regulus’s lifeless body stared back at him. He screamed, running to the stairs and up to the door. He banged on it pleading to be let it.

“Please! Mummy! Mummy please! It’s Reggie! It’s Reggie!” Sirius yelled slamming tiny fists into the door till it was yanked open. He scrambled past his dad, who marched into the basement. A few seconds later he came back up.

“You stupid squib! It’s just a boggart.” Orion said grabbing him on his upper arm. “Lets go.”

Sirius was dragged so fast down the stairs his feet barely touched them as he was pushed in front of the cabinet. “Is- is it gone Sir?”

Orion walked over smacking the cabinet making it jerk and bounce about. “No, I think I’ll keep this one. Could be fun. It’s locked now but if this basement isn’t clean by the end of the week I’ll let your friend back out. Understand?”

“Yes Sir!” Sirius said grabbing his cloth hurrying to clean.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think without Sirius, James would give up on bullying Severus because he'd be discouraged by both Remus and Lily. Plus Sirius pushed the stereotypes against Slytherins.


	4. Chapter 4

Sirius stood eyes down, body trembling as kids ran to their parents happily. Walburga kept her nails dug into his shoulder in a silent threat. Soon enough he felt hands around his waist, he was terrified at first but then he was spun.

“Sirius! I missed you so much!” Regulus said bringing him in tight. “What’s wrong? You look upset.”

Sirius glanced at Walburga who nodded at him. “I- I just really missed you.”

Sirius held his brother tight, afraid he would disappear as they flooed home. “Hey mum, I was invited to my pureblood friend’s home for two weeks this summer. I already said yes. Alright.”

She snorted but agreed all the same. Sirius looked up at him eyes big and scared, “What about me?”

“He invited you too.” Regulus said trying to place him down but Sirius clung tight. “Fine, come on, I have so much to catch you up on.”

*******

“You can’t go!” Walburga screamed her magic crackling. “If I had known you were going to the Potter’s I never would have agreed, filthy blood traitors!”

“You can’t stop me from going!” Regulus screamed back, as Sirius tried to hide his face in Regulus’s shoulder.

“Oh yes I can!” She hollered back, “I am your mother and you will do as I say!”

“Screw you!” Regulus yelled, “I’m going and you can’t stop us!”

“Cruico!” She yelled, dropping both of them as they withered about on the floor. Once satisfied she brought her wand back. “Now go to your rooms!” Regulus struggled to his feet grabbing Sirius when she shot a stinging jinx, making him drop him. “The squib can walk on his own!”

*******

“Mum, I need money for my school supplies.” Regulus said hand out.

“We normally go together.” She replied, Sirius looked over at them from his spot in the next room polishing silverware.

“I’m thirteen, I’m meeting Narcissa and her boyfriend Lucius Malfoy, I’ll be fine.” He said waiting.

She smiled widely at this, “That’s much better. Here, have some extra galions and get yourself something nice.”

“Thanks bye.” He said slinging his bag on as he came into the room Sirius was in. He shut the door and in one scoop picked Sirius up. “Kreacher?”

“Yes young Master Regulus?” The elf said bowing.

“Finish all of Sirius’s chores, and don’t tell mum I took him.” He said strutting to the floo, he heard the elf start to argue. “Kreacher, don’t argue with me. You know how mother feels about elves who argue.”

“Yes young Master Regulus.” He said wringing his hands and grumbling.

“Cover your face.” Regulus said, Sirius did quickly, leaning into Regulus’s robes as the floo flared. He felt himself getting brushed off as they walked out, Regulus placed him on the floor holding his hand.

“Where’s cousin?” Sirius asked as Regulus snorted.

“Regulus!” James yelled, throwing himself on him. “There’s my other favorite dark wizard! Oh hey puppy!”

Before Sirius could protest James picked him up placing him on his hip as Remus, Severus, Lily and Peter joined in. Sirius narrowed his eyes at them, he should be their age, suddenly he felt very small as James lifted him like it was nothing chucking him in the air and catching him. He did not like it and immediately squirmed around.

“Oh, sorry. My cousins really like that I thought you would too.” James said.

Sirius looked at Regulus pleading for help. Regulus sighed, “Stop asking me to talk. You can talk if you want to. Mums not here.”

“Please sir, don’t throw me.” Sirius said upset.

“Sir?” James said, as the group started walking. “Just call me James. And I promise I won’t throw you.”

Sirius nodded, “James, I’m not a baby. I can walk.”

James nodded putting him down but he held his hand. Sirius wanted to protest, he looked for Regulus but his brother was farther ahead talking to Lily and Peter. Shopping was nice, Regulus bought a lot of stuff, and James bought Sirius some chocolate frogs. When Lily said goodbye he was sure they would leave too but the group of boys instead flooed to the Potter home.

They all filled into James room, James throwing himself across his bed, Severus and Remus sitting together on the floor, Peter in a chair and Regulus sitting on James desk. Sirius was a little lost till Remus called him over patting the floor beside him, he smiled sitting with him. Regulus’s friends where nice, they never called him names or treated him bad like mummy’s friends he decided.

“So,” James said sitting up, “How’s operation animal going?”

“It’s hard.” Regulus said, “My mum’s all over my case.”

“I live in the muggle world, its way harder for me.” Severus said exasperated. “I have to sneakily practice in the park at night.”

“Should we really be talking about this in front of you know…” Remus said tilting his head at Sirius.

“He’s fine.” Regulus said, “He’s smarter then he looks.”

“Alright prepare to be amazed!” James said jumping up. “Sirius, check this out!”

James took a deep breath before dropping to all four and turning into a stag. The boys started a chorus of freaking out and cheering. Sirius climbed to his feet walking up very carefully to where James once was. The stag, stomped his foot a little and shook his head. Sirius reached out just a little when the stage reached down licking his face. He screamed giddy rubbing his face as James changed back laughing.

“My turn!” Peter said huffing to his feet. “It’s not that impressive. But I can do it.”

The boy hunched up and soon was replaced with a rat. Sirius tentatively reached out holding James hand, as Peter ran around the room. He ran under the bed, across furniture, and down Remus before turning back to himself, puffing.

“Damn that was great.” James said, as the others agreed. “Sev, you’re up?”

“Oh Merlin. Last time I pulled this off I got stuck, so you jerks better help me.” Severus said as he climbed to his feet standing in the middle of the room, shaking his hands. After a few seconds of deep breathing, he seemed to melt in Sirius’s mind till a black fox seemed to form.

“Oh Severus, you’re so cute!” Remus said, patting his lap. The fox hissed at him but walked over all the same climbing in his lap allowing the other boy to pet him. Sirius started to walk but feeling James hand he stopped.

“You want to pat him too?” James asked brining him over they sat together, James placed Sirius in his lap allowing him to pat the black fox.

“So soft.” Sirius said looking at James excited.

“Psh, I was soft as a deer right?” James said earning a nod, “Hey Sev you aren’t stuck right?”

Severus lifted his head shaking it no. Remus chuckled, holding him up under the arms like a pet, laughing. “Are you sure?”

Severus immediately changed back causing him to crash into Remus. “I’m sure.”

The two laughed sitting back blushing. Sirius looked at them confused before looking up at James who was clapping, “Damn guys we’re killing it. Reggie?”

Sirius turned, eagerly watching as Regulus jumped off the table, looking smug. “I’ll have you know I got this down from working secretly in my basement every night. After Sirius went to bed.”

“The basement?” Sirius asked tensing, “But the bog-”

“Hush Siri, I need to concentrate.” Regulus said, shifting jerkily, he started to change only to bounce back to human landing on the floor. He stood back up and tried again, this time a large dark colored dog stood in his place.

“Yes!” James yelled scaring Sirius out of his lap, as the older boy threw up his hands. “We are the Marauders we are unstoppable!”

Sirius looked up as the dog walked towards him, teeth showing. Sirius felt himself shaking, and his lip trembled. “Reggie!” He cried, backing away, looking about the room for safety.

“Shit Sirius.” James said grabbing him from behind making him scream. He kicked back getting him in the balls, he dropped him holding himself. “Oh Merlin, he got them! I hope Lily doesn’t want kids!” Severus face palmed.

“Sirius. It’s me.” Regulus said crawling across the floor in human form. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you!”

Sirius glanced over at him before crashing into him. “Reggie!”

“Sirius, I don’t get it. You saw us all change. What happened?” Regulus asked patting him.

“You where scary.” Sirius said softly.

“He’s not scary.” James said recovering, “He’s great. He’s Big Dog!”

“No- no. Do not call me that.” Regulus said, giving him a blank stare.

“But we need nicknames! Remus is Moony obviously. Peter can be Mousehead.” James said.

“No.” Peter said bluntly.

“How about Wormtail?” Severus said, Peter tried to objected but James was snapping his fingers and pointing at him.

“Yes. I like that, Peter is Wormtail. Severus can be… Silfur, get it like silver but spelt with fur.” James said. “Get it? Get it?”

“Should we stop him?” Regulus asked Sirius as Severus hid his face in his hands.

“James sit down. It’s getting painful.” Severus said through his fingers.

“Furboots?” James said pointing at Severus.

“That’s just wrong.” Peter said.

“Foxxy!” Remus said happily.

“Merlin I’m going home.” Severus said trying to stand up.

“Fennec. Like a fennec fox?” James said, that actually made Severus sit down.

“I’m ok with that.” He said, glancing to Regulus. “What about him?”

“I have just the name-”

“Snuffles!” Sirius said throwing his arms up as the boys froze looking at him.

James looked a little confused before recovering. “Yes! Yes! Regulus is Snuffles.”

“Wait what?” Regulus asked, as James reached down grabbing Sirius.

“No, no arguing Snuffles, the counsel of cuteness has decided.” James said smirking.

Regulus rolled his eyes. “And what’s your nickname oh fearless leader?”

“That’s easy Lord-”

“Prongs!” Sirius said cutting him off, “Because of the thingys on your head.”

“Well we can’t argue with the counsel of cuteness.” Remus said.

“The counsel has spoken!” Peter agreed slamming his fist.

“Psh! Well duh, that’s because it’s a great name.” James said, “I like it Sirius, I really do. But now you need a name little baby Marauder.”

“James he’s not a baby!” Regulus snapped.

“Hush Snuffles.” James said, looking at Sirius. “I got it, Padfoot.”

********

When their mother had figured out that Regulus hadn’t gone with their cousins she was mad, when she figured out he took Sirius she was furious. They had screamed at each other late into the night. Sirius had heard many curses spewed from his mother’s mouth, all of which he recognized. His father had come in and told him exactly what would happen to him when Regulus left in a few day. He sat crying locked in his room till Regulus got the door open then he took him to bed, red faced, tear stained and limping but Regulus was still there.

When Regulus left he was heartbroken, normally Walburga let him go to see him off at the station but Regulus and her got in another screaming match that morning and his brother had left angrily on his own. Walburga had wine and watched the fire crackle, while Orion made good on his promise. He took Sirius upstairs and burned everything but his mattress and clothes.

Sirius cried watching everything he own go up in flames, before Orion turned to him. He removed his belt, and pulled down Sirius’s pants yanking him over his knee. “Magic doesn’t get through to you. So let’s try the muggle way, squib.”

********

A month later Sirius still couldn’t sit right or lay on his back, this seemed to be their new favorite form of punishment. He sucked up his tears walking into the room where all his parents guests where, with his little serving platter with drinks.

“Drink Sir?” Sirius asked looking away as he held up the platter.

“Oh Walburga.” Abraxas Malfoy, Lucius’s father, said laughing. “I love what you’ve done with the squib. So much more useful, then what my father did.”

“Stunting.” Walburga said pleased, taking a drink from the tray. “Oh it works wonders. John Barrick will be here soon, he can tell you more.”

Sirius pulled the tray in close walking to the next group. “Drink Madam?”

His cousin Bellatrix whirled on him with her fiancé Rabastan Lestrange. She got in his face laughing. “Well, well, well look who’s still alive? Little baby Sirius.”

“I’m not a baby…” He said looking down.

“Really and how old are you?” She asked taking a drink.

“Uhhh…” He racked his brain, “Fourteen.”

“Ha! More like four.” She said tipping his tray making all the mixed drinks dump on him. “Uh oh, little baby had an accident.”

His eyes watered as he bent down to pick up the cups and small shards of glass when he felt a sting on his behind making him cry out. His mother charged up to him furious. “What did you do?”

“It wasn’t- I mean- It’s was an accident.” He stammered, she whipped out her wand making him flinch. “No! No mum-Madam no!”

“Squibs can’t say no!” Walburga yelled getting him across the face with a stinging hex.

“Walburga, Walburga.” Barrick said walking up, placing a hand on her shoulder. “Please dear it’s alright.”

“Hello John, pleasure to see you.” She said, “He’s just being a tad disrespectful.”

“Hello, little one.” Sirius tightened in on himself, as the man reached down pulling the small boy up into his arms. Sirius’s face contorted in displeasure as the man held him up by his bum. He smiled as he spoke to his mother. “What are your plans for the holidays? I would love to have the little one over again.”

Sirius felt his breath quicken, he looked at his mother, pleading. She ignored him, “I haven’t thought too much on it. But if you’re offering, I may take you up on it.”

“Oh I’m definitely offering.” He said bouncing Sirius, “We had so much fun the last time.”

********

Regulus screamed shredding the letter to bits as Severus nearly choked from surprise next to him. His friends gave him a questioning look but Regulus was on his feet and throwing his books in his bag. He pushed away from the Gryffindor table and stomped away. “I’ll see you guys later.”

“Hey Reggie wait!” James called catching him outside, he wrapped an arm around him.

“Go away James, I just need some time.”

“Your mum doesn’t want you home again?” James asked, Regulus’s face dropped as he nodded.

“Everyone’s going home this break, even Remus and Severus. And I miss Sirius.” He said looking at him.

“I know buddy. Hey come stay with me!” James said smiling.

“What? I don’t know. Are you sure your parents wouldn’t mind?”

“Psh! Reggie, you’re like my little brother.” James said.

Regulus’s heart jerked he was already someone’s little brother. He looked at James again, it would be nice to spend Christmas with people. “Alright, if you’re sure they won’t mind.”

James smile widened, “No way, they’d love to have you Snuffles!”

“Don’t call me that!”

********

Sirius sat quietly on the kitchen counter as Barrick made food. The man looked at him and smirked handing over a potion on a spoon. When Sirius didn’t open his mouth, Barrick made a tisking noise. “Now little one, you need to take the blood replenisher to be ready for later. I don’t want to have to punish you for disobeying. Unless you want me to?”

Sirius opened his mouth taking the potion. Barrick smiled, “Good boy.”

Sirius shivered. He was picked up, he didn’t fight back anymore. Squibs couldn’t say no. He just knew what would happen and accepted it. Plus he didn’t want to get hurt anymore. He was brought to the couch and forced to sit on his lap as the man gave him a little plate of scrambled eggs. He tasted a potion on them quickly he gave the man a suspicious look.

“Do you need me to feed you little one?” He asked. Sirius quickly ate more and more till his eyes started drooping. “Uh-oh, you look tired. Best get started then.”

He held Sirius tight to his chest, carrying him to his potions basement as he hummed Christmas songs. Sirius opened his eyes just a pinch as he laid on the table the man above him moved his arm about. He saw the glint of a blade. “Oh little one I’d go back to sleep. I need some more blood and I’m going to see if squib’s skin have any fun properties...” Sirius felt his eyes flickering shut just as his arm started to pinch. “I’m dreaming of a white Christmas…”

********

“Severus you’re face!” Regulus said as his friend looked up from his book, sporting a huge black eye and busted lip.

“Nice to see you too.” Severus said rolling his one good eye. “Can you not start with me? Remus and Lily where already all over me on the train. I came out here to avoid people.”

“But- what? But your face!” Regulus said, making his friend slam his book shut.

“Yeah my face! Tobias clocked me a few times. Not a big deal.” Severus said standing using the tree for support. “I thought you would understand.”

“Why would I understand?”

“I don’t know, ahh, let’s see. Oh yeah Sirius?” Severus hissed. “You know that little squib brother you have that doesn’t age and is afraid to even talk.”

“How’d you know?” Regulus asked, glancing down.

“I figured it out. I used to be afraid to talk to people too. He does things that remind me of how I was at that age. I won’t tell anyone but stunting is wrong. You should really get him away from there… And I know they’re probably hurting you too.”

“What? You’re going to give me advice on my brother and family. But you won’t talk to anyone about yours!” Regulus snapped.

“It’s different! I’m protecting my mother! When I’m of age, I’ll get her away from that monster!”

“Well, I’m protecting him!” Regulus snapped. “The Black family has lots of power and social standing. If I tried to blow the whistle on this they’ll cover it up. They could do something worse to him. My best hope is to turn seventeen and take him away from there. Then I’ll hide him and I’ll cure him and he can grow up and be my normal brother again! I don’t care if he is a squib! I’ll save him, who cares if I get hurt in the process!”

Severus seemed taken back but Regulus spun on his heel and walked away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm writing Barrick and he makes me feel creepy. But honestly James and Sirius still had to give each other nick names- I mean come on.


	5. Chapter 5

Sirius had been bad, he wasn’t sure what he did but he was locked in the boggart room again. He had his arms around his head and tear tracks down his face as he knelt there his backside to soar to even try to sit. He wouldn’t look at the boggart because that’s what it was, he knew it was. He also knew it was in Regulus’s body again, just lying there pale, unmoving. He rocked back and forth, if he was good they’d let him out.

It was different when Regulus came home this summer. There was a lot more fighting and yelling. Sirius didn’t like it, it made him feel bad. He just hid in Regulus’s room, or in his closest the few times Regulus would storm out for the night. However every time he fell asleep in the closet he would wake up in Regulus’s bed snuggled into the other boy.

Sirius tried to do all his chores to keep mummy happy but Regulus would always find him and make Kreacher do them. Then he’d take Sirius away, they would go for walks, or go shopping and on a few occasions they would see James, Peter and Remus. Then they’d go home and the screaming and fighting would start again.

His mother was wailing at the top of her lungs. So Sirius had hidden himself deep under Regulus’s bed when the door slammed open. He screamed as he was dragged out by of foot but Regulus only hushed him.

“Where are you going!?” Walburga screeched, as Regulus ran down the stairs with Sirius. “What are you doing with him?”

“We’re going out!” Regulus snapped.

“Regulus Black if you take one more step with that squib I will disown you and I’ll never let you see him again.” She snarled.

Regulus froze, he looked at her. “You wouldn’t dare.”

“Watch me!” She snapped. “Now go back to your room.”

“Yes mother.” Regulus said retreating upstairs, he pulled Sirius in close getting hit by her spell alone. He stumbled nearly dropping Sirius but he pulled himself through and locked them in his room. He laid on his stomach setting Sirius in front of him. “You know I almost did it Siri.”

“Did what?” Sirius asked watching him.

“Severus wrote to me and it gave me so much confidence.” He said pulling out his letter. “He ran away Sirius.”

“Wait, you won’t see him again?” Sirius asked shifting onto his belly.

“No I’ll see him. Apparently things got really bad at his house. Really bad. And he packed a bag and well… Now he’s living with Lily’s family, and muggle authorities and aurors are involved.”

“Auror’s they help wizards and witches in trouble. I want to- I wanted to be an auror…” Sirius said fidgeting with his shirt.

“You would have made the best auror.” Regulus said rolling over. “It’s a full moon tonight, I hope Remus is ok.”

“Why, is he sick?”

“Something like that.” Regulus said pulling him closer. “Sirius, you’d tell me, if you didn’t feel safe right?”

“I feel safe.”

“All the time?”

“When you’re here yeah!” Sirius said laying on him, Regulus hummed in response.

******

When Regulus left for his fourth year at Hogwarts Sirius barely cried. He knew what to expect to the point that it felt normal. He spent the year cleaning, serving, locked in his room and getting beatings or sent to the boggart room when he was bad. Orion had though taken to testing new spells on him or letting Barrick come and test potions on him. Sometimes if he was lucky he would get a potion that knocked him out, one time it made him sleep for nearly a week.

He was getting better at avoiding his mummy and daddy and that seemed to make them happy. However at Christmas he was still sent to Barrick’s and that still scared him. The man made him feel wrong. Mildly he wondered if that’s what Regulus meant by safe.

When Wlaburga picked him up, he was pale and tired despite the blood replenishing potions he still felt awful. This time however she didn’t floo or apparate home, she walked with him holding his hand, half dragging him through Knockturn Alley and into Diagon Alley.

“Mummy- I mean, Madam, where are we going?” Sirius asked.

“Narcissa got engaged over Christmas, so were are picking up her engagement present.” She said, tugging him into an antique shop, she leaned down. “Stay here, and don’t touch anything. I would have left you if I could.”

He looked around bored when he spotted a man with a staff and a strange magical eye. He walked a little closer ever so shyly trying to get a look when the man’s eye swerved to him looking him up and down. The man turned his full body to him showing off a scared face.

“What are you looking at?” He asked, stomping closer. Sirius looked down, face pursing, he didn’t want to get in trouble he didn’t mean to be bad. The man seemed to sense his unease and stopped, sizing him up. “Oh don’t be scared, you little- thing. I’m an auror. I’m the good guy.”

“Are you bugging this man?” Walburga snapped marching up to deliver a small stinging hex to his backside.

“It’s frowned upon to use stinging hexs on children, Mrs. Black.” The man said standing up.

“Don’t tell me how to parent, Mad Eye.” She said sneering. “It’s none of your business.”

Sirius stayed looking down he was definitely in trouble he wrung his hands and tried not to cry as he was hauled out of the store. He was dragged in front of his father the second they got home.

“What did he do?” His father asked glaring up from his book, wine glass in hand.

“He was talking to an auror at the store!” Walburga screeched.

“I didn’t say anything to him Sir! He talked to me.” Sirius defended knowing it was pointless.

“An auror, what a stupid squib.” Orion laughed, “Did you know auror’s want squibs stunted, or thrown from the magical world. If an auror caught you they’d take you away. You’d never be able to see Regulus again, and you would have to live in the muggle world all alone. And that’s if they don’t send you to Azkaban.”

“Azkaban?...” Sirius asked softly.

“It’s where the worst witches and wizards go.” His mother said, “Why do you think you’ve never met any other squibs? You should be better behaved we’re protecting you from them. If an auror ever asks you need to tell them how happy you are at home.”

“You wouldn’t want to get taken away from us? And never see Regulus again would you?” Orion asked placing his things down and removing his wand.

Sirius cried, “I don’t want to leave Reggie.”

“Then we have to punish you. For nearly ruining it.” Orion said giving his wand a wave.

******

The school year seemed to fly by to Regulus. He stood talking to James and Mr. and Mrs. Potter. “Thanks so much again for have me at Christmas. I really wish I could come this summer, but my brother Sirius…”

“Just bring your brother.” James said quickly. “You are like family Reggie, and Sirius is really cute.”

“I don’t know…” Regulus said looking down. “Mums kind of weird about- it.”

“Would you like us to talk to her? Fleamont used to be an auror so if she’s nervous that could help.” Mrs. Potter offered.

“No, I’ll work something out.” He said, “I should go, they’re probably looking for me. See you later.”

He waved bye, before setting off, he saw Severus and Lily walking with the Evens and Peter and Remus where with their parents. Soon he saw Walburga, his shoulders sunk but he smiled anyway, he glanced around her feet but didn’t see Sirius.

“Where’s Siri?” He demanded.

“Well hello to you too.” She said bluntly. “He’s home, he refused to come.”

“He did?” Regulus asked suspicious as she brought him home via side along. “Sirius! Sirius!” When he didn’t hear feet he spun on her angry. “Where is he?”

“Last I saw him he was in his room.” Regulus turned ready to run when she grabbed him. “I’ve arranged for you to meet the Dark Lord this summer.”

“What are you crazy?” Regulus snapped. “I’m not joining that band of nut jobs.”

“You will join. You will not be like those blood traitors and mudbloods you have become associated with.” She snarled.

“Get off me!” Regulus yelled. “I’m not like you!”

“You will join or I’ll make Sirius pay for your disrespect. Do you understand?”

Regulus stared at her, he pursed his lips. “Yes mother.”

“Good boy.”

“Sirius!” Regulus yelled, running up the stairs, he yanked open the door and gasped, his room was more destroyed then ever. He glanced around before finding him huddled in the depths of his closet. Regulus reached in slowly, “Hey Siri.”

“Reggie!” He very quickly had arms full of the boy.

“Hey, why didn’t you come great me.” Regulus said, carrying him to his room.

“No reason.” Sirius said. Regulus tried to sit him on the bed but Sirius panicked and clung tighter to him. “Don’t put me down! Don’t leave me.”

“But Sirius I won’t leave you.” Regulus said, he obliged sitting holding the smaller boy. “So, I want to spend a few weeks with James. I thought we could talk to his dad, he’s an auror and-”

“That’s bad!” Sirius cried pulling back to look at him determined. “We can’t leave. Squibs are bad!”

“You aren’t bad!” Regulus snapped, making Sirius flinch. “Sirius… I think we need to talk to someone like Sev did last summer. I think that-”

“Why do you want to leave me!?” Sirius yelled, twisting about tears forming. “Is it because I’m a useless squib! Or that I’m so little!”

“No Sirius. I want to bring you with me.” Regulus said but Sirius wasn’t listening.

“I’m sorry I can’t do magic!” Sirius cried trying to free himself. “Stop holding me! Just go be with your magic friends!” Regulus let him go, immediately Sirius crawled away from him and ran from the room.

It only took a few days for Sirius to come around and want to be with Regulus again but Regulus was still hurt, though he tried to swallow it. His mother was true to her word and he met the Dark Lord. He talked a big game, he said a lot of crazy things and Regulus decided that he would never join this man.

********

All too quickly he was leaving back to school leaving behind a crying Sirius but he couldn’t do anything for him. Sirius wouldn’t let him. He was sitting with Peter and Remus, when James, Severus and Lily joined them. James sat next to him with Lily on his other side, while Remus practically shoved Peter to make room for Severus.

“Missed you over the summer.” James said, “What’s up you look down?”

“I- I need to tell you guys something and I need you to not freak out.” He said looking at them, they all nodded. “I met… The Dark Lord this summer.”

“What?” James snapped, while everyone else stared.

“I didn’t want to but mom threatened Sirius. So I couldn’t say no.” Regulus said.

“Oh Reggie.” Lily said softly, “Is he alright?”

“Yeah… No. No he’s not.” Regulus said getting horrified looks. “Sirius is… my older brother.”

“Wait? How?” Asked Peter.

“He’s stunted.” James said in realization.

“Stunted?” Lily asked.

“It’s an old wizard practice.” Severus said, “It’s terrible and they should make it illegal.”

“They take squibs,” James said, “And they stop them from growing in hopes that their magic will show. But if they do it too long it becomes permeant.”

“Regulus, I’m so sorry.” Remus said, taking his hand while Lily’s eyes teared up. “If you don’t mind me asking. How old is he really?”

“He’s your age, he should be sixteen in November.” Regulus said, “I think that’s why I gravitated towards you guys. James, you really remind me of how he used to be.”

“Reggie, I’m always here for you you’re my best mate.” James said, “So what will you do?”

“Sirius, is too afraid to leave. And if I leave they’ll hurt him. The Black family has lots of power and social standing. If I tried to do something about Sirius they’ll cover it up or they could do something worse to him. My best hope was to turn seventeen and take him away from there. But with the whole Voldemort thing. I may need to do something sooner.”

“Dumbledore.” James said, “He making this army, my parents are a part of it. They’re fighting him. He could help you and Sirius.”

“He has a lot of supporters James, he’s really powerful I could feel his magic just being in the room with him.” Regulus said looking down, “I’ll work with Dumbledore but if I have to join to keep Sirius safe then that’s what I’m going to do.”

“I’ll join with you.” Severus said earning gasped of horror.

“You don’t mean that!” Remus cried.

“Not _really_ join him.” Severus said. “But I’m a natural with legilimency and occlumency, I’m a great fighter and I can take a beating. I have motivation. I think that I would make a great spy.”

“You’ve been thinking of this for a while haven’t you?” Lily asked, earning a shrug.

“Severus.” James said taking his shoulders with a stoic face. “That’s the single coolest thing I’ve ever heard you say.”

“Thanks…”Severus said awkwardly.

“Also it helps that Voldemort is obsessed with werewolves and your boyfriend is one.”

“He’s not my boyfriend!” Remus and Severus yelled in unison blushing.

“Yeah sure and Lily’s not my girlfriend.” James said.

“But I’m not.” She said.

“Details.” James said waving her off. He wrapped an arm around Regulus. “We’ll talk to Dumbledore and my dad. We’ll get you and Sirius out of that house.”

“Thanks.” Regulus said softly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Why is James so fun to write? :)


	6. Chapter 6

When James, brought Regulus to Dumbledore the man was quiet, he listened to everything with a tight grip on his wand. Once Regulus was finished his explanation he sat back an upset expression on his face.

“Can you do anything Headmaster?” James asked.

Dumbledore sighed deeply looking at them. “Unfortunately at the moment no. Though this is very troubling. I will help you in any way I can my boy. However with your brother it becomes more complicated. I will have to inform the auror’s. I have a friend, who takes cases like these very personally, Allister Moody.”

“That’s my dad’s old partner.” James said excited, he looked at Regulus. “He’s great, he’ll help Sirius.”

“Indeed, Mr. Black I’m going to need you to meet with him and tell him everything.” Dumbledore said, pulling out a scroll and quill. “I’ll write to him and have him over as soon as possible.”

“Thank you sir.” Regulus said.

“In the meantime,” Dumbledore continued. “We should look at removing you from that house. Perhaps you could stay with the Potter’s.”

“No.” Regulus said quickly, startling them both. “I will absolutely not leave that house without Sirius.”

“My boy it’s not safe-”

“Exactly! It’s not safe. So why would I leave him any more then I have too?” Regulus said gripping his chair tightly. “He’s my brother. I. Won’t. Leave him.”

James whistled as they left Dumbledore’s office. “Damn, I’ve never seen anyone snap at Dumbledore like that. Reggie you’re crazy.”

Regulus looked at him arms crossed and unamused. His eyes tilted to the ground upset, “I can’t leave him James…”

“And you won’t.” James said pulling him into a sideways hug. “Come on, let’s get to the shack the guys are probably waiting for us.”

*******

Sirius didn’t look up as Barrick talked to him. He held Sirius’s hands bouncing him on his lap, while the small boy looked down furiously. Barrick stopped talking and pulled him in close hugging him, his hands wandering his back.

“Oh you are so cute, little one.” Barrick said pulling him back just enough to look at him. “How old are you now?”

“Five…” Sirius said, as the man laughed.

“You know what I mean.” He said, leaning back so he could pull Sirius flush with his lap. “Are you seventeen yet?”

Sirius immediately felt uneasy, he shifted his weight which made the man smile. “Reggie said I turned sixteen in November.”

“Aww, not legal yet.” He said shifting Sirius back to his knees starting to bounce him again. “Next year then.” Sirius didn’t feel right when he said that, he felt his face crumple embarrassed and fearful. The man just laughed taking his hands and making flying noises as he bounced him.

******

“Reggie!” Sirius yelled wrapping his arms around the taller boy. “I missed you! I missed you!”

“I missed you too.” Regulus said hoisting him in the air. “Hello, mother, father.”

“Regulus.” They said smiling. Sirius looked at Regulus confused but the boy, merely ignored him talking to their parents a little before carting Sirius to his room.

He stuck Sirius on the bed. “I have something for you. Well- it’s from James but here.”

He held out a stuffed stag, Sirius’s eyes lit up, he took it quickly. “I love it! I’m going to call him James.”

“What about Prongs? That’s his animagi name.” Regulus said sitting rubbing his back, Sirius shimmied away from his touch.

“Ok, Baby Prongs.” Sirius said looking at the stag.

“Siri, does you’re back hurt?” Regulus asked peeking down the back of his shirt seeing the old and new welts.

Sirius looked over his shoulder at him. “Not today.”

Regulus hummed, “Hey Sirius, do you think, James is brave?”

“Yeah!” Sirius said looking at him excited, “He is an animalguy and he hangs out with a werewolf and he’s big and strong and plays quidditch and-”

“Hey I’m all those things too.” Regulus said slightly put off.

Sirius scrunched up his face, “I know!”

“Ok, so you think James is brave. So this is Baby Prongs, he’s going to help you feel big, brave and strong too. Understand?”

“Yes sir.” Sirius said on reflex while patting the stag.

Regulus flinched. “So this week, we’re going to go meet someone and I need you too not be afraid and talk to him ok?”

“Who?” Sirius asked looking confused.

“Err… A friend of James.” Regulus said.

Sirius looked at him excited, “Will James come?”

“Merlin, do you a crush on him?” Regulus asked, making Sirius face scrunch up. “I’ll ask him to come. I’m sure he’d be happy too.”

“What about mummy?” Sirius asked.

“Don’t worry about mum.” Regulus said, patting his head. “I’ll talk to her.”

*******

Sirius wrapped his arms and legs tightly around Regulus as the other boy snuck downstairs and to the floo. He had Baby Prongs wedged between them stuffing his face into Regulus and one of the antlers. The floo flared around them and soon he looked up to see Diagon Alley as Regulus hurried through the streets. They stopped in front of Ollivanders when Regulus finally put him down, taking his hand.

“Regulus! Sirius!” James called running up to them.

“James,” Sirius said turning to him. “Reggie hold Baby Prongs.”

“I’m not your servant.” Regulus said taking the stuffed animal anyways as Sirius reached up to take James’s hand with his newly freed one. He smiled up at them as they started walking, with Sirius tugging their hands jumping up and down. Regulus cleared his throat speaking, “So where are we meeting your _friend_?”

“The Leaky Cauldron.” James said, “In a private room.”

“James, thanks for the stag.” Sirius said pulling his arm. “I wanted to name him James but Reggie said no. So I named him Baby Prongs, just like you!”

“Aww, thanks Padfoot.” James said swinging him just a bit. “We should get you a Snuffles one too.”

“Yeah a Reggie doll!” Sirius agreed, while Regulus glared. When they walked into the pub and inn, Regulus and James steered him right towards the stairs, together they lifted him by the arms carrying him over the stairs. They went to the first room on the right, where a man sat on a bed waiting. Sirius jolted in his steps seeing the magical eye looking him over, he was an auror.

“Good to see you James, Mr. Black, Mr. Black. Come sit!” Mad Eye Moody said gesturing at the two chairs. Regulus pulled him onto his lap as they sat, he turned him to face Moody. “My name is Allister Moody, I’m a- _friend_ of James’s parents.”

Regulus sighed deeply squeezing Sirius too him. “I’m Regulus and this is my older brother Sirius.”

Sirius looked at Regulus alarmed. He was an auror, he was bad. He’d take Sirius away from Regulus, he looked back at the man panicking. Had he been bad? Why did Regulus want to send him away? They started talking but he was panicking and didn’t listen to them. He started to squirm when Regulus grabbed him.

“Siri stop. It’s ok.” Regulus said looking down at him. “Why don’t you tell Moody about home?”

“Home?” He asked looking at them eyes wide. He buried his face in Baby Prongs, while Regulus patted his back.

“Take your time.” James said softly.

“Hey remember, you have me, James and Baby Prongs.” Regulus said, “Remember you said you would be brave, like Prongs.”

He looked up at Moody, he remembered what his parents said and was determined he wouldn’t let him take him away from Regulus. “Home is nice, I have my mummy and daddy. And Reggie when he’s home.”

“What?” Regulus said shocked, “Tell him about your room.”

“It has a bed and all my clothes and a big closet to hide in.” Sirius said nodding.

“Why are you hiding?” Moody asked.

“From Reggie and mummy when they fight. It’s scary.”

“How old are you?”

“Five.” Sirius said.

“Sirius stop lying you’re not five!” Regulus snapped. “You’re going to be seventeen this year!”

Sirius looked away tears forming. “I’m not lying and I’m not bad!”

Regulus stood him up quickly, he yanked up his shirt in the back showing off cuts, bruises and puncture marks. “What are these?”

“Accidents!” Sirius said pulling back down his shirt. Sirius started to cry, Regulus was mad at him. He was going to be in trouble. “Stop it Reggie!”

“Sirius you need to talk to him, it’s important!” Regulus said.

“He’s bad! He’s a bad man!” Sirius yelled kicking as Regulus tried to pick him up. “You’re a bad brother!”

“Sirius you don’t mean that.” Regulus said faltering. “I love you.”

“If you love me take me home! Take me home now! I want to go home!” Sirius screamed, he was having a meltdown. He knew he was acting like a child, but his emotions where fried. Regulus was trying to get rid of him.

“Sirius stop!” Regulus yelled, quickly losing control of the situation. “Moody please is this enough to go on please!”

“Look there are bad signs but it’s not enough evidence.” Moody yelled over Sirius’s screaming.

“Take me home! Take me home!” Sirius yelled flailing in Regulus’s arms.

“Listen son.” Moody said casting a silencing charm on Sirius. Sirius looked at him crying still trying to scream but nothing came out. “You said he’d be seventeen in November. Well then he’ll be a legal adult. They won’t be able to come after him. If you catch my drift.”

“So at Christmas…” Regulus said as Sirius struggled. “James would you-”

“Absolutely my house is always open.” James said.

“I didn’t hear any of that.” Moody said breaking the spell, with a wink, letting Sirius’s screaming fill back up the air.

He pushed away from Regulus, he wanted to give him away at Christmas. But why? Sirius had been good lately. “You’re a bad brother! I don’t want to go!”

******

Sirius avoided Regulus, until he went back to school. He refused to come out and see him leave. Instead he stayed in his room crying. Regulus was heartbroken. He didn’t understand what went wrong. He was just trying to save him. He stared out the window gloomily as his friends excitedly talked about their final year.

“Cheer up Regulus” Peter said punching his shoulder, “You’ll graduate next year.”

“We could come and visit you on Hogsmead weekends.” Remus offered. “Right Sev?”

“Yeah.” Severus agreed taking Remus’s hand.

“Wait, wait. What’s this?” James said pointing at their hands. “Son of a- You two finally got together!?”

Both teens blushed awkwardly as Lily chuckled. “So that’s why you stayed at his place half the summer.”

“Damn it!” James cried, “Lily and I were supposed to be the power couple of the group!”

“James we aren’t dating.” Lily said.

“Then be my girlfriend!” James yelled.

“Wow, romantic.” Severus said making Remus chuckle, as Lily glared at James.

“James Potter I’ll be your girlfriend but only on the condition that you ask me properly.” She said crossing her arms.

“Deal babe.” James said, laying back wrapping arms around her and Regulus. “So Snuffles what’s the deal for Christmas?”

Regulus breathed deeply. “I’m going to go home, no matter what mum says and getting my brother. Nothing is going to stop me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little short but I'm already reviewing the next chapter. So I'm hoping to have it up soon. Poor Sirius, poor Regulus- Please let me hear your thoughts. :)


	7. Chapter 7

Sirius pressed against the wall, trying to look small as possible as Voldemort and his followers stood around talking to his mother and father. “We would be honored for you to mark our son upon his graduation.”

“Indeed, he will make a great follower. The house Black is a noble and old one.” He paused looking at Sirius. “Such a shame about the squib though.”

“We’re putting him to use.” Walburga said, signally Sirius over. She snatched his arm revealing the marks and scars on it. “Every year at Christmas we send him to John Barrick, he’s researching potions with squib blood and skin.”

“Interesting.” Voldemort said as the man in question approached. “Any progress on extracting dormant magic?”

“Unfortunatly not yet My Lord but I am hopeful.” Barrick said mouth curling into a smile as he looked at Sirius. “He’ll be seventeen this year. Soon I can do so much more with him.”

“Good, don’t keep me waiting. I want to see results.”

*******

Walburga seemed to still be encouraged by her party with the Dark Lord, since as soon as she could around Christmas she handed Sirius off to Barrick. The man seemed very eager, he held Sirius close taking him straight to the couch to sit, rubbing his shoulders.

“You know you truly amaze me. I’ve never seen a squib stunted so young. Now look at you, seventeen. Legal.” He said, pulling Sirius flush with his lap. Sirius didn’t like this, he tried to push him away but the other was stronger. He rolled his hips in a way that made Sirius’s stomach twist up.

“Please stop.” Sirius asked but the man only chuckled, squeezing him as he pushed his hips up and down. Sirius swallowed hard, this felt wrong, he didn’t like it. His face was getting red and his stomach was doing flips. “Please stop.”

“Oh little one, squibs can’t say no. Besides you’re turning red, it’s so cute.” He panted, slipping fingers into Sirius’s pants pulling them down to his thighs. Sirius held his stomach as he started breathing shakily. “Just got to reach under you little one. My pants are getting a bit tight.”

Sirius felt the motions under him, his stomach went right up his throat. He leaned over throwing up all over himself and Barrick. The older man immediately yelled, throwing him off. Sirius continued emptying his stomach on himself, the couch and the floor.

“You disgusting squib!” He yelled once he stopped. Sirius’s eyes watered, his stomach hurt and he was covered in vomit. He was grabbed and back handed so hard he saw stars. He was crying openly now, big wet tears, his stomach started seizing again, he was sure he was going to throw up again. However for all his pain though he was thrilled Barrick wasn’t touching him.

*******

“Sirius!” Regulus yelled stepping through the floo with James as his back up. “Sirius!”

“I don’t think anyone’s home.” James said looking around.

“Kreacher!” Regulus called making the elf appear with a pop.

“Yes young master Regulus?” He asked, before seeing James. “Filthy blood traitor!”

“Stop it Kreacher.” Regulus snapped, “Where’s Sirius?”

“The mistress and master went away.” He said glaring at James. “The squib is with his babysitter.”

Regulus reached down grabbing him. “Who? Where is he? Take us there now!”

“Kreacher is…” He paused when Regulus gave him a shake.

“Now Kreacher!” Regulus hissed, Kreacher flinched but snapped his fingers all the same. They landed outside the potions shop in Knockturn Alley. “My brother’s in there?”

“Yes.” Kreacher said as Regulus shoved him away letting the elf leave.

“Come on Reggie.” James said throwing open the door making the bell ding.

A man looked up from the counter, “Mr. Black what a surprise.”

“Where is Sirius?” Regulus snapped. “Mum wanted me to pick him up, there’s been a change of plans.”

“She did?” He said surprised. “Very well. I only wish she had informed me sooner.”

“Just take us to Sirius.” Regulus said glaring. The man nodded leading them in to the upstairs house and down the hall. He unlocked a room revealing Sirius sound asleep, face swollen and discolored, body pale and breathing hard. Regulus rushed in grabbing him, but Sirius didn’t stir. James gave his wand a spin collecting all Sirius’s stuff into a bag.

“I’ll be contacting your mother, about this rude behavior and her sudden change of plans.” The man said glaring as Regulus passed him.

“Make my day.” Regulus said storming out once outside James took his arm and side along apparated them to his house. The second they landed panic set it. “What’s wrong with him James? Why hasn’t he woken up?”

“Mom! Dad! We have a problem!” James yelled as they entered the house making the two elderly parents run into the room.

“Oh Merlin,” His mother said trying to take Sirius but Regulus held him tight scared. “Regulus sweetie let me see him.”

“I’m going to floo call Moody, and Dumbledore!” Fleamont said.

Mrs. Potter took Sirius laying him down on a couch casting a diagnostic spell, her eyes widened. “This is beyond my abilities, he needs to go to St. Mungo’s.”

*******

Regulus sat shaking in St. Mungo’s, James on one side with Lily and Peter on the other. Severus had opted to stay with Remus since it was the full moon but they had written saying they would visit as soon as possible. Sirius was just lying there looking so small as the doctors revealed a nasty list of problems from breaks in the skin, to broken bones, and even an unknown potion in his system. He felt sick, he didn’t know it was this bad.

He bit his lip trying to listen to Moody, “Listen, he’s a squib he can stay in this world. However he’s seventeen but is really a five year old. I’m putting through all the charges I can to get Regulus and Sirius taken away but someone needs to file for guardianship.”

“I want to take Sirius.” Regulus said earning a deep sigh from the Potter’s.

“Too young, you’re a minor yourself.” Moody snapped.

“We’ll be taking them.” Fleamont said sternly. “Both of them. Regulus when you turn seventeen and graduate Hogwarts, we’ll give you guardianship. You have my word.”

“Thank you.” Regulus said, “Can we, can we make him grow up?”

“It may not possible I’m afraid.” Moody said, “He’s been stunted for too long, we would need a great potions master that can dedicate time to this-”

He stopped as rapid tapping sounded on the window. Mr. Potter opened it letting the owl fly over offering its leg to Regulus. He took the note off, immediately the howler unfolded.

“Regulus Black! You have been burned from the family tree! You little blood traitor! How dare you! How dare you embarrass me so! You little ungrateful-” Walburga’s voice was cut off as James incinerated the letter.

*******

When Sirius woke up he wasn’t sure where he was. He knew it was a comfy bed, which he didn’t have, in a room he sort of recognized. He carefully climbed one handed to the corner dropping down he wobbled across the floor sore looking at the big beautiful door. He reached up surprised it wasn’t locked, he popped it open slowly before tumbling down as the door was opened fully.

“My wards where right you’re awake.” An older woman’s voice said. He looked up around his swollen eye, confused as hands grabbed him. He started to kick back when she began talking. “Don’t you recognize me dear? I’m James’s mummy. Euphemia but you can call me Mia everyone does.”

He looked at her now, he was so confused. Why was he with James’s mummy? Where was Mr. Barrick? Where were his parents? Where was Regulus? He turned in her arms settling her with a look. “Where’s Reggie?”

“He’s at school baby, you were asleep a long time.” She said placing him down. “He didn’t want to leave you though.”

“I’m not a baby!” He cried distressed as she tried to hand him a potion. His eyes widened, “Please! I won’t talk back! I didn’t mean to be a bad squib!”

“Honey, honey. You weren’t bad. This will make you feel better.” She said trying to offer it to him, he shook his head no, covering his mouth. His eyes watered he wasn’t supposed to say no, now he was going to be punished. She smiled softly at him bringing it to her own lips taking the teeniest taste. “See. It’s ok. I promise. I’ll take care of you.”

He stared at her surprised before he reached out carefully taking it from her. He wrapped his hand around it the other arm still limp, he drank it slowly. It didn’t taste good, but he didn’t want her to be mad at him. Once done she took the empty vile.

“I know it tastes yucky, but it’s going to make your arm feel much better.” She said, “I’m going to make a floo call. You stay here and I’ll bring you a surprise. Alright?”

“Yes Madam.”

“Mia.” She corrected, “Do you need the potty before I go?”

He shook his head no. She reached out making him flinch but she merely kissed his head. He sat alone in the well-lit, nice room, he looked around, seeing toys, books and other fun things. He nearly screamed with joy seeing Baby Prongs propped on a chair by the bed. He scrambled down grabbing him, before pulling himself back up onto the tall bed. His chest hurt but he was just happy to have Baby Prongs. He placed him down on his lap seeing the quidditch themed quilt, he rubbed his hand over the soft fabric by the snitch.

“Sirius!” He looked up as Regulus ran into the room crying, he threw himself on the bed pulling him close in the biggest bear hug ever. “I was so worried! You didn’t wake up. I didn’t know what that man did to you.”

“Reggie.” Sirius said weakly wrapping his little scared arm around him crying. “I’m sorry, I was bad. If I was good then he wouldn’t have hit me, or made me take that potion.”

“You’re not bad!” Regulus said pulling him on his lap as James and his parents joined them.

“Why am I here Reggie?” Sirius asked rubbing his bruised face as his brother cried burying his face in Sirius’s hair. “Reggie?”

“Sirius,” James said rubbing Regulus’s back comfortingly. “Listen buddy, we know. And it’s not right, mummy’s and daddy’s shouldn’t do that to you. And we know you’re seventeen and a squib. But that’s ok! My parents and I we’re going to take care of you. You and Regulus are going to live with us now.”

“Oh Sirius,” Mia said collapsing her hands together. “We’ll have so much fun. I’m going to teach you to bake cookies and we’ll go to parks or go shopping.”

“I’ll take you broom riding.” Fleamont added.

“But… But… I’m a squib. Squibs should clean and not be seen.” Sirius said feeling Regulus’s hug tighten.

“That’s not true.” Fleamont said, “Squibs, can have wonderful lives. Look at muggles they don’t have magic and they have very fulfilling lives.”

“But I’m little. I’m stunted…” Sirius said, confused.

“Sirius, do you remember my friend Severus?” James asked. “Black hair, dower, dates the local wildlife. He is honestly- and don’t tell him I said this. He is honestly the best potions maker, he’s going for a masters in it. So if anyone in this whole world can help you it’s that sly fox.”

“Reggie?” Sirius asked making the other teen finally look at him. “You’re not sending me away.”

“Of course not!” Regulus said, “Sirius, I love you, you’re my brother. I’m going to be here you. I’m going to take care of you forever.”

*******

Living with the Potter’s was different. Sirius honestly wasn’t sure at first but he found it nice after a while. The first morning he woke up and tried to clean, Mia had just picked him up and brought him back to bed, stating he needed rest. After a few attempts to clean or do house work Mia had tried to explain that the house elves could do it but he got frustrated at this. He was supposed to help Kreacher so he should help their elves. Mia and Fleamont soon made him a deal, he had to keep his room clean and that was it. So Sirius would carefully clean it every day to keep them happy.

When he had tried to take his food to the floor he was picked up and put in a chair, it was distressing. He was only allowed in a chair when Regulus was home and Regulus was not home. So Mia and Fleamont would sit with him on the floor for all his meals, then slowly they got him sitting on the couch and finally they got him to agree to sit in a chair after a few weeks.

Magic was another issue, it didn’t matter what was happening if Sirius saw a wand he was flinching or covering himself in a panic. So Fleamont had started trying to narrate himself whenever he used it but Sirius would still back away unsure. He was getting used to the Potter’s though, they never hit him, or used magic on him but he knew it was only a matter of time.

He was standing by Mia watching her make tea, when she handed him his own cup with a cooling charm. It was warm and smelled yummy, he tilted it taking a little sip when it dribbled down his chin. He reached up one handed wiping his mouth with the back of his hand when his cup slipped shattering around his bare feet.

“Sirius!” Mia said turning quickly.

“I’m sorry.” Sirius cried, covering his face as he backed away.

“No Sirius don’t move!” She said pulling out her wand, Sirius’s eyes widened.

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” He yelled running away from her. He heard her calling but ignored her, he’s done it now he messed up a good thing. They would hate him. They’d know what a useless squib he was. He ran upstairs nearly tripping sprinting to his room, and straight to the closet. He hurriedly went inside covering himself with lose clothing till he felt good and buried, only then did he start to cry.

The knock on the closet door surprised him. His parents always just opened it and dragged him out, even Regulus would just open it and take him out. There was a second knock then Fleamont spoke, “Sirius, can you come out please? I promise, Mia’s not made at you. She’s actually really sorry for scaring you. Sirius, she was scared you’d step on the glass and hurt yourself. That’s why she yelled. Please come out.”

Sirius carefully uncovered himself. She was sorry? She was scared he’d hurt himself? He crawled to the door opening it just a crack to look at him. Fleamont smiled gently at him while Mia stood a little ways back looking at him. He almost shut the door when he saw her but her face was crumpled and he could tell she was holding in tears.

“Why is she crying?” He asked opening the door.

“I’m crying because I made you feel unsafe.” She said crouching down. “I never want you to feel that way because of me.”

He looked at her unsure before crossing the room very slowly. Once he was close enough he wrung his hands for a few seconds watching her. She looked at him sadly but made no move to touch him, which he liked, people were too quick to grab him. He thought of what Regulus did when he was upset and reached out very slowly patting her shoulder. “There, there. It’s ok.”

She laughed around her tears. “Thank you honey. I feel much better.”

*******

Sirius woke up very excited, Regulus was home for the summer and James told him he had graduated so he would be home to spend more time with him. He rolled over in bed poking Regulus’s face, “Reggie, Reggie wake up.”

“Sirius… Five more minutes…” Regulus groaned flopping over onto his back.

“But Reggie, I wanna get up.” Sirius said giving him little shakes.

“Go wake up James…” He muttered throwing an arm over his eyes.

“Ok!” Sirius said sliding from their bed, he had his own but never bothered with it preferring to sleep with Regulus for safety. He grabbed Baby Prongs and ran down the hall to James room, he slipped into the room rushing to James bed. He threw Baby Prongs up, grabbed the top blanket and pulled himself up. He crawled over poking James, “James, James, get up.”

James opened one eye peering at him sighing, “Regulus sent you over huh?” Sirius nodded excited, James groaned doing a time spell he winced seeing it. He grabbed Sirius making him gasp as he pulled him under the covers to hold like a teddy bear. Sirius squirmed nervously as James shushed him. “It’s too early, go to sleep.”

Sirius frowned he couldn’t say no but he wanted to get up. He whined against James as the other man groaned. James just shushed him, dozing back off. Sirius squirmed a little more before giving up, he wrapped his little arms around James and closed his eyes. Unfortunately for James that was the day Sirius decided he could sleep in James room when he wanted, the older man never cared and would simply move over whenever little hands pulled on his blankets.

“Hold still.” James said fastening Sirius into the harness, Sirius did as he was told letting James loop the straps between his legs. Sirius smiled at him, James was taking him on a date as James said. They were going to go flying, get lunch, go shopping and maybe even get ice cream. James said they had very important errand to run while they were out.

“That’s not right.” Regulus said, pulling two straps over his shoulders as James fitted the last lose strap to his broom. “James if you drop my brother I’m going to kill you.”

“He’ll be fine.” James said picking up Sirius positioning them both on the broom. “He’s strapped in and ready to go. Don’t worry Mama Snuffles.”

Regulus slapped him playfully, James laughed wrapping and arm around Sirius as he kicked off the ground. Sirius waved goodbye while Regulus looked pale. “Sirius I swear to Merlin you better hold on with both hands!”

Sirius did as he was told as James let him go. This was amazing. James ducked and weaved the broom making him laugh and Regulus curse from the ground. James laughed along with him before actually starting to fly to their destination. It wasn’t too long a ride but Sirius was shifting around uncomfortably by the end. When they landed James unbuckled him, shrinking the harness to put in his pocket, while he strapped the broom to his back. He took Sirius’s hand and they started their adventure.

First James brought him to lunch getting them fish and chips and rootbeer floats. Sirius had never had a rootbeer float and spit up at the carbonation, James laughed cleaning him. Sirius had pushed the float away after so James got him a chocolate milk instead. Then James took him shopping, getting him enough chocolate frogs to make even Remus sick.

“Don’t tell Regulus.” He said shrinking them into a small bag. He took his hand again leading him to a toy store but Sirius dug his heels in the ground, he wasn’t a baby. James laughed it off taking him to a book store and then to a jewelers. He grabbed Sirius putting him on the counter as he spoke to the man. Sirius looking around at all the pretty jewels and displays as the man showed James a few rings.

“Padfoot what do you think? Which is prettier?” James asked holding up two. Sirius cocked his head, before pointing to the one on the left. James nodded, he had the man wrap the ring in a little box. The man wished him good luck as James put the box in his pocket as he nervously smiled. He grabbed Sirius putting him on his hip as they left.

“Thanks for coming with me Sirius.” James said as they finished their chocolate ice-creams. “I was so nervous on my own and I didn’t trust the guys not to blab. So figured I’d take my best little buddy.”

“Why did you buy a ring?” Sirius asked as James enlarged the harness.

“I’m going to ask Lily to marry me.” James said. “Do you think she’ll say yes?”

“I’d marry you!” Sirius said jumping up and down making the other man laugh.

“Aww, I’d marry you too Padfoot.” James said smiling softly. “Remember though the ring is our little secret.”

Sirius nodded. James struggled getting the harness on. He kept moving Sirius this way and that but was having no luck. Sirius waited patiently as James stared at the harness. A laugh sounded behind them, making James look up.

“James Potter is that you?” A man with red hair said walking up, twin red headed babies strapped to the front and back of his chest. A red haired woman followed him holding a toddler and the hand of a child probably Sirius’s age while an older red haired boy stood a little ways back.

“Arthur Weasley? And is that Molly Prewett?” James said standing shaking hands.

“Molly Weasley now and these are our boys.” Arthur said happily, he looked down at Sirius eyes widening. “Merlin Potter I knew you were promiscuous but what is he five?”

“He’s not mine! He’s Regulus’s brother.” James said quickly rubbing the back of his head.

Sirius listened to them talk and catch up, the red headed boys tried to approach him but he wasn’t having it and got behind James. He glanced around them a little bored as they talked, he lazily watched the people walking around them. He suddenly found himself making eye contact with his mother, Walburga sat across the road sneering viciously at him. He clung to James’s pants watching her, she started gesturing for him to come over wand in hand. His breath quickened watching her, her nails tapped on the table impatient. He swallowed hard starting to walk towards her making her smirk.

He got about three steps away when James grabbed his hand, telling him not to wander off. Sirius turned away from her, he felt uncomfortable and started to squirm upset. James looked down smirking. “Aww- you ready to go home Padfoot?”

Sirius nodded hiding his face in James legs, making Arthur chuckle. “I’ll see you later James.”

“Yeah bye Arthur.” James said looking back at the harness before quickly looking up. “Say Arthur. You have a lot of kids, know how to put a harness on?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Regulus is a Mama Bear, James is adorkable, The Potter's are so kind and Sirius is precious. Aww- it's getting better. What could possibly go wrong?


	8. Chapter 8

Sirius sat on the floor between Regulus’s legs watching Severus destroy Remus in wizard’s chest, while Peter rattled his fingers on the ground impatiently. Sirius smiled up at Regulus as he snuggled with Baby Prongs. Regulus would look down every once in a while at him before going back to watching Remus’s crushing defeat.

“Oh I’m so bored.” Peter said throwing his hands up. “What’s this big news James has to tell us? I mean he’s not even here.”

“Don’t know, but if Sirius can be patient you can.” Remus said moving his piece only to have Severus smash his king a second later.

“Can I play?” Sirius asked leaning forward.

“Sure I’ll teach you.” Remus said patting the ground by him.

“Maybe I should teach him.” Severus said, “You know if he wants to actually win.”

“You wound me.” Remus said hand on his chest.

“It’s my turn anyways.” Peter said, scooting over.

Sirius crawled away from Regulus giving him Baby Prongs, he sat on Severus instead. He noticed he looked less than thrilled and was going to get off when Severus started explaining the rules. Soon he hushed Severus and started giving little orders to the pieces, however they would not listen to him so he had to tell Severus every move. Peter was killing him. He looked at Severus upset, missing Remus and Regulus’s disapproving glares at the chubby man.

“Don’t worry you’re doing fine.” Severus said waving his hand as he talked, Peter cried out as his butterbeer knocked over onto him.

“You did that on purpose!” Peter yelled using a drying spell.

“I didn’t see anything.” Remus said innocently.

The door burst open making Sirius cling to Severus as James ran in yelling. “She said yes! I’m getting married!”

“It’s true he asked me!” Lily cried showing off her ring. Sirius watched the guys congratulate them and soon Lily started talking wedding plans. “We don’t want to wait, with the war that’s coming we want to be married by the end of summer!”

“It will be grand.” James said, “Regulus, you’ll be my Best Man. The rest of you my groomsmen!”

“Not so fast James Potter.” Lily said crossing her arms. “Severus has been my best friend since we were eight, he’s going to be my Man of Honor, with Alice and unfortunately my sister as bridesmaids.”

Severus hid his face in his hands agreeing while Peter and James gave him shit eating grins. Sirius furrowed his brow struggling free of Severus to run to James. “What about me? What am I?”

“A flower boy!” James said, Sirius scrunched up his face.

“James, don’t tease him.” Lily said, “You can be our ring bearer.”

********

The day of the wedding James and the guys where in their best dress robes, James had even gotten special one made for Sirius. Regulus was fussing over him while James paced around nervously. The door opened as Severus came in looking exhausted, holding his own robes.

“Shouldn’t you be with the girls getting your makeup done?” Peter asked.

Severus rolled his eyes, “I’ve had enough of girls and make up. I just had to get Lily in her dress. Haven’t I been tortured enough?”

“Wait, you got Lily in her dress?” James asked, rounding on him.

“Yes but you can take her out of it.” Severus said changing. “Don’t worry it does nothing for me. Not the right parts.”

The guys laughed and the wedding went on. Regulus gave him a little pillow with rings on it and was told when to walk down. However seeing the large crowd and being separate from Regulus had him cowering. Lily came up behind him in her white dress, looking at him softly.

“Sirius are you ok?” She asked.

“I’m scared.” He said looking at her.

“Well Regulus and James are out there. Just focus on them and walk down. I’ll be right behind you.” She said standing him up. Sirius nodded, took a deep breath and started to walk with his pillow. People leaned over ohhing, and ahhing at him, getting really close. He looked up panicked seeing Regulus and James encouraging him forward. He dropped the pillow and ran barreling into Regulus’s knees hiding his face. He thought they’d be mad but James laughed rubbing his head and Remus simply retrieved the pillow and no one seemed to mind.

********

Sirius missed Regulus, but this was the first time he wasn’t terrified when his brother left for school and he got to live with James. James did work most days but Lily was there and she would play with him, the guys would visit and Regulus would send owls. Lily held his hand as they walked through Diagon Alley, she smiled softly at him.

“So,” She said clearing her throat, “What should we have for dinner?”

“Spaghetti!” He said hanging off her hand.

“Mmm… That sounds yummy.” She said pulling him into the little shop.

She grabbed a hand basket and began filling it, when he saw some candy. He wandered over to it glancing back at Lily as she smiled at him nodding approval. He turned back, going to his tip toes to see it better. He licked his lips at the chocolate frogs, he reached out carefully trying to grab just one.

“Hello little one.” Sirius’s blood ran cold, he turned around quickly seeing Mr. Barrick smiling wide at him. Sirius turned to look at Lily but she was distracted looking the produce over. A hand landed on his shoulder rubbing small circles down his arm as Barrick crouched in front of him. “It’s almost Christmas. Do you think we’ll spend time together? I have certainly missed you little one.”

“Reggie says I don’t have to see you anymore.” Sirius said trying to sound brave although his body trembled.

“Oh, that’s cute but you know the rules squibs can’t say no.” Sirius felt his chest tightening, and his breath quickening as the man gave him a slow look over. He leaned into Sirius’s ear, “I _will_ see you later you naughty little one.”

“L-Lily!” Sirius screamed, as he pulled away scared. He covered his face tears flowing, feeling the tiniest bit of a stinging hex. He backed up hitting his head on the display behind him knocking things over. He was going to be in so much trouble. He was grabbed and immediately started screaming, and squirming.

“Sirius! Sirius! It’s me, stop kicking!” Lily called, rubbing his head. He settled down slowly burying his face in her chest. “Sirius what happened?”

“I’m not a bad squib! I’m not a bad squib!” He yelled into her chest as she tried to calm him.

“Of course you’re not.” Lily said trying to sooth him. “You’re a good boy.”

Despite her best efforts she couldn’t calm him. He worked himself up till he was gagging, at which point she took him home. She just barely could get him through the door without dropping him as he squirmed, he had immediately run for the closet and refused to talk to her.

He woke up late into the night in his bed and swore he saw Barrick in his room. He had grabbed Baby Prongs and scampered to James and Lily’s room throwing open the door, startling them both from their _wrestling_ match. He ran up hauling himself onto the bed as they stared at him red faced. He crawled over to James holding him as the man shimmied around a little uncomfortable.

“Well…” Lily said wrapping up in a blanket and heading to the bathroom. “I’ll be right back.”

“Ahh… Hey Padfoot, what’s wrong?” James asked.

“There’s a man in my room.”

“What!? Lily get out here!” James screeched moving him to grab underwear and shorts. He rushed out wand in hand leaving Sirius to sit in misery on the bed. A few seconds later, Lily came out dressed in pajamas.

“Where’s James? What’s going on?” She asked her wand fisted in her hand as she sat by him.

James walked back into the room exhausted, “Sirius it was just a bad dream no ones in your room. Come on, I’ll put you back to bed.” Sirius scrunched up his face hiding behind Baby Prongs, he nodded trying not to shake. James sighed, “Do you want to sleep with us?”

“Yes please.” Sirius said softly.

“James…” Lily said.

“Lily he normally sleeps with Regulus.” James said tucking him between them. “Besides it’s just for tonight.”

“Famous last words James Potter.” She said with a laugh.

********

Sirius was so excited Regulus was home for the weekend James had gotten him from Hogwarts and now he was here. Sirius held his brother tightly as the group sat in a circle them on a chair, James and Lily on the love seat, Peter in another chair and Remus on the couch with Severus laying down across him.

“So why did I have to get pulled out of school to watch Severus sleep?” Regulus asked.

“It’s important.” James said smiling, “And Sev, wake up!”

“Go away.” Severus muttered rolling to face Remus. “I’m doing a masters in potions and I was up all night. Order meeting, Death Eater meeting, and then Dumbledore meeting.”

“We all appreciate your hard work.” Remus said rubbing his hair.

“Damn it this is important! Has anyone even seen Sirius’s shirt!? It’s been like an hour.” James moaned.

“Yeah,” Severus said snuggling into Remus. “It says ‘Big Brother’, how muggle very cute. Did you get Regulus a matching ‘Little Brother’ one?”

“Lily wouldn’t let me.” James muttered, Sirius felt Regulus whip him around pulling the shirt tight to read it. “Think about it though.”

“No way.” Regulus said quietly.

“Congratulations!” Remus said, starting the chorus from everyone else. Sirius just pursed his lips confused. Remus gave Severus a shake. “Hey sleepy, Lily’s gonna have a baby.”

Severus stayed still before it seemed to click. He rolled over looking at her. “No sir, are you serious?”

“No I’m Sirius.” Sirius said getting chuckles, “Where is the baby?”

“It’s in Lily’s belly.” James said proud.

“Ok, but how did it get in her belly?” Sirius asked making Peter laugh.

“Err… Ahh… Ask your brother.” James said, making Sirius turn to Regulus expectantly.

“Ahh- When two people really love each other one day they wake up and- poof there’s a baby in their belly.” Regulus said awkwardly, earning a ‘smooth’ from James.

Sirius looked at Lily confused before focusing on Severus and Remus. He opened his mouth but Severus cut him off. “No. Don’t even ask.”

Sirius huffed looking at them before turning back to Lily and James. “James, will it be half stag?”

“What no, Sirius why would it be a centaur?” James said confused.

“Because you’re a stag.” Sirius said holding up Baby Prongs like it was obvious.

“Sirius that’s not- Lily is the baby half stag?”

“No, just half idiot.” She said face palming.

********

Regulus felt Sirius press into him as he weaved his motorcycle through the sky’s to the Potter’s house. When they got there, Sirius hopped off running to the door to wait. Regulus smirked, Sirius had really taken a shine to Harry which was good. What was bad however was his friends where treating Sirius more and more like a baby.

He opened the door watching his big brother run to one year old Harry telling him random things. Regulus glanced around, seeing his friends looking distraught. Lily’s eyes where red and wide, hand to her chest while James paced erratically.

“What’s going on?” Regulus asked.

“It’s Severus, there’s a problem.” James said stopping to look at him.

“Voldemort figured out he’s a spy!” Regulus gasped.

“No…” James cleared his throat. “There was a prophecy. About how to defeat Voldemort, Dumbledore told Severus to tell You-Know-Who to try to get Severus into his inner circle. It worked…”

“But he wants to kill Harry!” Lily cried, covering her mouth. “He thinks it’s about him!”

“We’re going into hiding.” James said. “Under the fidelus charm. I called you here to ask you to be our secret keeper.”

“Oh James.” Regulus said, “I’m so sorry. I’d be honored to but Sirius… I can’t put him at risk. Plus wouldn’t I be an obvious choice?”

“Then what should we do?” James asked hands going to his hair.

“Severus can’t because of his position.” Lily said through tears.

“And Remus can’t because of his condition.” James said grabbing his shoulders. “Please Regulus I can’t let anything happen to Harry.”

“And I can’t put Sirius in any more risk.” Regulus said, his eyes lit up. “Make it Peter! They would never suspect him.”

“Yes! Brilliant, yes!” James said. “I’ll tell the guys and Dumbledore right away. I already told them I was going to ask you.”

“No.” Regulus said. “Talk to Peter first. Plus it’s the full moon tomorrow night, you know Severus and Remus will be busy.”

“Yeah true.” James agree. “I’ll tell them after Halloween, good plan. Thanks Regulus.”

“It’ll be ok James. I’m here for you.” Regulus said as James pulled him into a hug.

********

Regulus sat watching Sirius doze beside him, chocolate wrappers scattered about. He pet his brother’s hair but an uneasy feeling had been growing in his stomach all day. He picked him up carrying him to his room before stopping, Sirius would probably end up in his bed anyway. He walking into his room and tucked the boy to bed. It was a nice night out, he smirked maybe taking his bike out would clear his head. He glanced at Sirius setting charms to alert him if he woke up before sneaking out.

He backed the bike out slowly before taking to the sky. He was right this did make him feel better it was so nice out. He sighed feeling relief. He did a few loops, and drove down to the water. He pulled the bike up ready to head back when he felt the pull off the Potter’s wards. He whipped the bike around and flew straight there, it wasn’t far.

He pulled up, hands tightening at the destruction, he felt his heart stick in his throat. But how? He heard movement, he turned around seeing Peter standing hands wringing. He was furious. He jumped off his bike charging him as the fat man screamed.

“You! You did this!” Regulus yelled, raising his wand. “You betrayed them!”

“I had too!” Peter cried, “He was going to kill me!”

“So what! I would have died for my friends!” Regulus snapped.

“Liar!” Peter yelled, “You wouldn’t be their secret keeper because of your squib brother! You wanted to live just like me!”

“Leave Sirius out of this!”

“I had no choice!” Peter yelled, pulling out his wand. “It was them or me!”

“We were friends! They were your friends!” Regulus snapped, “I’m taking you in for their murder.”

“No please Regulus don’t.” Peter cried, “I’ll go to Azkaban, my wand snapped!”

“You deserve it.” Regulus said waving his wand.

“Walburga’s going after Sirius!” Peter yelled. Regulus faltered caught off guard, Peter raised his wand confuddling him. He stepped back trying to clear his head, as an explosion started. He threw his hands up casting a shield charm as he was thrown backwards.

When he opened his eyes to blinding lights and muddled feeling of the confuddle still groggy in his head. He glanced around realizing he was floating behind Moody, he jerked but nothing moved. “Where am I?”

“You’re under arrest.” Moody said, “For the murders of twelve muggles along with the wizard Peter Pettigrew and selling out the Potter’s to Voldemort.”

“What!? I’m innocent! It was Peter! He was their secret keeper! It was Peter!” He yelled thrashing about as best he could. “It was Peter! He’s a rat! He’s a rat! Where’s Sirius! Sirius needs me! Get Severus and Remus they know! Stop!”

“Oh your poor little squib brother!” Moody yelled whirling on him. “That poor little boy that you turned to a smear of blood before you went on your murder spree!”

“What!? Sirius! No never!” Regulus screamed, “Where is he!? Peter did this! Stop! It wasn’t me!”

He felt himself get silenced, as Moody glared at him. “They have a special place in Azkaban for people like you Black.” He kept throwing himself about trying to scream as he was dragged away.

********

“Wake up squib!” Sirius jerked awake, as he was grabbed by the hair and yanked from his bed. “This game of yours and Regulus’s is over!”

“Reggie! Reggie help!” He screamed over and over as his mother dragged him out of the bedroom, he looked up seeing Barrick.

“Hello little one.” He said softly, using his wand to slice open Sirius’s arm. He collected the blood before splattering it around the room. “Such a waste…”

“Mummy, mummy please don’t take me!” Sirius cried, “I want to stay with Reggie. I’m being a good squib. I promise.”

She whirled on him and slapping him hard across the face. “I’m not your mummy! I do not have squib children! Squibs do not argue with wizards, wizards can take whatever they want from squibs. Do you understand?”

“Yes Madam.” Sirius cried, looking down dejected as she dragged him away bruising his arm in her grip.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> R.I.P. James Potter - you were a pleasure to write, very fun.  
> R.I.P. Lily Potter - you were a good person
> 
> Sirius it's rude to interrupt people when they're 'wrestling'...  
> Poor Regulus, feeling so helpless... Poor Sirius... 
> 
> I'm hoping to update Friday. Please let me know what you think! :)


	9. Chapter 9

Remus rubbed his face tired, the full moon was tomorrow night he was already sore and exhausted just thinking about it. He followed Severus around the Malfoy’s going away party for their son Draco. It made it hard to believe that he would finally see Harry again after ten long years. He hoped he was well, that he would be happy at Hogwarts.

Severus had made it clear that he would continue his role as a double agent when Harry started incase Voldemort returned. Which was why they were here now socializing and gathering intel as Severus would say. Remus would call it over stimulation, everything smelt so strong. He could feel Moony pulling at him when they past the buffet station.

Severus seemed to notice him staring, he raised an eyebrow before giving his eyes a light roll with a soft smile. Remus felt his heart melt, he had such a sassy husband. He gave him a shy smile before walking over and helping himself to a rather large plate of finely sliced roast pork and slathered it with gravy. He brought it to a table and ate it greedily while he watched Severus continue doing rounds.

He smelt Draco before he saw him, he swallowed and turned to the eleven year old. “Hello, Draco, it’s not polite to stare.”

“Hello, Mr. Lupin.” Draco said giving a little sneer. “Are you still working as a grounds keeper at Hogwarts?”

Remus sighed, there were no teaching jobs available still. “Why yes I am. I help Hagrid and sometimes Mr. Filch.”

“A magicless half giant and a filthy squib. Real glamorous.” Draco said with a nasty look.

“Sorry you feel that way.” Remus said turning from him to look for Severus, when he didn’t see him he subtly sniffed the air for his scent. “I happen to enjoy Hagrid’s company, and Mr. Filch is- dedicated, to his work.”

“My father says if they can’t do magic then they’re a waste of time.” Draco said.

“Draco stop bugging Mr. Lupin.” Narcissa said sitting with him, her perfume was so strong it was giving him a headache. Draco made a face but left all the same. Narcissa looked at him smiling she reached out placing a hand on his shoulder. “How have you been? We’ve barely spoken all night.”

“I’m well Narcissa.” Remus said, though strict he actually did enjoy her company. “Excited to have Draco off at Hogwarts.”

“Excited and nervous.” She said watching Draco run to join his friends. “But that’s ok, I’ll have you and Severus to look out for him. Oh dear I think you spilled a little.”

Remus looked down sighing, in his haste to eat the wonderful smelling food he had spilt on himself. He looked at Narcissa, “Please excuse me.”

She smiled waving him off. He stood up giving one last glance at Severus before hurrying to the men’s room. He exited the hall searching for it, he went to one but it was locked. He was going to wait when he smelt the mouthwatering aroma of meat. He followed it a few doors down till he spotted a kitchen he peeked inside seeing elves cooking. He opened his mouth drawing in all the delicious smells and something else, Moony seemed to think it was familiar. Without thinking he pushed open the door startling the poor elves.

One quickly ran in front of him. “Hello sir. May Dobby help you sir?”

“Oh, ah… No thank you- oh actually. Might you have something to clean my robes with?” Remus asked.

“Yes sir. Dobby will fetch something right away sir.” Dobby said running.

“Thank you Dobby. And you can just call me Remus!” He called, when a plate smashed. He whirled around seeing a couple of startled elves around a wide eyed child in a poorly done glamor. Remus paused looking at him, he was familiar. He walked up to him slowly, he felt Moony inside him going absolutely crazy. The child kept watching him even as he bent down trying to clean the glass. Remus swallowed dryly. It couldn’t be. They mourned him. They buried him. Remus walked right up to him crouching down. “Sirius?”

The child seemed to startle at this but he raised a brow at him, like he was unsure and waiting for Remus to do something, ever so gently the child nodded ‘yes’. Remus swallowed harder taking out his wand. The reaction was nearly violet with how fast he threw his hands up to protect himself. Remus just blinked slowly, breaking the glamor on the child. Instantly he changed from soft pale face to showing horrible cuts and bruising over any exposed flesh. Remus even could see a few teeth missing, his hair was lightly matted and he definitely malnourished. His heart broke he had to get him out of here.

He reached down undoing his robes. Sirius reacted in a way that made Remus want to throw up, he covered himself and backed away tears forming. “Sirius, I’m not going to hurt you. It’s me Remus you remember me right? …Regulus’s friend?”

Sirius nodded submissively. Remus tried to do his softest friendliest smile, but on the inside Moony wanted blood. He undid his robes all the way revealing his pants and shirt. He moved slowly, pulling the battered boy to him. Once he was sure Sirius wasn’t going to freak out, he lifted him, pulling him flush to himself. “Wrap your arms and legs around me and hold on.”

Sirius did as he was told, Remus prompted him to lay his head against him. He stood closing the robes, hiding him from sight. He cast a notice me not on himself, this was unfortunately the best he could do on such a quick moment, but he dared not leave and try to come back. He looked at the elves. “Please don’t say anything.”

“If Remus sir promises to save him then Dobby promises we will not tell a soul.” Dobby said touching his chest the other elves copied him waiting for an answer.

“I promise Dobby. Thank you.” Remus said, grabbing Sirius when he felt him slipping. He took a deep breath then power walked straight to Severus, he snatched his upper arm. Giving Lucius another man a polite smile. “Sorry, I need my husband.”

He pulled him away as Severus protested. “Honestly Remus, what’s wrong? You’re that anxious? I was having a very interesting chat with Lucius and John Barrick.”

Remus felt a little shudder from inside his robes, his heart ached thinking of poor Sirius. He let Severus rattle on since he didn’t trust his own voice not to betray him. He just dragged him out and straight to the apparition point. Without waiting he side a long apparated them to Hogwarts.

“Severus I need to tell you something and I need you to not freak out.” Remus said as they landed holding Sirius through his robes

“When do I freak out?” Severus asked bored.

“This may be one of those rare occasions.” Remus said, opening his robes. Severus’s mouth dropped open stuttering as Remus wrapped his arms around Sirius trying to comfort the still and quiet boy. “Severus, don’t freak out.”

Severus seemed to swallow whatever he was going to say, in favor of nodding wide eyed. “Remus, is that… Is that Sirius?”

“Yes.” Remus said softly, holding him out just a little to show his face.

“Alright… You take him to Madam Pomfrey and I’m going to meet you there with Dumbledore. Ok?” Severus said nodding to himself, his eyes a wider than normal.

Remus smiled, “Thank you love.”

“Mmhmm.” Severus said turning a bit stiffly.

Remus knew the man was silently freaking out but he was holding it together the best he could. He took Sirius and went straight to Madam Pomfrey when the woman saw Sirius she went into healer mode, demanding him on the bed as she grabbed her potions cart. Remus tried to lower him but his eyes went wide and he started looking around franticly while tightening his hold to Remus. In the end he would not touch the bed, so Remus pulled all the blankets and pillows to the floor making a little nest on the ground where they sat as Pomfrey ran spell after spell. Sirius kept his face pushed into Remus’s chest the whole time as Remus tried to keep a calm composure.

Pomfrey leaned back sighing, “He’s underweight, and very obviously has topical damage. Nothings broken now, but things have been broken and healed wrong. I can reset his bones tonight and then we can work on the rest.”

“Alright,” Remus agreed, as she pulled out a potion.

“Dear I need you to drink this. It’s going to hurt, but in the morning you will feel a thousand times better.” She said trying to get him to take it. Sirius looked terrified at the potion but he reached out with shaky hands taking it. Remus felt the boys whole body shudder as he drank, he face twisted up looking at Remus scared.

“Good job.” Remus said trying to sound approving, as he rubbed his back. “Remember it’ll feel bad now but Madam Pomfrey is a healer, you’ll feel much better in the morning. Alright?” Sirius nodded going back to hiding his face in Remus’s chest.

He always loved the way Severus smelt, he loved it since they were young but it was a huge relief to smell him approaching now. He walked in followed by Dumbledore and Moody. He sighed happily as Severus didn’t question them sitting on the floor and simply cast a softening charm where they were before sitting down next to them.

Sirius turned his face just enough to see Severus, Severus in turn gave him a small smile. “Do you remember me? I’m Severus.”

Sirius nodded, he reached out slightly before pulling his hand back like he’d been burned. Severus didn’t seem to care, he silently and wandlessly cast detangling spells as he ran his hand over Sirius’s hair.

Dumbledore cleared his throat, “I see what you mean Severus. This is quiet troubling.”

“What should we do?” Remus asked.

“Sirius is on record as dead.” Moody said, “I have brought the paperwork to fix that. However he will need a legal guardian.”

“Severus love,” Remus said holding the boy close. “I know we’ve never seriously thought about kids or anything like this. I know it’s sudden and neither of us are in a good place for this. I know it’s hard and-”

“Remus,” Severus said getting his attention. “I already signed.”

“I love you.” Remus said leaning over quickly kissing him. “Do you think they will try to come after him?”

“We don’t know who ‘they’ are.” Severus said simply, “However I believe not as that would reveal who they are and that they did _this_ to him.”

“There will be an investigation.” Moody said cracking his knuckles. “I’ll promise you that I’ll personally see to it.”

Remus covered his mouth, “He didn’t do it. He didn’t kill him. After all this time, he was telling the truth. He needs to know.”

Severus looked at him realization in his eyes, but Dumbledore spoke. “Yes but he did still betray the Potter’s, and commit mass murder. It’s better this way. Safer for Sirius this way.”

Remus wasn’t so sure but he nodded all the same. He felt a pull on his shirt, he looked down at Sirius the poor thing was exhausted. “I think that’s enough for today. He needs a bath and to go to sleep.”

“I want him to stay here tonight. I need to keep an eye on him.” Pomfrey said, “There’s a washroom through there, I’ll add some potions to help heal and calm him.”

Remus nodded standing taking Sirius with him when Severus stood in front of him holding out his hands. “You need to fill out the papers I’ll take him.”

Remus nodded trying to hand him over, the boy held tight but soon gave in moving to Severus. He felt his heart breaking watching those wide eyes keep watch of him as he was taken from the room. When he found out who had him he would make them pay, he felt Moony agreeing with him.

The bath was not easy, Sirius was scared of the water, he was terrified of being naked and he did not want to be touched. Remus almost had to leave the room after seeing the extent of his bruises, on his pelvis, legs, chest and back but he stayed strong. It took a lot of careful work and slow movements but they got him clean and in freshly transfigured clothing. After, it was back to the floor nest, Sirius seemed unsure of them but when asked if he wanted space he simply shook his head no. So they slept on the floor of the infirmary.

Remus was incredibly stiff when he woke, his neck hurt and his back was in knots. He was used to sleeping uncomfortably on the floor, but the little foot pressing into his side was new. He sat up slowly, seeing Sirius wrapped around Severus while the other man was lost in thought looking at the child.

“How long have you been up?” Remus asked.

“Long enough.” Severus said, “Listen, I know tonight’s the full moon but… I want to stay with him.”

“I wouldn’t want you anywhere else.” Remus said nodding.

Severus gave him a brief smile, before moving Sirius carefully. “I’m going to go into town a while. I’ll be back later. Alright?”

“Really? You don’t want to be with us?” Remus asked concerned.

“This is important. Keep him safe till I’m back.” Severus said giving him a kiss on the cheek, he stood stretched then left in a flurry of robes.

Sirius slept a long time, it scared Remus, it reminded him of when James and Regulus rescued him so many years ago from _who knows where_. He cursed them wishing now more than ever he had pushed them to know what had happened to Sirius. Pomfrey said it was good that he was sleeping so much, it would help him heal. Remus was also sure she liked it simply because she could spell potions into him and do her job easier. Remus spent the day watching him, when he woke up he helped him eat a little soup. He offered to help him with the toilet but Sirius made a face and shut the door on him. At least he still had a bit of his attitude he thought with a laugh.

Pomfrey did release him, with the promise that he would be brought back every day for new potions. He took him for a short walk of the castle before he carried him to his and Severus’s quarters. Dumbledore had their quarters expanded adding a room for Sirius, Remus decided it was a nice little room, painted sky blue with a window looking out over the lake and the basics. He put Sirius down and watched him cautiously look around it when Severus entered.

“Not bad.” Severus said, waving his hand as their personal elf Dipsey helped him bring in bags. “I admit I did go a little overboard shopping.”

“You always go overboard... What did you buy?” Remus asked sighing as Dipsey put stuff away.

“Clothes, shoes with tracking charms, toys, books, the usual for a kid and something special.” Severus said, “Sirius, can you come here, I have something for you.”

Sirius walked up giving them both a cautious look, as Severus pulled a stuffed stag out from behind his back. Sirius’s eyes lit up, he reached out brushing his fingers against it. He bit his lip looking at them as Severus told him to take it. Finally he snatched it away, holding it very tight to his chest.

“I’m glad you like it.” Severus said purposely using his softest voice. “Sirius please don’t be afraid of us. We’re your friends remember.”

“Yes,” Remus agreed looking at him. “You can tell us right away if you need anything, no matter what time or day or anything.”

Sirius pursed his lips looking up at them around his bruised eye. “Where’s Reggie?”

Remus looked at Severus horrified but his husband was much more put together, he crouched down looking at Sirius. “Regulus did a bad thing. He had to go- away because of it. I’m sorry.”

Sirius looked at his stag and nodded, “So it’s true. Reggie, he hurt James and Lily. Are they dead? They told me they were.”

“I’m afraid so.” Remus said softly.

“I hate him!” Sirius yelled pushing his face into the stag as he dissolved into tears. “He’s a bad brother!”

“Oh Sirius…” Remus said as Severus picked him up. “Sirius, I know it hurts but we’re here for you.”

“Sirius, Regulus did do a bad thing. But I believe he really did love you.” Severus said patting his head. “Remus it’s getting late. I got this.”

“Are you sure?” Remus asked looking at the sobbing child.

“I’m sure. Be safe.”

Unfortunately over the next days they found that Sirius would not talk about what happened, he refused to even acknowledge it. No matter how much they pushed he wouldn’t talk. Dumbledore had even tried bribing him into talking with chocolate frogs but Sirius would simply tell them he was a good squib and then would stay quiet. When Moody tried asking it led to a crying fit, till the point that he made himself sick. At a loss of what to do, they stopped asking, figuring when Sirius was ready he would talk.

The week that followed was the worst Remus could remember, Sirius was a mess. He could not handle being alone, especially at night. So he was constantly with them. He really only accepted being alone for the bathroom. He did not like the staff, he would back away from them very quickly wide eyed. Any time he saw a wand he was flinching and cowering and at the first sign of anything ‘new’ or ‘different’ he would book it to the closest. He was also really back and forth with being touched, with them he was fine, but when Dumbledore tried touching him, oh Merlin it was borderline meltdown. However through it all he would smile shakily at them, and happily cuddle up to them, like he couldn’t get enough of being held.

*********

Sirius had decided a few things. One he did not want to talk about what happened, he just wanted to pretend he never disappeared besides good squibs don’t talk of such things. Two he hated Hogwarts, the stairs moved which was scary, it was too big so he never knew where he was and all they painting kept ohh and ahhing him. Three the teachers where a little scary but ok however they treated him like a baby, and he was not a baby. Four Severus was the best, he never questioned him when he sat on the floor instead of chairs he just sat on the floor too and he let Sirius shower alone, Remus insisted on checking on him. Not to say he didn’t like Remus, but he treated him like he was fragile. Though neither of them complained that he constantly slept on the floor, usually taking one or both of them with him for comfort.

Sirius scurried after Severus, as he led him to his classroom. “Listen Sirius, the students will be here tomorrow and you can’t stay with Remus. However you can stay with me in my classroom. So we’re going to set up a spot where you will feel safe. Alright?”

“Yes sir.” Sirius said picking at one of his scabs.

Severus sighed, “Sirius, you don’t need to call me sir.”

“But, I wanna be a good squib…” Sirius said dejected as Severus opened the door.

“You are a good boy. Now then pick any spot on this side of the room and I’ll set it up for you.” Severus said, Sirius made a beeline for the closet but Severus stood in his way. “Potions closet is off limits.”

Sirius’s eyes widened. Potions? He glanced around the room starting to shake. He looked at Severus eyes watering, he thought they said they wouldn’t hurt him. He rubbed the scars on his arms. “Please. I don’t like it!”

“Don’t like what? Potions?” Severus asked confused looking him in the eyes.

“He always hurts me.” Sirius said scrunching up his face fingers tightening into his arms.

“I see.” Severus said, nodding. “Sirius I will never ever do what that man did to you. I will never let anyone do that to you. Potions can do more than hurt, they can heal, they can make people tell the truth. I won’t take you blood, teeth or… skin. I can tell you tampered with your own memory. Who is that man?

Sirius looked at him wide eyed. He didn’t tell him that. He wasn’t supposed to tell anyone that. He was going to get in big trouble for this. No one was supposed to know he was too ashamed. He started panicking as Severus looked at him, he reached up holding his head.

“Please! Stay out of my head! I’ve been good!” Sirius cried taking a step back, maybe if he ran he could hide and they wouldn’t find him. He felt little prickles than Severus grabbed him, Sirius startled ready for the pain.

“Sirius, don’t be afraid. You aren’t in trouble. If anyone should be in trouble it’s the man that hurt you.” Severus said. “I promise, I won’t enter your mind again. Alright?”

“Yes, Sir- Severus.” Sirius said, calming down. “I don’t wanna talk about it anymore.”

Severus sighed but nodded letting him go. Sirius glanced around the room a little skeptically before discovering Severus desk. The space for his legs was covered and made a perfect little hiding spot, he climbed in and nodded approvingly. He let Severus pull him out and only flinched a little when he removed his wand.

“I put some cushioning spells on it, and a silencing charm to drown out the noise of the students.” Severus said offering to carry him, which Sirius accepted. “We’ll bring down some blankets and anything else you want ok. But you have to promise to let me teach and only interrupt if you need something.”

“Alright. Can I bring Prongs Jr.?” Sirius asked getting a nod.

“Speaking of Prongs Jr. Do you remember Lily and James’s son Harry?”

“The baby? Yeah!”

“He’s not a baby anymore. He’s eleven and he starts school tomorrow.” Severus said. Sirius paused, was he really that old. He glanced at Severus he should be his age. He laid his head on him upset. Severus rubbed his back, “What’s wrong?”

“I’m still little…”

“Yeah… I was going to work on that.” Severus said, “But it could take some time. I think I may be able to un-stunt you. Would you like that?”

“Yes please!” Sirius said eyes lighting up as he collapsed his hands together.

“Alright I’ll start working on it.” Severus said. “But Sirius, do you remember how I was a spy when I was younger.” Sirius nodded so Severus continued. “As of right now Remus and I want to keep that up incase I’m ever needed again. So we need you to not mention knowing James or Lily to Harry. Alright?”

“Yes sir.” Sirius said feeling Severus sigh.

*********

“He did what?” Remus asked palms flat on the table as he leaned over looking at Severus.

“He unconsciously altered his memories.” Severus said watching Sirius from the corner of his eye as the boy made Prongs Jr. walk along their couch where he sat. He sighed, “I believe he repressed the memories. Or at least repressed parts of it. When I tried peeking into his mind, I simply saw a faceless man. Sirius also seemed to know I was in his mind.”

“But how could he know that?” Remus asked turning to watch Sirius as well.

“I said some things he didn’t tell us and he put it together.” Severus said, spinning the whiskey in his cup. “It caused him a lot of distress when he realized what I was doing, so I promised I would never enter his mind again.”

“But how did he repress memories?” Remus asked reaching over to sip some of Severus’s drink, his husband gave him a mournful look.

“Even muggles can repress memories though not on purpose.” Severus said, “Though this is more altered, the memory was there just- changed.”

“I can’t believe this.” Remus muttered, “Should- should we talk to him about it?”

“We both know he’s not talking.” Severus said finishing his drink. “I believe he’ll tell us on his own. When he’s ready, like I did.”

Remus nodded in agreement as he walked over to Sirius looking down at him with a smile. “Come on, it’s time for the welcoming feast. Let’s get a notice me not charm on you.”

*********

Sirius was not a fan of the welcoming feast, too many people, all of which were magical. He stayed on the ground behind Severus and Remus, they had offered him a chair but he had seen Draco and his friends. He wasn’t going to fall for it, he would be a good squib and stay off the furniture. So they fed him pumpkin juice and his dinner on the floor. Once done, he tugged on Remus until he was given a small plate of sweets.

The first few weeks of class where fine, Remus and Severus would put notice me not charms on him. Severus would bring him to class early, he would go to his hiding spot and the students where none the wiser. When class was over he would join Remus in their quarters, while Severus would go work in his potions lab. Then it was back to the great hall for dinner.

“Please sit in a chair.” Remus asked again pulling a chair out for him. Sirius crossed his arms, he knew squibs shouldn’t sit in chairs but squibs also couldn’t say no to wizards. He sat down on the ground, hoping to choose the lesser of the too evils.

“Leave him be Remus.” McGonagall said, “He’ll sit when he’s ready. Won’t you dear?”

Sirius looked at her shyly from his spot on the ground. Dumbledore turned giving him a plate of food before sitting down on the floor with him. “I say quite a different view from down here. But I am curious my boy why won’t you sit in a chair?”

Sirius shrugged, “Squibs don’t deserve to use chairs or beds.”

“But you slept in a bed with Regulus.” Severus said before he seemed to figure something out.

“But Sirius, Mr. Filch uses a chair, and he’s a squib.” Dumbledore said.

“Then he’s a bad squib. I’m a good squib” Sirius said like it was obvious.

“Ahh, I see. I happen to think Mr. Filch is a good man and quiet enjoy sitting in his company.” Dumbledore said, “I also think you’re a good boy. I would be honored if you would let me sit with you for dinner.”

Sirius was taken back. Dumbledore was a powerful wizard, his mummy had even said so. Why would he want to sit on the floor with a squib like him? Dumbledore reached up taking his plate to the floor with him and starting eating like nothing was strange. Sirius was so confused, after a few seconds Remus and Severus joined them on the floor behind the head table.

“Minerva dear, would you pass the salt?” Dumbledore asked.

“Certainly Albus. Do you mind if we join you Sirius?” She asked sitting down with them, bringing Professor Flintwick and Sprout with her.

“This is nice.” Professor Sprout said. “Like a picnic.”

“Imagine what the students are saying.” Minerva laughed sipping her drink. “Sybill dear will you be joining us?”

“No,” Sybill cried grabbing Quarrel’s arm. “Seven are sitting, seven is a lucky number, but if we were to make it eight or nine. Oh! We must not speak of such a thing!”

“Suit yourself dear.” Minerva said turning back with a little shake of the head.

“Wh-why are you all doing this?” Sirius asked frustrated, he squirmed a little as they looked at him. Remus’s hand landed comfortingly on his back rubbing little circles.

“Why Sirius, we just want to enjoy your company. Nothing more.” Dumbledore said, “Now then would you like another dinner roll?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Little Sirius is safe! :') With two boss guardians to watch him.
> 
> I really enjoyed writing Dumbledore in that last scene. I feel like he is the type of character that would do something kind like this. Yes he's manipulative but he could be kind when he wanted to be.


	10. Chapter 10

Remus rubbed his face tired, last night was not a good night, Sirius had woken them up with night terrors again. He groaned it was so terrible watching him thrash and cry in his sleep, worse still there was nothing they could do about it. He glanced down at Sirius, he was pale and blinking heavily barely eating his jam smothered toast.

“Sirius are you ready to go to class?” Severus said entering the room making the boy jump.

Sirius mumbled yes struggling to his feet as he started coughing, Remus pursed his lips at this. He reached towards him wanting to feel his head but Sirius had run to Severus so he figured he was fine. Remus saw them off, Sirius waving goodbye before he himself started making his way to Hagrid’s for the day.

He was rather pleased with today, Hagrid’s and his pumpkin’s where huge, they would start carving tomorrow for Halloween. He laid on the couch resting when Severus came back looking worried holding Sirius. He noticed his pups face was flushed, he looked sweaty, eyes glazed and he was clinging to Severus tightly a wet cough breaking threw his lips. Remus stood up alarmed at this, he touched his head feeling the boy burning up.

He scooped him from his husband bee lining for the bathtub as Severus headed for their potion stores. He filled the tub and stripped him quickly, alarmed that Sirius wasn’t fighting him like usual. He plunked him in and washed him trying to cool him as he hacked away. Once done Severus came in holding a few different potions and Prongs Jr. while Remus finished dressing him in soft pajamas. He turned to grab a brush when Sirius leaned forward coughing harshly and vomited all down Remus’s front. For one coherent moment he saw the horror on his small face before the hands went up and he was screaming apologies.

“Sirius,” Remus started as Severus kindly spelled him clean. Remus reached out but Sirius was practically wailing which only made his next coughing fit worse. “Sirius stop. It’s-”

“Please don’t leave me!” Sirius screeched his whole body shaking as he cried. “I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to get sick! Don’t leave me! Don’t lock me away!”

“Sirius.” Remus tried again but he was not listening, repeating his requests over and over in between coughs. He raised his voice trying to gain his attention, “Sirius!”

He realized yelling was a mistake instantly as the boy only wailed louder trying to back away from them. “Don’t lock me away! Don’t leave me!”

Severus grabbed his shoulder practically shoving him as he squatted in front of the panicking Sirius. He reached out delicately taking one of Sirius’s hands as he continued repeating his requests. Severus rubbed his thumb over his hand speaking softly. “Sirius I’m here. I know you’re scared but it’s ok. Nobody is mad at you. We’re here. We aren’t going to leave you. Sirius you’ll be alright. We won’t lock you away. Try to breathe. Sirius it’s going to be ok.”

Severus just stayed on his knees repeating these tiny calming words, like a Sirius wasn’t having a melt down right in front of him. Remus watched carefully as he seemed to hear him, eventually he stopped turning to a slow coughing cry. Severus just kept talking, now about how Prongs Jr. was tired and probably wanted to go to bed. He gently asked if Sirius wanted to go to bed with the stuffed stag earning a nod. Severus asked if he wanted to be picked up, earning another nod.

Remus was incredibly relieved and impressed as his husband passed him taking a sniffling Sirius to bed. However he felt dreadfully useless during all of this. He sighed sadly, deciding he’d leave them be since he only had made Sirius’s panic worse. He changed his robes and showered before asking Dipsey to bring them all some chicken soup. He crept into Sirius’s room seeing them in Sirius’s floor bed.

His pup looked mostly asleep, as Severus softly read him Tales of Beedle The Bard. He smiled sadly Sirius coughed roughly jarring himself from his light sleep he saw Remus his eyes widening. Remus was ready to be rejected. Sirius rolled over grabbing the covers on the side Remus normally slept pulling them back, he looked at him expectantly. He felt frozen heart clenching happily by this small act of kindness, Sirius’s face dropped when he didn’t join them. Quickly he scurried over getting into the bed Sirius seemed pleased, Severus smirked at him reading like nothing happened.

**********

Sirius heard about the troll from Severus, and about how he caught Quarrel by a three headed dog. Sirius didn’t much care for any of this, wizard affairs where not for squibs, besides he had been sick with when it happened so he and Remus had missed it. Remus however had been upset that he wasn’t there to help. He had prattled on for days about missing the opportunity to see James’s son in action. Sirius was just happy someone had taken care of him when he was sick, no one had taken care of him since Regulus.

“Sirius,” He looked up from Prongs Jr. and the picture he was drawing from his spot tucked in the corner of their quarters as they approached him. Remus held open his arms and waited, Sirius crawled over letting him pick him up. “Come on today will be a fun day we’re going to go watch Harry play in a quidditch game.”

“Squibs aren’t allowed.” Sirius said sighing.

“Sirius, no more of that.” Remus said as they started walking to the pitch. “If you want to watch quidditch you can. You are with us now. You can do whatever you please.”

“Within reason of course.” Severus added.

Sirius leaned back looking at them, he didn’t really believe that but he stayed quiet till they sat down on the bleacher. Remus placed him between them, Sirius tried to get on the floor immediately. Severus snatched him by the upper arm, Sirius thought he was going to be scolded or hit but Severus simply spread his loose robes on the floor for him to sit on.

“If you want to come up and watch, let us know, but please stay here.” Severus said turning to watch as the game started.

Sirius sat on the floor trying to look small around the adult wizards. He heard the crowds cheering and yelling as the game went on. He started to become really curious, he stood up and started tilting this was and that to try to see just a little bit of the game. When the crowd started freaking out about Harry.

“Severus he’s going to fall! What’s wrong with his broom?” Remus asked getting no response, Sirius turned looking at Severus as the man sat there mumbling. “Counter curse, good idea love! I’m going to go down to see if I can do anything. Watch Sirius.”

Remus rushed around them and down the stars. Sirius hung on Severus’s knees watching the man focus. He found it alarming that someone would to use magic to hurt Harry. The teachers around him where moving and yelling which was very scary, he tapped Severus a few times as his heart started to race, he wanted to go up. Severus ignored him, frustrated Sirius sat on his robes on the floor again with Prongs Jr. when he saw motion behind them.

He turned around seeing a bushy haired girl tapping her wand to Severus’s robes lighting them on fire. He screamed loudly making her look at him surprised and horrified. He was yanked up into the air by Severus as he tried to stomp out his own robes. Sirius was terrified, someone had used magic to try to hurt Severus. Magic was bad he knew it! He caterwauled louder when Severus thrust him into Quarrel’s shocked hands as Severus and Minerva stomped out his robes.

“P-please take him b-back!” Quarrel stammered as Sirius screamed and kicked.

Severus quickly retrieved him and Sirius held onto him for dear life burying his face in his shoulder. He felt Severus walking shushing him but Sirius would not have it. He just kept crying as circles where rubbed on his back.

“Severus, Sirius what happened? Why do you smell like a fire?” Remus asked joining them.

“Someone lit my robes on fire for trying to save Potter.” Severus scowled, “They could have burned Sirius he was sitting on them.”

“What!? Sirius are you alright? You aren’t hurt are you?” Remus asked over his crying. Sirius was pulled back as they walked so they could see his face, he hiccupped sadly as both men checked him over. “Well he looks ok. Sirius did you see who did it?”

“A bad girl!” Sirius cried, grabbing hold of Severus’s shirt collar he pulled himself closer trying to hide. “She uses magic to hurt, she’s bad!”

“A girl?” Remus questioned as they walked inside but Sirius shut down and wouldn’t talk about it anymore so they had to let it go.

**********

Remus was tired, it was the annual meeting right before the students went home for winter break. He always found it taxing and boring listening to Minerva and Dumbledore talk about which students were staying vs leaving and the school and staff New Year’s goals. He wasn’t watching Sirius too hard, they had the doors all shut so he knew he couldn’t wander off. He glanced at him time to time but he seemed pretty content watching the fire crackle. He looked up watching Minerva as she talked, wondering what the house elves would make for dinner.

“Oh sweet Merlin! Dear no!” Pomona Sprout yelled standing.

Remus whipped around seeing Sirius happily holding Ms. Norris tightly to his chest the cats lower body dangling as she growled, Filch was running gauntly at them. Remus sprung from his chair surging towards him with Severus and the rest of the teachers, except Dumbledore. Filch had been known to hit students that touched his precious cat. Sirius was rubbing his face into Ms. Norris going ‘kitty, kitty’ surprisingly oblivious to the danger he was in.

Remus jumped over the couch in an attempt to beat Filch to him but the older man had to big a head start. He came up towering over Sirius he reached towards him quickly and Remus was sure he would strike him. He lunged forwards ready to swing at him if he had to.

“You’re holding her wrong!” Filch snapped grabbing Sirius’s arm he moved it quickly to the cats bottom supporting her back. Sirius blinked owlishly surprised at being touched, Remus and company stopped their stampede watching flabbergasted. Filch glared down at him, “And her name’s Ms. Norris not kitty.”

Sirius beamed up at him nodding going back to rubbing his face on her head. Ms. Norris for her part followed her master’s lead and went from growling to purring. Remus could have fainted he was so relieved. Filch noticed them all then, he turned scowling nastily swinging his arm. “What do you all want!? Go back to your bloody meeting.”

**********

Sirius did not like Christmas, he had tried to refuse to come out upon seeing their decorations, he shoved himself deep into his closet every chance he got. He did not want to go back to Barrick’s, so he had been on his best behavior. He even slept in a bed however he mostly ended up in his gardians. He also sat in a chair like Remus wanted, though they had it lowered so he wouldn’t have to see the large crowd of kids. He also stayed closer to Severus and Remus, but they didn’t seem to mind. When Christmas came he had been given gifts and chocolates, which was a first but he still didn’t trust that something wouldn’t happen.

However nothing did happen. The students came back and he went back to his normal schedule. He was following Remus on their way to dinner when a rather loud explosion went off making Sirius flee to hold his legs. Remus plucked him up, grabbing a girl by the shoulder at the same time.

“Please, I have to check on that. Can you take him to the great hall?” Remus asked cancelling the notice me not charm on Sirius. She nodded but Sirius’s eyes widened, it was the bad bushy haired girl. He was handed over, the girl too small to really support him clutched him desperately. “Sirius, I’ll get you as soon as I’m done.”

“Don’t leave me.” Sirius said desperately.

“Sirius I’m not leaving you. I’ll see you in a few minutes. Please be good!”

With that he took off running in the direction of the noise. Sirius stilled looking at the girl terrified while she stumbled trying to walk with him. “Umm… Hello, my name’s Hermione Granger. You’re Sirius?”

Sirius nodded at her, squirming so she dropped him. “I’m not a baby.”

“Oh alight, umm… let’s hold hands then. So you don’t get lost.” She said taking his hand and leading him. “Are you visiting the school?”

“I live here with Remus and Severus.” Sirius said before adding, “They help me stay hidden.”

“I see, that’s why we never noticed you before. It must be fun being in Hogwarts so young. You’ll certainly get a head start on your studies.” She said smiling at him, he looked at the ground lip trembling, she didn’t have to mock him. “Do you think Mr. Lupin would mind if we go to the library first? I need to exchange my books. It’s funny really we’re looking up Nicolas Flamel, he made a sorcerer’s stone.”

He looked at her confused as she brought him into the library, she returned her books still prattling on about a stone. Then she took his hand leading him towards the back of the library grabbing some new books. Once she was done she dragged him out again and down to the great hall as he silently followed her.

“Are you alright? You’re awful quiet.” She asked glancing down at him, he looked straight ahead afraid to meet her gaze. He heard her sigh. “You remember me from the quidditch game don’t you?”

He stiffened. If she would set an adult wizard on fire who knew what she’d be willing to do to a squib. He looked at her eyes watering as he tried pulling his hand back. She gave his hand a squeeze keeping it in her grasp as she looked at him. “Please don’t tell? He was trying to hurt my friend.”

“But you tried to hurt my friend!” Sirius cried frustrated, “Severus is good!”

“What? He is not good.”

“Yes he is.” Sirius countered giving his foot a stomp. “You’re a bad girl! You use magic to hurt people.”

Hermione looked at him face crinkled, he shrunk back a little. “I wouldn’t use magic to hurt someone. Did- did I hurt you? I’m so sorry if I did. I swear I didn’t know you were there, I never would have done it if I did. I only wanted to distract him from hurting Harry.”

Now Sirius was taken back. She was sorry? He cocked his head looking at her, she gave him a weak smile. “Oh, looks like you daddy’s aren’t back yet.” She said lifting him onto the bench at Gryffindor’s table.

“My daddy’s?” Sirius asked eyeing her.

“Umm… Professor Snape and Mr. Lupin.” She said simply as a red headed boy leaned into his face.

“Blimy Hermione is that the kid Snape had?” He asked spitting his food. “You weren’t joking there is a baby at Hogwarts.”

“I’m not a baby…” Sirius muttered ducking away from him annoyed before catching the eye of the second boy. “Wow, Harry you look just like James!”

Sirius slapped his hands over his mouth as Harry gave him a started look. He turned looking for a distraction as Remus approached scolding twin red heads on using dung bombs in the hallway. “There you are. Thank you so much Ms. Granger.”

“No problem sir. I’d be happy to watch him anytime.” She said as Remus picked him up.

“Oh Sirius, did you hear that. If you ever want a break from me and Severus, you can spend time with Ms. Granger.” Remus said happily lifting him up above his head he brought him down touching noses, Sirius blushed embarrassed at this.

“Excuse me, Mr. Lupin,” Harry said, “You’re son he said that I look like my dad. Did- did you know him?”

Remus pulled Sirius in giving him an awkward look before turning back to Harry sadly. “I- we did. But that was a long time ago. Now you must excuse me, Ms. Granger I will gladly take you up on that offer at a later date.”

Sirius looked down fiddling with Remus’s shirt ignoring the whispers of students as he was carried to the head table. Remus placed him in his chair silently, the man covered his mouth and wouldn’t look at him. When Severus joined he told him what happened and now Severus had a pensive look to him. Sirius stared at his plate dejectedly, eyes watering, they had asked him not to mention knowing James. He didn’t think they would hit him or use magic on him but they could change their minds. What if they got rid of him? What if they gave him back to them? He shuddered.

The trio were silent all the way back to their quarters, they did walk holding his hands so Sirius thought that might be a good sign. The second they were in their room however Sirius could see the displeasure on Severus’s face and the disappointment on Remus’s. Remus rounded on him hands raised frustrated.

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I’m a bad squib!” Sirius yelled backing away quickly, he cowered his hands coming up to protect his face. “Please! I’ll be good! Please don’t!”

“What? Sirius no.” Remus snapped making him flinch, he crouched to grab his hands holding them down. “Sirius we will never ever hurt you.”

“But- I was a bad squib.” Sirius said nervously pulling at his hands wanting to be ready to block.

“No you made a mistake.” Severus said rubbing his temples. “It’s annoying but we’ll take care of it. I need to talk to Dumbledore.”

“Let me know what he says, bye love.” Remus said as he left, he pulled Sirius up into his arms. “Listen you need to be more careful about what you say that’s all. Now let’s get you in a bath then to bed.”

“You’re really not mad?” Sirius asked poking his fingers together as he looked at Remus.

“We never were mad, just a little disappointed. Do you want to sleep with us tonight?”

**********

Remus was more than happy with the school year over. After Harry nearly killed himself fighting Quarrel and dealing with an _emotional_ Sirius he wanted to just relax. However he found he had severely under estimated adjusting Sirius to a new place. When they first arrived at their house he noticed a lot of habits they had broken came back. Sirius went back to eating on the floor, he didn’t want to sleep in a bed and the closet was once again where he spent time trying to hide when he was distressed. It felt like all the progress they had made went out the window.

However Severus was his rock and reminded him that progress could be slow. Remus remembered when Severus first moved in with Lily, she had mentioned he had questionable habits too, and even now Severus was prone to squirreling away food. So they just kept working with Sirius. When the full moon came unfortunately Remus had to do it alone, at the castle they could leave Sirius with Hermione during the day or in the infirmary for the night or with Minerva. However he was happy that Sirius would greet him at the door with Severus after his monthly ritual.

Remus kept his head in his hands watching Sirius go through their books looking at the moving pictures, when Severus came through the floo with Dumbledore and Moody. Remus perked up, “Moody, Dumbledore welcome. Well Dumbledore what do you think?”

“I think Severus did a brilliant job. I do believe it will work.” Dumbledore said, “However I caution you to hear what Alistair has to say. Before you begin the process of un-stunting Sirius.”

“Thank you Dumbledore.” Moody said as they sat at the kitchen table, his magical eye roaming the room. “There’s a reason I take stunting squibs so- personally. I had a cousin a few years older than me. He was a squib. They were horrible to him! Same idea as little Sirius. They had him convinced his name was filth. When he turned thirteen they stunted him. I realized I was getting older and older and he stayed the same.”

Remus covered his mouth he had no idea how much stunting was done. He’d never heard of it till Sirius. He took Severus’s hand squeezing it as Moody continued talking.

“When I graduated I became an auror, eventually I went back and got him away from them. But it had been years. I was so excited, I un-stunted him immediately.” Moody slammed his fist on the table, glaring hard at nothing. Dumbledore pet his shoulder as he spoke softly. “It messed with his head. Going from such a terrible environment to older and free so quickly.”

Remus swallowed looking at him. “What happened to him?”

“He’s alright now. Well as alright as he can be. Dumbledore helped me with him!” Moody said watching as Sirius came into the room proud with a wizards creature book. “I just don’t want him to end up as miserable as my cousin did. I mean- he seems happy now he has a cat and a job at Hogwarts. But still!”

“Your cousin is Mr. Filch?” Remus’s asked eyes widening as Sirius tugged on him, he reached down blindly picking him up.

“Yeah.” Moody nodded, “Got him to call himself Filch instead of filth.”

“Oh, I’m so sorry.” Remus said patting Sirius’s head making him cringe as he laid the book on the table.

“I just don’t want you too to age him up to fast.” Moody said magical eye swiveling to the book. “It messes with their heads, his could be especially bad he’s so young.”

“I recommend a mind healer to start.” Dumbledore said casting a bemused look at Sirius as he smoothed out the pages.

“Severus, what if we age him bit by bit?” Remus said as Sirius tugged his sleeve. “We could catch him up with Harry and they could grow up together. Wouldn’t that be wonderful?”

Severus nodded approval while giving the book Sirius had open a wide eyed look. Remus quickly realized the three of them where looking down rather distracted, Remus looked down too. Sirius tapped the page pointing at a moving picture of an ‘excited’ werewolf growling. Remus stuttered reaching to shut the book.

“It’s you Remus.” Sirius said innocently showing him the picture. Severus failed to hide his chuckle behind his hand, while Remus died internally.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Remus... Sirius is going to give him a heart attack if he's not careful. Haha!   
> Severus meanwhile is perfecting the un-stunting formula.   
> What do you think of Filch? I gave them common ground, he may not be out right nice to him but there's an understanding.


	11. Chapter 11

Severus had decided to spend time working to dilute the potion, they had agreed that a slower de-stunting would be better in the long run. They also agreed to look into a mind healer for Sirius at Dumbledore’s suggestion. Severus seemed to believe that hopefully by Sirius’s birthday in November they could present the potion to him as a gift. It made Remus both giddy and anxious at the idea of their pup growing. They were also hoping to get Sirius’s mind in a more stable place before they began the process.

Sirius hated the mind healer. He would scream and cry going in and he would scream and cry coming out. Remus and Severus always had to stay with him and the healer always tried to make Sirius talk about the ten year time gap. It was quiet obvious he didn’t want to talk about it. He wouldn’t talk about anything other than rant about being a good squib, not a bad squib. He worked himself up quite a few times during these meeting, till he knew Sirius was bordering a meltdown or tantrum. He could tell the mind healer was doing his best but they were at their wits end and Sirius refused to even try.

They spent the summer bouncing from mind healer to mind healer. Till one actually used a sticking charm to keep Sirius in a chair during their meeting making the boy go frantic. Remus had lost his Merlin damn mind at that healer. It came to a head when she screamed that a squib wasn’t worth her time, Sirius had gone silent at that. Remus was ready to throw punches but Severus had simply pushed him and Sirius out the door with instructions to go get brunch.

Remus watched Sirius silently push his pancake around, eyes still red and puffy. He wasn’t on the floor but he wasn’t in a chair either. Remus had gotten Sirius situated on his knee after a little coaxing. He looked up from his eggs seeing Severus pull out a chair sitting down with a sullen look.

“What happened?” Remus asked.

“I got her suspended.” Severus said calmly looking at the waffles in front of him. “Sirius are you alright?”

Sirius nodded glumly. Remus gave his husband a tight look. “I think we should give the mind healers a break for now.”

“Agreed. We’ll keep working on it together.” Severus said. “Well since we’re out want to do a little shopping?”

“That sounds nice.” Remus agreed.

They spent the next few hours going from shop to shop. They all got new clothing, getting Sirius ones with growing charms to be ready for when the time came. They also got Sirius different flavor chocolate frogs to cheer him up. They tried to take him into a toy store but Sirius had planted his feet and refused. Remus chuckled they both knew Sirius played with toys, obviously he had Prongs Jr. that he took everywhere. He was just odd about actual toy stores, so they settled on the bookstore.

It was a mad house inside, Sirius had turned to him begging to be picked up. Remus scooped him easily as he buried his face in his robes. He started collecting a large number of parenting and mental health books filling Severus’s arms with them.

“Professor, Mr. Lupin.”

Remus turned to see Ms. Granger and her parents walking up to them. “Oh hello, Ms. Granger, pleasure to see you. Sirius say hello.”

“Hi.” Sirius mumbled pulling his face free as Hermione waved at him.

“Mom, dad this is my professor and his husband and this is their son Sirius.” Hermione said smiling as Remus shook her parent’s hands. Severus gave tight smile to her parents before retreating to purchase the books.

Remus chuckled at their confused faces. “Don’t mind him. He’s not the most social guy. Right Sirius, you’re not very social either, huh?”

Sirius glared up at him muttering, “I’m social…”

“Ms. Granger I am glad I ran into you I was hoping to see if you were still willing to watch Sirius from time to time.”

“I’d love to!” Hermione said excited, “We could go to the library. It could be so much fun.”

“Thank you. That would be wonderful.” Remus said feeling a small body press into him, he glanced down seeing Sirius trying to hide his face again. He chuckled rubbing his back as he talked, “I don’t teach your daughter but my husband says she’s top of his class.”

“That’s great dear we are so proud of you- Are those two men fighting?” Mr. Granger asked. Remus looked over in time to see Arthur Weasley throwing fists with Lucius Malfoy. He was getting ready to step in when Hagrid yanked them apart. “My word! You’re world is dangerous. Who fights in a book shop?”

Remus shrugged feeling Sirius yanking on the neck of his shirt, wanting something. He glanced down seeing the terrified expression on his face as he watched Lucius. Remus’s stomach did a flip as he remembered where he had rescued his young pup from. He excused himself, weaving through the crowds till he found Severus. They left quickly after, deciding that was enough for the day.

**********

Sirius sat next to Remus watching as the man cut up his food for him. He glanced to his right at the empty chair. “Where’s Severus?”

“Probably giving Harry and his friend Ron an earful. Your dad’s good at making students cry.” Remus said handing him is plate. “Eat up.”

“You guys aren’t my parents.” Sirius simply said getting a guilty look. “I’m older then both of you.”

“Right sorry.” Remus said as Severus joined them muttering about Whomping Willows and fly cars.

**********

Sirius decided that he did not like Lockhart, the man was loud, he was touchy feely, and for the life of him he would not stop picking him up. Sirius kicked as the man swung him around in the air. “Please down! I want to go down!”

“Yes up and down!” Lockhart cheered, bringing him up and down adding little tosses here and there. “It’s like you’re flying!”

Sirius screamed in displeasure till he was snatched from the air. He clung to Severus tightly as the man leveled Lockhart with a sneer. “That’s quite enough Lockhart.”

“Oh, come now Snapey, no reason to ruin our fun. Right champ?” Lockhart said ruffling Sirius’s hair, making him flinch. “Say I know! How about you let me take the little guy to one of my classes. It would be way more fun than brewing potions.”

“No.” Severus said flatly placing Sirius on his hip as he went back to brewing. “Do you need something Lockhart? I’m rather busy working on a way to un-petrify Mrs. Norris.”

“Oh Snape you’re being so mean.” Lockhart said, “Who doesn’t want to spend some time learning to defend themselves from Cornish Pixies or curing broken bones? Oh we should make a dueling club, just you and me. This little bugger could come and learn a thing or two.”

Severus leaned into Sirius touching their foreheads together looking at him bored. He pulled back glaring at Lockhart, “I’ll help you with a dueling club. But never bring my Sirius around your Cornish Pixies. He can’t do magic.”

“Oh, you’re never too young to learn.” Lockhart said once again ruffling Sirius’s hair. He brought his hands up fixing it as Severus pointedly ignored him bending over his cauldron. Sirius raised his brows seeing Lockhart tilting his head looking at Severus in a way Sirius knew all too well. Lockhart smirked licking his lips, “Anyway dueling club. We’ll start let’s say next week.”

“Yes, fine.” Severus said, Sirius did not like the way Lockhart looked at Severus.

Sirius pulled Severus’s shirt collar getting his attention, though he gave Lockhart the side eye. “Daddy, can we go back and see Papa now?”

Severus looked shocked but Lockhart looked disgruntled. Severus stuttered before answering him, “Of course. Do you need something?”

Sirius shrugged snuggling into him deeper. “I’m tired…”

“Very well. Lockhart you’ll have to excuse me.” Severus said placing his cauldron under stasis and leaving the room.

Sirius immediately pulled back crossing his arms to look at Severus. “I don’t like him. He looks at you the way Remus does.”

“Yes I’m well aware. Remus doesn’t much like him either.” Severus said sighing. “Wait, is that why you called us daddy and papa?” Sirius blushed. “You little Slytherin! I bet you’re not even tired.”

“I am a little tired.” Sirius said holding up his fingers to show him a pinch as Severus laughed.

**********

Sirius was handed off to Hermione when Severus had to help with dueling club. Remus was much too busy helping Hagrid to watch him. She brought him to the front of the room where they would have a good view.

“Sirius, you remember my friends Harry Potter and Ronald Weasley.” She said lifting him to her hip. “Harry, Ron this is Sirius.”

“Nice to meet you Sirius.” Harry said lifting his hand, Sirius flinched back making Hermione wobble.

“What’s the matter with him?” Ron asked, “Most little kids get a real kick out of meeting Harry.”

“It’s probably because he’s a squib.” Draco sneered leaning into their group, Sirius felt his face drain. “Hello cousin, been a while. I see someone finally helped you wash that filthy hair. Was it the mudblood?”

“That’s not a nice word.” Sirius muttered.

“Are you talking back at me?” Draco snapped.

“No…” Sirius said holding Hermione eyes watering.

“No! Squibs can’t say no stupid.” Draco sneered making his horrible friends laugh.

“Leave him alone Malfoy!” Harry yelled shoving him. “He’s just a little kid!”

“No he’s not!” Draco growled, “My father says he’s a squib that got stunted. He got a real kick when I told him, the useless baby squib is at Hogwarts. Dumbledore is certainly lowering standards.”

“Stunted!” Ron said eyes narrowing. “You’re a liar, stunting is dark magic!”

“Oh yeah! Ask Professor Snape then, I dare you!” Draco snapped disappearing into the crowd as Lockhart took the stage prattling on.

“Stunting? What’s that?” Hermione whispered as Sirius squirmed trying to get down. She let him go but held his hand as Ron whispered the explanation to her and Harry. “That’s terrible! But it can’t be true, Professor Snape and Mr. Lupin wouldn’t do that.”

“Who knows?” Ron said, “Snape’s not that nice a guy and Lupin is kind of shifty.”

Sirius pulled Hermione’s arm making her turn back in time to watch Severus blast Lockhart across the platform. She winced, “Do you think he’s alright?”

“Who cares?” Harry laughed, “Listen Sirius, we won’t judge you. But is what Draco said true? Are you a squib?”

Sirius shifted from foot to foot looking at them, then to Hermione scared. When Lockhart suddenly called Harry to the stage, he sighed in relief as Hermione picked him up the conversation forgotten for now. He didn’t much care for the dueling, but when Draco made a snake and Harry hissed at it then he became curious. Severus quickly got rid of the snake but the uproar was already happening.

Hermione was one of the first to hustle out of the room with Ron and Harry. He vaguely listened to them talk about snakes and parselmouth since he was distracted looking for Severus. He tuned back in after not seeing him, Hermione was telling Harry it was a rare ability.

“Maybe it runs in my family?” Harry questioned. “I’ve always been able to talk to snakes.”

“Uh-uh.” Sirius said shaking his head at them. He felt he would have remembered if James or Lily could speak to snakes.

“Uh-uh, you mean no?” Harry asked looking at him. “That’s right you’re parents knew my parents. Maybe we could ask them?”

“No way mate, those two are strange.” Ron argued, looking at Sirius as he squirmed out of Hermione’s hold. “Besides he’s just a squib, he has no idea what he’s talking about.”

“Ronald!” Hermione scolded as Sirius froze. She wrapped her arms protectively around him as Harry whirled on his friend.

“Go away Ron.” Harry said sternly.

“But it’s true, he’s a squib isn’t he.” Ron questioned.

“Just leave him alone Ron.” Harry said reaching down to take Sirius’s hand. “We’re going to take Sirius back to his parents. We’ll see you later.”

Sirius let them lead him away holding their hands as Ron huffed. He glanced up at Harry, he really reminded him of James right now. James always so kind to him, James was always there for him. He leaned into him a little as they walked.

“I’m sorry about him.” Hermione said, “He can be a bit-”

“Of a prat?” Harry supplied, Hermione made a face but Harry continued. “He reminded me of my cousin Dudley just now, being a bully. I can’t stand bullies. Just so you know neither of us care if you are a squib.”

“Sirius!” The trio turned seeing Severus walking towards them robes flowing, he leaned down picking up the small boy. “Thank you Ms. Granger, I got a bit preoccupied after Potter’s little show.”

“It’s alright Professor.” Hermione said scuffing her shoes. “Umm… Professor?... I was wondering… Umm…”

“If you have something just say it. I don’t have all day.” Severus said moving Sirius to his hip. She stuttered over her words, a few times looking at her shoes. “Out with it!”

Sirius eventually took pity on her, “She wants to know if I’m a stunted squib. Draco told them, after he called her a… mudblood.” He whispered the last word.

“Don’t say that word it’s- not nice.” Severus said glaring at him, Sirius crossed his arms. Severus turned back to the two students patiently waiting for an answer. “What I tell you I never want to hear you two repeat, or you’ll spend the rest of the school year scrubbing cauldrons. But yes, Sirius is a squib and he is stunted. He got stunted at the age of five.”

“That’s insane.” Harry snapped, “How old is he really?”

“I’m- Severus how old are you?” Sirius asked pulling his shirt collar curious.

“You’re that old!” Harry said wide eyed.

“Merlin Potter, I’m only twenty nine.” Severus groaned, “That’s not that old.”

“I’m twenty nine.” Sirius said nodding his head proud.

“But you act like a child?” Hermione questioned.

“That’s because he is one.” Severus said sighing. “That’s what stunting does.”

“Did you know my parents?” Harry asked stepping forward.

Sirius looked at Severus expectantly but Severus waved Harry off. “I’m not getting interrogated by two children. Ms. Granger, Remus and I would like to continue your babysitting service. However, does it make you uncomfortable knowing the truth?”

Hermione paused, “He’s still a little kid. So I guess it doesn’t matter. I’ll happily keep watching him.”

**********

When more muggleborn students were attacked he knew Severus and Remus where becoming afraid. They kept Sirius with them at all times, only in rare instances was he entrusted to anyone else, Hermione included. Severus had bought him a little robe with a notice me not charm on it and they insisted he wear it everywhere combined with their own protection charms.

Sirius often heard them arguing at night about whether or not it was safe to keep him in Hogwarts. That scared him, he didn’t want to be sent away. Then there came news that Hermione was in the hospital for a botched potion, he wanted to visit her and they said no. He had thrown himself down then, crying and begging to see her. Severus had scolded him for behaving like a brat and he was brought to his room. He freaked out when the door shut, he didn’t want to be locked in.

“Please don’t lock me away!” He yelled but when he rushed to the door, it opened and he tumbled out onto the floor.

“Sirius,” Remus chided bringing him back into his room as he cried. “Sirius Black, we would never lock you away. Listen I will take you to see Hermione when she is out of the hospital but you must stop making such a racket. It’s Christmas and you’re being rather naughty.”

“Christmas!” He squeaked. He spent Christmas’s with Mr. Barrick, he covered his pelvis crying. “Please don’t send me to him! I’ll stop! I’ll be a good squib! Please don’t let him hurt me Remus!”

“What?” Remus asked as Severus joined them.

“Please no!” Sirius cried, “I’m sorry! I’ll be a good squib!”

Severus sighed, “I thought we were getting over this.”

“Sirius, no one’s going to hurt you.” Remus said putting him on the bed holding his hands rubbing his thumbs along his knuckles. “We will never send you away and we won’t let anyone hurt you. Please just talk to us. Tell us who it is.”

“I can’t, he’ll hurt you!” Sirius cried, “Please Remus don’t send me away! I’ll be a good squib!”

“Sirius he can’t hurt us.” Remus tried to reason.

Sirius shook his head eyes watering, he couldn’t do it. He just couldn’t. He felt Severus rub his head, “I understand. It took me a long time to talk about my problems too. But when you’re ready we will always be here to listen. Alright?”

Sirius calmed down, taking deep breathes he watched Remus’s thumbs rub his hands before nodding. “Alright…”

“Listen Sirius, I have something for you. A Christmas gift.” Severus said, earning a confused look from Remus. Sirius crawled up on his knees closer to him as Severus pulled out a small vile with a light blue milky liquid in it.

“Severus we agreed he wasn’t ready!” Remus said sharply worry etched on his face.

“What is it?” Sirius asked hands unconsciously covering his mouth as Severus held the potion out.

“This is a diluted potion I created to help counter your stunting.” Severus said giving it a little shake. “We agreed to give you some on your Birthday but we didn’t think you were mentally prepared to handle it.”

“I can handle it!” Sirius responded reaching for it quickly. “Please! Please! I wanna be big.”

“It’s not going to make you big. I diluted it, I have it down to the equivalent of only raising your age the slightest bit. About a year.” Severus said uncorking it, “We’re going to raise your age little by little so you can adjust accordingly. This will take a while, but it will be better in the long run. Understand?”

“Yes Severus.” Sirius said crawling onto his lap.

Sirius reached up his fingertips touching the bottom of the bottle when Remus snatched it away. “Severus please he’s not ready!”

“Remus-”

“No he’s not ready!” Remus cried walking across the room with the bottle. “Severus please! I don’t want to mess him up!”

“Remus, I’ve been thinking about it. There’s never going to be a perfect time and maybe if he grows a little he’ll understand what happened to him better and be able to talk about it. Or at least have more control over his emotions.” Severus said calmly patting Sirius’s head as he watched Remus take his chance to grow up away.

“Please Remus.” Sirius asked reaching for it. “Please don’t keep me stunted…”

“I- I don’t want to keep you stunted.” Remus argued.

“It’s just one year.” Severus said softly, “We’re going to take our time and do it right. Don’t worry. This can be like a test for a few months before deciding how to move forward.”

“Very well…” Remus said. Sirius’s eyes lit up as Remus sat down offering him the bottle, he took it greedily. “I’m sorry Sirius, I just want what’s best for you.”

Sirius gulped it down quickly he was scared Remus would take it again. He looked at them waiting to see any reaction, but nothing seemed to be happening besides getting very sleepy. His head wobbled up and down before he collapsed against Severus breathing deeply. He was so tired. He yawned closing his eyes just for a minute.

He woke up in the morning really groggy, his mouth was dry and he felt like he’d been hit by the cruciatis curse all night. He moaned rolling over to face Severus, he tapped at him quickly until the other man woke up. Severus sat up stretching before looking at him, Sirius just laid there groaning.

“I imagine it doesn’t feel good growing so much in ones sleep.” Severus said summoning their elf Dipsey asking for water and buttered toast. She gave a little bow and returned quickly handing him the requested food and drink. Severus sat him up, handing him the water. Sirius took it with shaking hands. “Good thing we sprung for clothes that would grow with you.”

“Am I really bigger?” Sirius asked around his water.

“You are.” Severus said softly wiping the water from his chin.

“Everything hurts… Where’s Remus?” Sirius asked as he devoured the toast.

“A little miffed at me. So I believe the couch.” Severus said sighing, Sirius opened his mouth to apologize but Severus cut him off. “Why don’t we show him how much you’ve grown?”

“Yeah!” Sirius said excitedly, he hoped out of bed and gasped at the pain in his legs. He was picked up, at first he wanted to argue but being carried felt so good right now. He was placed on Remus’s sleeping form earning a groan from the other man. “Remus wake up!”

Remus blinked confused his expression softened immediately seeing him. He wrapped his arms around him pulling him close. “You’re so big!”

“He’s officially physically six.” Severus said. Sirius held out his hands proudly as if showing Remus how different he looked. Remus smiled brightly at him pulling him in kissing his cheek.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor thing is still traumatized by Barrick. But he's growing up!  
> Also nothing can convince me that Lockhart wouldn't be that annoying... Because he is annoying.


	12. Chapter 12

Sirius was incredibly disappointed to learn that being six wasn’t that different from five. He was still treated like a baby, he was still carried, picked up and he still had a babysitter. He crossed his arms watching Hermione do homework, he didn’t think this was very fun. He would normally be with Severus but after Neville had melted a potion in class and burned his hands he was sent with Hermione while Severus dismissed class early and did damage control.

“What’s wrong Sirius you seem down?” She asked looking up from her potions essay.

“No one’s noticed I’m six now…”

“What do you mean?” She asked crinkling her nose.

“Severus gave me a potion to help me start un-stunting.” Sirius said more to Prongs Jr. then her.

“That’s wonderful! Sirius I’m so happy for you. You know I thought you looked taller.”

“Really?” He asked looking up excited as she nodded.

“Absolutely.” She said booping his nose. “Now then, can you color or read while I finish my potions essay?”

“Severus isn’t going to like your essay.” Sirius said tapping her long parchment. “Says you write too much.”

“Well how else will he know I understand it?” She said looking at him expectantly.

Sirius shrugged, “He says you’re a know it all. Just write what he asks, you’ll get a better grade and I’ll get a chocolate frog.”

Hermione looked up, “Why would you get a chocolate frog if I write less? Wait, did Professor Snape ask you to tell me to write less in exchange of sweets?”

Sirius pursed his lips, Severus had told him to deny it if she asked but he didn’t know what deny meant. “What’s deny?”

“Deny means to refuse to admit the truth.”

“Then no he didn’t.” He said turning back to his drawing. Hermione gave him a long look before scratching out parts of her essay.

**********

Remus rubbed his brows an emergency meeting had been called he sat next to Severus at the table with Sirius drawing between them. He couldn’t believe wat he was hearing a ghost and another student petrified. It was insanity.

“The mandrakes aren’t ready.” Professor Sprout said sadly, “They just aren’t in season.”

“Indeed, I tried ordering ones from even distant suppliers but have had no luck.” Severus said lacing his fingers together.

“And we’ve had no luck finding the chamber of secrets.” Minerva said, “Not even the house elves know where it lies.”

“Shame, I feel as though I might have some good leads though. I won’t get your hopes up until I explore them thoroughly.” Lockhart said nibbling on some chocolates, Remus rolled his eyes. “Snape your head of Slytherin you must have an idea. The heir of Slytherin will likely be from your house after all. We should meet privately and talk.”

“Sorry I only have a house of _children_ scared that they or their friends could be attacked.” Severus said coldly he smoothed Sirius’s hair clearly showing his disinterest in the conversation. Lockhart turned in his seat wrapping an arm around the back of Severus’s chair, Remus cursed that he let the man sit by his husband.

“Now Snapey I was thinking we could chat anyways. I have been known to be very perceptive I might notice something you didn’t.” He said flipping his hair back smirking at him. Remus bristled at this, he noticed surprisingly that Sirius too was giving him the stink eye.

“Doubtful. Now kindly remove your hand from my chair.” He said grunting as Sirius climbed onto his lap pulling his pictures with him, making Lockhart recoil.

“Yes Lockhart let’s stay focused.” Minerva said from Remus’s right as she continued talking about student safety.

“Fine, fine. I’m just trying to save our students. Chocolate?” Lockhart asked holding out his box of sweets. Remus glared at him, if he ever suspected a love potion it would be now. Sirius the chocoholic however reached out quickly popping one in his mouth.

They both tensed watching him alarmed while Lockhart smiled pleased. Sirius’s face contorted he spit the candy out into his hand disgusted. He held it there unsure what to do Sirius looked at Lockhart, “It’s bad. It has mint in it.”

Remus relaxed banished the candy and the meeting went on as normal. Once done they collected Sirius and his things, he was holding his hand while Severus went through the drawings. Back at their quarters he’s was going to send Sirius off to shower when Severus grabbed him bring him to the couch.

“Can you tell me about these?” He asked kindly as they sat down with Sirius in the middle. He nodded eagerly taking them.

“That’s us.” Sirius said showing them a crude drawing with smiling faces, before flipping to a new one. “And this is me and Hermione, I want to give it to her next time she’s over.” He placed them on his lap showing a new one. Remus cocked his head it had three people smiling standing over a small black hair figure frowning on the ground. Sirius tried to flip past it but Remus grabbed it gently.

“What about this one?” He said softly.

“That’s me.” Sirius said pointing, “And that’s Draco and his friends. They liked to chase me down and hurt me. I don’t like that picture.”

He ripped it rather quickly tossing it past their feet as he showed them a new one. A black haired figure was in a box with a big lock on it looking sad, while two other figures smiled on the outside. He read the labels of ‘mummy’ and ‘daddy’ before Sirius was ripping that one up too calling it a ‘bad picture’. However he seemed really excited about the last one. He showed it to them pleased.

Remus cleared his throat concerned at the blonde dead body and the monster that had killed it. Sirius looked up brightly, “That’s you Remus. You ate Lockhart.”

“Sirius, I wouldn’t eat Lockhart.”

“I’m hanging that.” Severus said bemused.

**********

Sirius ran to the door trying to reach the lock when Remus came up chuckling gently helping him open it letting Hermione in, she walked up to Sirius taking his hand. He smiled at her before sending a scowl at Severus and Remus as they got ready. He knew tonight was a full moon and he knew it was going to rise in the day. That’s why he was with Hermione but it still frustrated him to no end, he wanted to go with them but they had said no.

“Hermione, we’re going to be out late.” Remus said as Severus pointedly looked away. “Minerva is busy with quidditch and meetings till eight tonight but once she’s free please drop him with her. And if you need anything get Pomfrey or Dumbledore immediately or any teacher.”

“Yes Mr. Lupin.” Hermione said, swinging their joined hands.

“Except Lockhart. Keep him away from that nimrod.” Severus said sharply.

“Not a problem Professor.” Hermione said glancing down at Sirius. “We’ll probably just go to the library, maybe catch the quidditch game, and then spend the rest of the evening in the Gryffindor common room.”

“That sounds lovely.” Remus said approvingly. “Sirius can we get hugs goodbye?” Sirius sighed but ran giving them hugs all the same. “Here don’t forget Prongs Jr. or you won’t sleep a wink.”

Sirius quickly grabbed Prongs Jr. holding him tight to his chest he returned to Hermione and tried to ignore her hand. However she reached out to take his anyway pulling him along as she waved goodbye. Sirius sighed following her out of the dungeons and up the stairs, he clung tight to her when they jerked under them.

“Oh no. Stairs take us back!” Hermione ordered pouting. “Oh well, long way to the library it is. Sirius are you ok? You’re quieter than normal.”

“I wanted to go with Severus and Remus but they said I couldn’t. They are babying me. I’m not a baby I’m six! …Or thirty… I don’t know…” He said confused by his own age.

“Oh that’s alright. It just means they care.” She said simply. “I’m thirteen but sometimes my parents baby me.”

“Really?” He asked looking up as she nodded. She led him into the library where she gathered her materials. He climbed up onto his knees leaning over to watch her work. “What are you working on?”

“Just trying to figure out what the Chamber of Secrets is and why people are being petrified.” She said giving him a gentle smile.

“Yeah, Severus and Remus are worried about that too. They think I could get attacked being a squib and all.” He said making his stag walk across the table. “When they were younger they ran all over the school with- their friends finding secrets.”

“Did they ever find the chamber of secrets?” She asked glancing up from her book.

“I don’t think so.” He said putting Prongs Jr. down watching her work. “I’m bored… Can I color?”

“Of course.” She handed him his crayons and parchment. He busied himself drawing a stag, rat, fox and a werewolf. He started to add a dog when he froze, he huffed sadly looking at the start of his brother’s animagi form. He ripped up the paper surprising Hermione. “Sirius, your nice drawing.”

“I messed it up.” He said pushing the coloring supplies away. “I don’t wanna draw anymore.”

“Here. They don’t exactly have kids book but this is a book on creatures. It should have some good pictures.” She said handing it over, he swung his feet flipping through the pages. She cleaned up his mess and went back to her own work. He paused poking a blank picture waiting but nothing happened.

“Hermione, look.” He said showing her.

“Oh I don’t like that one, it’s scary.” She said shuddering, “It’s called a Dementor.”

Sirius pulled the book back looking again. “I don’t see anything.”

Hermione leaned over him skimming the page as Sirius read along slowly. “It’s says here muggles and squibs can’t see them. Sorry.”

“I hate being a squib.” Sirius groaned flipping through the book as Hermione gave him a sad look.

“It’s getting late want to go watch the quidditch game?” She asked.

He shook his head picking up Prongs Jr. showing him a picture of merfolk. They sat in relative silence, Sirius showing her pictures once in a while. He flipped over the book when he found a page with no picture. He shoved it over to Hermione, startling her. “Look no picture.”

She smiled leaning over, “Basilisk, no photo can be taken of this creature do to its terrifying gaze that can kill or- petrify… Sirius let me see that book.”

Sirius let it go watching her flip through it like mad. He yawned glancing out the window seeing the moon getting higher. He wished he could go with Remus and Severus instead of being here. He turned hearing a ripping noise as Hermione pulled a page from the book slamming it shut.

“That’s bad.” He said pointing at the book.

“Come on Sirius we have to go!” She said pulling him to his feet. “The monster in the chamber of secrets it’s a basilisk. We need to tell someone straight away!”

“But Basilisks are big, how come we haven’t seen it?” Sirius asked holding Prongs Jr. tight.

“Moaning Myrtle… The toilets!” Hermione yelled flipping the page over scribbling furiously.

“There’s a snake in the potty?” Sirius asked as she transfigured her quill into a hand mirror.

“I need you to close your eyes Sirius.” She said hoisting him up. “Do not open them no matter what. Understand?”

He nodded, closing his eyes. He felt her walking very slowly through the castle. He didn’t like this, he didn’t like not being able to see. He didn’t like that there was a monster that wanted to kill them. He started shaking, crushing Prongs Jr. into his face. “Hermione I’m scared.”

“I know. I am too.” She said, walking. “You know my mother always told me if you’re scared of something you should read about it then it won’t be so scary. I guess she never had to deal with a basilisk though.”

“Is that why you read so much? Because you’re scared?” Sirius asked hearing a sliding noise.

“Kind of. I’m afraid someday someone will be in trouble and I won’t know how to help them.” She answered, he felt her body lean and heart beat pick up.

“Maybe I’ll read more.” Sirius mumbled hearing Hermione’s breath hitch as she squeezed him. “Hermione?”

He gave her a little shake but she didn’t move. He pulled back poking her blindly as he heard something coming towards them. He shoved her again and again but she didn’t move he started to panic. He tried turning and squirming but she had him in a death grip. He promised her he wouldn’t open his eyes but he was really scared. He started crying as something came closer and closer to them.

“Hermione! Hermione move!” He cried, struggling more he felt her tip, he screamed opening his eyes as she fell backwards with him landing face down in her arms. Her mirror clattered above his head, he turned his head looking at it seeing something big and scaly in the mirror. He froze holding Hermione tight.

**********

Remus and Severus where sore and tired as they struggled up to the castle. They barely stepped foot into Minerva’s quarters when they knew something was wrong. They rushed down to the hospital wing, seeing Hermione laying petrified on a bed with a lump in her arms. Weasley and Harry sitting with her, they sprinted over as Harry turned to them.

“Professor Snape, Mr. Lupin.” Harry said through puffy eyes. “Hermione and Sirius they were attacked sirs. They’re petrified.”

Remus sunk to the floor, as Severus stepped around him, inspecting Hermione and Sirius. A hand landed on his shoulder making him jump as Pomfrey looked at him sadly. “They’re holding each other so tight, I’m afraid I’d hurt them if we tried to separate them.”

What followed where the worst three weeks of Remus’s life. Severus and him where in misery. Everything felt like a numb blur. He constantly found himself sitting next to their petrified forms. He felt so useless, he would just watch them and read his parenting books. Sometimes he brought children’s stories, he had read through Beauty and the Beast. He thought Hermione would make a good Belle very bookish, Sirius however was clearly Peter Pan. For some strange reason he pictured Lucius as Hook, probably because he saved him from there.

However in time Harry managed to defeat a freaking basilisk. Severus was able to cure the students and Sirius once the mandrakes where ready. On an extra note Lockhart was hospitalized for memory problems but Remus would not miss him.

He held a dozing Sirius tight as he packed to go home for the school year. Remus was honestly considering leaving Hogwarts for good. Severus was less sure of leaving, but was still unhappy all the same. There was a knock on their chambers, Remus called to enter letting Dumbledore walked in.

“I’m glad I caught you before you left.” He said smiling at them. “Remus I’d like to offer you the position of Defense Against the Dark Arts Professor.”

“Me?” He said glancing at Severus. “What about Severus?”

“He’s my finest potions instructor.” Dumbledore said ignoring the way Severus slammed his suitcase a little tighter. “What do you say my boy?”

“Well… the pay raise would be nice. And I could spend more time with Sirius.” He said rubbing his face in Sirius’s hair. “I suppose I’ll take it.”

“Splendid, splendid!” Dumbledore said clapping his hands. “Now about Sirius-”

“What about him?” Severus asked joining them arms crossed. “He’s staying with us.”

“Of course my boy.” Dumbledore said. “I was merely wondering if you would keep chipping away at his stunted state.”

“Well he’s six now and had no ill effects. I was going to give him another dose at the beginning of summer.” Severus said tucking Sirius’s hair from his face. “Then probably another at the end.”

“So one dose every two months.” Dumbledore said nodding. “How old will you age him?”

“We decided he should grow up with Harry.” Remus said. “We did the math. If we give him one dose every two months, by the end of the next year he’ll be thirteen-fourteen. Then we’ll switch it and give him a dose once a year on his birthday.”

“That sounds like a good plan. And for his education?” He asked.

Severus sneered, “We’re teachers. I’m not worried.”

**********

Un-stunting Sirius to seven was, in Remus’s personal opinion going to be the death of him. It was like a switch had flipped and the boy became wild. As a running tally he had fallen out of at least three trees, skinned his knees to scaring and on one occasion fell down the stairs trying to slide down the banister. It was like he had endless energy to burn, Remus wished he had that kind of energy. He looked up seeing Sirius trying to master doing hand stands, he crashed to the ground once again but seemed very determined. Why couldn’t he put that much effort into learning Remus wondered, at least he was a good reader.

Remus was pleased Sirius seemed so happy but he still saw him flinch when they used their wands or the way he would press into them and hold their hands in big crowds. Of course the constant apologizing hadn’t stopped either, or calling himself a ‘bad squib’ but they were now happening, at least he thought, a little less. Remus was also starting to miss having his husband and bed to himself, they kept putting Sirius to bed in his room but every morning he was back sandwiched between them.

They had tried again with a mind healer, it wasn’t going well. Sirius seemed convinced that they were trying to make him go because he was bad. When they told him that wasn’t why he was going, he then insisted a squib wasn’t worth a mind healer’s time parroting the woman from last year. They did get him in but he would sit there sullenly and refuse to talk, so it usually meant Remus and Severus would sit there listening to advice. About the only thing they could get him to do was draw pictures, which the mind healer had him sort into ‘happy’ and ‘sad’ piles. Any attempts to talk about the pictures where met with curt explanations and silence.

Remus looked at Sirius bemused as he balanced on his hands a moment attempting to walk before crashing down. He was determined it seemed since he rolled back and tried again. Remus liked him better like this, he was so miserable during therapy but watching him in the yard playing and getting his energy out was wonderful. In some ways Sirius was coming out of his shell, in others well they were still working on social skills. Remus watched him crash down once again before deciding enough was enough, his poor back already had enough scars besides lunch was probably ready.

“Sirius, how about you stop that and come over here.” Remus called. Sirius rolled over looking at him before nodding, he came over climbing up into Remus’s arms. That was another thing, Sirius didn’t really seem to notice how big he was getting. Remus shrugged it off he had been five for well over twenty-five years, he was confident the habit would break on its own. Besides he could lift a seven year old, he was more worried about when they made him eight. Though a gentle push might not hurt he thought, “Sirius, I might not be able to carry you much longer. You’re getting so big.”

Sirius leaned back glaring at him making Remus stumble to hold him. He chuckled as he entered their little house seeing Severus holding the Daily Prophet a picture of the Weasley family vacation in Egypt on the front cover. Severus looked over his paper at the two of them cocking a brow. “You’re filthy.”

Remus felt Sirius tense up, he feared an apologetic rant so he cut him off. “He’s right, you’re covered in dirt. Go wash up and I’ll take you for a broom ride after lunch.”

Sirius looked at him, he was worried for a split second that he was going to prattle on about being a squib and therefore shouldn’t ride a broom but instead he struggled free and ran from the room. Remus sat down sighing holding his back as Severus snorted. “You need to stop carrying him. You’ll hurt yourself.”

“But he’s so cute and that boy needs the love. Besides he’s having trouble realizing how big he is.” Remus said rubbing his face. “Maybe we could hold off giving him his next de-stunter?”

“No Remus you need to let him grow up.” Severus said standing, he waved his wand setting the table as Sirius returned, hands and face scrubbed clean. Remus smiled at him standing to grab the drinks and food. When he turned back Sirius was staring at Severus with his hands up. “No, Sirius you’re getting too big.”

Sirius looked confused at this, they’d never denied picking him up. He just made a face and kept standing there hands up waiting, Severus stared back at him arms crossed. Remus really wanted to run over and pick him up but he knew Severus was right. He turned his back setting the food and drinks out. He glanced up seeing Severus sit in the chair, Sirius smugly on his lap.

“Not a word Remus.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hermione is the best babysitter! She tried so hard to protect him.  
> I read some articles on children's therapy and drawings are a way lots of children can express themselves about things that happened that they don't fully understand. So i figured that seemed like a good approach.


	13. Chapter 13

Sirius was eight and that was really exciting to him however it was tarnished fast as Severus and Remus showed him the wanted poster of his own brother. Regulus Black turned this way and that screaming silently but no less menacingly. His heart clenched seeing it, Regulus was always so good and loving.

“Reggie…” He whispered holding Prongs Jr. close.

“Yes Reggie.” Severus said tapping the page. “He escaped.”

“Sirius, I know he’s your brother,” Remus started. “But he’s not a good man and you must stay away from him. And you have to tell us immediately if you see him.”

“You should also refrain from mentioning that he’s your brother.” Severus said, “If someone asks you about him just pretend not to know anything. Understand?”

“Yes Severus.” Sirius agreed nodding sadly. He watched his brother yelled madly in his picture, he still loved him but he also hated him for what he did.

When Remus told them that he was going to ride the train to protect Harry, Sirius begged to go. Neither of his guardians where sure at first, Remus even said he wouldn’t be able to watch him but he wanted to ride the train so badly. He was determined even stating that he would stay with Hermione the whole time. At last Remus and Severus had agreed but only if Hermione was willing. He and Remus got to the station early and upon spotting Hermione Sirius threw himself at her.

“Hermione!” He called wrapping his arms around her torso burying his face in her stomach. “Look how big I am! I’m eight now!”

“S-Sirius?” She asked as he nodded pleased. “Wow you really are big. Umm… What are you doing here?”

“Remus said I could ride the train as long as you agreed to watch me! Isn’t that great?” He asked giving her space. “I’ve always wanted to ride the train!”

Sirius was so excited he missed Remus mouthing ‘sorry’ and ‘please’ to Hermione, Sirius looked at her expectantly. She gave him a gentle smile, taking his hand. “Alright, let’s go ride the train.”

“Err… Hermione.” Remus said looking at her. “He’s bigger now but is still a little- confused on what’s appropriate for his age. If you know what I mean. We’ve tried talking to him but he’s not getting it.”

Sirius gave him a confused look tugging her hand. “Come on, come on. Remus gave me money for chocolate frogs.”

“Don’t worry Mr. Lupin, we’ll be fine.” She said letting Sirius tug her.

“He’s a professor now.” Sirius explained as they found a compartment. She nodded at him as they sat down with Sirius by the window. A few minutes later the train pulled away and Harry and Ron joined them.

“Hermione, who’s he?” Ron asked pointing at Sirius.

“Sirius?” Harry asked sitting down, Sirius nodded.

“I’m eight now! Severus is un-stunting me.” He said proudly.

“So you are a stunted squib.” Ron said tapping his chin. “Are you even allowed on the train?”

Sirius’s eyes dropped to look at his feet shoulders sagging as Hermione started berating the red head. He felt a hand on his shoulder, he glanced up through his lashes at Harry. “Don’t listen to him. I’m glad you’re riding with us.”

Sirius smiled at him, he was so much like James, he really missed him. He listened to them talk about this and that, till the topic changed to Regulus Black. He pulled himself up into a little ball in the corner trying to ignore them.

“Hey Sirius?” He looked over at Harry. “You’ve been around a while, do you know Regulus Black?”

Been around a while, that’s one way to put it he thought sitting up. He shook his head no. Harry nodded sullenly as the lights went out and train jolted to a stop, throwing Sirius from his bench. Harry caught him before he hit the floor, Sirius immediately turned around climbing into his lap for safety. Harry seemed a bit stunned but let it go as Ron scowled at him.

“Aren’t you a little old for that?” Ron asked, “And why’d the train stop?”

“Old for what?” Sirius asked wrapping his arms around Harry. “I don’t like this it’s dark. Harry what’s going on?”

“I don’t know.” Harry said wrapping his arms around him comfortingly as Ron moved to the window.

“There’s something moving out there.” Ron whispered watching the window iced over.

“I want Remus.” Sirius said hiding his face in Harry’s chest, as the other patted him.

“It’s alright,” Hermione said softly.

He felt Harry stiffen, he leaned back looking at him, his eyes were glued to the door. He followed his gaze but saw nothing, he glanced at Hermione and Ron they too looked horrified. He pulled on Harry’s collar trying to get his attention but was moved behind him protectively as the door opened on its own. He hugged himself from the cold, he felt really lonely all of a sudden like he did when Regulus would leave for school and he knew no one would protect him. He felt Harry’s weight laying on him and Hermione yelling.

A sliver misty fox ran into the room, making Sirius feel a thousand times better. He sat up watching Remus’s patronus bounce around before disappearing as the man himself appeared. Sirius ran to him confused by what happened, he put his arms up as he started to cry. “Remus!”

“It’s alright Sirius. I’m here.” He said crouching to give him a hug. Sirius however used this as an opportunity to jump wrapping his arms and legs around him forcing Remus to grunt and carry him. Remus sighed walking over to a shaken Harry, he pulled out a chocolate bar. “Here eat this. It will help.”

“What was that?” Harry asked taking the bar gingerly.

“Dementor, nasty things. They’re looking for Regulus Black.” Remus said.

“But I didn’t see anything!” Sirius cried.

“Of course not love.” Remus said, kissing his cheek as he calmed down. “Dementors cannot be seen by muggles and squibs. I need to have a word with the driver, why don’t you come with me.” Remus said as he lowered him trying to get him to release his tight hold of him. “How about you walk?”

“I want to stay with Harry.” Sirius said softly letting Remus put him down.

“I think Harry and his friends might want time to themselves.” Remus said as Ron nodded approval.

“Sirius I’m alright.” Harry said, “I think Remus want’s you with him. We can spend time together at Hogwarts. Alright?”

“Ok, bye Harry, bye Hermione.” Sirius said waving as Remus took his hand leading him out of the compartment.

**********

Sirius liked having his choice of classrooms now, he wasn’t just stuck in potions with Severus all day. Plus he no longer fit under Severus’s desk so his hiding spot was ruined. He spent a few days just sitting in Severus’s desk reading but Severus deemed him a distraction to the students and he was sent to Remus’s classroom instead. He knew he was distracting the students there too but couldn’t help it, he honestly wasn’t doing anything.

He was tucked in a little corner reading books on herbology when Remus started talking about boggarts. He felt his stomach start twisting up thinking of the boggart room at Grimmauld Place. He did not like boggarts and did not want to be around a boggart. He jumped up running to Remus he pulled on his robes making him glance down as he talked.

“Just keep practicing the spell students. What is it Sirius?” He asked looking at him.

“I don’t want to see a boggart again. Can I go to Severus?” He pleaded.

“Again? When did you ever see a boggart?” Remus asked concerned.

“Mum used to lock me in with one when I was a bad squib.” Sirius said simply with a shrug. “Please can I go to Severus? I know the way on my own, please.”

“Afraid not love, people can get really hurt if they make a mistake in Severus’s classroom. Potions accidents can be quiet serious.” He said taking his hand to lead him to his corner.

“Please Remus!” Sirius begged eyes watering. “I don’t want to see him again.”

“Who?” Remus asked taking his hands rubbing them.

“Reggie, it’s always Reggie.” He said shaking, “He’s never breathing, and sometimes he’s cut up really bad.”

“I see.” Remus said nodding. “Listen, you don’t have to see your boggart. Other people will be closer so it will go after them. I promise though you might find it fun this time. If you want you can stand with Hermione and if you really don’t like it, I’ll stop class early for you. Deal?”

Sirius reluctantly agreed as Remus smiled starting some music. He stood a little ways off with Hermione as she held is hand comfortingly. He did find it kind of fun, but he stayed very far away from the boggart, just in case. He nearly gagged seeing Neville Longbottom’s boggart of Severus. Honestly Severus was strict but Sirius knew he was a softy on the inside. However seeing ‘Severus’ in a dress and hat had him in tears.

“S-sorry sir.” Neville said unable to meet Remus’s eyes.

“Its fine, Mr. Longbottom my husband can be- prickly.” Remus chuckled. “Keep it going who’s next!?”

Sirius stood with Harry when it was Hermione’s turn. He watched Hermione get attacked by Minerva yelling about her grades, Ron fight a spider and a few other funny ones. He pulled Hermione’s hand excited when Harry approached, he racked his brain remembering James’s mentioning his boggart being his friends dead. He knew Severus’s was his father Tobias, Remus was the moon and Regulus’s had been something called an inferi. He blanched thinking of his brother, he shook the thoughts away watching the boggart swirl around and disappear. Remus quickly threw himself in the way making it reappear as a moon, before he sent it back to the dresser.

“That’s enough for today, class dismissed.” He said, waving his hand as the students groaned.

Sirius scrambled away from Hermione running to Harry as Harry approached Remus. He barreled into him wrapping his arms around him stopping him, “Harry you’re so brave! You don’t have a boggart, it just disappeared when it saw you!”

“Sorry Sirius, I’m not that brave it was a dementor.” Harry said smiling down at him sadly. “Professor why did you jump in front of me?”

“To be honest Harry, I feared it would turn into Lord Voldemort.” He said shaking his head, “I didn’t want to start a panic.”

“I understand sir.” Harry nodded. “Bye Sirius, I’ll see you later.”

“Were are you going? Can I come?” Sirius asked holding on tighter as Harry tried to walk away.

“Just to the great hall to eat.” Harry said awkwardly trying to detangle himself from Sirius.

“Sirius, let him alone.” Remus chided unhooking his small arms from Harry. “He wants to go be with his friends. You’ll see him again tomorrow.”

Sirius sighed looking down waving goodbye as Harry left. He looked at Remus taking his hand for comfort, “He doesn’t like me.”

“Don’t be silly. He likes you just fine. You’re just a bit too young to be friends, that’s all.” Remus said.

“But we were friends and I was five.” Sirius countered, “It’s probably because I’m a squib.”

“Sirius it’s not because you’re a squib.” Remus sighed, “Too be honest, I- I never really saw you as a friend, the way I did James or Peter. You where more like a little brother to our group.”

Sirius stopped in his tracks looking at him horrified, “You aren’t my friend?”

“No- no! I am your friend but it’s different when you’re younger.” Remus said stuttering over his words. “You were still my friend even back then it’s just I saw you as- well.”

“A baby.” Sirius finished pulling his hand away.

“Sirius, I don’t see you as a baby.” Remus said smiling at him. “You are my dear friend. Severus and I are going to take care of you.”

Sirius looked down, “You shouldn’t have to take care of me. I should be your age.”

**********

Sirius was thrilled when he got his next potion early, nine, just in time for Halloween. However just like eight, Regulus ruined it by attacking the fat ladies portrait. He was shuffled with the rest of the students to the great hall for the night. Girls on one side boys on the other while teachers guarded them and doing rounds. At first he’d gone over fulling intending to sleep next to Hermione, but Remus had grabbed him back. Stating he was getting to old and it was inappropriate to sleep next to Hermione and on the girl’s side. Severus just shrugged, at this.

Remus scowled, “You don’t think it’s inappropriate?”

“I literally shared a bed with Lily during sleepovers.” Severus said. “Till we were twelve, then her parents put a stop to it.”

“Still…” Remus said, “Why don’t we see if Harry will let you sleep by him?”

“Will he make fun of Prongs Jr.?” He asked as Remus led him away.

“Of course not Harry is a nice lad. I’m hopping when you get older you two will become good mates.” Remus said, he cleared his throat by Harry and Ron getting their attention. “Sorry to bother you boys but can Sirius sleep with you?”

Ron opened his mouth looking like he would protest but Harry cut him off, “Sure Sirius, you can lay right here next to me.”

Harry reached over taking his blanket and setting him up, while Sirius looked at Remus. “Ok you can go now. I’ll be good, bye Remus.”

He sat down as Remus walked away chuckling. Ron looked at him scowling, “Why are you sleeping in here?”

“Same reason you are.” Sirius said. “Plus Remus said I couldn’t sleep with Hermione.”

“Ugh. Of course you can’t sleep with Mione. She’s a _girl_ , and you’re a boy.” Ron groaned.

Sirius looked down as Harry laughed, “Don’t worry it’s more fun on the boys side. Lay down lets go to sleep.”

Sirius did go to sleep for maybe an hour, before he woke up heart racing. He had a nightmare that Barrick was touching him again, he gulped down the fear, whipping his eyes. If he didn’t think about it, it didn’t happen. Normally he would climb in bed with Severus and Remus but they weren’t here. He sat up panicking a little, when he saw Harry asleep, he looked like James. James use to let him sleep in his bed when he had bad dreams. He crawled over with Prongs Jr. poking Harry’s face.

“Harry. Harry.” He whispered, Harry cracked open one eye half asleep.

“Sirius wha- what’s wrong?” He yawned.

“I had a bad dream. Can I sleep with you?” Sirius asked afraid to be rejected.

Harry blinked at him before smiling softly eyes drifting shut. “Sure get in.”

“Thanks Harry.” Sirius whispered happily climbing in with him. James used to let him cuddle with him when he was scared, he glanced at Harry. Gingerly he wrapped his arms around him wanting the comfort. He felt a sleepy arm grab him back pulling him in like a teddy bear, yeah just like James he thought closing his eyes.

After that night he had taken to trying to cling to Harry and was constantly being removed by Severus and Remus. However Harry and Hermione didn’t seem to mind and would often let him tag along with them. They showed him the work they had been doing on a case for Hagrid’s hippogriff Buckbeak. Harry also made him promise not to tell anyone before showing him the Marauder’s map. Sirius froze tracing his fingers over the names, Moony, Fennec, Wormtail, Prongs, Snuffles and Padfoot. He smiled seeing his nickname, how nice he wondered if James or Regulus added it.

“Strange names huh?” Harry said, unfolding it showing off the moving dots on the page. Sirius leaned in pointing at the names of people he recognized. “I think this will help me. Between us, I’m going to hunt down Regulus Black and kill him.”

Sirius looked up horrified, he knew Regulus did a bad thing but he didn’t want him hurt. “You should stay away from him he’s dangerous.”

Harry shook his head. “No I’m going to kill him for betraying my parents.”

Sirius looked at the map alarmed seeing his dot mixed with theirs proudly displaying ‘Sirius Black’. He didn’t want them to see his name, he didn’t want them to know. They weren’t supposed to know. He looked up at them pulling Harry’s sleeve, “I’m hungry, let’s go eat!”

Harry closed the map nodding. “Sounds good.”

**********

Sirius hated Christmas so Severus and Remus only celebrated it carefully with him. However Harry and Hermione had let him sit with them and Ron at the Christmas feast. He was ecstatic, and a little sore from his un-stunting the day before but he was ten.

“We get it you’re ten now.” Ron snarked, “Really, good for you.”

Sirius sat back taking a deep calming breath. “Well I think it’s cool, seeing as I never thought I would grow this old.”

“Aren’t you like actually thirty?” Ron said raising an eyebrow.

Sirius paled as Hermione smacked Ron’s arm across the table. “Leave him alone.”

“Its fine Sirius I’m happy for you.” Harry said pulling out a broom. “Look at this someone sent me a new broom. It’s a firebolt!”

“Harry, that’s dangerous.” Hermione scolded, “What if Regulus Black sent it? What if it’s a way to harm you?”

“No it’s not.” Ron argued, “Harry got the greatest gift ever.”

“We should tell a teacher.” Hermione said. “We don’t know who sent it.”

“I agree with Hermione.” Sirius said poking the broom.

“Of course you do.” Ron said rolling his eyes.

“Hey mudblood!” Draco hissed, “Heard you were making a defense for that oaf’s bird. Are you using the squib to help you?”

“Beat it Malfoy!” Harry snapped.

“My father said he’s going to have that bird’s head for what it did to me.” Draco sneered, he looked at Sirius who averted his eyes. He leaned in quickly whispering, “Mr. Barrick says he misses you.”

Sirius’s eyes widened he jerked in his seat, scrambling up and into Hermione’s lap. He wrapped his arms around her clinging tightly shaking and trying to hide his face as both Harry and Ron threatened the blonde. Draco just laughed giving a little wave. Sirius was terrified, he was crying now which was embarrassing. He thought he was bigger. He thought he wouldn’t be scared.

“I don’t want to go! I’m a good squib!” Sirius cried into Hermione’s shoulder even he knew he was panicking but he couldn’t stop himself. “Don’t make me go!”

“What did that prat say to you?” Ron demanded, but Sirius shook his head ‘no’. He didn’t want to talk about it. He refused to talk about it. If he didn’t think about it, it didn’t happen.

“Sirius...” Harry said softly.

“It’s ok Sirius.” Hermione tried as she rubbed his back as he prattled on about being a good squib and not wanting to go.

“Sirius?” Remus asked coming up with Severus. “He’s spiraling. He hasn’t done that in months. What happened?”

“Malfoy said something to him and it freaked him out.” Harry said. “But he won’t tell us what.”

Severus sighed turning in a flurry of black robes. “I’ll handle him.”

“It’s ok Sirius.” Remus said removing him from Hermione, Sirius buried his face in Remus’s chest, forcing Remus to awkwardly half carry him out of the great hall. “It’s alright. It’s alright I’m here.”

**********

Remus glanced at Sirius as he sat with Severus discussing battle potions. Severus was explaining that most wizards don’t use them because they could cast spells but Sirius was very interested anyway. He worried about him, Regulus had gotten into Gryffindor itself and had attacked Ron trying to get Harry. It was troubling, what was worse was he feared what would happen if Regulus ever realized they had Sirius. He shuddered at the thought.

He watched Sirius quietly, he was eleven now. Naturally he was growing very fast do to un-stunting him but still. Even Severus was surprised at the attitude changes he was going through. Yes he one hundred percent still had break downs and Remus, really, really wished he would stay in his own bed all night. However the boy was changing, he was very active, Remus had seen him scale trees in seconds, walk on his hands and he was a very fast runner.

He looked up when the clock chimed, time for yet another patronus lesson with Harry he stood up and waited but Sirius didn’t move. Remus cleared his throat, “Sirius, I’m going to do Harry’s lesson. Aren’t you coming?”

“I’d like to stay with Severus please.” Sirius said waving over his shoulder as Severus continued talking.

Remus was a little put out, Sirius usually preferred going to patronus lessons. He sighed and walked away feeling a little dejected. He made it to his office and waited for Harry. When he showed up he looked around the room expectantly.

“He’s not here.” Remus said, as Harry gave him a perplexed look. “Talking potions with Severus, I’m afraid.”

“Oh,” Harry said, “Guess I got used to him being around.”

Remus chuckled, “He has certainly taken a shine to you.”

Harry smiled at this. They got to work slowly, Remus once again explaining how the charm works and he needs a happy memory. Happier than his first broom ride, happier then coming to Hogwarts. Harry just kept getting knocked down again and again.

“Let’s take a break.” Remus decided, handing him some chocolate. Harry ate in silence soon Remus felt his eyes boring into him. “Something on your mind?”

“Nothing sir. It’s just- Sirius.” He said making Remus look up. “Are you going to age him all the way up to your age or…”

“No, we think that would be too much for him.” Remus said sighing. “We hope to get him to your age then switching him to a dose only on his birthday. Making him grow up as normally as possible. We thought you two might become friends.”

“He is my friend.” Harry said nodding, before looking at him seriously. “He knew my father didn’t he?”

“Yes, he did.” Remus said softly, “We all did. It was horrible.”

“Regulus Black was my dad’s friend and he betrayed him.” Harry said glaring at the floor. “What will they do to him, when they catch him?”

“He will get a worst fate then death. The dementors kiss.” Remus said, he sighed wondering how his dear old friend could have fallen so far for it to come to this.

“What’s that sir?”

“They suck out your soul. You can exist without your soul, you know, as long as your brain and heart are still working. But you’ll have no sense of self anymore, no memory, no… anything. There’s no chance of recovery. You’ll just- exist. As an empty shell. And your soul is gone forever… lost.” Remus said bowing his head at the idea, it just seemed cruel. He looked up at Harry, with Lily’s eyes James face and sighed. No it’s what he deserved.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok lets face it we all knew Regulus was coming back. Well... He's back! Kinda... He's doing the stalking the rat from the shadows thing...  
> I had to make Regulus's boggart an Inferi and we all know why... :'(  
> Sirius is acting older but when he gets scared then he wants to be cuddled and held. Though he is recognizing that he's older and doesn't want to feel that way but he can't help it.   
> Hope you like it. Update Wednesday


	14. Chapter 14

Sirius walked between Harry and Hermione, he was almost as tall as them. Twelve felt good, Remus and Severus were way more relaxed with him and didn’t refer to Hermione as his babysitter only as his friend. Ron would still give him a little side eye but he didn’t care what the red head thought of him. He sighed tonight was a full moon, he was desperately going to miss Severus and Remus but Harry had agreed to let him sleep over in the Gryffindor dorms. Which was amazing, no Minerva babysitting him tonight.

He flinched hearing laughter, Malfoy sneered looking at his friends. “Look at that fool blubber! And he’s supposed to be our teacher. Pathetic!”

Harry and Ron moved forward ready to fight but Hermione beat them too it slapping Draco across the face. “Don’t you dare call Hagrid pathetic you foul- evil- little cockroach!”

“You nasty little-” Draco stopped talking as a wand was shoved in his face.

“Hermione, leave him he’s not worth it.” Harry said as Sirius moved behind him nervous.

Hermione backed away, as Malfoy started mocking them again. “Yeah listen to your loser friends. Besides you’re scaring your pet squib.”

She turned and hit him hard, Sirius was sure he heard a pop as blood bubbled down Draco’s face. Draco screamed running, with Crabbe and Goyle quickly behind, Sirius gave a tiny smirk. Ron swallowed hard, as Hermione looked at them. “That felt good.”

“It looked good.” Ron said.

“Sorry you had to see that Sirius.” She said, reaching for his hand pulling him along. “I can’t stand Malfoy and the way he talks about people.”

“It’s fine.” He said nodding, “You’re right he’s a prat.”

“Poor Hagrid,” Harry said as the hut came into view.

“Poor Buckbeak,” Hermione added.

They chatted for a bit with Hagrid as the half giant cried and moaned about losing his friend. Sirius felt bad for him, he really did but he didn’t know what to say so he stood back, glancing out the window. At some point Hagrid announced that he had found Ron’s rat Scabbers, he looked over seeing only a tail sticking out of Ron’s hands. He jumped as the pot next to him shattered, they turned looking at him.

“I- I didn’t do it!” He stammered eyes wide hands fidgeting ready to block.

“Don’t worry about it. Nothing a little glue can’t fix.” Hagrid said as Harry gasped in pain holding the back of his head a small rock hitting the table.

“Oh no- They’re coming.” Harry said looking behind him.

“Hagrid we’ll stay with you.” Hermione offered but Hagrid waved them away. Stating they were too young to see such things. Hermione took Sirius’s hand more for her comfort then his as she led him out the back with the other boys following. They ducked behind giant pumpkins before making their way up the hill. Hermione paused watching from the hill top as the executioner raised his axe, when it came down she pulled Sirius in burying her face in his hair sobbing.

“Come on Hermione.” Harry said, “Let’s go in.”

“Oww! Scabbers stop!” Ron yelled from behind them as the rat jumped from his hands running. “Help me catch him!”

They jogged down the hill and towards the whomping willow before Ron jumped landing on his rat. He sat up cheerfully holding him close to his stomach, when Sirius’s heart stopped. He would recognize that dog anywhere. Regulus glared down at them before barking charging at them, Harry and Hermione freaked out. His brother grabbed Ron dragging him backwards under the whomping willow as he screamed the whole way.

“Ron!” Harry yelled. Sirius bolted from them, running and sliding under the tree’s attack in one move. “Sirius! Come back!”

He ignored Harry dropping down into the tunnel. He had to do this, this was his brother. He had to know why he betrayed them. He wandered down the dark tunnel until he got to the shrieking shack, he climbed the stairs seeing Ron huddled in the corner looking at him surprised. His brother’s dog form moved across the room growling. He opened the door, as Regulus’s gaze snapped to him snarling.

“Reggie?” He said inching into the room, he stopped growling head cocking. “It’s me, Sirius. Severus is fixing me.”

The dog looked at him running full speed, he covered his face out of habit when arms wrapped around him squeezing him tightly. He heard Ron gasp, he was pulled back staring into very shaky eyes as Regulus took him in. He looked at his brother as well, he was a mess, his hair matted, teeth yellowed, skin waxy and stretched.

“You’re here! You’re alive!” Regulus yelled, picking him up by Sirius’s upper body to spin him. “I told them! I told them I didn’t kill you! But they didn’t believe me!”

“Let him go!” Harry yelled running into the room with Hermione. “It’s me you want, let my friends go.”

“Harry, it’s been a long time.” Regulus said putting Sirius down.

“I’m going to kill you!” Harry yelled drawing his wand blasting Regulus to the floor.

“Reggie!” Sirius yelled as Regulus landed with a thump.

“Expelliamis!” Remus yelled disarming Harry as he rushed into the room followed by Severus, both men pointed their wands at Regulus.

“You look like shit.” Severus said holding out his hand, making Regulus laugh as he grabbed it.

He pulled him up into a hug as Regulus ranted, “I found him! I found him! I told you! Now let’s kill him!”

“Wait,” Remus said holding up a hand as he pulled Sirius towards him.

“I did my waiting!” Regulus bellowed, “Twelve years of it! In Azkaban!”

“But Harry deserves to know why.” Severus said whirling on the group.

“I know why. He betrayed my parents and now he’s here to finish the job.” Harry yelled.

“That’s what we thought- until the map.” Remus said. “Peter Pettigrew’s name you pointed it out.”

“The map was wrong.” Harry argued.

“The map’s never wrong!” Severus snapped.

“Enough talk let’s kill him!” Regulus yelled moving his arms around frantic.

“No! I trusted you, you are our teachers! You’re helping him.” Hermione said, “You’re all friends!”

“You were my friend.” Harry growled looking at Sirius.

“Harry relax.” Remus said.

“No! Don’t trust him Harry he’s a werewolf.” Hermione said.

“Clever girl. How did you figure it out?” Remus asked.

“You only had me watch Sirius on full moons. It was easy.” Hermione said.

“Let me kill him!” Regulus yelled unable to stand it any longer.

Sirius watched as Remus, Severus and Regulus explained more about Peter, finally grabbing the rat and forcing him to become a man. Sirius’s eyes widened, as Peter ran around the room fleeing the three men. Finally he ran up grabbing Sirius pushing him between them like a shield.

“Don’t touch my brother!” Regulus bellowed furious, slamming his hands on the table starting to climb over it. “When I get my hands on you I’ll strangle the life right out of you myself!”

Terrified Peter ran to Harry begging to be saved. The three adults circled him, vengeance on their minds when Harry held up his hands. “Stop, you aren’t going to kill him. My dad wouldn’t want his friends to become killers. We’re going to bring him to the castle, he’ll be tried and the dementors can have him.”

With that settled Severus escorted Peter out while Hermione and Remus helped Ron. Sirius walked face pushed into Regulus with Harry walking on Regulus’s other side. Regulus smiled down at him, “I can’t believe you’re so big. I always knew Severus was good with potions but this it’s insane.”

“I missed you so much.” Sirius said looking up at him, “I’m so glad you didn’t do it Reggie.”

“I would never. I would have died for my friends.” Regulus said looking at Harry. “Your dad was my best friend, he- he helped me rescue my brother Sirius from my family. I was the best man at his wedding and I’m actually your godfather.”

They climbed out of the tunnel moving to sit away from the group. He brought Sirius with them, Sirius was afraid to let him go anyways. “Harry, I know you live with your aunt and uncle but when this is over. When I’m free, you could come live with me and Sirius. Only if you’d like.”

“Yes!” Harry said quickly. “Yes, I’d love too.”

“Harry!” Hermione yelled making the trio turn as Remus writhed about.

“Remus!” Regulus yelled running up holding him. Severus kept Pettigrew at wand point while trying to round the children up behind him. Regulus held tight. “Did you remember your medicine? Fight it friend!”

Sirius’s breath quickened as he watched Remus twitch about. Moony threw him back finishing his transformation, he growled looking at them furious as Pettigrew started to morph back into a rat. Severus shot hexs at the retreating rat but didn’t dare leave the kids unattended with a werewolf.

“He’s getting away!” Harry yelled, moving. Moony took this as a threat lunging at them when Regulus’s animagi form launched at him fighting him.

“Reggie!” Sirius yelled.

“Go back to the castle all of you.” Severus demanded, “We’ll handle this.”

“Regulus!” Harry yelled as Moony tossed him away charging after him, Sirius and Harry ducked around Severus running after Regulus. Moony had him pinned, Harry shot a spell making him glare at them, he got up lumbering towards them. Harry grabbed his hand, “Sirius get behind me.”

A small yipping noise had Moony distracted, he looked over as a black fox darted in front of them. He quickly became very interested in the fox, as it jumped around before taking off into the woods Moony hot on his heels. Sirius looked at Harry, “Severus is an animagi too.”

“Brilliant. Now come on!” Harry said taking his hand running them down to the water where Regulus had collapsed.

“Reggie! Reggie!” He called shaking his brother, Regulus startled before screaming pointing at the air. Sirius looked at Harry alarmed as the lake next to them started freezing over. Harry was waving his wand in the air casting small beams of light. Regulus’s body jerked as he gasped, slowly Sirius felt himself sinking into his brothers body as hopelessness over took him. “Harry… Somethings wrong…”

“It’s ok, I’m here! Regulus, Sirius stay with me!” Harry yelled, as his eyes watched the sky.

Sirius laid his head down on Regulus feeling the sway and jerk of his body. It was over, it was hopeless. He blinked slowly feeling utterly defeated as Harry began to collapse next to him. Sirius reached out rubbing his brother’s body, this was worse than a boggart he thought. He glanced at the lake as a silvery stag ran towards them, he blinked slowly closing his eyes. “James…”

**********

When Sirius woke up he was in the hospital wing. He looked around seeing Ron laying in a bed with a broken leg while Harry and Hermione argued with Dumbledore. Dumbledore sighed deeply, as Harry spoke. “Sir please Regulus is innocent. It was Peter Pettigrew. Please.”

“I believe you my boy, but we have no proof. The word of four children will not sway the ministry.” Dumbledore said.

Sirius jumped out of the bed running over, “You can’t let them kill my brother. I just got him back! Remus and Severus saw. They know!”

“Professor Lupin and Professor Snape are indisposed at the time.” Dumbledore said sadly, “I’m sorry, there is nothing more I can do. If only we had enough time. Ms. Granger three turns ought to do it and when in doubt I find retracing my steps helps, perhaps two lives can be spared.”

With that Dumbledore closed the doors to the hospital wing. Sirius’s eyes watered hands going to his hair. “They’re going to kill Reggie!”

“No they’re not.” Hermione said removing a hidden time turner. “Harry come here. Ron sorry but you can’t walk.” Sirius ran up but Hermione held her hand out stopping him as she wrapped the metal chain around her and Harry. “Sorry Sirius, you better sit this one out.”

“But-” Sirius was cut off as she spun the dial disappearing.

“Where did they go?” Ron asked. Sirius ignored him nibbling his nails as the hospital doors burst open as Hermione and Harry ran in dirty and panting. “What just happened?”

“Did you do it?” Sirius asked running in front of them wide eyed and pleading.

“Yes, Sirius.” Harry said, rubbing sweat from his brow. “You’re brother, he escaped on Buckbeak.”

“Two lives were spared.” Hermione said.

Sirius couldn’t help it he smiled sadly hiccupping over joyed. “Did- did James come?”

“It wasn’t my dad Siri,” Harry said pulling the shorter boy into a hug, “It was me. That was my patronus we saw.”

**********

Remus was happy to have Regulus back really he was, he had missed his friend and pack mate terribly. He was also incredibly relieved that he was not a psychotic murderer and traitor. However Remus was also terrified, he knew logically once Regulus could clear his name he would take Sirius back. Which as Severus pointed out he had every right to but Remus loved Sirius like he was his own his heart clenched at the thought of him leaving.

They had some kind of silent agreement as of now about not talking about it in front of Sirius. He was the only one that seemed happy and blissfully unaware at the tight smiles and worried looks the adults shared. Regulus had basically moved in with them to be with Sirius though he had to keep the ministry on their toes so he would leave for a few days to throw off the aurors. It was on one such times as this that Regulus came back looking extra haggard. Sirius had thrown himself on him, thirteen was definitely big enough to knock the air out of Regulus.

Regaining himself Regulus cupped Sirius’s face, “You shouldn’t hug me I’m dreadfully dirty. Go take a shower.”

Sirius pursed his lips but disappeared all the same. Regulus flopped in a chair sighing heavily, he almost seemed to deflate. He closed his eyes becoming very still, Remus was sure he fell asleep till he felt him boring holes into him a few minutes later. He and Severus looked up from their game of wizard’s chest.

“Something on your mind Regulus?” Severus asked.

“A lot actually.” Regulus said, “Where’s your liquor?”

“Kitchen above the fridge.” Remus answered.

“Hope you don’t mind if I get into it.” He said as Sirius appeared ready for bed.

“I’m going to bed.” He announced Remus opened his arms as Sirius hugged him and then Severus goodnight. He looked at Regulus expectantly.

“I’ll walk you up but I’m taking a shower. Just go to bed I need to talk to the guys.” Regulus said following him up.

Remus shared a look with Severus. Something was going on with Regulus he wasn’t showering Sirius with his normal over affectionate nature. Plus he wanted to talk, and he’d asked about their liquor. Remus blanched, he wouldn’t ask for Sirius before his name was cleared. Would he? He looked at Severus but his husband was fighting to keep his face expressionless as he pointedly ignored him.

When Regulus was done his shower he stared at them from the bottom of the stairs a long time before going to the kitchen. Remus heard him getting a wine bottle and glasses. He couldn’t take it anymore he looked at his husband. “Severus what do we do? He probably wants to take Sirius early. I know it’s selfish but I’m not ready.”

Severus looked at him sadly taking his hand as Regulus walked in levitating them all full glasses. They sat there staring at each other, finally Regulus spoke. “So about Sirius… What happened after I was- arrested?”

“We don’t know.” Remus said softly. “From what we’ve gathered he went back to your parents. They only died maybe five-six years ago. And we know he lived with the Malfoy’s. But not much else.”

“Was he around a Barrick? A John Barrick.” Regulus asked glaring at his glass. “He owns a potions shop.”

Remus wasn’t sure but Severus held his breathe, “Yes. I remember him from the Malfoy’s party the night Remus found Sirius.” He gasped continuing, “He’s the one that Sirius was afraid of when I entered his mind.”

“Sick bastard.” Regulus growled, “He use to experiment on my brother. He’d take his blood and skin. I found out when James and I rescued him that Barrick would test potions on him.”

Remus covered his mouth horrified as Severus nodded understanding. “We need to talk to him. Maybe with you here he’ll actually tell us what happened. Then we could press charges.”

Regulus shook his head lip trembling, “Squibs don’t have the same rights as us. You rescued him three years ago, statue of limitations on squib abuse cases is only a year.”

“That’s horrible!” Remus snapped.

“I know.” Regulus swallowed his pain in his drink before continuing. “So about us and Sirius and guardianship.” Remus swallowed bitterly. Here it comes he thought. “You guys should keep him.”

“What?” Remus said noticing the surprise on Severus and the sadness on Regulus as he tried not to cry.

“I love Sirius. I do. I would die for him. But I can’t give him this.” He gestured around the room at the house. “I was almost caught tonight. I can’t have a repeat of what happened. I could never forgive myself.”

He broke crying bitterly body shaking. Remus felt horrible he moved quickly wrapping his arms around his dear friend. “Regulus that will never happen again. We will be here for you. Both of you. We are so sorry. I- I’m going to step down as the defense teacher. I’ll have more time to help you clear your name. Then you can be there completely for Sirius.”

“No. You don’t have to do that.” Regulus said bitterly.

“I want to.” Remus said squeezing him.

“Regulus,” Severus said using the voice he reserved for a Sirius’s panic attack. “Just because we stay guardians doesn’t mean you can’t be there for him. We can raise him together. All three of us.”

“Really?” Regulus said looking up hopeful.

“Of course.” Remus said. “You need to be in Sirius’s life just as much as he needs to be in yours. We wouldn’t dream of doing this without you.”

“Thank you.” Regulus cried. They stayed sitting in silence for a long time before Regulus collected himself.

Together they stood, Remus smiled at him. “Come on Sirius is probably waiting for you. Ready for bed Snuffles?”

Regulus actually laughed almost tearing up again in bitter sadness. “For once I’m real happy to hear you call me that. …But maybe not make it a habit.”

**********

This summer had been good to Sirius, he had his brother back and he was staying with them between hiding of course. With Regulus home, Severus could go with Remus during the full moons. However there was one particularly bad moon this summer, Remus had been losing his mind for days before. So he was promptly brought to Hermione’s for the night so both men could help Remus. Her parents were skeptical of having a boy sleep over but upon realizing he had been a physical child last they saw him they caved. He had discovered muggle rock music that night, which upon showing Regulus, he adored too.

Sirius had taken to wearing muggle clothes like Regulus, which did make him stand out but Regulus had a huge point muggle t-shirts and jeans were very comfy. He walked next to Harry through Diagon Alley with Ron, Ginny and Hermione. He felt grown up being out with them. Fourteen, all caught up with the un-stunting, now it was only doses on his birthday. Harry bumped him giving him a smile, “So how’s life been with your brother back?”

“My brother great. But after that- Umm… Abysmal.” Sirius said laughing, “Like it was fun at first and still is but now I have three people bossing me around. And sometimes they get into arguments on ‘raising’ me. Like for example Reggie was willing to let me go with you guys alone today, but Remus wanted to supervise it. He got really scared after the Death Eaters attacked the quidditch world cup and has been over protective. Severus I honestly only think he came for the coffee and to mediate them.”

He and Harry glanced back seeing the two men and the large dog not that far behind them with Mr. and Mrs. Weasley. Harry laughed while Sirius cringed. Harry smiled looking at him gently, “I can’t blame Remus, it got nasty at the world cup. It must be kind of nice though. Having basically three parents watching out for you.”

“He’s actually my younger brother, and they’re my- friends- guardians. It’s confusing.” Sirius said hiding his face. “Honestly Severus is the only one that doesn’t seem to be making it his life goal to embarrass me. Remus tried to cut my food again and Reggie tried giving me a bath. I’m going to be fifteen!”

“I think it’s nice. I wish I had people trying to take care of me like that.” Harry said glancing at him.

“Harry, James was crazy about you.” Sirius said smiling, “He got you a ‘my first broom’ kit and used a padding charm on the whole house just to fly you in circles in the living room. I was very jealous.”

“He did that?” Harry smirked before looking at him curious, “Why were you jealous?”

Sirius’s face fell, “Squibs can’t fly.”

“Oh, right.” Harry said, “Hey when we get to Hogwarts I’ll take you on a broom ride!”

“That would be nice.” Sirius said softly. He was worried that someday Harry would get bored of him not being able to do the stuff he could. He sighed sadly as Ron and Harry started talking quidditch this and that, he ignored them. They stopped at the books store, he took his brother’s leash as Snuffles wagged his tail happily at him. His friends went in the book store while the adults went into the coffee shop leaving him alone with his brother.

He pulled him over sitting on one of the small tables away from the crowd as Snuffles collapsed at his feet panting in the sun. Sirius crossed his arms leaning on the table heavily leash wrapped tight in his hand. “I’ve been thinking, maybe I should leave the magical world. I could live in the muggle world in peace.”

“But then I might never see you again little one.” Sirius froze as hands brushed his long hair back tracing his neck. He didn’t need to turn around to know it was Barrick, his face crumpled brow knitting in fear. He heard a deep growl by his feet, as he started shaking. Barrick sighed, “I liked you better when you were smaller. I can’t believe they undid all my nice work.”

“Please go away...” Sirius whispered, hunching in on himself. He felt his brother shift to standing growling menacingly.

“Oh little one remember squibs can’t say no. Besides we had so much fun the last time we were together.” Barrick said still playing with his hair. “You’re bigger now but don’t worry. I still won’t mind _using_ _you_.”

Sirius sobbed ducking his head away from his touch, he didn’t want to think about it. If he didn’t think about it, it didn’t happen. From the corner of his eye he saw Barrick reaching for him again, he closed his eyes. His body jerked around pulled by the leash as his brother lunged barking, followed by a scream. Snuffles had grazed Barrick’s forearm with his canines drawing blood. Sirius was sure if he hadn’t been holding the leash so tight Snuffles would have had Barrick’s arm in his jaw.

“Filthy squib.” Barrick hissed threw gritted teeth holding his arm tight. That only egged his brother on who tried a second lunge yanking Sirius almost out of his seat. Snuffles was standing at the edge of his leash desperate to get him barking and growling. Barrick backed away disappearing into the crowd. Only once he was sure he was gone did Snuffles calm down returning to Sirius rubbing against him.

“You have blood on your face.” Sirius said in minor shock of what just happened. Snuffles wagged his tail happily. Sirius sunk to the ground holding him, he pushed his face into his fur. “Thanks Reggie.”

**********

“I don’t want to leave you Reggie!” Sirius cried, holding his brother around the neck as Regulus patted his back. He couldn’t stop thinking of all the times in his life Regulus would leave and things would become horrible for him. So here he was crying in the living room holding his brother in place.

“Sirius, it’s not forever.” Regulus said softly. “I can’t go to school with you. I need to track down that rat Peter to clear my name. Besides you’ll have your friends and Severus and Remus.”

“That’s right.” Remus said, from his spot by the floo. “Regulus will be here when we come back and you can write each other and maybe Snuffles can visit the castle from time to time.”

“Do you promise?” Sirius said pulling back.

Regulus rubbed his hands down Sirius’s scarred arms, he rubbed down to his hands giving them a tight squeeze brushing his thumb over a burn scar. “Of course, I promise big brother. I love you”

Sirius’s eyes widened, he hadn’t been referred to as a big brother in years. He smiled at him, feeling really light and happy. “I love you too Reggie!”

Remus came over offering his hand to get him through the floo. “Don’t worry Sirius, I stepped down from my teaching roll. We’ll spend more time together and I’m going to help Regulus clear his name. Come on, Severus is probably waiting for us.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to refer to Regulus in his animagi form as Snuffles because saying "Regulus was standing at the edge of his leash desperate to get him barking and growling." paints a weird picture in my head.  
> I wrote a time travel chapter for my other fic and honestly it was a pain. Never again...  
> The rat escaped but we bit Barrick. Haha
> 
> Please let me know what you think! :)


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reminder to read the tags.   
> And before you comment please read my notes at the bottom.

Sirius laid back exhausted, he had been helping Remus and Hagrid tend the grounds, he really enjoyed it. It gave him something to do when he wasn’t reading or occasionally drawing and he felt like he was getting pretty strong from all the work. However he held up his hand looking at his arm, he felt like his scars looked worse since he started to tan from being in the sun. They were ugly, covering his skin in cuts, burns and discoloration he frowned at them.

“Sirius, thank you so much for helping me lately.” Remus said looking down at him he smiled brightly. Sirius looked at him, his scars where more prominent too. Sirius reached up touching his own face running fingers over a scar on his jaw. Remus cocked his head, “Something on your mind?”

“Do you think my scars are ugly?” Sirius asked, making Remus’s brows raise.

“Of course not.” Remus said sitting with him. “Severus and I both have scars and I don’t think they’re ugly, it shows we lived through something and survived. Just like Harry, just like you.”

“But I’m covered in them.” Sirius said sitting up looking at his arms. “All terrible memories.”

“Yes. Scars tend to remind us of things.” Remus said softly, “However scars are not an injury, they are a result of the injury healing. I look at you and I see someone strong who is trying to cope with something horrible that he never should have had to live through. Sirius our scars show pain and suffering, but they also show our will to survive. Lily once told Severus that ‘Scars are beautiful when we see them as a reminder that we courageously survived.’”

“Thanks.” Sirius said smiling at him.

“Any time, love.” Remus said softly.

“I should go, Harry promised to take me for a broom ride after dinner.” He stood dusting his jeans.

“You and Harry are getting very close.” Remus said smiling. “If you ever need to talk-”

“It’s not like that Remus.” Sirius said embarrassed as Remus waved him off chuckling.

He hustled into the great hall pretending not to notice the stares of the students as he went to the Gryffindor table. He was thrilled when Regulus had helped him convince Remus to let him sit with the students, Severus luckily didn’t care so long as he was happy. He saw Malfoy and pointedly avoided his gaze as the blond sat on the table reading an article out loud about Arthur Weasley helping Moody out of a tangle with muggle police while mocking them both.

“Damn that Malfoy is a prat.” Ron growled as Sirius slid in next to Hermione. He glanced at the small black haired teen and gave a snort. “Are you wearing muggle clothes? You should be in uniform.”

“I’m not a student.” Sirius said dryly as Harry laughed.

“Hey Weasley,” Malfoy snapped making them look up. “How’s it feel to know the only thing you’re father’s good for is cleaning up messes? Why he’s no better than a house elf!”

Ron grit his teeth, as Harry put a hand on his shoulder. “Ignore him.”

“Well at least a house elf has magic. So he’s at least better than a squib, right Black?” Malfoy sneered.

Sirius glared angrily at his food, as Harry stood up. “Come on, I’m sick of listening to him. We’ll eat by the lake.”

They stood as a group walking away, Hermione dragging Ron who looked ready to hurl a hex. Sirius stood close to Harry, as the other teen told him about his classes pointedly ignoring Malfoy. “You’re classes sound so fun and interesting. I wish I could go.”

“Why don’t you? I don’t use magic in all of them.” Harry said bumping into him smiling, Sirius made a humming noise, he’d never thought about that before. “I mean do we even need magic to do potions? It’s just mixing ingredients.”

“Don’t you walk away from me Potter!” Malfoy spat.

“Oh no you don’t!”

The four of them whirled around seeing Moody pointing his wand where Malfoy once stood a snow white ferret in his place. He waved his wand bouncing the ferret around making the students laugh. The students laughed but Sirius was still thinking about what Harry said, maybe he could join their classes.

**********

“Can I come to your class?” Sirius asked Hagrid as the half giant started crossing the field. He paused looking at him curiously.

“Come to class? Blimmy Sirius you’re not a student why would you want to do that?” Hagrid asked as Sirius held his hands behind his back.

“Well- I don’t need magic to do your class and because it looks fun.” Sirius said head tilting to smile at him. “I’ll stay in the back out of the way. Please?”

“You think my class looks fun?” Hagrid asked happily. “Come on then you can start Monday! You can sit in on Harry’s class with the other forth years.”

Sirius smirked pleased with himself, Hagrid was easy to convince. Professor Binns already taught him history so getting him to agree to let him go to class with the other fourth years was a no brainer. Professor Sprout on the other hand was a different story.

“Please can I join your class?” He asked as he leaned on her desk giving her his sweetest smile, the one that got his guardians and brother to cave to his wishes. She looked at him her brow raised as she chuckled.

“Why would you want to do that dear?” She said lacing her fingers together.

“I don’t need magic to study and care for plants.” He said, “Please I’ll be really quiet and stay in the back.”

“Hmm… I don’t know. No offense Sirius sweetie but you could get hurt. You can’t defend yourself against a venomous tentacula or a creeping willow rod.” She said cocking her head.

Sirius sighed he didn’t want to have to do this, he looked up sadly. “It’s alright I understand I don’t want to bother you.”

“Oh pumpkin you wouldn’t be a bother.”

“Oh it’s alright Professor Sprout. I just wanted to feel like I belong here.” He said trying to guilt her into agreeing, he saw her having an internal debate before she looked at him.

“Fine Mr. Black you can join my class starting next week.”

“Thank you! You won’t even notice me. I’ll sit in the back and-”

“No!” She cried startling him backwards. “No, not the back. I want you where I can see you. These plants can move quickly, I don’t need Remus and Severus breathing down my neck if you got hurt. You can come but you are just to watch.”

“Oh… Alright thanks.” Sirius said at least it was a start.

He steeled himself by Severus’s door watching the gaggle of first years leave before slipping inside the classroom. Severus didn’t look pleased walking around muttering about his annoyance with silly wand waving. He looked up seeing Sirius nervously fidgeting in front of him.

“Sirius, I thought you were helping Remus.” He said cracking his neck.

“He only lets me help until lunch.” Sirius said, “Then I just do whatever. Umm- I wanted to talk to you though about potions.”

“Ugh, Sirius I’m sorry can it wait? I have a meeting with Dumbledore now. Can you come back in half an hour?” He asked, Sirius nodded as Severus went to erase the board.

“I’ll do that! So you can go to your meeting faster. I’ll even pick up the room for you.” Sirius said.

Severus looked at him before nodding. “Thank you. I won’t be long. Then we can talk potions all you want.”

Sirius smirked watching him leave through the floo, once the flames went back to normal he whirled around reading the board, Headache reliever, looked easy enough. He nibbled his lip picking up the cauldron, he wasn’t sure if he should do this but he wanted to convince Severus to let him come to class. He dragged over the cauldron and set it up, he cursed he didn’t have a way to start a fire. He quickly went to the fireplace carefully collecting a small bit of flame to stick under the cauldron. Then came his next challenge getting water.

He paced around the room but had no luck, he grabbed the cauldron lugging the ten pound thing to the nearest bathroom filling it a quarter way. He wasn’t even sure if he could brew but he wanted to try. Besides like Harry even said he didn’t even know if making potions used magic. It didn’t involve wands or anything so maybe he could.

He put the cauldron onto the flame, checked the board and collected the ingredients. He chopped and diced and measured. He added them when he was supposed to, he stirred the correct way and the number of times. He peeked in the cauldron, seeing no blue coloring or creamy consistency it was just murky water filled with leaves, porcupine quills and ground grindylow eggs.

“Hmm… You did everything right. Pity. Unfortunately you need to be a wizard.” Severus said scaring Sirius half to death as he leaned over him. “Those where good ingredients.”

“I’m sorry.” Sirius stuttered out. “I wanted to try- to see if I could. It’s just mixing ingredients.”

“Sirius its fine.” He said banishing his mess. “Is this what you wanted to talk to me about? Learning potions?”

Sirius looked down embarrassed. “Yes. I wanted to see if you would let me sit in on your classes.”

“Sirius I know it just looks like I’m adding ingredients but it needs a magical presence to make them work.” He said leading Sirius out of the dungeons and along the halls. “You can’t sit in on my classes. If there were to be an explosion you could get really hurt.”

“Alright.” Sirius said sadly, “I just thought I could.”

“I’ll teach you potions if you want. Separately just the two of us but you can’t make them.”

“Really? That would be great.” He said glancing up as Severus drummed his fingers along a painting of a pear. “Where are we?”

“The kitchens.” Severus said as the portrait swung open revealing a bunch of house elves in a rather large and beautiful kitchen.

Dipsey popped in front of them eagerly. “Professor Sir. What can Dipsey do for you and Sirius Sir?”

“Squib Sirius.” Dobby yelled popping in next to Dipsey. “You are well! Dobby is so happy to see you again.”

“D-Dobby?” Sirius asked confused.

“Dobby is a free elf that works in Hogwarts now, Squib Sirius-”

“Just Sirius is good.” Sirius said quickly, Dobby nodded happily as Dipsey tried to shoo him off. Sirius looked at Severus, “Why am I here? Do you want me to work?” He asked genuinely curious, he’d helped house elves before so it wouldn’t surprise him.

“You’re not working your learning. You want to use my potions ingredients to make something. Well these types of ingredients will work much better for you.” Severus said leading them in, “Dipsey might we have a small work space?”

“Of course Professor Sir.” She said bouncing ahead showing them a nice space to work.

Sirius looked at Severus expectantly as Severus transfigured a quill, ink and parchment. He scribbled away before handing him a recipe. Sirius read it over as Severus sat down on a low table watching him. Sirius looked up, “Is this a recipe for chocolate cake?”

“Brownies actually.” Severus said summoning some essays to read over. He pointed his wand at him and with a flick of his wrist Sirius’s hair was in a bun out of his face. “Have fun. Dipsey and I are here if you need help.”

Sirius was nervous at first, but soon began to enjoy cooking. It reminded him of when he lived with James parents, Mia his mother had taught Sirius to make cookies. He really liked that, he had liked licking the spoon and getting to sit on the counter to help mix. He smiled to himself working away, he missed them. He wandered if Harry liked to cook, his grandmother had and Lily loved making sweets. She too would let Sirius help, though she didn’t do it from complete scratch like Mia.

“Sirius the ovens are instant cook.” Severus reminded him. Sirius nodded removing the brownies carefully, placing them on the counter. Severus did a cooling charm on them before serving them. “Now the best part. These are very good, well done.”

“Thanks.” Sirius said happily shoving the corner piece in his mouth. “Can I do this again?”

“Of course, I’m rather busy but I’m sure Remus would love teaching you.” Severus said. “Now we shouldn’t eat them all Remus will smell them on us and Merlin knows he’s a big a chocoholic as you are.”

**********

Sirius really loved watching the other two schools arrive, the ship was amazing coming out of the water, and the Pegasus where beautiful. He’d sent a letter to Regulus asking him how things were going and checking on him but he had yet to receive a reply.

He didn’t know what he did but a Drumstrang student had been smiling at him lately. He scrunched up his nose seeing him smile and give a little wave to him and Hermione as they sat watching people enter their names in the goblet. The Drumstrang student tossed his name in casting a smirk over his shoulder sauntering off with Viktor Krum.

Things got bad when Harry’s name came out of the Goblet, Dumbledore had asked him if he put Harry’s name in. He had shaken his head a violent no. The whole idea of the Goblet of Fire was horrifying to him, he’d never purposely do that to someone. He wanted to check on Harry, but when he got to the Gryffindor dorms Harry and Ron where having a fight over it. It got so bad Ron accused Harry of wanting the glory and not inviting him. Sirius had scoffed at this making Ron whirl on him.

“He’s how you did it huh?” Ron snapped pointing at Sirius.

“Leave him out of this.” Harry replied protectively. “I didn’t do it Ron.”

“You just want all the glory.” Ron grumbled, “You could have brought me in on it, your best friend.”

“Ron calm down, Harry said he didn’t do it.” Sirius said coming to Harry’s aid.

“Yeah right. I’m just Ron Weasley Harry Potter’s stupid side kick. Well now he can be your sidekick.” Ron grumbled, glaring at him and Sirius. He climbed into his bed, Harry tried to approach him but Ron rolled over. “Piss off.”

Harry sighed deeply, he looked at Sirius. “Come on Sirius, let’s give him space.”

**********

“The first task is dragons.” Sirius said walking backwards in front of Harry, making the other teen stumble out a what. Sirius nodded, “When I was taking my un-stunting potion I heard Remus mention it to Severus. It’s dragons.”

“Merlin…” Harry groaned he glanced at Sirius, “Hold on your fifteen now.”

“Why thank you for noticing.” Sirius said spinning on his heel. “I’m officially physically caught you with your grade. Although I’m still physically younger then Hermione but older then you and Ron.”

“Sirius you should have told me it was your birthday. Hermione and I we would have done something.” Harry stumbled, “Happy Birthday.”

“Thanks but it was a few days ago. I don’t celebrate it. Though I did bake myself some sweets, I meant to bring you some.” Sirius said catching the eye of that same Drumstrang student he smirked at Sirius giving him a wave. He cocked his head at him giving a confused smile before looking back at his friend. “Please be careful Harry.”

“I will.” Harry said softly.

Watching dragons was really cool, Sirius really liked it when they crawled around. What he didn’t like was watching Harry fight them, he was terrified the whole time that he would get hurt. He sighed happily watching Harry zip around on his broom fighting the dragon, he was so brave. He was glad to be sitting with Hermione even if she was grumbling about an annoying nosy reporter the whole time.

He was delighted when Harry actually tied for first. Hermione brought him back with her to Gryffindor as Harry celebrated raising the golden egg as people cheered for him to open it. Harry waved it above his head opening the egg, immediately everyone dropped covering their ears, except Sirius. Harry quickly closed the golden egg making everyone sigh in relief.

“What happened?” Sirius asked looking at Hermione as she held him standing up.

“You didn’t hear it?” She asked, he shook his head. “It was an awful screeching noise.”

“Oh…” He looked down. “I didn’t hear anything.”

“That’s lucky mate.” Fred said as George added. “I think I went partially deaf.”

“He’s right Sirius it was awful.” Ron said pushing past them. “Excuse me I need to talk to Harry.”

**********

“Are you going to ask someone to the Yule Ball?” Remus asked, Sirius nearly gagged. “Severus and I already ordered you new dress robes.”

“I can’t go to that.” Sirius hissed into his cereal.

“Why not?” Remus asked, leaning forwards. “It’s a wonderful time. I remember I was too afraid to ask Severus officially so we went as friends.”

“Remus.” Sirius said gesturing at himself. “Squib. I can’t go to a wizard’s ball.”

“Of course you can go.” Severus said sipping is coffee, “You’re a handsome young lad just ask someone you fancy.”

“Sirius do you like anyone?” Remus asked curiously.

Sirius looked away from them thinking of Harry. So brave, so handsome, Sirius smirked his face unknowingly blushing. “Yeah- I think… But I don’t think he likes me. How do I know if I like someone?”

“Does your heart flutter around him?” Remus asked smiling at him. “Does it make you happy to see him?”

“It does.” Sirius said growing red. “But it doesn’t matter. I’m going to go home. I want to see Reggie.”

Remus pursed his lips leaning over the table at him. “Well if that’s what you want.”

“That reminds me, here this came early this morning.” Severus said handing off a letter to Sirius.

“It’s from Reggie!” Sirius cheered sitting back to read. His face slowly fell before he dropped the letter on the table disappointed. “He can’t see me for Christmas. But he does want to meet the weekend before and a few days after.”

“I’m sorry Sirius.” Remus said straightening his shirt. “Just tell me when, I’d like to discuss things with him anyway.” 

**********

Sirius noticed that same Drumstrang student from a few days ago, smiling at him. He’d taken to doing that, the older boy would smile at him and sometimes wave. Sirius would normally just smile back confused. He was even doing it now, Hermione bumped him from his sketch. “Siri, wave back.”

“Umm…” He glanced over and gave the tiniest wave. The Drumstrang student smiled widely at him before continuing his walk around the lake. “Why am I waving?”

“He’s cute.” Hermione said leaning forwards tapping his legs with her book. “Maybe he’ll ask you to the Yule Ball.”

He jolted a little, “How’d you know I like boys?”

She smiled bemused, “You’re my best friend and you told me when you were little. Don’t you remember?”

“No.” Sirius said groaning, “Do I dare ask what I said.”

She just started giggling. He cast her an unamused look, as Harry and Ron approached looking a little rough. Sirius raised his brows as they sunk down into the grass with them. Ron looked at them, “Girls… Girls are awful. I tried to ask her and just- just stared… I couldn’t think of anything to say.”

“I haven’t asked the person I fancy yet so I haven’t fared much better.” Harry said glancing at Sirius.

Ron looked up, “Hermione you’re a girl. If a bloke shows up alone it’s one thing but a girl- that’s just sad.”

“I’ve already been asked by someone!” She snapped slamming her book standing. “And I said yes!”

With that she stormed away, Sirius looked at Harry shyly as Harry cleared his throat, “Way to go Ron.”

“I didn’t mean it in a bad way.” Ron said, “I was going to ask her if no one else had.”

“Then you should have just asked her.” Sirius said like it was obvious rolling his eyes.

“Sirius have you asked anyone?” Harry asked looking at him curious.

“He’s a squib. No one’s going to want to go with a squib.” Ron said picking at the frozen grass annoyed.

Now it was Sirius’s turn to storm away, it may be true but it didn’t feel good. He didn’t need his face rubbed in it constantly. He hated Christmas and he hated that the Yule Ball was on Christmas just making the horrible holiday worse.

“Sirius! Sirius wait!” Harry yelled grabbing his shoulder, he spun him around as Sirius glared trying not to flinch holding his sketchbook tight to his chest. “I’m sorry about Ron, he’s just a bit angry right now. Do you want to ask anyone?”

Sirius shook his head no. “He’s right, no one would want to go with me.”

“I’d go with you.” Harry said stepping into him, Sirius stepped back.

“That’s not funny Harry.” He said eyes moving down.

“It’s not a joke I-”

“Please stop.” Sirius said spinning away, Harry started to say something but Sirius was walking away again. His chest hurt, he felt so bitter. Why would Harry say that? It wasn’t funny, he knew someone like him would never want to be with someone as pathetic as him. He brushed away tears walking quickly away.

It was three days before the Yule Ball when he was cornered by the Drumstrang student. The older teen smiled down at him, “Hello little rebel.”

“Little rebel?” Sirius asked backing away as the muscular teen leaned on the wall boxing him in. Drumstrang where known for not taking in muggleborn students he could only imagine how he would react if he knew he was a squib.

“It’s cute. The way you don’t wear a uniform. Makes you a little rebel.” He said his accent thick. “Listen little rebel. My name’s Markus, I see you smiling at me, you even finally waved, flirty boy. Will you go to the Yule Ball with me?”

Sirius stared at him, squibs can’t say no to wizards. He bit his lip, maybe if he told him he was a squib he would just leave him alone. “I don’t wear a uniform because I’m not a student. I’m a squib.”

“I know, I heard from grape vine.” He said tilting his head, “So little rebel say yes.” Sirius didn’t say anything. He didn’t know what to say, so he just stared at him. He didn’t really feel like he had a choice or option. Markus patted his shoulder, “I know the answer. You can’t say no. Be at great hall for dance on time.”

**********

Remus had been beside himself that Sirius was going to the Yule ball and had a date. Severus on the other hand had pulled him aside and told him very sternly that if anything started to happen between him and his date that if he didn’t like to remove himself immediately. He also had instructed him that a firm slap or punch would work if he needed it. However Sirius couldn’t hit someone better then him. He was just squib, his mum had taught him he needed to serve wizards and witches.

Sirius fiddled with his robes as he stood by Harry and Ron and their dates. The ball was ok and Markus was nice enough. Hermione and Viktor Krum liked him, soon Ron liked him too. Harry didn’t seem to care for him but Harry and Ron had looked miserable with their dates all night. Markus had dragged him to the dance floor despite his protests, once on the dance floor he would feel anxiety building from being around so many people all looking at him and whispering about a squib. It distressed him to no end, so when Markus pulled him close to dance he actually found it relieving to be held.”

Whenever he got away he would rush back to sit by Harry. Harry smiled at him, “Well Markus seems nice.”

Sirius looked at him owlishly, before squishing down in his seat in misery arms crossed. “He’s fine I guess.”

“Sirios. Come, lets go to the hallway. I need air.” Markus said approaching, Sirius looked down. Air did sound nice but he also wanted to stay and talk to Harry. “Come on. I know you won’t say no to me.”

He begrudgingly stood up only to be grabbed by Harry, “Hey, are you alright?”

“Sirios, is fine.” Markus said placing an arm around his shoulders, Sirius nodded agreement.

“I’m fine, Markus is right some air would be good.” Sirius said, “Come wi-”

Markus laughed cutting him off. “Come on Sirios, I’m roasting.”

He was led out into the hall and around a few corners so they were away from prying eyes. Markus pulled him right into an alcove and cast a notice me not charm. He grabbed Sirius’s upper arms pulling him flush against him kissing him, Sirius eyes widened surprised. He turned his head away, but Markus brought his hand up turning his face back.

“Please stop.” He said using his free hand to push him, this was bringing up bad memories things he rather forget. “I- I don’t want to do this.”

“What do you mean? You’ve been asking for it all night, dancing close you flirty boy.” Markus said leaning in again. Sirius leaned away, thinking of what Severus said, a slap or punch. He raised his hand fulling intending to hit him but he froze. He didn’t want to be a bad squib. Markus looked up at his hand grabbing it, he used it to turn him around making him face the wall.

“What you going to hit me? I could stupefy you. I could easily win.” Markus said his voice in his ear. “This is why squibs can’t say no. Why _you_ can’t say no. Why do you think I brought you to the dance? Now you owe me!”

“Please stop…” He whispered as his robe was pushed aside and pants where pulled down, a belt jangled behind him. Years of conditioning made it so he didn’t move he just stood there shaking, he couldn’t say no. He was pushed against the wall, he felt him jam his fingers in him, he hissed as the man started forcing him open. He closed his eyes, trying to hold back his tears. It was happening again. He was older, he was bigger but it was happening again.

“You’re so tight.” Markus whispered in his ear. He’d never really healed right before, Barrick had just kept giving him potions to retighten him, never fix him. His face rubbed against the stone trying to focus on it’s texture not the man behind him roughly forcing his member against him. He gasped, starting to silently cry, it hurt. He felt it splitting him open. Oh Merlin it hurt.

A hand found its way to his hair pulling while the other held his hips forcing him to meet his thrusts. He kept his eyes closed and pretended it wasn’t happening. Not again. He tried to focus on something else the way the wall felt under his nails, the way his hair stung or how his knees threatened to buckle. His breath hitched as the older man thrust up even deeper grunting while doing so. He sobbed, it hurt. He felt like he was tearing again.

Sirius tried to focus on the sound of skin on skin, on the sound of music far away. He just wanted him to finish so he could leave. Markus started to huff thrusting sporadically before picking back up the pace jack hammering, Barrick did the same thing when he was almost done. Finally he slowed down doing a slow few final thrusts panting behind him. Sirius whimpered feeling the new warmth fill him. He held him there breathing heavily his breath on his neck.

Finally he pulled out completely letting Sirius go, allowing him to crumple to the floor. Markus cleaned himself up with his wand before squatting down to Sirius, he gave a quick wave of the wand making Sirius’s pants snap back into place. Sirius covered his face, it didn’t happen, it didn’t happen. If he didn’t think about it, it didn’t happen. It wasn’t like he had a choice he couldn’t say no.

“That was fun. You were a good date.” Markus said pulling him to his feet. Sirius ignored the feeling of pain as fluids dripped free and into his boxers making them sticky. Markus smirked at him, holding his chin tightly giving him a kiss. “See you later flirty boy.”

His face scrunched up as he stumbled away, he just wanted to go to the dungeons and scrub himself. He couldn’t say no. He rubbed his arms trying to calm down, he slowly schooled his face. It didn’t happen, it wasn’t real. He ignored the pain as he walked, and the way his thighs stuck together from the shameful fluids. He had asked for it. He shook his head, just don’t think about it. He couldn’t say no. It didn’t happen. He had led him on. It didn’t happen.

He got all the way down to the dungeons, without being seen or stopped. He climbed right into the shower turning it to the hottest setting he let the water burn him as he scrubbed his skin raw trying to hold in his tears. He kept scrubbing and scrubbing until his skin was painful to the touch. Between his legs was the worst, sticky, raw and he had definitely ripped from the trauma. It had happened again, he cursed slouching down crying into his knees. If he didn’t think about it, it didn’t happen, he repeated in his head.

When he came out his skin was red and tender but at least he felt cleaner. He dressed quickly before grabbing his soiled clothes he didn’t want to look at them ever again. He balled them up throwing them into the sink he scrubbed the dirty fluids away. He carried them back to his room stiffly, shoving them under his bed to the deepest corner. He turned off the light and climbed into his bed hiccupping tears away. He couldn’t lay on his back it hurt too much, but laying on his stomach made him feel like Markus or Barrick could be behind him. He laid on his side, knees to his chest and willed himself to sleep.

He didn’t sleep well that night, but he couldn’t bring himself to move in the morning. When he finally got up, he dressed and tried not to flinch as he walked. He looked at Remus smiling at him so brightly so happily as he handed him food. He took the plate but looked at the wooden chairs, he steeled himself and sat, the pressure he felt was horrible he stood up immediately earning a curious look. He smiled innocently taking his food to the couch where Severus was sitting. Severus looked up from his papers at him, a gentle smile in place. Sirius averted his eyes, he couldn’t let him see in his mind. Then he’s know, he’d know that Sirius didn’t defend himself, that he let it happen. That he couldn’t say no. His face scrunched up, if he didn’t think about it, then it didn’t happen.

Remus sat across from them and started talking about the Yule Ball and asking him questions. Sirius answered as honestly as he could. When asked about Markus, he froze a little but covered it quickly stating he didn’t think they would see each other again. After a time the topic changed to talk of the tri wizard tournament. He was relieved, he shifted uncomfortably on the couch trying to ease the pressure on his backside. If he didn’t think about it, it didn’t happen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am not victim blaming Sirius.   
> When he's having those thoughts in his head at the end, he's trying to "self blame" what happened to him as a way to give himself back control and disassociate himself from it. I'm no expert I'm just trying to write an story.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was away so my update schedule will be different this week. So here's a nice long chapter to make up for it.

Remus was getting worried about Sirius he was acting peculiar, he slept in more and more. He noticed he was a tad jumpy, and he had switched his clothing to baggier pants and shirts. Just the other day Remus found Sirius just staring at the kitchen chair while holding his toast, he seemed to be gravitating towards the floor but upon seeing Remus had sat normally. When he brought this up to Severus, his husband nodded in agreement. He admitted to Remus that he’d caught Sirius mumbling incoherently about being a ‘bad squib’ while standing in his closet. Remus wrote to Regulus that night saying they needed to meet as soon as possible. Thank Merlin he did as the next morning Sirius was sleeping on the floor of their room, his night terrors had come back and he had wanted to be near them. So here they were, the three of them in the shrieking shack discussing their pup.

“I feel like somethings wrong but I don’t know what.” Remus said, pacing the room. “It’s like he’s slowly regressing. Severus love do you think you could take a peek in his head?”

“I promised him I wouldn’t do that.” Severus said crossing his arms, “He has very frail trust to begin with I don’t want to push him.”

“Maybe he’s depressed.” Regulus said staring at the ceiling from his spot on the floor. He bit his lip rolling to look at them, “Do you think it’s my fault? I couldn’t be with him over Christmas and I know he wanted to be with me. Maybe I let him down.”

“Don’t blame yourself Regulus. But it could be.” Remus agreed sadly. “I know he misses you terribly.”

“But he should understand that you are on the run from the ministry.” Severus said softly, “You can’t stay in one place too long and you are after Pettigrew.”

“Regulus I’m so sorry, I’ve made no progress clearing your name. Moody is also more distracted than ever with working at the school so he’s been less then helpful.” Remus said hands in his hair, Regulus sighed in understanding.

“Can you take me to the castle?” Regulus asked, “I can’t stay long but maybe a surprise visit would pull him out of his funk.”

“That sounds like a marvelous idea.” Remus said smiling as Severus transfigured a collar and leash.

Snuffles nearly yanked Remus’s arm out in his haste to sniff out Sirius. Luckily the trio found him right away sitting with Harry and his friends. Remus let the leash go not wanting to trip, as Snuffles bowled Sirius and Harry over.

“Reg- Snuffles!” Sirius cried as his face was licked.

“We thought you seemed down.” Remus said walking up, “So surprise.”

“Oh Snuffles.” Harry cheered, pushing his face into his fur with Sirius. “How long can you stay? Can we talk at all?”

Snuffles shook his head, but continued licking at his brother and Harry. Severus sighed, “Unfortunately he cannot talk. Too many reporters and Ministry officials for it to be safe. Come on Remus, let them have their time. Snuffles there’s a full moon tonight, if you care to join us.”

Snuffles gave a happy bark before going back to being smothered in pats by the students and Sirius. Remus walked after his husband casting back a glancing seeing Sirius smile for the first time in a while. He looked at Severus, reaching out he took his hand. He tried to pull away at first not being one for public displays of affection but Remus held him tight. Finally Severus gave up letting him, Remus smirked, softy.

**********

Knocking from their quarters doors startled Sirius from his daze, he looked up from his cupcake and stag sketch. Remus hustled pass him opening the door for Harry inviting him in. “Harry good to see you, Sirius you’re friend’s here.”

Sirius blushed at himself wrapped in a fuzzy blanket eating a cupcake, not really that attractive feeling. He detangled himself trying to stand as Harry walked in smiling at him and Remus, “Thank you sir. You looked comfy.”

“Stuff it.” Sirius muttered placing his book and pencils down blushing. “Do you- do you want a cupcake? I made them.”

“Sure.” Harry said as he led them to the table where Severus sat, Sirius alone went farther into the kitchen to get the cupcakes not listening. “Umm… Hello Professor.”

“Potter.” He said bluntly barely looking up from his grading. “Is there a reason you’re in my quarters? Or are you simply here to gawk at Sirius?”

Harry made a choking noise at this while Sirius returned handing him a cupcake. Remus walked over chuckling, “Severus be nice. Do you like the cupcakes? Sirius made them, dark chocolate with candied bacon.”

“Remus’s recipe. It helps with his fury little problem.” Sirius said pleased with the happy noise Harry made.

“Really good Siri.” Harry said taking another bite. “Umm I wanted to ask you to come to Hogsmeade with me. And Hermione and Ron!” He added quickly as Severus and Remus leveled him with a look.

“Hogsmeade?” Sirius asked.

“It’s the town by here.” Remus said, “You should go you’ll like it.”

“Alright, that sounds fun.” Sirius said as Remus summoned Regulus’s leather jacket for him. They started for the door when Severus cleared his throat.

“Not so fast.” He stood glaring over Harry making him fidget before turning to Sirius handing him some money. “Don’t spend it all in one place.”

“Thanks Severus.” Sirius said pleased, as Severus waved his hand over his boots upping the tracking charms. “I’m not a little kid.”

“You’ll never be too old for us not to worry.” Remus said reaching up to ruffle his hair. Sirius’s eyes widened stepping back slightly alarmed, he did not want his hair touched after how bad Markus had pulled it.

“Ok, well I’m going to go now. Bye.” Sirius said rushing from the room followed by Harry. “They can be so overbearing.”

Harry just laughed. They met up with Hermione and Ron by the path to Hogsmeade and walked as a group happily. They did a little shopping, and went to Honeydukes, Sirius did not want to go inside the sweets shop it was far too crowded for his taste. So he and Harry had gone ahead to the Three Broomsticks grabbing a table and butterbeers.

“Have you ever had a butterbeer?” Harry asked as Sirius eyed the foamy drink.

“I’ve had a rootbeer float. I didn’t like it and well- I spit it out on myself. James had to help clean me.” He said taking a careful sip, “Oh this is much better than that dreadful thing.”

“My dad liked rootbeer floats too?” Harry asked excited. “What else did he like?”

“Quidditch, pranks, making really bad jokes and I mean really bad.” Sirius said as Harry laughed, he smiled back at him his hand resting on the table. Harry reached out slowly taking it, he looked down at their joined hands as Harry rubbed a thumb over a burn scar before letting him go. Sirius wasn’t sure how he felt about that, he liked Harry but Harry wouldn’t want him. He couldn’t do magic and if he knew what Markus and Barrick had done to him he’d be disgusted. He pulled his hand back to his lap, Harry probably didn’t mean it the way he wanted it anyway he thought sadly.

“Here you go mate.” Ron said dropping a bag of sweets in front of Harry jarring them both from thought. Harry thanked him and conversation went on about the tri wizard tournament and the golden egg. After about an hour they left with Ron babbling happily. “Before we go I want to grab Pig some owl treats.”

“Good idea Hedwig has been working over time.” Harry said laughing he walked ahead of them opening the door to the small pet shop for their group. Sirius stepped in and immediately turned around leaving he was pretty sure he forgot something at the Three Broomsticks. “Sirius?”

“I think I left something at the pub.” He said, “I’ll catch up.”

“Sirius I checked the table before we left. Nothing was there.” Hermione said kindly. He stared puzzled at the ground, he really felt like he forgot something. “Come on, you can help me pick out a new toy for Crookshanks.”

“Alright.” He said stepping threw again only to turn around horrified. “I think I left the oven on at home. I need to go back.”

“Sirius you weren’t even cooking when I arrived.” Harry said concerned, “Are you ok?”

Sirius blinked a few times Harry was right he wasn’t cooking. He shook his head out moving towards the door when Ron grabbed him. “No don’t! You’ll give yourself a headache bloody anti squib wards.”

“What?” Harry asked as Ron pointed at the door frame showing off runes carved in it.

“They’re making him think he forgot something. To keep him from coming in.” Ron explained, “At least these ones aren’t violent.”

“That’s barbaric.” Hermione said horror in her voice. Sirius fidgeted uncomfortable stepping back, his kind was so lowly they’d bar him from a damn pet shop.

“You lot in or out.” A woman growled coming to the door, “Stop letting the fire out!”

Hermione snapped, “You’re runes are horrid.”

The woman looked up at the runes then back to their group. “Oh hush its only to keep out a squib from the castle he scares away real customers. Foul man. Besides as a bonus no other nasty squibs enter and dirty up my shop.”

Sirius blanched at this while his friends stiffened. Ron scoffed at her, while Harry started seething. He reached out taking Hermione’s arm as she opened her mouth he feared a verbal tirade.

“Please let’s go.” He asked, he didn’t want to be here anymore. He was already stressed enough, he couldn’t take this too.

“I’m never shopping here again!” Hermione snapped making the shop keep snort slamming the door.

“It’s alright.” Sirius pacified holding her arm. “It’s not a big deal. I’m used to it.”

“It’s not alright Sirius.” Harry said softly, “People shouldn’t treat you this way.”

Sirius stared at them as they nodded agreement, he didn’t like this. He just wanted to get away from here now before something else happened. He gave them his sweetest look innocently smiling at them hoping they would be distracted, “Can we go to Scriveshaft’s Quill Shop? I’d really like to get more parchment for sketching.”

“Of course Sirius.” Harry said after a moment smiling at him. He reached out trying to wrap an arm around him to lead him away. Sirius stiffened, he didn’t want to be touched but this was Harry. Harry wouldn’t hurt him, Harry was his friend. Right…

**********

Sirius woke up a gasping, he rolled over frustrated smearing his tears on his pillow. He could feel the ghost of those hands roaming him, touching him, forcing their way into him. He rolled over and over trying to will himself back to sleep but it wasn’t working. He gave up and crawled out of bed he knew he was too old, he did, but he really wanted company. He crept down the hall to Severus and Remus’s room he pushed open the door only to enter an empty room. He cursed they must both be on patrol tonight which was unusual but sometimes they did overlap by and hour or two. He paced back to his room but could not bring himself to get back in bed, he changed and snuck out.

He crept down the halls quietly, hoping to see someone he knew that could point him towards them. He looked to his right swearing he heard his name when he nearly stepped on Mrs. Norris as she scurried in front of him on a landing.

“What are you doing out of bed?” Filch yelled running up to him, making Sirius flinch backwards, the older man stilled. “Oh it’s you.”

“I’m sorry I was just looking for Severus and Remus.” He stammered out quickly. “I-I didn’t want to be alone.”

“Nightmares?” Filch said his voice softening just the slightest bit, as Sirius nodded. Mr. Filch grumbled looking at him, before his eyes swiveled around suspiciously. “I haven’t seen either of them. Now go back to bed. Come Mrs. Norris we have work to do, tomorrow we will get you treats from Hogsmeade.”

Sirius sighed watching them go. He turned intending to walk off when he heard his name being whispered. He looked around seeing Harry appear from nowhere holding his golden egg and a cloak. He raised his brows at him as Harry smiled.

“Invisibility cloak, it was my dad’s.” Harry said coming into step with him.

“I know, I almost gave James and Reggie heart attacks when I hid us under it once.” Sirius said smirking. “To be fair I was making us a fort.”

Harry laughed, he nudged him smiling a light flush on his face. “So why are you out so late?”

“I’m looking for my guardians.” He said shrugging, “Why are you up?”

“Cedric recommended I take the egg in the prefect’s bath with me. Want to come?” Harry asked, Sirius blushed. “I’d make us swim suits!”

“Alright, but I don’t know how I’ll be able to help. I can’t hear it.” Sirius said following Harry into the bathroom.

He sat on a bench watching Harry fill the gigantic tub and transfigure two swimsuits. He furrowed his brow slipping in the stall to change. He stood there afraid to come out. He had so many scars, not just little ones, big ones, burn marks and patches where his skin was completely discolored. He sucked on his lip, he shouldn’t have agreed to this. He tried to remember what Remus told him about his scars. He took a deep breath and slipped out carefully catching Harry’s turned back, he had scars too. He cocked his head, they weren’t as massive as his, or even as many but Sirius knew a belt buckle scar when he saw one. In a sick way it made him feel less alone seeing Harry’s marks.

Harry glanced at him smiling, gesturing him over they slipped into the oversized tub. Sirius kind of liked this room, a mermaid painting, a swimming pool sized tub that was bejeweled and lots of bubbles. It was nice. He sunk into the warm water sighing as Harry sat next to him fiddling with the egg.

“I’m afraid to open it.” Harry admitted, looking at him. “It’s so loud, it hurts my ears.”

“Well put it under the water that will snuff out the sound.” Sirius said turning to him.

“Great idea. Come on.” Harry held his breath dunking under, Sirius sighed following him under. Harry opened the egg eyes widening, Sirius just cocked his head, looking at the beautiful lights the egg admitted. He surfaced, followed quickly by Harry. “Brilliant Sirius!”

“Why? Can’t hear anything remember.” Sirius said as Harry set the egg down, moving about the bath.

“I have to reclaim something from the merpeople in the lake.” Harry said smiling. “Thank you Sirius, you’ve been such a help.”

“No problem.” Sirius said shyly looking down as Harry swam up to him sitting very close so their legs where almost touching.

“Sirius, I need to tell you something. I really did want to ask you, to go to the Yule Ball with me.” Sirius stared at him. Harry wanted to go with him, that couldn’t be right. “I know you thought I was playing a trick on you. But I wasn’t… I- I like you.”

He just stared at Harry confused as the other leaned in kissing his lips softly. Now Sirius understood, Harry liked him the way Markus did, the way Barrick did. He closed his eyes leaning in, it’s not like he had a choice, squibs can’t say no. Harry seemed encouraged by this pulling him onto his lap. Sirius started to think of other things, the way the water was warm, how the soft bubbles felt popping against his skin.

Harry rocked his hips just the slightest bit beginning to grind against his ass, Sirius felt his face crumple he really thought Harry was his friend. He guessed he was stupid for thinking that he wouldn’t hurt him too. He was pulled back as Harry looked at him concerned, “Sirius, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing… I’m fine.” Sirius said giving him a smile. He wouldn’t fall for this, he didn’t want to be hit, he was a good squib.

“Are you sure we can stop if you want.” Harry said, Sirius froze. He would stop? He would stop if he wanted. He snorted that was a lie, nobody had ever stopped before when he _asked_ , when he _begged_ , when he _cried_ , when he _screamed_. Harry continued talking softly, stroking hair behind his ear as Sirius flinched. “Are you sure you’re ok? Sirius you can tell me no, I won’t be mad.”

Sirius leaned back at this, he felt like he got hit by a confudle hex. He couldn’t say no. Squibs weren’t supposed to say no. Why was Harry doing this? Why was he confusing him? Why was he trying to get him in trouble? Did he want an excuse to hurt him? Sirius didn’t understand. He was just trying to be a good squib! He looked around the room frustrated, as Harry sat up looking at him furious.

“What did you say?” Harry demanded, Sirius looked at him confused. “That you’re trying to be a good squib.”

“I am a good squib!” Sirius cried flinching back as Harry’s eyes widened. “Good squibs don’t say no! I didn’t say no to Markus! I’m not saying no to you! So why are you telling me to say it! I don’t want to be a bad squib! I’m not a bad squib!”

Sirius reached up holding his head repeating his words, he knew he was spiraling. He knew it was getting bad. He hadn’t freaked out like this in a long time but he hadn’t been hurt like this in a long time. He scrambled off Harry, hauling himself out of the tub. Now he was really being a bad squib. He was definitely being a bad squib but he didn’t care he grabbed his clothes off the floor running for the door.

“Sirius!” Harry yelled.

Sirius reached for the bathroom door opening it but it slammed shut right out of his hand. Sirius’s panic doubled, he tried the handle but it was locked. His heart started beating wildly, not again. Not again. “Let me out! Please don’t lock me away! Let me out!”

“Sirius! I’m sorry! I didn’t mean too!” Harry yelled scrambling to the door using his wand to unlock it. Sirius backed away from him. No, no, this was a trap. Harry said it was ok to stop but when he tried to leave he was locked in. He sunk to the floor hiding his face in his knees, body shaking. He had been bad, he was a bad squib. Harry tried to get close, Sirius held his clothes up covering himself like a shield. The clothes were pulled from his hands and at first he panicked but he felt them sliding into place on his body as Harry held up his wand dressing them.

“Please, just get it over with. I’m a bad squib!”

“You’re not a bad squib- person! You’re not a bad _person_ Sirius.” Harry said voice getting softer, Sirius stared at him before he shook his head.

“Yes I am.” Sirius whispered looking at Harry through his lashes. “I’m a squib. I’ve always been taught I can’t say no. That I have to serve those that are better than me. That’s what squibs are good for, being lower than a house elf, being used for potions parts, or if someone wants to-” He cut himself off. If he didn’t think about it, it didn’t happen.

“Sirius, that doesn’t make you a bad person. I’ve lived with my aunt and uncle basically my whole life. They don’t treat me well, I cook and clean, they bully me, my cousin beats me up and goes ‘Harry Hunting’. They locked me in a cupboard under the stairs, put bars on my window-”

“But you’re not a squib.” Sirius said turning to him fully.

“Doesn’t matter.” Harry said, sitting next to him. “They hate magic. I’ve been treated badly my whole life and every summer when I go home it starts up again. So I know what it feels like, to feel helpless and like you can’t talk to anyone about it. But Sirius you can always talk to me. Or Regulus, Lupin, Snape and Hermione. And you can. You absolutely can say no.”

Sirius looked at the ground for a long time, before finally whispering. “I asked him to stop… I told him I didn’t want to. I asked him to please stop. I did! I really did!”

“I believe you.” Harry said touching his shoulder. “Sirius, it’s not your fault.”

It was like a dam broke, Sirius found himself clinging to Harry, telling him everything. He told him about what his life was like at home in the Black house, what Markus did to him and every awful thing Mr. Barrick forced him to do. He cried and told him about when Regulus was arrested, how he was taken away by his mother. About how when his parents died he bounced between the Malfoy’s and Barrick’s house. He told him things he’d never told anyone, not even Regulus. Harry just held him the whole time letting him get it all out.

When he finally ran out of things to say, and his throat was dry from crying, his eyes red and tear tracks marred his face, he expected Harry to push him away. He expected him not to care about the pathetic, used, dirty little squib but Harry looked at him softly. He just kept patting his back and holding him. Sirius sat back a little to see Harry’s face better, Harry smiled gently at him in reassurance.

“I’m sorry this happened to you.” Harry said, “You didn’t deserve it. But I’ll be here now, whenever you need me.”

Sirius’s breath hitched holding the other teen tighter. It was scary how good it felt to finally tell someone. Once he had worn himself out Harry walked him back to his room, supporting the exhausted teen the whole way. He begged Harry to promise to never repeat anything, Harry did. Before he left, Harry reached over giving him a tight hug, kissing his cheek. Sirius was shocked at first, he figured Harry wouldn’t be interested after what he had told him. He also both wanted him interested and wanted space.

“Goodnight Sirius, I’ll be here when you’re ready.” Harry said squeezing him in his hug, with a smile he left.

Sirius fumbled his way into his guardian’s quarters holding where Harry had kissed him with a blush to his face. He hurried to his room changing into pajamas and climbing into bed, he was exhausted emotionally and physically. His eyes started to droop when the door opened letting Remus in. He blinked at him tired a little afraid he’d be in trouble as the man walked in.

“Hey, you had us worried, it’s almost four A.M. We getting ready to look for you.” He reached down tucking the covers around Sirius, “I’m glad you had a good talk with Harry. I hope it made you feel better, goodnight Padfoot.”

**********

Sirius felt lighter over the past few weeks, having Harry know and truly understand him was a really spectacular feeling. He would talk to him once in a while about it never much only little things. They were also closer than ever before, Harry made him feel safe and cared for. Not to mention that Harry had kissed his cheek and said he’d be there when he was ready. It was a really nice feeling, he didn’t push him for anything, he just would smile and be his normal nice self, if not a little extra protective.

He stood in front of Minerva, Severus and Dumbledore with Hermione and Cho as he looked up at the teachers curiously. Hermione cleared her throat, “You wanted to see us Professors?”

“Indeed,” Dumbledore said. “Tomorrow morning is the second challenge of the tri wizard tournament. In this challenge the champions must retrieve something special the merpeople have ‘stolen’. The thing they retrieve is a person. Normally their date from the Yule Ball.”

“Umm excuse me but why am I here then?” Sirius asked, “I wasn’t Harry’s date.”

“No, but I believe Harry sees you as his most precious friend. We were going to originally ask Mr. Weasley but we noticed yours and Harry’s new closeness and thought you the better choice.” Dumbledore said a twinkle in his eyes making Sirius hide his face in his hands horrified as Severus smirked at him amused. Dumbledore continued, “Now then, if you are all willing, I’d like to place you under a sleeping charm. You will be placed under water, and the champions will have to rescue you.”

“Professor, how will we breathe?” Hermione asked.

“A potion, provided by Professor Snape.” Dumbledore said, “They will be spelled into you when the time comes.”

“What if they don’t rescue us in time?” Cho asked.

“Do not fear Ms. Chang.” Minerva said, “We have ways to get you back and the merpeople will not harm you.”

“Alright, I’ll do it.” Hermione said.

“Me too.” Cho said smiling.

“Sirius?” Dumbledore asked.

Sirius looked at him before turning to Severus, “Will it work on me?”

“Of course it will work on you.” Severus said softly, “If you’re uncomfortable you can say no. We won’t force you.”

Sirius paused, now Severus was telling him he could say no too. He rocked on his feet in thought before looking up, Hermione gave him a reassuring smile. He looked at Dumbledore nodding. “I’ll do it.”

“Splendid!” Dumbledore said removing his wand, Sirius started to flinch but stopped breathing deep. “I need you three to close your eyes.”

**********

Ron hadn’t been the nicest to him lately mad that he was now considered Harry’s best mate and not him. Sirius however didn’t care he kind of thought it was funny, he’d never had a wizard jealous of him before. He was walking with Harry to join the others in the great hall for lunch when a voice sounded behind them.

“Oh Mr. Potter- Whoo-hoo!”

“It’s Rita Skeeter that obnoxious reporter, don’t turn around.” Harry whispered grabbing him when he tried to look. A closet door in front of them opened and they were quickly shoved in by the overzealous reporter. Harry bristled at her breathing heavy.

“Haha perfect.” She said joining them shutting the door, her quick quotes quill and notebook floating up ready. “I’m glad I caught you Harry. You and your-” She looked at Sirius. “Yes what are you?”

Sirius looked down at himself confused by the question, “I’m Sirius.”

“No darling you don’t look serious. You look cute, muggle really.” She said smacking her lips looking at Harry, Sirius just blinked owlishly at her. “So tell me Harry for an update article on the champions what went through your mind seeing your precious- right what’s the name?”

“Sirius.” He said again.

“Yes seriously.” She said tossing her head eyes rolling, Harry started to talk but she interrupted him. “Never mind. Harry what went through your mind seeing your precious squib helpless under water?”

“Harry.” Sirius said looking at him mortified.

“Right- He has a name, he’s not just a squib. I’m not doing an article with you again. Come on _Sirius_ lets go.” Harry said making to push past her, he glanced at the quick quotes quill. “And he’s not looking at me like I’m some hero- cross that out!”

Sirius glanced at the paper managing to read, ‘The puppy eyed squib was too afraid to say his name. Though he looked at the courageous Harry Potter as a hero that saved him from certain doom.’ His face twisted up at this trying to read more when Harry grabbed his hand practically running to get away from Rita Skeeter.

Thanks to Skeeter’s article he actually had started getting a lot of attention lately, he had gone from worthless squib to Harry Potter’s squib. Harry hated it and Sirius was increasingly becoming stressed. He was used to being ignored and whispered about, being basically referred to as a possession wasn’t new to him. Though for some horrible reason he had seemingly become public property people kept trying to touch him. Petting his hair, touching his clothes, poking his scars and one person had even grabbed his face to see his ‘puppy eyes’ making him panic, Hermione hexed that man away.

They had just sat down to lunch when a seventh year Gryffindor had come up tugging hard on Sirius’s leather jacket making him stiffen. “Aww, he does dress like a muggle.”

“Excuse me, don’t touch him.” Harry said sternly, making the seventh year and her friends look up.

“He doesn’t mind.” She defended letting go to cross her arms, Sirius sighed in relief leaning forwards. “I just like the way he’s dressed.”

“Harry, where did you buy it?” A Ravenclaw boy asked looking at Harry.

“It was my brothers-”

Sirius was cut off by a second boy. “Potter probably doesn’t know. One of his guardians probably got it for him.”

“Stop talking about him like he isn’t here!” Harry yelled, making the trio look at him. “If you want to know just ask him.”

“Aww Harry you’re so protective of _your_ squib.” The girl said giving a laugh. Harry and Hermione rounded on them chasing them off with cruel words and threats. While Ron and Sirius shared a confused look.

“Ignore them.” Harry said reaching across the table taking Sirius’s hand. Sirius shrugged, he didn’t really have a choice. He opened the letter delivered to him from Regulus, he sighed showing it to Harry. Regulus had apparently framed the article about them because it was just ‘so hilarious’ and he ‘loved it’.

**********

Sirius had continued helping Remus with grounds keeping, he really did like it. He felt so fulfilled having something to do all day even if it was small. He slammed his shovel into the spring ground digging holes for new fencing for the gardens while Remus levitated fencing back and forth.

“Looks good.” Remus said patting his back. “Siri why don’t you take a break, your friend is coming.”

Sirius looked up, instantly he felt pale his body doing a light tremor as Markus walked towards them smiling. He immediately turned back to his work as Remus started to walk away. He didn’t want him to leave him with Markus. He stutter out a sentence, “Remus is- is this hole good?”

Remus chuckled walking back. “Looks fine.”

“Ok, I’ll get started on a new one.” Sirius said desperate to keep the conversation going, to keep Remus here. “Where should the next one be?”

“Oh about here.” Remus said leading him a few feet away as Markus closed in on them. “Don’t worry about it take a break with your friend.”

Sirius started to ask him something else when Markus spoke, “Hello little rebel. We haven’t talked in so long. How have you been?”

Sirius licked his lips watching Remus retreat heading towards Hagrid’s where the rest of the fencing was. He glanced around, he was alone now with Markus and the other teen knew it. He tried to ignore the way his hands sweat as he stepped back holding his shovel, maybe if he acted busy he would leave. The other stepped in his way forcing him back a step.

“I asked you a question Sirios.” He said reaching for his chin, Sirius’s eyes widened and again he moved back. Markus smirked stepping into him again. “I really liked our time at the Yule Ball. I didn’t think I’d miss you but I do. Come, let’s go for a walk of the forest. We’ll have some more _fun_ yes?”

Sirius swallowed hard, glancing to see if Remus was back. Harry told him he could say no, Severus told him to slap or punch someone if they didn’t accept no. He felt his eyes water he shook his head no.

“What? You don’t say no to me.” He said cocking his head with a glare. Sirius didn’t care, he didn’t want to do _that_ again. He tightened his grip on his shovel, he just wanted to help Remus and dig the holes for the fence post. He turned backing away, trying to walk to a new spot, his heart beating wildly. The ground jerked and spun, he quickly found himself facing Markus his wand out.

“Please stop, I just want to do my work…” Sirius muttered staring at the ground.

“Come, you don’t say no to me.” Markus said sternly grabbing his upper arm leading him.

Sirius didn’t want to go, his face crumpled. He yanked his arm free. “Please don’t touch me. I don’t want to go.”

Markus whirled on him, grabbing his arm hard enough to bruise, “It’s not an option squib!”

“ _No_! Don’t touch me!” Sirius screamed, squeezing his eyes shut and swinging his arms up to free himself.

A sharp crack broke through the air followed by a nasty thud. Sirius opened his eyes seeing Markus on the ground groaning the side of his face red and already getting puffy blood coming from his nose and ear. Sirius blinked a few times, hands twisting on his shovel confused, then it hit him. He looked at the shovel in his hands, he’d just smacked Markus’s head with a shovel. He tossed it to the ground horrified.

“Y-you filthy little squib! You’re dead! I-I’ll have you in- Azkaban for this!” Markus yelled through tears as Sirius backed away. Markus kept yelling insults and threats as Sirius’s eyes widened. He’d attacked a wizard, he would go to Azkaban, or worse, they could kill him. Markus had his eyes closed mouth bleeding, “Help me! Help!”

Sirius held himself, he didn’t mean to he just wanted him to go away. With a flash of a silver patronus he looked up seeing Remus running towards them. Remus would get rid of him, he was a bad squib. He had said no, then attacked a wizard _. It felt good_. No it was bad he reminded himself. _Markus deserved it_.

He looked up his eyes wide as Remus neared. Oh no, he couldn’t do this. Sirius turned around and ran. He ran straight into the forbidden forest. He heard Remus calling his name but he did not want to be caught. The branches and brambles scratched his face and clothes but he would not stop. His mum had told him what happens to bad squibs, to squibs that don’t listen and don’t do as they’re told, who say no, it was all horrible and he had hurt a wizard. He couldn’t go back they’d kill him for sure he knew it, or life in Azkaban.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sirius said 'no'! He finally said it! He literally hasn't said no in years. My poor baby...  
> Please let me know what you think! :)


	17. Chapter 17

“No! Don’t touch me!”

Remus’s head swiveled at Sirius’s yell and the cracking noise followed soon after. He stopped his spell dropping the fence bolting towards him immediately. Merlin what had that boy done to his Sirius. He saw one figure laying on the ground and Sirius looking so scared at the shovel in his hands.

“Y-you filthy little squib! You’re dead! I-I’ll have you in- Azkaban for this!” Markus screamed.

Remus saw the range of emotions flashing over Sirius’s face as Markus yelled the vilest things at him. He had to get down there now, he sent a patronus off and tried to quicken his pace. When Sirius saw him he looked terrified and so confused. Then he turned around and ran into the forbidden forest. Remus panicked now sprinting and yelling his name.

“Sirius! Sirius come back!” He yelled hurtling over the other boy and running into the woods. “Sirius it’s ok! Come back! Come back!”

Remus had lost Sirius hours ago, he’d tried tracking him but nothing was working. He squatted down in misery, holding the teen’s boots. Sirius had abandoned them, he knew about the tracking charms and had abandoned his own boots to stay hidden. A silvery wolf bound in front of him, Severus wanted him back he sighed standing and quickly apparated outside Hogwarts grounds.

Severus approached him worried but Remus just shook his head holding up the boots. He couldn’t look at Severus, he lost their boy. He lost their Sirius. He knew Sirius wasn’t their child but Merlin damn it he felt like a parent. Severus didn’t say anything but led him inside and towards Dumbledore’s office.

A rather large dog bounded towards them the second they entered before clear disappointment crossed his face. Dumbledore looked up sadly, Karakroff the Drumstrang Headmaster looked angry and Moody looked, well like Moody. Dumbledore breathed deeply looking at them as they sat in the other available chairs, the dog flopping down at their feet with a whine.

“Where is the squib? I want him arrested.” Karakroff snapped making Snuffles growl.

“Now Karakroff-”

“No.” He snarled interrupting Dumbledore, “He attacked my student viciously. Markus is at St. Mungo’s he can’t feel his legs! The squib attacked him in cold blood, we all heard Markus’s story.”

“What was his story might I ask?” Remus said narrowing his eyes as Karakroff snorted.

“Markus wanted to talk to him and the boy hit him with the shovel so Markus screamed for help. But you ignored him.” He said like Remus was dirt.

“Really? Because I heard Sirius yelling ‘No. Don’t touch me.’ Then Markus was hit.” Remus said through gritted teeth leaning his elbows onto his knees. “Albus please, we need to get looking it’s going to be dark soon. I couldn’t find him. We need to look.”

“Indeed, I have Hagrid combing the forest now, along with an arour search party. And of course we will begin looking ourselves immediately.” Dumbledore said.

Karakroff opened his mouth when the door to the office flew open as Harry ran in wide eyed. “Is it true? Is it true Sirius ran away?”

“Harry.” Dumbledore said holding up his hands. “I’m sorry my boy now isn’t a good time.”

“We need to look for him!” Harry cried looking at the teachers, “He could get hurt.”

“Hurt? Bah!” Karakroff said, “He would deserve it after what he did to Markus.”

“Markus deserved anything Sirius did to him!” Harry yelled pointing his wand at Karakroff making the whole room jump. Snuffles ran in front of Harry growling protectively as Karakroff pointed his wand back.

“What do you mean?” Severus asked ever the calm one, though he had stood wand at the ready.

Harry bit his lip, “I promised I wouldn’t tell.”

“Now’s the right time to tell.” Moody said stepping forwards placing a hand on Harry’s shoulder. “And put you’re bloody wands down!”

Harry looked unsure but a nudge and a whine from Snuffles had him looking up frustrated. “At the Yule Ball, Markus- he hurt Sirius. He hurt him really bad… He’s terrified of him.”

“This is insane.” Karakroff said throwing his hands up. “Markus is a good student and nice young man with a promising future, he would never hurt a little squib.”

“How did he hurt him?” Severus asked, Remus clenched his hands tightly as Snuffles gave him a desperate look. Harry shook his head no. Severus took a step forward turning Harry forcing him to look him in the eyes. “How did he hurt my Sirius?”

Harry’s eyes widened and Remus knew even if Harry didn’t speak Severus got the answer. His husband jerked back a look of horrified disgust on his face. Harry just stuttered out that it wasn’t his place to say but Remus and Dumbledore were watching Severus. His husband took a deep breath collected himself, then snatched Karakroff by the upper arm and dragged him out of the room without a word. Moody eyed the room before following after the two men.

“What just happened?” Harry asked looking around.

“Nothing to worry about Harry.” Remus said dying to know what Severus saw and also what kind of verbal beat down his husband was giving Karakroff.

“Indeed.” Dumbledore said waving his hand shutting and locking his door, a second wave and a silencing spell went up.

Immediately Regulus switched to human form grabbing Dumbledore’s robes. “We need to find him! He doesn’t have magic. He’s all alone!”

“Regulus.” Remus said, making the man turn to him. His friend freed himself from Dumbledore clinging to him desperately instead. Remus wrapped his arms around him. “Oh Regulus I’m so sorry. We’ll find him.”

“I failed him!” Regulus cried, “I failed him again! I need to find him. I need to help him. He needs me!”

“We’ll start a new search right away.” Remus said.

“I want to go too.” Harry said worried his face scrunching up. Seeing this Regulus moved to his godson holding him tightly.

“It will be ok.” Regulus said trying to sound comforting as he rubbed his back.

*******

Sirius woke up in pain, it wasn’t the first time he’d slept on dirt but it was the first time he had in at least three almost four years. He crawled stiffly out from under the fallen tree, he really wasn’t sure what to do with himself. He stood rubbing his arms and started walking, his feet were sore without his boots but he didn’t want them to find him. He knew Severus had tracking charms on all his shoes.

He skidded down the hill trying not to trip or hurt his feet any worse than they already where. He was hungry, he had gotten used to eating on a normal schedule. He rubbed his face starting to sob. He should have just gone with Markus, it would have hurt but then he could have stayed with his friends. He could have stayed with Remus and Severus, he could keep seeing Regulus. He could have maybe been with Harry. He dropped to his knees holding himself, he should have just been a good squib and not said no.

*******

Remus was beside himself with worry. Regulus and Severus had disappeared into the woods in animagi form. Hagrid was searching the forest with Hermione and Ron, Moody and even Dumbledore had gone traversing the woods. They also had a small auror search team though he figured that may do more harm than good but they had to try. He was here with Harry as they walked in painful silence.

He really wasn’t sure what Severus said, he wasn’t sure if he wanted to know but both Karakroff and Markus had gone from demanding blood to quiet as a mouse. He looked at Harry, he wanted to know. Severus had refused to tell them saying that it should be Sirius’s choice but Regulus had put something together and Harry confirmed it privately. He too had come to a collusion but was afraid of what the answer would be.

Finally he couldn’t take it, he cleared his throat making Harry look at him. He cocked his head, “Professor?”

“Harry you don’t need to tell me details but, just tell me if I’m right.” Remus said taking a deep breath. “Did Markus abuse him… sexually?”

Harry looked at the ground bitterly, Remus had his answer. He cursed how could he have been so blind. He had found the dress robes shoved under his bed and when asked, Sirius hadn’t been able to answer. He assumed it was an accident since Sirius is a neat freak or maybe he had a little to drink. He thought about it more, Sirius wouldn’t sit at the table for a week after the Yule Ball. How didn’t he notice? He glared at the ground, there were signs but Sirius was abused in the past he thought his issues where just resurfacing.

He blanched remembering when he first found Sirius how when he opened his robes to hide him he’d tried to cover himself. Or how afraid he was to be given a bath, no afraid to be naked. His eyebrows rose, he was afraid of beds. He had a feeling back then but Sirius never mentioned it so he just assumed otherwise. Oh Merlin, he covered his face eyes starting to water. Sirius had no idea how to talk about it, probably because no one ever cared before. Not to mention he had horrible trust issues. So when Markus had him in that field he must have been so scared he had just snapped. Remus vowed then and there to do better for him, to be better for his pup.

*******

Sirius’s head whipped up at the approaching galloping noise. Centaurs, he thought running to a tree. He grabbed the lowest branch heaving himself up and up as the horse hoofs stopped below him. He glanced down seeing two staring at him, one stood up on its back legs reaching at him. He scrambled up even higher just in case. They stomped their hoofs glaring at him as he hugged the tree.

“Please- just leave me alone.” He cried, turning his face inwards.

“You aren’t welcome here wizard.” One said shifting the weapon on his back.

“I’m not a wizard, I’m a squib. Wizards don’t want me either.” He said eyeing the weapon carefully.

The second one walked closer, putting his arm up making the other lower his weapon. “You shouldn’t enter our forest. There are many dangers. My name is Firenze, why don’t you come down little one.”

“Don’t call me that!” He snapped, Mr. Barrick’s sick smile and cold hands coming to the front of his mind. He cursed, if he didn’t think about it, it didn’t happen. A tickle by his ear had him a shaking his head, he looked down at them blinking slowly. He should probably be nicer to them so they don’t kill him, “Sorry… My name’s Sirius. I didn’t have a choice about entering your forest. I defended myself and they’ll kill me for it. I can never go back, I don’t want them to find me.”

“Come down.” Firenze said, “We won’t hurt you. But you need to come down now. Or you will die.”

Sirius furrowed his brow. The centaur, took off his weapon tossing it away as a show of good faith as he gestured to the ground. Sirius felt something in his hair, he gave it a little shake hopping to dislodge any bugs before climbing down. He was halfway to the ground when the centaur stood up on its back legs grabbing him he pulled him down quick. Sirius started to panic he didn’t want to be touched, a hand started combing his hair, he kicked back and was dropped.

The first one growled. “Filthy little-”

“Stop!” Firenze said before he reached down lifting him to his feet. “This was in your hair.”

He held out his fist showing off a hand sized green spiked butterfly with a soft blue underside, with a small wolfs skull head hissing at them. Sirius grabbed the back of his hair, “That was in my hair! What is that?”

“Your kind calls it a Swooping Evil. Our kind call them Death Fliers.” Firenze said, holding it tight in his fist. “They eat brains. That’s why I needed you down so quickly. There is a nest in that tree this one is a baby not able to fly, but it would have killed you all the same.”

Sirius nodded as Firenze began squeezing it making it shriek. He covered his mouth horrified, as the thing screamed, it made a little pop. Sirius couldn’t take it he grabbed the centaur’s hand making him freeze. “Please stop! You’re killing it!”

“That would be the point.” The first centaur said. “It will grow bigger more deadly.”

“You have a kind heart. However it is a mistake to let it live.” Firenze said softly.

“That’s what people have said about me.” Sirius said face twisting. “Please just let it go.”

Firenze opened his hand, the little creature limped about sadly. Sirius reached out picking the small thing up, both centaurs flinched at this. However Sirius was gentle, he rubbed its head and back with his fingers, trying to mimic Regulus when he calmed him. Firenze reached out touching its wing. “I’m afraid I broke it. It may never fly, it’s no longer good.”

“I won’t learn magic but Harry says I’m still good.” Sirius said as the thing turned into an acorn sized spiky green cocoon. “Don’t eat my brain ok? I know people that can fix you.”

He tucked the cocoon into his pocket as Firenze spoke. “You know Harry Potter?”

“Do not start with this!” The other centaur yelled, “You are soft! Soft in the head! You should have killed the Death Flier, and we should be chasing this boy away not having a chat with him!”

He turned to Sirius rearing up slamming the ground by his bare feet making him jump back. Firenze stood in front of Sirius, “Enough, we do not need to fight everyone that wanders into the woods.”

“Get out of the way!” The first one barked stamping his feet, Sirius backed away wide eyed.

“Run!” Firenze yelled as he kept getting in the way of the angry centaur. Sirius didn’t need to be told twice, he turned on his heel and fled.

*******

Remus held his hand to his chest tears in his eyes. The search party, with the exception of Regulus and Severus had come back for the second night. He sat there sniffling watching the forest. Harry had gone back broken hearted, promising to be up bright and early. He rubbed his face in misery. He sent off a patronus to his husband begging for news, he cursed he could follow a patronus to his husband but not to Sirius. Sirius had no magic for the patronus to locate.

Two nights in the forest that was insanity, normal wizards would have a hard time with one night. Worse still the last challenge of the tri wizard cup was in two days. All the searching would stop then. Who would care to look for a lost squib when you could watch wizards duke it out over a cup, he thought bitterly.

He saw something small and black running towards him. He gripped his wand before sighing as his husbands animagi form dove in his lap panting. He twisted the black fox around holding him gently as he pet the fur. “Where’s Regulus?”

He looked down seeing a sleepy head shake no. Remus sighed. “Oh Severus, if I ever get my hands on that boy I’m never letting him go.”

*******

Sirius snuggled deeper into the warmth around him. Warmth? He was in a forest. He sat up looking around, he glanced behind him seeing nothing but he felt warm. He reached out, there was something solid, but he didn’t see anything. He felt around a little more, it felt bony and fleshy. He knew a dementor wasn’t warm, so it couldn’t be that. He felt lower that felt like a wing. He moved back up, moving along towards the front of the creature. He could hear it breathing softly. He must have found a head, since it pushed into his hand enjoying his pats.

“Ok, hi.” He said racking his brain for invisible winged creatures or something a squib couldn’t see. Some part of his mind said thestral as he rubbed the invisible head. “Thanks for keeping me warm.”

He stumbled to his feet, he checked his pocket feeling the cocoon unravel accepting his pats. He removed his hand feeling it curl up, apparently it was fine. He careful felt his way free of the thestral circle.

“Alright, I’m going to go now.” He said awkwardly to the nothingness in front of him. “Bye.”

He spent the next few hours wandering around till he found some water, he dropped to his knees bringing it to his face happily. He poked his pocket, pulling out the cocoon by its tail. It uncurled lapped the water then limply crawled up his arm.

“I’m telling you now, we will have a problem if you try to eat my brain.” Sirius said feeling it hook little claws into his earlobe. He was starting to get worried feeling its weight shift. He brought his hand up but the thing had made its acorn sized cocoon again hanging from his earlobe like a spiky green earing. He crossed his arms, “Yeah whatever that’s fine.”

*******

“You know I used to want to be an auror. Back when I thought I might still be a wizard.” Sirius said, swinging his walking stick into a bush. “I thought my parents were so awful. Still do mind you. But I at least when I was little I thought they loved me. It took me a surprisingly long time to realize how much they hated me.”

Sirius scrambled over the down log, popping another berry in his mouth. “I think some part of me though if my magic came they’d love me again. But it didn’t come. I was never good enough. I’m just a bad squib. So- Now I live in the woods. And I talk to my pet earing.”

Sirius tried to see his little companion from the corner of his eye. “Sometimes I hate it here… I don’t mean the forest though. I mean the magical world. Every time something good happens to me it feels like something bad will happen ten times over. I got stunted for years, I’m only physically fifteen but I’m actually like- geez I don’t even know. I think in my thirties. I’ve been cut up for potions parts, locked up, beaten, raped-”

He stopped, he’d never actually said that out loud before. He shook his head, if he didn’t think about it, it didn’t happen. But it did happen. It had happened a lot if he was being honest. Barrick had repeatedly used him for years and when he finally thought he was free Markus used him. He wiped his face.

“You know, I was always told ‘squibs can’t say no’. But Harry told me I could say no. Severus told me I could hit someone if they didn’t accept it. But ya’know…” He paused scratching his friend making him uncurl purring lightly at the scratches before curling back as Sirius stopped. He breathed deeply, “Ya’know saying no and hitting that piece of shit. That was the greatest feeling ever. For a split second I felt like I was in control… Then it was gone.”

“It sucks too. I was actually getting a really good life.” Sirius said blinking back tears. “I had really good friends. Harry, Hermione, Remus and Severus. Not to mention my amazing little brother, Regulus... I miss them, I wish I could go back, just for them... But I can’t.”

*******

Remus bit his lip searching the forest alone. Harry had been dragged away to do the tournament, Dumbledore had to oversee it, Moody had to help in it and Severus had to be present there as well though he had waited till the last possible second to leave. Only he and Regulus where still able to search. Remus cursed, day fives sun was literally setting along with his hopes of seeing his Sirius alive again. He feared at this point they could be looking for a body.

Crashing sounded to his right he whirled wand out only to see a centaur running towards him. Remus steeled himself, he could talk his way out if he was lucky. The centaur stopped in front of him looking at him curiously, Remus spoke. “I mean you know harm. I’m only here looking for my- Sirius.”

“I have seen your Sirius. He did not want to be found the last time I spoke to him.” He said crossing his arms. “He’s afraid your kind will hurt him.”

“He’s alive… Please! I don’t want to hurt him. I love him. He’s a very dear friend. He’s like a son to me.” Remus begged, “Will you take me to him, or tell him Remus loves him and we are all worried and looking for him. He’s not in trouble, we just want him home.”

“Remus,” He said softly, “My name is Firenze. I have not seen him in a few days but if I do, I’ll tell him.

“Where was he?” Remus asked, “Can you take me there?”

Firenze nodded, “I can but it’s getting late. You’re kind really isn’t welcomed here.”

“I’m a werewolf! My kind belongs here. Now please, take me to where you last saw him.” Remus begged Firenze nodded leading him away.

“Here?” Regulus asked pacing the area Remus had called him too. “Alright stand back.”

Regulus shifted into his animagi form, the big dog paced the area sniffing furiously. After a few minutes he laid down doing a sad whimper, shifting back to a man. He sat there holding his face, disappointment clear. Remus sighed sadly putting his hand on his shoulder, “We’ll keep looking.”

Remus turned ready to search the area when a silvery phoenix barreled into the clearing, Dumbledore’s voice booming out. “Regulus, Harry has been attacked during the tournament. A boy is dead and Moody an impostor. I fear Voldemort has returned.”

Remus watched his friends face twist up guiltily. He seemed so confused, looking around the forest then back towards Hogwarts. “I- I need to make sure Harry’s alright. I can’t let them both down.”

“Its fine, Regulus Harry needs you.” Remus said softly. “Let’s go back.”

*******

Sirius scrambled up the tree as fast as he could, the hissing behind him angry. He just needed to get high enough. He turned around seeing the giant arachnid starting up after him. He reached out taking his earing friend, it uncurled looking at him expectantly. “I hope you’re hungry.”

He felt kind of mean, but he chucked the swooping evil at the spider. It landed heavily before crawling to the head, it used it’s wolf like skull to crack open the spider’s head beginning a feast. Sirius watched the thing convulse before the spider dropped from the tree, limbs curling. He dropped down quickly after, watching his friend slurping away. He scrunched up his face.

“You’re a nasty little thing aren’t you?” He asked watching it slurp its brain soup. Sirius walked over knocking on the spider, he really wasn’t ready to stoop as low as eating a spider. The sound of hoofs made him spin, but it was only Firenze.

“I see you are doing quite well.” The centaur said, Sirius just shrugged. “I’ve been looking for you all night. I have a message from a man named Remus. He says he loves you and they are worried and looking for you.” Sirius gave him a skeptical look. It could be a trap after all. Firenze noticed his look, and softly added. “He says you aren’t in trouble, that they only want you home. I told him last we spoke you didn’t want to be found. Is this still true?”

Sirius didn’t answer he held out his arm letting his pet crawl up resuming his spot as an earring. Firenze flinched at this but said nothing waiting patiently for Sirius to speak. Sirius looked down, he wanted to believe them he really did. Remus had been nothing but kind and he would always trust Regulus. Harry, Hermione and Severus where also always so good to him. He rocked his bare feet on the ground unsure. A part of him wanted to go back but he was just so afraid, Markus wanted him dead and he had been a bad squib and attacked a wizard.

“You don’t need to answer now.” Firenze said, “However I am inclined to believe you’re werewolf friend.”

Sirius gave him a sad look shaking his head before walking away, he heard Firenze sighing as he left. He just couldn’t. He walked until night, only then did he sit down and glare into the star filled sky.

“Spike, knock it off.” Sirius muttered, as the swooping evil rigorously cleaned himself making tittering noises in his ear as it did so. He sighed bringing his knees in watching the firedrakes, fly around making sparks. He sniffled, curling deeper on himself. He was a bad squib, he had said no to a wizard. He deserved to be out here alone. It didn’t matter if he was sorry. It didn’t matter that he was lonely. It didn’t matter if he missed them. He watched the firedrakes fly up into the night sky, disappearing from the light of the full moon. He brought his knees in, he should find someplace safe for the night.

*******

Remus was sick to his stomach with worry in the shrieking shack with Regulus and Severus. Both men were unusually quiet. Probably as nervous as he was about Harry and Sirius. He looked over at Regulus the man was holding it together so well. He was able to look Harry in the face and be there for him. Severus was able to resume spying and look Voldemort in the face and act loyal. Remus, he just felt weak.

Severus, the amazing man, had still managed to brew him wolfsbane potion even with everything going on. He shifted about feeling the effects of the moon, his friend and lover changing forms to be ready. He yelled, and screamed and held himself. He writhed about on the floor, it still hurt but at least he’d have more control.

Moony opened his eyes breathing heavy. Fox, his fox, his mate. He rushed the fox, he wanted to mount that fox. Severus was agile, bouncing away. He whirled around, seeing his mate and his pack mate, heading down the tunnel. Yes. Run in woods. Run in woods good. Moony flung himself after them, moving quickly to be first. He was leader, he was first. He sniffed at his pack as he ran, they smelt a sour, he smelt sour too because of their missing cub. Sirius, he gave his head a shake, he meant Sirius.

The trio tore off into the forest, he really wanted to chase down Severus but he also wanted to throw Regulus around or chase down big game. He howled at the moon, making his pack mates join in. He felt like Regulus was purposely leading him somewhere, whenever he smelt something tasty, his pack mate would shove him along even nipping at him. He growled back tackling him, he was in charge he was the pack leader. A nip on the shoulder had him whirling after the fox again.

He pulled up short of actually hurting his mate- Severus, he reminded himself. He shoved his face into the smaller body nuzzling it. Barking had him turning back to the dog- Regulus, he cursed. He opened his mouth ready to growl when he smelt it. He stood up sniffing, he recognized that smell even faint. That was his pup! That was his Sirius!

He howled, before sprinting after it. He had to find him. He needed to find him. His friends where hot on his heels. He would stop and sent the air, breathing deeply before thundering off again. They did this for the better part of the night. He knew his pack was getting exhausted but he was close, Moony knew it. He scrapped the ground turning fast. It stopped. He whirled around sniffing, the scent stopped here. Then where was their pup?

He turned around sniffing the ground, Regulus copying him, while Severus inspected around them. He sniffed at the tree the scent stopped at. Sirius liked to climb trees a voice supplied. He looked up, a pale and very frightened face stared back holding the tree. Moony stood on his back legs howling he was here. He knew it. His pack mates joined him, Regulus jumping around barking and wagging his tail. Severus ran getting a good sprint he scaled the tree to a little under their pup. Moony’s eyes widened as his mate shifted to his human form sitting there holding the tree tightly.

He knew they were talking he really did but Moony couldn’t understand them. He saw Regulus pacing erratically beside him, waves of anxiety coming off him. Moony looked up again, seeing Sirius climbing up higher away from them. He snapped his jaw at this he wanted him down. He wanted him down now. He backed up and sprinted at the tree slamming his full body into it shaking it. He looked up seeing his pup staring at him alarmed holding tight a leg dangling, he tried again but Regulus got in the way growling. Moony growled back, he wanted their pup and he was in the way.

He lunged, throwing Regulus down, clawing and biting. He was in the way. He was in the way of their pup! Yipping caught his attention seeing his fox spring down the tree, he bite at his ankles till he backed up. He shook himself, right, right, he was probably scaring Sirius. He looked up whining at him, his ears going down. Sirius was saying something now, it sounded very garbled to him. He moved shifting his weight between two branches. Now! Moony charged slamming the tree.

He knew he made a mistake, when he saw Sirius land. His poor pup had yelled so loud, holding his backside wide eyed. Moony immediately started to approach, Sirius needed him. However he was thrown back by his pack mates. They stood in front of Sirius clearly threatening Moony to protect him. He had a moment of clarity, he’d hurt him knocking him down, he was a monster. He backed away whimpering. He just wanted to be there for him.

Sirius was talking again he tried to focus on it, “… .. Remus ….. .. afraid... … …….”

Afraid, he was afraid of him. Of course he was he was a monster. He’d hurt him, he turned ready to run away, but Severus got in his face blocking him. He glanced back sadly at the pup, he was talking again holding a hand out to him. “Remus… …… ….. ….. I missed you.”

He understood that. He turned around moving quickly, Regulus moved to block him. They clashed, but he wasn’t interested in a fight. He scrambled away from him getting in Sirius’s scared face, he wasn’t sure what to do so he flopped in his lap whimpering. He willed them to understand, understand that he wouldn’t hurt their pup, he loved him. A hand touching his scruff made him look up. He saw his pup- Sirius’s face dissolving into tears, he was worried he looked around for a threat but found none. He felt a weight, looking down he saw Severus getting comfy on him while Regulus pushed into his and Sirius’s side lapping at his brothers face till he smiled. Moony sighed, this felt right, his pack was whole.

*******

When Remus woke he was sore, flashes of the night flooded his mind. He rolled over quickly, he had to know if it was real. He felt bad throwing Severus’s fox form but he had to know. Sirius was there, he was there sleeping face in Regulus’s fur.

“Moony found him…” He whisper.

“No, you did.” Severus said human and stretching.

Remus felt terrible for waking the teen but he couldn’t help it. He pulled him into his arms sobbing. He was alive, he was ok. He felt the wave of Sirius’s body stiffening before relaxing and returning the tight hug. “Oh Merlin, Sirius never do that again! We were so worried!”

“I’m sorry…” Sirius whispered. “Are- are you going to take me back? Are you going to send me to Azkaban?”

“You aren’t going to Azkaban!” Regulus said, adding to the hug. “Siri, you were never in trouble. We’re so sorry that you didn’t think you could talk to us.”

“You aren’t mad at me?” Sirius asked shifting to hold Regulus more.

“Sirius, none of this is your fault.” Severus said flatly, “That man hurt you, period. When we get back we’ll press charges against him.”

“No- no.” Sirius said body tensing. “He didn’t do anything wrong. I asked for it.”

“No, Sirius. That’s not a thing. He was wrong. He never should have touched you.” Regulus said softly standing them up. “It will be alright, we’ll bring him to justice- what’s on your ear?”

“Oh, this is Spike.” Sirius said, showing them all the baby swooping evil. “He’s got a busted wing. Firenze said he was useless because he may never fly but I’ll never do magic and I’m not useless. I just think he needs some extra love. Like me.”

Remus shared a look with the other men knowing they couldn’t get rid of it now. So he had to watch Sirius put the _human brain eating_ creature back on his earlobe like an earring without a care. He smiled fondly at him, Sirius would be the death of him if he wasn't careful.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter kept getting longer and longer. So I broke it in half. This is Sirius the in the woods half. Next half shall be the fallout of everything.   
> Also he now has a pet. :)   
> Also we got our first ever Moony POV fun.


	18. Chapter 18

Hermione was the first one to lay into him giving him a soft scolding about running away before crying into his arms about how worried she was. Remus was the second one to give him a talking to with Regulus and Severus as back up. Harry had just been happy he was back and made him promise he would never do it again before hugging him relieved. It was strange even though they were upset at him for running away, he didn’t really feel threatened, just sad that he disappointed them.

Sirius didn’t want to press charges against Markus, he really, really didn’t. That would mean he had to talk about it. However everyone else thought it was a good idea. Harry had even held his hand as he mumbled and cried through his story to the auror. He wanted Moody but he was in St. Mungo’s the new auror was a nice man, Shaklebolt. He had listened and nodded telling him he was brave for talking about this. He didn’t feel brave.

“Alright,” Shaklebolt said standing “If that’s everything, I’m going to get down to the Ministry and start my report. I’ll be in touch.”

Sirius glared down as Harry squeezed his hand. Regulus in dog form was practically on him as he ran his free hand through his fur. He glanced up at his guardians as they started to see Shaklebolt out. He looked at Harry seeing the patient and kind smile, Sirius bit his lip.

“W-wait.” Sirius said softly afraid to meet their gaze as they stopped. “There’s more. There’s a lot more…”

He felt physically sick telling them about Barrick, about the Malfoys. It was awful. Regulus had started breathing heavy but kept his animagi body solidly on him letting Sirius hide his face and cry into him when he couldn’t meet their gaze any longer. Harry kept rubbing his hand even as he squeezed Harry’s in a death grip, he was so embarrassed and so ashamed. He felt Remus stiffly rubbing circles on his back as he muttered his story through tears.

Shaklebolt sighed deeply when he was done, Sirius couldn’t bring himself to look up. “I’m really sorry however the statute of limitations has run out.”

“What are you talking about?” Harry snapped as Remus and Severus sighed disappointed.

“I’m really sorry.” Shaklebolt said, Sirius looked up so confused. “However there are some old laws in place here. Squibs aren’t the same as us, they only have a statute of limitation of one year for abuse and three for sexual crimes. I’m terribly sorry but it’s been four years.”

Sirius could almost laugh, of course he wasn’t good enough. Of course the laws were stacked against him. He buried his face in Snuffles fur wanting to disappear in it. He’d finally felt he could tell someone and they’d care, they’d help him and yet it would do nothing.

“This is outrageous!” Harry yelled, “How could the Ministry be so broken!”

Remus sighed rubbing Sirius back, “It’s the same for werewolves. We’re seen as lesser, because we aren’t the same as wizards. Sirius I’m so sorry.”

“On a different note.” Shaklebolt said awkwardly, “I’m going to put up your charges against Markus. We’ll see him brought to justice.”

“Good.” Harry growled. Sirius silently thought ‘yeah right’.

********

Remus felt like a bad person for being smug after learning that Sirius’s shovel strike had done permanent damage but he couldn’t help it. When Shaklebolt had dropped by to report that Markus had lost all sense of feeling in his legs, paralyzed from the waist down permanently, Remus had smirked. However Severus had a fair point that telling Sirius this probably wouldn’t go well. Sirius was in enough misery with going to the wizard court and telling his story about Markus over and over, plus they couldn’t bring their ‘dog’.

Then came a new horrible thing, the trio sat Sirius down and for lack of a better word gave him a very serious talk. It was not pleasant it was awkward and tense. They explained a lot to him about sex and consent, they tried to reiterate constantly that Sirius could always say no.

“That doesn’t work.” Sirius said bluntly. “They do it anyway.”

Remus felt his heart break at the horrible realization of what his pup had been through. He glanced at him unsure what to say as Regulus looked ready to murder someone. Severus cleared his throat, “Sirius someone that truly cares about you will stop the second you say it. They won’t force you. They will love and respect you enough to listen.”

Sirius was startled at this, Remus could see the confusion and disbelief on his face. “But squibs can’t say no to wizards. We can’t argue with them either.”

“Sirius,” Remus said. “You can say no and argue with wizards. We won’t get mad. We’d like to hear your voice, we will always listen.”

It was emotionally exhausting and Sirius asked some questions that he didn’t feel any of them where ready for. It broke his heart hearing him ask some things, and the way he said it like it should be normal. He could see the bitter hatred on Regulus’s face and the silent promise of pain and death on Severus’s. In the end they had hugged him, telling him they did not judge him for the things that had happened to him and again reiterated that it wasn’t his fault.

“We love you Siri,” Regulus said holding him tight. “It’s not your fault. You didn’t deserve this.”

“That’s what Harry said.” Sirius said holding him back.

“Then Harry is a good friend. Keep him close.” Regulus said placing a kiss on his head.

“Sirius, if you have any more questions please ask us. We love you.” Severus said smoothing back his hair.

“I- I really don’t want to talk about it anymore.” Sirius said pulling away his eyes drifting to the ground. “I need to lie down this is- a lot… I’m going to go to bed early.”

“Alright love. Sleep tight.” Remus said.

“Reggie?” Sirius asked looking at him expectantly.

“Sorry Sirius, I have a meeting with Dumbledore. Go to bed. I’ll be there in the morning.” Regulus said Sirius nodded climbing the stairs.

Once the door shut Remus turned to him. “You don’t have a meeting.”

“Yes I do. Just not with Dumbledore.” Regulus said eyes dark.

“Oh yes. I’m joining your meeting.” Severus said quickly summoning his robes.

Remus’s eyes widened. “Now hold on I want revenge as much as you both. But we can’t do anything crazy.”

“Why I’m already wanted.” Regulus said, “It will give them a real reason to hunt me down.”

“Think of Sirius!” Remus said, “You both can’t get arrested. He’ll be heartbroken losing you. Both of you. And legally speaking as a werewolf I can’t keep Sirius alone, they could try to take him away from me.”

“Fine.” Regulus said slamming his hand to the table. “Nothing too crazy.”

“Thank you.” Remus said in relief.

“Come on Severus take me for a walk.” Regulus said grabbing the spare leash and collar they kept for Snuffles.

“Gladly.” Severus said giving Remus a quick kiss before they departed. “Watch Sirius, we’ll be back later.”

“Don’t kill him, don’t become murders! And for Merlin’s sake don’t get caught!” Remus yelled out the door as they disappeared in a crack. He rubbed his eyebrows praying to Merlin that they behaved.

The next morning both men seemed off, Remus dared not ask. Sirius had come in eaten and disappeared to write Harry a letter not noticing anything. Remus watched them both but neither said anything which almost made it scarier. It wasn’t until he got the Daily Prophet that Remus got to make a little ‘ahh’ noise of realization.

Apparently ‘someone’ had broken into Mr. Barrick’s shop, done some serious damage and put him in St. Mungo’s. A robbery gone wrong, they called it. Plus while the aurors where investigating they came across several illegal potions ingredients and- Remus blanched, child pornography of a young boy. John Barrick was now detained for questioning and pending arrest. He looked up at the two men showing them the article.

“You’re work?” He asked pointing, Severus glared at the article with thinly veiled disgust.

“It wasn’t enough.” Regulus said looking away. “I wanted him dead so badly. So badly Remus… But Severus made a point… Dying would be too easy. I want him to _suffer_. I want him to be locked away in Azkaban, deprived of the world going mad in a shell of his own torture. I want a dementor to kiss him and for him to know his soul is about to be taken from him. It’s said it’s unbearable to witness, I’d watch in a heartbeat.”

********

Unfortunately the trial against Markus didn’t go the way they expected, it went the way Sirius had expected. He was called a liar. He was called a terrible squib that had ruined a young wizard’s career. Markus was framed as the good boy, it was a misunderstanding. Sirius didn’t say no in the memories. Sirius was a crazy squib who attacked a wizard, had tried to ruin his future with lies and slander and had caused permanently paralyzed him. Suffice to say his case against Markus was actually thrown out and they would not appeal it.

He refused to come out of his room all summer. Him and Harry’s faces where plastered on the Daily Prophet, the boys who lied. He absolutely hated it. He was called downstairs to see his guardians, Regulus and Dumbledore sitting together. Regulus gestured for him to sit with him.

“We need to talk.” Remus said, “The Dark Lord is back, Severus and I are expected to act as a loyal Death Eaters.”

Sirius looked at them both teeth grinding as Severus started talking, “Sirius, you mentioned that the Dark Lord was influencing- Barrick to do potions experiments on you and using your blood and skin.” Sirius’s breathe hitched as he nodded, Regulus rubbed his back as Severus continued, “We don’t want you here incase-”

“You don’t want me!?” Sirius cried as a knee jerk reaction, he felt a pit in his stomach as they tried back tracking. “Is it because of what happened to me? I thought you said it wasn’t my fault what he did!”

“No, of course it wasn’t your fault. Never think that again. We do want you.” Remus said quickly reassuring him making him calm down. 

Dumbledore cleared his throat. “However, after what you said. We decided you may not be safe in this house at least not now, knowing Voldemort is back and that he encouraged Barrick to experiment on you.” Sirius shuddered.

“We don’t want the Dark Lord to try to take you away from us. Grimmauld Place is- unfortunately safer. So for the next week you and me will stay there.” Regulus said as Sirius jolted shocked. “Will you be alright with that? It’s for your safety.”

Sirius opened and closed his mouth before looking at his guardians he needed reassurance. “You still want me? You’re not leaving me?”

“Of course we still want you!” Remus practically yelled as him and Severus came up to him each taking a hand.

Severus continued, “We don’t want to leave you, we just have to as a safety precaution.”

“Siri, you’ll be with me, Harry and your friends.” Regulus said hand rubbing his back. “And in a week you’ll be back at Hogwarts.”

“Fine- I’ll go.” Sirius said before muttering darkly. “Never thought Grimmauld Place would be considered ‘safe’.”

“Splendid!” Dumbledore said happily collapsing his hands together. “Now gentlemen we must discuss preparations for if Tom Riddle asks for Sirius.”

Sirius’s eyes widened at this, Regulus grabbed him. “Not in front of Sirius he doesn’t need to be more stressed. Go upstairs, and pack. Your friends and Harry will be here tonight and after the meeting we leave for Grimmauld Place.”

Sirius cursed rushing out of the room. He didn’t want to leave so soon, he had barely digested what he had been told. He didn’t want to be around so many people either. He packed quickly but was too fidgety to relax. He hated this. He felt Spike drop to his shoulder roaming his back as he paced his room. Finally he gave up and scurried past the men to the kitchen, he baked a storm in there, double chocolate cookies and carrot cake from scratch with homemade cream cheese frosting.

His guardians, Regulus and Dumbledore had wandered in after a while watching him and making light conversation. Dumbledore was helping himself to Sirius’s hard work when the floo flared to life. A woman with color changing hair walked she looked around before spotting Remus, she twirled her hair taking a cookie as she looked at him. Sirius did not like the way she looked at Remus, she looked at him like she was hungry. He didn’t like her but she wasn’t aggressively staring at him like Lockhart did Severus.

“Nymphadora.” Regulus said.

She whirled on him, “Don’t call me that. Tonks is better. Who’s the kid?”

Regulus spoke. “He’s not a kid, he’s my brother Sirius. Sirius this is our cousin’s daughter.”

“Oh… You’re the stunted squib mum talked about.” She smiled at him but Sirius grit his teeth as she took a bite of the cookie continuing. “Glad to see you’re doing well after what happened. That boy Markus should be rotting in jail, you poor thing.”

Sirius blinked at her wide eyed as Regulus’s face contorted. He grabbed Spike from the top of the fridge and rushed from the room. Merlin damn it, he could not escape this. He took the stairs two at a time and slammed the door. He threw himself on his bed glaring at the wall as Spike climbed out of his hands scaling the bed. He was sure in her head that sounded nice, or maybe comforting but he was miserable. Remus came and comforted him before retreating downstairs. Sirius did not want to move even as their home filled with people, the whole Weasley family, Hermione and people who his guardians, all three of them, called Order members.

“Sirius.” Hermione’s voice called from the other side of the door. “May I come in?”

“It’s open.” He said mournfully watching Spike jumping around struggling to fly. She opened the door only to have the swooping evil, dive at her. She threw her hands up as Sirius yelled. “Spike! Leave her brain alone, you could never eat that much.”

It gave a little hiss at her before jumping to his outstretched arm returning to his earlobe. Hermione shuddered, “I see he’s doing better.”

“Yeah, Hagrid has really done wonders for him.” Sirius said. She sat down and he threw himself on her legs earning an oof. “Says he thinks he’ll be flying if we keep it up. He’s really harmless but he has a good bite.”

“That’s wonderful.” He felt her hands in his hair gently running her fingers threw it, “Sirius, you know you’re my best friend, like a brother really. And I want you to know, that no matter what I’m here for you. I believe you. I’m horrified by how the ministry treated you, we should do something about it. If you need anything I’m here.”

“Thanks Hermione, you’re my best friend too. But… I don’t want to talk about it...” Sirius said softly.

She hummed gently playing with his hair as Ginny and Ron entered. “Hermione are you in- What’s going on in here?”

“Nothing Ronald.” Hermione said, as Sirius turned looking at them.

“Doesn’t look like nothing.” Ron said, but Hermione ignored him, the twins laughed popping into the room.

“Don’t be jealous.” Fred said, as George added, “It’s not a good look.”

“Ignore them.” Hermione said. “Sirius did anyone tell you about Harry? He’s been expelled. Dumbledore’s got him a trial. They’re bringing him here tonight.”

Sirius sat up immediately, “Are you joking? That’s ridiculous.”

“Isn’t it though.” Ginny said leaning on the door frame.

“You know what I thinks ridiculous?” Ron said shuddering, “Being in Professor Snape’s house, it’s surprisingly normal.”

Sirius scrunched up his face. “What did you expect? And Severus is awesome. Though I admit he’s stricter now. He was more fun when he was younger. Regulus told me he once got detention for a week for dying Minerva’s hair green trying to hit James.”

“What?” The twins asked in unison siding up to him but thankfully not touching him. Fred continuing, “Tell us more, dear friend.”

Sirius tapped his chin, “Let’s see, him, my brother and James once enchanted the owl podium to fly around the great hall during the welcoming feast. They also made the library books scream and run when you open them. Although, I don’t think he’d approve of me telling you this. Just ask him, or Remus and Regulus they’d tell you”

“Harry’s here!” Molly yelled up the stairs.

The Weasley’s all disappeared, two running, two apparating, Hermione rolled her eyes standing. She reached back offering her hand which he took gratefully. He had been having trouble facing people since what Markus did was revealed publicly, people kept either pitying the poor squib or worse calling him a liar.

“Regulus.” Harry said as they entered the room, Regulus held Harry tightly looking down at him with a gentle smile. “Regulus, I missed you so much.”

“I missed you too Harry.” Regulus said, “You’re friends are here.”

Harry pulled back greeting them from under Regulus’s arm. He locked eyes with Sirius and pulled away, Harry smiled walking towards him when Ginny got in the way hugging him. “Oh Harry I missed you so much.”

“I missed you too Ginny.” He said awkwardly.

Sirius looked down letting Hermione pull him into a chair by her, Fred and George on his other side. Hermione leaned in, “Don’t worry about it. I’m sure he’ll talk to you later.”

He hummed looking at Fred and George as they spoke to Severus. “So Professor, know any spells to make an owl podium fly?”

“Haven’t the foggiest.” Severus said, giving Sirius the side eye as Regulus laughed.

“I remember that.” Regulus said sitting with Harry, “Oh Merlin James was so proud of that one.”

“My dad made the owl podium fly around?” Harry said.

Arthur looked up pointing at the twins. “You two better not do that.”

“Oh yeah we got into lots of mischief.” Regulus said laughing.

“Enough of this!” Moody snapped making Sirius jump. “I wanted to be here for the Order Meeting and the meeting only. Not talk of your glory days at Hogwarts. Now let’s do this meeting.”

“Dinner first then the kids go upstairs.” Molly chided levitating the food to serve it.

Once done the children were rounded up and sent upstairs. The twins argued with their mother, while Harry argued with Regulus that they should be able to stay but the three were turned away. Sirius slipped under Molly’s arm getting to Regulus he sat down.

“Pumpkin aren’t you going upstairs?” Tonks asked while making googly eyes at Remus.

“Actually I’m older then you.” Sirius said feeling a little confident. “Stunted squib remember? I’m actually- Regulus how old are you?”

“You’re fifteen going on thirty-two. He’s right, he’s not a baby.” Regulus said putting a hand on his head. “However, we agreed that you were to grow up normally with Harry so. Nice try, off you go.”

Sirius felt himself stiffen he wanted to argue, he really did. But he wasn’t supposed to argue with wizards but this was Regulus. “I- I want to stay…”

Regulus looked at him fondly, pulling out a chocolate frog giving it to him. “I’m glad you’re arguing with me I really am. But how about you let us handle this. Go hang out with your friends.”

His shoulders sank but he nodded all the same. He was so sick of being pushed aside. He liked it better in the damn forest. He went upstairs entering his room to see his friends spread around it. Ron was talking, “I can’t believe I agreed to spend the night here. I thought I was going to be at Regulus’s house not Snape’s.”

“Actually,” Hermione said. “Mrs. Weasley said after the meeting we were all going to 12 Grimmauld place.”

Sirius stiffened up at the reminder. He must have been shaking because Harry leaned into him whispering that it was alright. The night went on, they tried to spy on the Order but had no luck. Then it switched to Ron wanting to play wizards chess and destroying everyone in the room that dared play.

“Come on anyone want to go?” Ron asked smugly.

“I will.” Sirius said sliding to the floor, Spike uncurled at his movement running along his shoulders before returning to his spot. “Harry sit with me. The pieces don’t listen to me.”

Harry smiled sitting next to him their knees bumping as he commanding the pieces for him. It was a close game but Ron still won in the end. He made little whooping noises until Regulus showed up to get them. One by one they apparated away, till it was just him and Harry left.

“Reggie, do I have to go?” Sirius asked eyes down.

“Hey I don’t want to go either, believe me.” Regulus said, “I’m sorry, I know it’s rather sudden but it’s only for a week. I thought you were ok with this?”

He agreed, but he didn’t like it. Regulus apparated them to the door, he told Harry the location while Sirius walked up breathing heavily. Regulus wrapped his arms around both of them leading them in. Sirius’s eyes darted literally everywhere terrified that his parents would come crashing out at him.

“Filthy mudbloods and blood traitors, in the mistress’s house!” Kreacher yelled making Sirius cling to Regulus like a child heart going wild. Kreacher bounced up to them pointing heavily at them. “Disgraced squib and disowned blood traitor.”

Regulus grabbed Kreacher, dragging him away from them. “None of that! You will not talk that way. Sirius and I are the masters of this house. Now you will go and you will prepare guest rooms for our company.”

“Yes master Regulus…” Kreacher said begrudgingly disappearing.

“Ok,” Regulus said getting all everyone’s attention, “I’m going to take my old room. But the guest rooms are being set up for everyone else, boys in one room girls the other. Molly and Arthur you obviously will have your own room.”

“What’s under here?” Fred asked pulling back large red velvet curtains curiously.

“No- no!” Regulus yelled but it was too late Wallburga Black’s portrait blinked awake. Sirius’s blood went cold his breathing stopped as she turned snarling at them.

“What’s this scum in my house!? Mudbloods! Filth!” Her eyes swiveled landing on them, “Half breeds!”

“Oh shut up!” Regulus yelled cutting off her rant trying to close the curtains. She huffed at him, but Sirius was having trouble standing. He must have started to fall because Harry was grabbing him yelling his name as he stared at the floor. Ron ran grabbing his other side each trying to hoist him up as the shock of seeing his mother became too much for him.

“Sirius! Sirius what’s wrong?” Harry asked. This was a mistake as now Wallburga had zeroed in on him.

“You unstunted him? All that hard work! Does Barrick even _want_ him anymore!?” She yelled, “Dirty little thing!”

He wasn’t sure what she said or even what happened after that. He was almost sure he blacked out, since he was in the hallway and the next minute he was on the couch. Harry and Hermione were squished into his sides holding him up, while Spike clung to his shirt hissing protectively. There was a distinct smell of smoke in the air and Regulus was pacing muttering obscenities.

That night Sirius could not sleep. He was sharing a room with Harry, Ron and the twins but he was so stressed it was painful. He cursed he thought he could handle this. He sat up, grabbing Spike’s small cage, he walked to the door mentally sighing in relief when it opened. He tip toed down the hallway face crumpling. He was too old for this, he opened the door to Regulus’s room. He placed Spike down, approaching his brother’s bed. Before he even reached down Regulus threw the cover’s back letting him in.

“Took you long enough.” Regulus muttered into his hair as Sirius cuddled into him trying not to cry from the stress and anxiety of being here. He felt his brother place a kiss on his head, “I’m so sorry Sirius, I wish we didn’t have to be here either.”

********

Remus’s leg shook impatiently, he was so scared for his husband. Severus had been gone for hours at the Death Eater meeting. He nibbled his nails, his stomach feeling sick. He was debating pacing, he was glad they had sent Sirius away he wouldn’t have wanted him to see him in such a state of worry. Though he felt horrible that they could only send him to Grimmauld Place but it was for the best least the Dark Lord tried to take Sirius away from them he would be hidden. He stood up shakily making himself tea, he sipped it slowly staring wide eyed at nothing.

At long last he heard apparition and the door opening. He put his cup down and ran into the room. Severus looked awful, he ran up supporting him under the arm bringing him to the couch. He laid him down, they shared a look as his lover breathed heavily lifting one hand in a week point. Remus nodded in understanding, he moved swiftly getting a potion to calm his nerves and one for pain. He brought them to his lips and Severus drank greedily.

Remus smiled sadly at him, he leaned forward kissing him tasting a bit of the calming drought. He held his hand and waited for him to be ready to speak. Severus pushed himself up with his elbows after a few minutes sighing.

“He was curious why we have Sirius and why I would un-stunt him.” He said, Remus looked at him waiting to hear more. “I told him it was the best way we could think to keep Dumbledore’s trust. He… He wasn’t pleased but- he believed me.”

Remus nodded, Severus started shaking as he continued. “He wants me to continue experimenting on him. Like John Barrick had been.”

“No.” Remus said looking horrified.

“I told him Dumbledore would notice. So he agreed for now that I shouldn’t.” Severus said sitting up. “But Remus, you need to understand. If something ever happens to Dumbledore, we need to send Sirius away from us. Away from me. He needs to go with Regulus, with the Weasley or you’ll need to leave me to save him.”

Remus breathed deeply, “I won’t leave you. That will be our last resort. If the time is ever to come we will figure something out together.”

“Remus…” Severus said lip trembling, “Remus we need to do whatever we can to keep that monster away from him. If you need to leave me to keep him away from the Death Eaters and the Dark Lord then that’s what we’ll do.”

Remus’s face fell, “There has to be another way…”

********

Molly had insisted they clean the house from top to bottom really making Sirius feel like he had gone back to being ‘five’. Regulus had insisted they not but Molly said the house was too horrifying to live in. At least he wasn’t alone in his cleaning but the constant waking up and cleaning had him confused after a while. Molly called them in for lunch one day and he just sat on the floor. He got strange looks and was going to stand but Harry and Hermione had joined him acting like nothing was wrong. He leaned into Harry the slightest bit but he was scared he was regressing.

He desperately wanted to go with Harry to the trial but he was told it was better he stayed behind. He pouted he was always left behind. He followed Molly as she did more cleaning, she wanted him to show her around a little since Regulus had discovered their parents booze supply and had seemingly been going to town on it. The next day she assigned them all different rooms. Harry stood firm that he go with Sirius, demanding it really. So they were together now with him telling Sirius about the trial.

“It went well I guess. I can return back to Hogwarts, Dumbledore was really helpful.” He said opening one of the many doors while Sirius was distracted by a glaring picture of his parents, he ushered him in. He looked around horrified at the room they walked into he immediately turned running for the door but it had already shut and locked. “Sirius what’s the matter?”

This was too much, he hated it here. He shook his head violently banging on the door. “Let me out! Don’t lock me away! Let me out!”

“Sirius,” Harry said running over trying to unlock it. “It’s warded.”

“Please let me out!” Sirius cried sinking to the floor facing the room as the cabinet opened. Regulus tumbled out, covered in cuts and bruises, his neck slit and his eyes devoid of life. Sirius was openly crying now, Spike hissed arching his back at the possible threat.

“Please… I’ll be a good squib… Just let me out…” He cried as he grabbed Harry’s shirt desperately giving it a tug, he felt so small.

Harry looked down at him before startling at the lifeless figure behind them. Harry’s eyes widen, he stepped forward wand out. Forcing Regulus into changing form, quickly he banished the boggart, banished it for good.

He crouched down scooping him into a big hug as he cried. Harry had gotten Sirius basically into his lap holding him tight. Sirius turned his face inwards towards Harry’s neck as he held him back in a death grip.

“I can’t! I can’t take it here anymore!” Sirius cried just feeling broken being in this house. It was just a house, no one was hurting him, or forcing him to do things but all the memories and fear was just too much. He felt so embarrassed as he dug his fingers into Harry needing to be grounded, “Harry please… I thought I could handle it. I was wrong…”

“One more day Sirius. Then we’ll go back to Hogwarts.” Harry said softly burying his face in Sirius’s soft black hair. “I’m here. You’ll be alright. Breathe with me. I’m here.”

The door was ripped open as the real Regulus stormed in alarmed. Sirius too focused on his breathing was oblivious to his brother’s presence as Harry rubbed his back. Harry shared a look with Regulus, mouthing ‘boggart’ and ‘later’.

“I- I think I’m ok.” Sirius said leaning back still breathing methodically. “Stupid house- stupid anxiety... Thanks Harry.”

“Anytime.” Harry said smiling at him reassuringly pulling him back in to hold him tighter. Sirius swore he felt Harry’s lips ghost his cheek before he turned whispering into his ear. “I’ll always be here for you Sirius.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So Remus is kinda equal to Narcissa. Like "loyal" Death Eater but not marked.  
> Sirius paralyzed Markus when he hit him with the shovel.  
> And 2/3 of Dad Squad got a 'little' vengeance on Barrick.


	19. Chapter 19

Sirius was so happy to be back at Hogwarts. Remus was still doing grounds keeping, it made it easier for him to leave on spying missions in werewolf colonies. Severus still did his thing, being the scary teacher he was. Sirius still went to three classes with his friends but also helped Remus however he was more interested in keeping his head down and not being seen. Both his guardians had warned him about the new teacher a Madam Umbridge, they wanted him to stay far away from her. Unfortunately that didn’t last long.

“Hem-Hem.” Sounded behind him, he turned around from his spot at the Gryffindor table to see a toad like woman in all pink. “And why aren’t you in uniform?”

“I’m not a student.” He said, Harry and Ron stopped talking to glare at her.

She breathed deeply threw her nose before asking. “Then why are you at the students table?”

“Err… My guardians let me sit here.” He said not entirely sure how to answer.

“Squibs aren’t allowed at these tables.” She said, but Sirius heard ‘squibs aren’t allowed at tables’. He stumbled over himself trying to stand as he fought his rapidly beating heart. She smiled at the distress forming on his face when his hand was grabbed by Harry.

“Sit down.” Harry said sternly, pulling him down next to him. “Just tell her _no_. That you can sit here.”

Sirius felt sick at the idea of saying no, he wanted to though. He swallowed hard and started to sound out the word. She spoke over him, “Mr. Potter, I think it’s highly inappropriate that a squib is sitting at a school children’s table. As High Inquisitor I hold the rights of the ministry. As enacted by the educational decree number 23. Therefore-”

“Therefore what?” Severus said his voice slicing through her speech like a knife, Sirius sighed in relief.

Umbridge sized him up taking short huffy breaths. “Therefore he shouldn’t be sitting with the children.”

“My mistake. Come on Sirius. Back to the head table.” Severus said politely.

“What?” She gasped horrified. “He can’t sit there.”

Severus looked at her from the side of his eye, “Why not?”

“Because that’s for the staff, not children.” She said glaring at him.

“So you call him a child but don’t want him to sit with children and you don’t want him at the head table because he’s not a staff.” He said drumming his fingers on his crossed arms. “Do you hear yourself and how utterly ridiculous you sound?” She gaped at him as he continued, “Go sit down.”

“This isn’t over.” She said giving him a nasty look before spinning on her heel. Severus following after her acting as a block to keep her moving forward.

“I hate her.” Harry growled as Hermione nodded. He pulled out a chocolate frog handing it to Sirius, Hermione made a noise at this. Harry shrugged as Sirius unwrapped it. “He tried to say no and she ignored him, she’s just a prat.”

“I never thought I’d say this, but thank Merlin for Snape.” Ron grumbled.

“Severus went easy on her.” Sirius said nudging closer to Harry, “Remus would have torn her a new one.”

“Are you trying to say that Snape, the bat of the dungeons Snape, is nicer then Lupin?” Ron asked bewildered.

Sirius nodded, as Harry smiled gently at him, he smiled back their knees bumping. “Hey Harry, its full moon in a couple of days I was wondering if-”

“Hi Harry,” Ginny said, sitting down on Harry’s other side flipping her long red hair. “Quidditch tryouts are later today, are you coming?”

Just like that Sirius lost Harry’s attention, his shoulders slumped. Harry had once said that he liked him, and that he’d wait for him but Sirius guessed not. Why would he wait for him when he had someone as pretty as her looking at him? After all he was just a messed up squib.

********

Sirius was sick of being useless. He was sick of being seen as weak. He was also so sick of being the victim again and again. He couldn’t figure it out, when he was in the forbidden forest he had been ok. He fended for himself, he fought off a giant arachnid and survived out there for over a week. Remus and Hagrid both admitted that even a wizard would struggle with more than two nights. He survived six.

So here he was the first Hogsmeade weekend with Hermione, buying a boat load of potions. The witch at the counter gave him a curious look as he placed the potions on the table. She clicked her tongue at him. “Present your wand.”

“Hermione?” He said looking at her patiently.

She stared back at him before showing the witch her wand. The woman pursed her lips before nodding, “How will you be paying?”

“You can get the money from the Black family vaults.” He said simply, the woman gave him a sharp look.

“Alright.” She said crossing his arms, she took Sirius’s information. Hermione had to leave holding the bag, because she would not give it to a squib, stating it was for ‘legal reason’.

“Alright, Sirius.” Hermione said holding out the bag of potions to him. “What are these? And why did I have to carry it out for legal reasons?”

“Legally speaking she couldn’t sell potions such as these to a squib.” He said dumping the potions into the expanding bag she had made for him. “They’re different types of battle potions and healing potions.”

“What?” Hermione said rounding on him. “Sirius, look at yourself. You have a swooping evil hanging from your ear like jewelry and now a small bag of battle potions.”

“And I'm still less dangerous then you.” He said glaring down, “Hermione you have all kinds of power. If I’m going to live here, I need to even the playing field. I don’t want to be helpless anymore. I wasn’t helpless in the forest but should I feel that way all the time.”

“You were more comfortable in the forbidden forest, then walking around a town?” She asked her face dropping.

“Everything was magical but- They couldn’t do what witches and wizards do.” He said shaking his head.

“Alright, Sirius.” She said softly nodding taking his hand giving him a quick supportive squeeze. He smiled at her as they walked to meet Harry and the others at Hogs Head for recruitment of Dumbledore’s army. He sat next to Hermione, Harry sat next to him only for Ginny to forcibly sit between them with Cho on Harry’s other side. He listened to their whole plan of Dumbledore’s Army, and learning spells away from Umbridge. It reminded him of James.

“I can’t wait. This will be hysterical.” Sirius said making the twins laugh.

“Oh _your_ coming?” Ginny asked turning to look at him her brow raised. Sirius gave her a dumbfounded stare as Hermione tensed next to him.

“Why wouldn’t he come?” Harry asked leaning to look at them, Ginny shrugged playing with her butterbeer. Harry turned to the group continuing, “So we are all under agreement?”

There were nods all around and the plan went into action.

********

Sirius hummed happily looking up from his drawing of Spike to watch Harry do his first meeting, he was really nervous but Sirius would have been too. Harry had made a really cool teaching room complete with dummies to practice on, mirrors and a lovely fire place. But Sirius’s favorite spot was what Harry had the room seem to make just for him. A cozy extra-large chair just like the one he always saw Regulus lounging on at home, complete with pillows and even a fuzzy blanket. He was in paradise sitting there watching them all practice as Spike would climbed around his chair.

It wasn’t till they were done did he finally get up. He put his hands behind his back approaching Harry slowly, Spike had climbed off the chair and was doing lazy swoops around the high parts of the ceiling. Harry was congratulating people on their first class as Ron and Hermione helped them escape with the Marauders map.

“Hey Harry,” Sirius said shyly, the other teen turned to him grinning. “Umm… tonight’s the full moon. I don’t really want to be alone so I was wondering if I could sleep in your dorm.”

“Of course Sirius.” Harry said eyes lighting up a little out of breath from class. “Wait what did you do last month?”

“Madam Pomfrey’s.” He whispered looking down embarrassed. Sleeping in his own bed, he could do mostly, some nights he needed to pace or talk to someone. So sleeping completely alone without knowing someone else was there was almost impossible.

Harry nodded in understanding, “Do you need to get your stuff?” Sirius shook his head, he had it in his expanding bag’s front pocket. With a whistle, Spike flew down reattaching himself easily. Harry raised a brow, “I have to admit that’s pretty wicked.” Sirius smiled.

Once back in the dormitory, Harry transfigured a bed in-between his and Ron’s for him. It wasn’t as fancy as theirs but it was a bed. He watched Harry’s dorm mates give Spike horrified looks as he climbed up sitting on Sirius’s head.

“Blimmy, you must be mental to have that thing on your head.” Seamus said scowling.

“Spike’s harmless.” Sirius said before tapping his chin in thought, “Or I guess he’s trained. Right?”

He reached up stroking the swooping evil as it made a purring noise. He pulled him down kissing his head before putting him in his cage for the night. They all talked lightly for a bit before slowly falling asleep drawing their curtains. Harry drew his mostly shut leaving only half the curtain on Sirius’s side open so they could see each other. Harry yawned and wished him goodnight removing his glasses.

Sirius gasped waking up, he held his upper arms looking around the room. Momentarily he panicked not recognizing where he was till he saw Harry sleeping in the bed next to him. He sighed in relief, holding his head. It was just a dream. It wasn’t real. He laid back down, but he was shaking. He cursed flipping over, he could still feel the ghost of those hands holding him down. This would be a bad night, normally he would end up talking with his guardians or in bed with Regulus since his night terrors came back but that wasn’t an option. He breathed heavily he felt so lonely.

He looked at Harry, he bit his lip. James let him sleep with him and Harry once let him sleep with him. He climbed out of bed quietly, tip toeing to Harry’s. He debating waking him up to ask but then he could accidentally wake the others plus Harry said he was there for him when he needed it. He hesitated, gingerly he pulled back the covers and slunk into bed with him. He reached up drawing the curtain not wanting to get caught. He cuddled down and immediately felt relief at the touch of someone he trusted. He closed his eyes and wiggled a little closer to Harry. A tired arm grabbed him making him gasp but Harry only snuggled into him sleeping. He smiled going back to sleep.

Sirius woke up feeling much more rested and something warm holding him from behind. His brain then caught up to climbing in Harry’s bed with him. He stiffened up feeling Harry pull him flush against his chest, one of his legs thrown over both of his. He turned his head looking at Harry’s sleeping face, he started to try to move but Harry again pulled him tight. He didn’t like this, he didn’t want to be held down. He squirmed against him earning an ‘mmm’ noise from Harry as something hardened up against his backside.

He gasped feeling Harry move, Harry stirred at this. “Wh… Sirius!?”

“I’m sorry…” Sirius mumbled embarrassed. “Please don’t be mad…”

Harry moved really quickly letting him go. He sat up looking at the closed curtain, he pulled out his wand and Sirius flinched balling himself up. Harry cast a silencing spell before laying down again with his glasses on. He laid facing Sirius, tapping the still teen till he rolled over looking into Harry’s eyes.

“Sirius, I’m not mad.” Harry said eyes tracing his face. Sirius nodded in understanding wiping his eyes as Harry continued. “I’m sorry, I was asleep and didn’t mean to grab you. I also didn’t mean to- well you know.”

Sirius nodded, “I’m sorry I climbed in your bed. I just had such a bad nightmare. I didn’t want to be alone.”

“It’s fine. Do you want to talk about it?” Harry asked carefully reaching out to lay his hand on Sirius’s.

He watched Harry’s fingers intertwine with his and blushed, Sirius took a calming breath. “It was actually a memory... I was little, and Barrick was- holding me down and… forcing himself on me- again.” He squeezed his eyes shut not wanting to cry as he fought a strangled whimper in his throat. Why was he so weak?

“Sirius, you’re not weak.” Harry said sighing. He opened his eyes looking at him curiously, he must have said that out loud. “I have an idea. How about after Dumbledore’s Army we spend time together and work on how you could fight a wizard.”

“Me?” He asked, earning a nod.

“Hermione told me about your bag of battle potions.” Harry said. “Let me help you. I want to know you’re protected, even when I’m not there.”

“Ok…” Sirius said blushing. Harry smiled moving really slowly up to his elbows, he leaned over Sirius placing a kiss to his cheek.

“Come on let’s get up and get breakfast.” Harry said giving his hand a final squeeze.

********

Harry was true to his word and the very next week when everyone left after D.A. Harry looked at him expectantly. He wasn’t sure if he was ready for this. He cast a mournful look at the door and at Hermione and Ron’s retreating backs. He glanced at Harry, it had been about a week since the cheek kiss and Harry acted no different, he just smiled a gestured for where he was to stand.

“Alright, I think we need to start small.” Harry said, as Sirius crossed his arms. “How about dodging?”

“You’re going to throw curses at me?” Sirius said stepping back alarmed.

“No!” Harry said quickly, “Well I mean yes, but nothing that will hurt. Fred and George taught me a color changing spell, it won’t hurt but it will be obvious if you get hit.”

Sirius didn’t feel convinced. Why was he agreeing to let Harry do this too him? He swallowed hard glancing behind him at the door. Harry cleared his throat, “Sirius your default reaction to seeing a wand is to flinch. I know you try to hide it but the truth is that flinching is going to get you killed.”

“So what you’ll have me run and get shot in the back? Have you seen my back? Running doesn’t work.” Sirius countered a little upset.

“Come on Sirius I’m trying here.” Harry said, “You’re goal is to not get hit and knock me down.”

“I’d need a shovel…” He muttered bitterly earning a laugh.

“I promise Sirius I won’t hurt you. Ready?” Harry asked, Sirius sighed but nodded.

Harry counted down, drew his wand. Sirius flinched and now his shirt was red. He sighed, as Harry told him to shake it off, encouraging him to move. They did it again and again, Sirius’s shirt had become every color of the rainbow by the end. Harry sighed, Sirius was sure he was disappointed in him. However Harry walked over handing him a chocolate frog with a gentle smile.

“Sirius you did great. Let me fix your shirt.” Harry said, Sirius ignored him as he changed his shirt back to black devouring the chocolate.

“I really didn’t do great.” Sirius said looking at him through his lashes.

“You’ll get there.” Harry said leaning in, Sirius’s heart sped up. Was he going to get another kiss? He smirked gently turning his face waiting for the soft sensation on his cheek but Harry hesitated before pulling away. “Come on its late, we should go.”

********

Sirius was sore, why did unstinting have to hurt so much he thought miserably. He rolled out of bed quiet literally, almost smacking his face off the floor. He grumbled miserably getting to his feet. Severus and Remus where already gone for the day since they didn’t bother him on unstinting days. Dipsey had dropped off a nice breakfast of waffles with chocolate chips and banana’s.

He basically puttered around all day, mostly sleeping on the couch with Spike. Sixteen was a bad dose he decided as he felt like he had been hit by the crusiatis curse all night, he hadn’t felt this bad from unstunting since the first dose. He slept through lunch and had intentions of sleeping through dinner when Remus woke him.

“Come on Sirius, you need to get up. You’ve been sleeping all day.” Remus said softly.

“If you want me up then carry me.” Sirius groaned rolling back over. Remus chuckled grabbing him under his knees and around his back, Sirius startled as he was lifted bridal style. He looked at him alarmed as Remus struggled to bring them towards the door. “Remus! I’ll walk just put me down!”

“You used to love being carried.” Remus said standing him. He whistled calling Spike as Remus led him out. “I used to carry you everywhere. You would hide your face in my shirt or in Severus’s hair. It’s funny when we started unstunting you it became quite a hassle since you didn’t want to stop being carried.”

“Hilarious.” Sirius said already tired, “Where are we going?”

“Hagrid got a- brain for Spike under preserves. Lucky the little fellow eats once a month. Metabolism like snake. Don’t be grouchy the walk is good for you.” He laughed seeing his face. Sirius sighed he would have rather just had Dipsey bring it to them but he supposed Remus was right the November air was pleasant. What wasn’t pleasant was watching Hagrid shake a brain on a stick enticing Spike who turned his nose up at the still pray. Once interested Sirius whistled and the swooping evil lunged enjoying his smorgasbord. Remus blanched, “Delightful.”

They walked back to the castle, a very full swooping evil draped across his shoulder. Sirius dragged his feet exhausted, he was going to go take a nice hot shower and collapse in bed. He nodded to himself pleased with the idea. Maybe he could get Dipsey to bring him coco with marshmallows. He blinked heavily mumbling the password walking in.

“Happy Birthday!”

He yelled falling backwards into Remus’s arms heart pounding Spike hissing as his friends smiled alarmed in front of him. He sunk to the floor in utter shock and bewilderment, his hands doing little shakes. Dobby jumped around while Dipsey held up a chocolate cake towards him as Regulus and Severus face palmed.

“Dobby, we agreed we wouldn’t yell.” Hermione scolded softly.

“Oh, sorry. Dobby was just so excited. Dobby never though he would see Sirius grow up.”

“Sirius are you alright?” Remus asked as Harry ran forward, together they hauled him to his feet.

“Wh-what’s going on?” He asked trying to calm down.

“It’s your birthday Sirius.” Fred said as George added, “We had to celebrate it.”

He looked at them a little confused still, no one had celebrated his birthday since he was actually five. Harry steered him into the room, as Hermione spoke. “It’s true Sirius, we wanted to surprise you. Although we didn’t want to scare you.”

“But why would you want to celebrate?” Sirius asked fidgeting. “I don’t celebrate my birthday.”

“Because you’re our friend, mate.” Ron said bewildered, “Come on Dobby and Dipsey made chocolate cake.”

“Dobby and Dipsey did not make cake.” Dobby said bouncing up to Harry, “Harry Potter made cake.”

“Harry you made me a cake?” Sirius asked as Harry blushed.

“You always bake me- us sweets. I wanted to bake you something.” Harry said blushing awkwardly, Ginny pursed her lips at this.

Sirius’s eyes lit up, “You like baking? I used to bake with your grandmother Mia and with Lily all the time.”

“Come on Siri, you can talk cooking later. Give me a hug.” Regulus said spinning him out of Harry’s grip holding him. “Merlin you’re getting tall.”

Sirius decided the party was nice they kept it small and simple he preferred it that way. Plus Harry did a good job on the cake. His guardians and Regulus tried to stay out of the way letting the teens have time together. His friends had given him some gifts, which he was a little uncomfortable accepting. The twins gave him brand new Weasley Wizarding Wheeze products, Ron and Ginny gave him sweets, Hermione a book ‘My Life as A Squib’ by Argus Buchanan and Harry gave him nice quality drawing supplies and every flavor chocolates.

Unfortunately unstunting still was taking his toll on him, they sat in the living area talking but Sirius’s head was drooping. Spike ran across his chest before jumping across to Fred and George who thought he was the coolest. Sirius was listening to them talk he would join in now and again but he felt himself tipping. He leaned on Harry the tiniest bit to keep himself upright, Harry turned looking at him smiling fondly. Sirius didn’t notice him to busy watching Fred and George help Spike glide between them.

“Come on, your friends are leaving.” Regulus said snapping him from his sleep on Harry’s shoulder. He sat up a little alarmed, he stretched his back earning a nice pop. He kindly saw his friends to the door, Hermione hugged him goodnight, the twins rusted his hair and Ron waved. Ginny gave a rather curt wave as Harry stepped up giving him a hug. His hands roamed Sirius’s back as he turned his face lips brushing Sirius’s cheek, Sirius held him back again wondering if he would get a kiss this time.

“Come on Harry.” Ginny said, making Harry pull back.

“Happy birthday Sirius.” Harry said. He pulled back completely and waved joining his friends. Ginny flipped her hair smiling at Harry as they left together, Sirius felt a yank in his heart at this.

He walked back into his guardians quarters. The second the door closed Regulus wrapped his arm around his shoulders. “Come on Siri lets go to bed. I’ll spend the night tonight.”

Sirius nodded exhausted from unstunting, he didn’t want to worry about Harry and whatever was or wasn’t going on between them. He smiled at Regulus, hugged his guardian’s goodnight, and then went to bed.

********

Sirius could have sworn Harry did it again at his birthday, he felt his lips ghost his cheek but he didn’t kiss him. He had told Hermione everything that happened between him and Harry on his birthday, and during their nights after D.A. and weeks before in the dormitory. She walked fascinated, nodding along as Sirius talked. He was just so confused, he stared at the ground in a bit of a glare waiting for her to say literally anything. He heard her hum, “Well it sounds like Harry likes you. Do you like him?”

“I- yeah.” Sirius said embarrassed. “Is that weird? Cause I’m so much older. I’m sixteen now but really I’m like thirty something.”

“It’s not weird. And although your age is strange, I don’t think that’s a problem.” Hermione said, as they climbed the quidditch stands. “He did seem really happy when you fell asleep on him.”

“Hermione- maybe the problem is me.” Sirius said she opened her mouth but he cut her off. “I don’t understand him. He seemed so disinterested, and so interested in Ginny and her long pretty hair. Then he’s kissing my cheek, then I thought he’d do it again but didn’t. Maybe I’m looking into this too much?”

Hermione sat back on the bleachers thinking, “Well even if you are Harry clearly has some kind of feelings for you. Why don’t you make a move on him?”

Sirius shook his head, he didn’t think he could do that. She nodded in understanding, “Let’s just watch the game. I don’t think I can handle any more of this.”

She shrugged at him as he sighed watching the field longingly. It was a good game Sirius decided. He wasn’t much for it before but Harry and Regulus liked it, and James when he was alive loved it. They walked across the pitch to meet up with their friends when Hermione stumbled, he reached out grabbing her by the arm. She smiled at him gently thanking him.

“Aww it’s so cute, the mudblood got a squib boyfriend.” Malfoy said dropping down to land next to them. “I knew you were ugly and desperate Granger but that’s low standards even for you.”

“Ignore him.” Hermione said, wrapping her arm around his pulling him towards the Gryffindor quidditch team.

“Whatever. Potter you suck!” Draco yelled earning the attention of those around him. “But at least you’re better then Weasley he’s terrible but I mean he was born in a bin. Did you like my lyrics? Couldn’t find anything that rhymed with fat and ugly. We wanted to talk about his mother.” Draco continued, Fred told him off giving him a nasty look “Couldn’t fit in useless loser for his father.”

“Don’t Ron, he’s not worth it.” Harry said pulling his friend back as Hermione and Sirius joined them. Hermione went up comforting Ron, trying to lead him away while Sirius went to Harry.

“Come on, they live on a farm.” Draco goaded. “So the Weasley’s must be pigs. It would explain the smell. But you like that smell don’t you Potter? Smells better than that muggle place you live. Or perhaps it just reminds you of your pet squib that you want to fuck so bad. Just _take_ him he can’t say no, he should be use to it!”

Sirius’s felt his whole body stiffen, he wanted to die. Malfoy was thrown to the ground by Harry and George. The two started wailing on him as Draco screamed and yelled in pain. He heard Fred and Ron cursing being held back by Hermione and the team. There was a lot of noise before Harry and George where thrown off Malfoy by Madam Hooch’s spell. She wasted no time sending them to the office.

********

Sirius felt terrible, Umbridge had banned Harry and the twins from quidditch. She had then called him to her office, Remus insisted he come with him. Umbridge had a rather tight expression on her face as they sat in front of her. “Mr. Lupin you don’t need to be here.”

“I’m his guardian, I have every right to be here.” Remus said simply crossing his arms.

Her brow twitched at him before turning to Sirius expectantly. “Very well. I expect you know why I called you to my office?”

“You want to know about the fight?” Sirius asked unsure.

“Well yes. I suppose you know who is too blame for it, hmm?”

“Draco Malfoy?” Sirius asked again unsure why she was questioning him.

“Nonsense. Mr. Malfoy is a good student.” She said chuckling into her tea. “They started the fight over you. It’s rather distracting having a _loose young squib_ in Hogwarts.”

“What?” Remus growled as Sirius paled embarrassed his legs tightening unconsciously. Remus turned to him kindly. “Sirius please go wait outside. I need to have a private chat with Ms. Umbridge.”

“That’s Madam Umbridge.” She said sternly putting down her tea. “And I’m not threw talking with him.”

“Skedaddle Sirius.” Remus said nearly cutting her off, a fake smile forming. Sirius didn’t argue he left quickly closing the door. He sat on the floor outside her office listening to a muffled barrage of words coming from within for a few minutes.

“Hello Sirius.” Dumbledore said looking at him kindly. “I was told I might want to be present for this.”

“By who?” Sirius asked, seeing Severus walk up. “Oh… I’m sorry, I didn’t-”

“You aren’t in trouble.” Severus said as the door ripped open.

“In all my years!” Umbridge’s voice sounded as Remus walked out furious, he looked at Sirius smiling softly. Umbridge stormed up behind him hair frazzled she pointed at them both. “As High Inquisitor I hold the rights of the ministry. As enacted by the educational decree number 23. Mr. Lupin I’m letting you go, your services are no longer required, get off the school grounds immediately and take- _him_ with you.”

Sirius saw Severus bristle beside him but Dumbledore spoke first. “You have the ability to let go of my staff, but you cannot remove them from the grounds. You also cannot dismiss Mr. Black, he is a student here.”

“What?” She snapped, “He is not. He’s a squib.”

“Sirius,” Dumbledore said looking at him. “Who teaches you math?”

“Severus and Remus.” He said simply.

“And history?”

“Professor Binns.” Sirius said before adding, “And Minerva teaches me English.”

“And if I’m not mistaken, you go to Care and Keeping of Magical Creatures with the fifth years along with Herbology.” Dumbledore asked, Sirius nodded he just sat in the back but he enjoyed going and watching.

“I’ve also been teaching him potions.” Severus said, “Though he can’t make them himself, he probably knows more recipes by heart then any fifth year.”

“He also make delicious deserts taught to him by Mr. Lupin.” Dumbledore said his eyes twinkling. “As you can see Ms. Umbridge Sirius is indeed a student.”

“Well I never.” She said angrily, she huffed a bit but finally looked at him. “Fine, I want him sorted into a house and wearing a uniform.”

“The hat cannot sort him as was the case with an Angus Buchanan.” Dumbledore said simply, “However I have the strangest feeling that he would be in Gryffindor, home of the lions and the brave.”

Sirius smiled at that, it was Harry and James house. He glanced at Remus and his house too, he shyly looked away from Severus. Umbridge cleared her throat, making a clicking noise. “Very well, if he can’t be sorted he can have a generic Hogwarts uniform. I expect him to wear it. No more- _muggle_ clothes.”

“That can be arranged.” Severus said, “Come on Sirius, Remus, lets go it’s rather late.”

Sirius scrambled to his feet brimming with excitement, he was officially a student at Hogwarts. He never though in a million years this would happen. They walked with Dumbledore when Remus sighed, “I’m sorry Severus I let my temper get the better of me and was let go as a grounds keeper.”

“It’s fine. I’m sure she deserved whatever you said.” Severus said simply. “I can support the three of us.”

The next morning Sirius, could hardly stand still as Severus fitted him into the Hogwarts robes. He felt like a little kid when Regulus and him would sneak out to buy chocolates or visit James. The second he was done, he sprinted out waving bye to them. He had to tell his best friend.

“What’s with the robes?” Ron asked as Sirius sat down excitedly next to Hermione.

“I’m a student now!” Sirius said earning a squeal and hug from the girl, he hugged her back tightly.

“Sirius that’s wonderful.” Harry said leaning forward. “How?”

“Umbridge wanted to throw me and Remus out but Dumbledore pointed out that I’ve been sort of taking classes here anyway. Thus I’m a student!”

“Sirius this is so wonderful!” Hermione cheered, “We can study together all the time. Oh- Merlin we need to catch you up. We should head off to study right now. Lake or Library?”

“Lake,” Sirius answered quickly grabbing a breakfast sandwich to go. “Harry do you want to come? Ron?”

“No I’m good. Have fun.” Harry said waving as Hermione started pulling him.

“Right couple of nerds…” Ron grumbled to Harry as they left.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sirius is a 'student' at Hogwarts! <3


	20. Chapter 20

He felt like he had a huge boast to his confidence after being made a student. He’d written to Regulus and got the greatest reply about how proud he was and how he couldn’t wait to see him at the holiday break. Sirius knew it wasn’t technically the same as the others but, he was handed a tiny three class schedule by a slyly smiling McGonagall and that made it feel very real.

He and Hermione were deep in conversation about Herbology when Harry tapped the table. “We should go, D.A. time.”

They nodded gathering up to head to the room of requirement. Hermione collected her books, trying to stuff them in her bag as they walked. She lurched forward suddenly her books scattering. She sighed spelling them back into her arms.

“I think I’ll drop my books back at the library first. Come with me Siri?” She asked hefting the books up.

Sirius shook his head, “No- I rather get settled before everyone else shows up.”

“Alright, here have a chocolate.” She said handing him a chocolate frog before leaving. He took it happily but also curiously, his friends, guardians and Regulus had been giving him an awful lot of chocolate frogs lately.

“I feel like you guys are walking sweets shops. You always have chocolate frogs on you.” Sirius said crunching away, Harry acted indifferent as they started walking.

“That’s because they’re training you squib.” Malfoy snorted.

“Malfoy.” Harry snapped as they stopped. “Leave him alone. Of course we aren’t training him.”

“No you’re training him like a pet.” Malfoy said Crabbe and Goyle snickered behind him. “Positive reinforcement, but he’s so dumb he didn’t even notice.”

“Shut up Malfoy.” Ron said as they took out their wands.

“What’s wrong Weasley is that how you’re mother trained your lot?” Malfoy sneered.

“Leave him alone, Malfoy.” Sirius said crossing his arms, he was so sick of everyone mostly Draco being a prat to him. He was still nervous about arguing with wizards but he hated being bullied by them.

“Quick Potter give him a chocolate he’s arguing back. Like a trained animal.” Draco snapped. “You know Potter it’s easier to just _hit_ them.”

“You’re such a prat!” Sirius yelled making the whole hallway freeze. He never yelled, never. He panicked he shouldn’t yell at a wizard. Draco deserved it though. He mentally raged war with himself.

“Don’t talk to me like that, you’re beneath me!” Draco yelled throwing a stupefy at him. He stepped away seeing the motion, he reached up grabbing Spike he hurled him at Draco. Spike uncurled knocking the other boy down as he yelled curses at Sirius but Sirius wasn’t done with him. Oh no, Sirius was sick of Draco. He gave a whistle making Spike jump up and at Crabbe, while Sirius himself landed on Malfoy, whacking him. He heard Harry and Ron throwing curses at Goyle as the hall descended into chaos.

“Enough!” Severus’s voice cut through the fight easily. All too quickly every party was lifted into the air save for Sirius who he let tumble off Draco to the floor. Spike flew down returning to his resting spot like nothing happened. “All of you to my office immediately.”

Having six boys crammed in Severus’s office was rather tight but nobody argued. Sirius was shaking between Harry and Ron, while Crabbe and Goyle held Draco up as he moaned holding himself like he had been run over by a troll, nose bleeding and eye blackening. Sirius sucked on his lip in shock trying not to panic. He couldn’t believe he did that.

Severus leaned on his desk heavily, “What. Happened?”

“He attacked me professor.” Draco moaned, “In cold blood. Just like he did to Markus from Drumstrang!”

Sirius started shaking harder at the name, he slouched down a tad as his knees started to give. Harry wrapped an arm around him protectively as he snapped, “Malfoy started it. He tried to curse Sirius! He was only defending himself.”

“It’s true sir.” Ron agreed.

“He threw a swooping evil at me!” Draco yelled, “It tried to eat my brain.”

“You don’t have a brain!” Ron snapped.

“Enough of this.” Severus said, “20points from Slytherin for attacking a student and starting a fight Mr. Malfoy.”

“What!?” Draco snapped, “He’s not a real student he can’t do magic, he’s a pity student.”

“Fine, 50points for attacking an unarmed opponent!” Severus snapped making Ron and Harry smirk surprised. “I think the three of you can do a weeks’ worth of detention with Mr. Filch. While Mr. Potter and company will be serving detention with me scrubbing cauldrons. Starting immediately. Now get out!”

“But Sir!” Draco argued but a nasty look from Severus sent them running door slamming.

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” Sirius pleaded, his knees giving out making Harry support him completely. “It’s my fault! I’m a bad squib!”

“Not this again…” Severus said coming around the desk grabbing Sirius to pull him into a hug. Sirius clung tightly, he was embarrassed but also so scared of being rejected. “You three can start your detention tomorrow. Go run your club.”

“Sir?” Harry asked.

“Don’t argue with a good thing Potter. Sirius do you want to come with me or go with your friends?” Severus asked, Sirius took a few calming breathes before looking at Harry. He stepped away rubbing his face clean. “Alright have fun.”

“Thanks Severus.” Sirius muttered getting a small soft smile in return.

Severus looked up glaring nastily at Harry and Ron all the softness in his voice gone. “Tomorrow 5pm detention. Don’t be late.”

“Yes Professor.” They said in unison, as Sirius chuckled.

**********

Sirius was yanked unceremoniously into Umbridge’s office she glared at him around a fake smile, her mounted cat plates meowing loudly at him. Her smile tightened, “Have a seat Mr. Black.”

Sirius sat down and watched her curiously as she sat at her desk adding far too many sugars to her tea. “I heard from one of my best students that you’ve been causing fights again.”

“Well actually-”

“Ah- Ah. I wasn’t done talking.” She said wiggling her finger at him like he was a small child still. “He tells me that you have a very much illegal pet at school, a swooping evil. Honestly attacking someone with one of those. Tsk-tsk. You could be sent to Azkaban.”

Sirius froze up at this, he felt like he might start twitching as she stood up looking over him. “Where is it? So we can dispose of it and we’ll let this slip under the rug. As a squib you probably didn’t know any better.”

Sirius licked his lips, eyes darting around the room trying to stall for time. Spike was curled up tight and wouldn’t come out unless he wanted him to. He looked at her, he shouldn’t lie to a witch. He bit his lip nibbling away, he didn’t want Spike to die though because of him. “Severus took him away.”

His breath hitched as she scowled at him. He’d just lied to a witch, he’d never done that. She marched to her floo throwing powder in it demanding Snape come to her office immediately. He blanched, he was pretty sure Severus would cover for him but he could still get in trouble. She turned back to him smiling.

“Well while we wait, I have some lines for you to write.” She said handing him a quill and parchment. “Before you ask you don’t need any ink. I want you to write ‘I am just a squib’ until the message sinks in.”

She smiled at him sitting to watch sipping her tea. Sirius looked at her confused from his little desk. He started writing feeling pain in his hand, he knew what this was he had seen Harry’s mark and the twins marks. It hurt but it was barely a tickle compared to other things he’d been through, he wrote steadily making her glare at him.

A knock on the door and Severus entered, “You wanted to see me.”

He gave Sirius a questioning look, eyes widening at the quill and his hand. He reached over snatching it from him, in a fluid motion he’d snapped the quill in half. Umbrigde was standing now looking furious. “Professor Snape might I remind you of educational act number-”

“I don’t have time for your nonsense. Quills like this are illegal to use on students.” Severus said signaling Sirius to him. Sirius happily joined him, as Severus wrapped his arm around him. “Now unless you have something of importance to say, we will be taking our leave.”

Umbridge looked very bitter at this like she had swallowed a lemon flavored candy. “Very well, Mr. Black tells me that you took away the swooping evil in question on the attack of Mr. Malfoy.”

He saw Severus brow twitch but he gave her a look like she was stupid. “Of course I took it away. Do you think I’m incompetent?”

She bristled at this but Severus was already herding him out the door. They were halfway back to their quarters when Sirius dared to look at him. “I’m sorry I lied. But she was going to kill Spike and-”

“Next time she does something like that just leave, or throw one of your sticking potions at her. Look at your poor hand.” Severus said wincing, “Your father and Regulus are going to kill me.”

“You’re not mad?” Sirius asked ignoring the father comment looking at him needing the reassurance.

“Of course not.” He said wrapping his arm around him pressing a kiss to the top of his head.

**********

It was a full moon tonight, so Severus and Remus where off. He stretched out on his transfigured bed in Gryffindor as Ron closed his curtain wishing them goodnight. He rolled over nibbling his lip as Harry pulled his curtains almost closed. Harry glanced around the room before pulling back his covers patting the bed. Sirius furrowed his brow before slowly approaching and climbing in with Harry.

“So you don’t have to sneak in later.” He said as he shut the curtain the rest of the way casting a silencing charm.

“Harry you don’t have to.” Sirius said, Harry shushed him softly.

“Sirius, it’s fine I get nightmares too.” Harry said as they laid looking at each other in the darkness. “Hey Siri. Can I ask you something?”

“What is it Harry?” Sirius asked pulling the blankets up.

“Do you like Hermione?”

“Yeah, she’s my best friend.” Sirius said, “Unless you mean romantically then no. Why?”

“Something Ginny said made me curious. Don’t worry about it.” Harry said, “Night Sirius.”

“Umm… Night Harry.” Sirius said slightly confused closing his eyes drifting to sleep.

He woke up with Harry basically on top of him. Sirius tried to moved but Harry’s upper body and arm were thrown over him, he also felt a leg between his. He wiggled a little hearing a moan at his motions and Harry’s morning wood against his groin. He swallowed hard, reminding himself Harry wasn’t doing this on purpose. He steeled himself, he would not cry on him like last time. He reached up poking Harry with his free hand.

“H-Harry.” He hated the way his voice wavered. “Harry, wake up please.”

Harry jerked pressing his leg flush with Sirius’s member making him jump blushing and feeling the beginning of panic. He didn’t like being trapped like this. Harry sat up a little groggily grabbing his glasses he looked down seeing Sirius’s face literally inches away. He seemed startled and Sirius hoped he would get off but Harry smiled down at him instead. He shifted a hand resting on Sirius’s face, Sirius stiffened out of habit.

“Morning Sirius.” Harry said, quickly lips pressed against his cheek putting a kiss there. He sat back readjusting his position his hips accidently giving the slightest of movements grinding into him as Harry rolled off. He did not want to feel any more friction from Harry between his legs.

“Morning… Harry.” Sirius said his eyes feeling rather wide as he swallowed. He looked at him lips pursed as the other teen stretched. “Why do you always do that?”

“Sorry do what?” He asked smiling at him.

“Kiss my cheek? Then you do this weird sort of kiss thing. Why?”

Harry’s face sunk, “I’m sorry. I’m rubbish at this.”

“Rubbish at what?” Sirius asked.

“Sirius.” Harry said looking at him. “I fancy you but I didn’t want you to feel like you had to kiss back… Do you fancy me?”

“I don’t know what that means.” Sirius said genuinely confused.

Harry looked at him curiously. “Sirius, has no one ever hit on you?”

“What?” Sirius gasped alarmed flinching back further into his pillow.

“No- no! Not hit you. Ugh…” Harry held his face in his hands as Sirius started looking at the curtain nervously. He heard Harry take a deep breath through his fingers, “Sirius. Do you like it when I kiss you?”

Sirius turned his head looking at him, he nibbled his lip nervously as Harry sighed defeated. “…Yes...”

Harry’s head shot up. “You do? But you don’t try to kiss back.”

Sirius rolled over to look at him. “I’m sorry- I’ve never been kissed like that by someone that wasn’t Reggie or my guardians.”

“Don’t be sorry.” Harry said scooting closer to him. “You can stop me at any time but- Can I kiss you now?” Sirius nodded turning his face offering his cheek, Harry chuckled. “I meant your lips.”

Sirius blushed biting his bottom lip before nodding slowly. Harry reached out cupping his face bringing him in kissing him very slowly. It was nice. Sirius wasn’t really sure what to do, he’d never had a kiss that wasn’t forced on him. He moved his lips against Harry’s and closed his eyes. It must have been right because Harry’s body moved flush to his, his hands wrapping around his back. Sirius didn’t feel restricted, even as he kept a hand between them ready to shove Harry.

He was just starting to enjoy it when he felt Harry grind against him. Immediately he wanted to pull back. He shoved his hand into Harry, eyes wide. “Please don’t.”

“Sirius?” Harry asked as the other teen sat up holding himself.

“I’m sorry Harry. I can’t do it.” Sirius said face contorting. He hated himself but he couldn’t have sex with Harry. It always hurt, his hair would be pulled, he’d get bruises, get dirty and his bottom would kill him for days even if he didn’t rip. He looked at Harry eyes watering, “It always hurts Harry. I like you, please don’t make me do it.”

Harry’s brows furrowed before going up in realization. “Sirius I’m not trying to have sex with you. I just want to kiss you.”

“But you’re getting hard. Barrick said if I make it hard I need to take care of it.”

“He said that to you!” Harry growled sitting up, Sirius flinched at his anger. Harry closed his eyes breathing deeply through his nose, he opened them slowly looking at him. He spoke as gently as he could, “I promise, I just want to kiss you Sirius. I really like you, I want you to be happy doing this too. I’ll slow it down. Alright?”

“Ok…” Sirius whispered feeling Harry’s hands move to his face pulling him back in. He closed his eyes and let the kiss continue. It was nice.

**********

Sirius was a bit confused as to what they were, they never put a label on it. However when they were alone Harry would kiss him and he liked it. Harry had learned quickly not to touch his hair when snogging, he’d had it pulled too much in the past to be completely comfortable with it being touched during their make outs. Sirius had learned not to panic when Harry got excited during these kissing sessions. He was sure Harry would want more eventually but he wasn’t sure how to handle it when the time came.

“Sirius,” Harry said poking him playfully in the side. They were supposed to be studying but Harry was barley attempting to, while Sirius was finishing his paper. Harry poked him again, “Sirius, do you want to go on a date?”

“Umm… Alright.” Sirius said eyes going down.

“What’s wrong? You don’t seem happy.” Harry said taking his hand.

“I- I don’t know…” Sirius said. “I get stared at enough. And after Skeeter’s article I don’t want to basically be considered ‘your squib’ or ‘your pet’ again.”

“Then we won’t tell people.” Harry said thumb rubbing his burn scar giving him a sweet smile, Sirius turned his hand so their fingers where laced.

“Alright if we don’t tell people.” Sirius said. Harry smiled brightly pulling his hand up kissing his knuckles.

Sirius didn’t tell his guardians about his date, he didn’t want them to fuss over him. However that didn’t save him from the second Harry had shown up they both seemed to pick up on it and where instantly off. Severus had pulled him aside to remind him he could say no at any point and if Harry didn’t listen he was told to sick Spike on him, which had him scrambling away embarrassed. Only to enter into a room where Harry looked like he was sweating bullets as Remus smiled politely with a firm hand on his shoulder, he didn’t want to know.

“I- I’ll have him home before nine sir.” Harry stuttered glancing at Remus.

“Oh thank you Harry that would be lovely.” Remus said approvingly.

“Here’s some money.” Severus said handing him a small pile of galleons. “Be safe.”

“Ok thanks bye.” Sirius said practically shoving Harry out away from their heated glares.

They walked to Hogsmeade in relative silence each too nervous to say anything. Harry looked at him, “So err… Do you like Italian?”

“Harry you’ve seen me try to eat my weight in pasta on multiple occasions.” Sirius said trying to joke to break the tension, Harry blushed furiously.

“Right! So- Umm… How about Skarmoy’s?” Harry said leading the way to a hole in the wall little restaurant. They were seated quickly, Harry had asked for a table in the back which Sirius preferred. He stared at the menu occasionally glancing up at Harry shyly, while Harry did the same to him. The tension was killing him and he didn’t understand why, he’d hung out with Harry plenty of times alone.

“Do you know what you’re getting?” He asked, “I think I want eggplant parm.”

“I’m thinking of getting the alfredo chicken.” Harry said, they placed their orders along with butterbeers and waters. Then it was back to awkward silence. Harry looked up, “So is this your first date?” Sirius cocked a brow at him, “Sorry stupid question.”

“Yes, it’s my first date.” Sirius said before tapping his chin. “Although James once took me on a ‘date’. I spit up a rootbeer float and helped him pick out an engagement ring for Lily. Not very romantic.”

“You helped pick out my mom’s engagement ring?” Harry asked smiling.

“Yeah, he was too nervous to go alone.” Sirius said spinning is drink with his straw. “I was also their ring bearer. I was scared to death, dropped the pillow and ran.”

“That’s hilarious.” Harry laughed leaning in.

“Hey it was scary having everyone staring at me.” Sirius defended, “I don’t know how you do it playing quidditch. I’d hate all that attention.”

That seemed to break the ice, conversation flowed normally between them. They laughed, talked and smiled. They got deserts, Sirius some tiramisu, Harry a cannoli. They enjoyed their time together, Harry insisted he paid. Then he took him to Honeydukes, Sirius was nervous at first as it was very crowded but Harry was there annd made him feel protected. He was bumped into however it was less nerve-racking with Harry. He made a point of buying Sirius a nice box of chocolates and a pack of sugar quills.

They shared the sugar quills walking around Hogsmeade it was getting dark when they leisurely made their way back to Hogwarts. He looked down as he talked feeling Harry’s hand bump his as he stepped closer. Sirius glanced at him seeing the blush on his face. He nudged his hand back curiously, flushing nervously when Harry took his hand. Ever so gently they laced their fingers together. 

**********

“Today is a special day.” Professor Sprout announced happily, “We’ll be going to greenhouse 3. Be careful now as you all remember greenhouse 3 has more sentient plants so scream if something grabs you. Partner up.”

Sirius and Harry immediately side stepped into each other. Hermione and Ron looked a little put off at losing their preferred partners but teamed up all the same. Sprout smiled glancing over the students before stopping at Sirius, she shook her head. “No offence to Mr. Potter but I rather you with a more experienced student pumpkin. Neville sweet potato come be Mr. Black’s partner. Mr. Potter you can work with Ms. Brown.”

Reluctantly Harry moved to be with Lavender while Neville came up smiling at Sirius. Professor Sprout collapsed her hands together leading the group to the door of the greenhouse. Where she began explaining about the bubotubers, “You will be squeezing them to collect the pus-”

“Pus?” Seamus said disgusted.

“Yes pus.” Professor Sprout said, “It’s extremely valuable so don’t waste it. You’ll be collecting it in these bottles.” She levitated the bottles to the students along with dragon hide gloves. “Now the pus can do funny things to skin when not diluted so wear your gloves. Follow me.”

They followed her inside as she sorted them two to a table, Neville rubbed his hands together as he stared at the plant. Sirius thought it was rather ugly black slug looking thing with shiny yellow pimples, it also wiggled and smelt of petrol. Neville whistled, “Ain’t she a beauty?”

“You and I have very different definitions of beauty.” Sirius said putting on his own gloves as Neville lifted the plant inspecting it.

“No- we got a good one.” Neville said gently turning it. “Very healthy, lots of spores. Did you know when diluted the pus acts as a great remedy for acne?”

“Err… I’ll keep that in mind.” Sirius said as Neville smirked. They listened quietly as Professor Sprout gave them instructions on milking the plant. Neville looked eager placing the plant down and opening the vials inspecting them for cracks, breaks and cleanliness.

“Well done Mr. Longbottom. Always best to inspect your equipment before use. 5points to Gryffindor.” Professor Sprout said as she came up to them smiling. She looked around before heading off towards the next table.

Neville held the plant firm using his pointer finger and thumb to massage pus into the vial. Sirius watched a little disgusted at the green goo he had the plant releasing. Neville smiled, “Told you we had a good one. She’s producing like a champ. Sirius can you get another vial and I’ll help you?”

Sirius did what he was told, Neville watched over his shoulder as he copied him. “I feel like I’m popping a pimple…”

“Nonsense!” Neville said, “It’s more like- ok like popping a pimple. Don’t squeeze too hard, you’ll bruise it.”

They switched back again, Neville milking it and Sirius could swear he was whispering sweet nothings to the plant. He leaned against the trout to their side watching him, he rest his hands on planter amused. Neville glanced at him warning him not to lean to far back least he disrupt the leaping toadstools behind him, Sirius nodded watching him continue. He felt something brush his right hand, he moved it quickly assuming he disturbed one.

“I love herbology.” Neville hummed.

“These plants are disgusting!” Draco snapped as pus dripped from his and Crabbe’s hands globing onto the floor. He whipped his hands splattering the pus across the back of two Gryffindor girls making them scream.

“Mr. Malfoy! I warned you to be careful.” Professor Sprout scolded running up magicing the girls robes clean. “Did it touch your skin?” They shook their heads no, as Professor Sprout rounded on Draco. “10points from Slytherin, for being unsafe with dangerous materials and wasting perfectly good bubotubers pus.”

Sirius rolled his eyes as Neville turned to him, "Your turn-”

He cut Neville off screaming curses as something sharp wrapped around his right wrist and forearm yanking him hard. He spun facing it as the vines dug into his skin, he tried desperately to uncurl them from him as his feet dragged across the dirt floor. The vine reached higher aiming to strangle him. Neville ran up wrapping an arm around his torso and up over his shoulder helping keep him still and keeping the vine from his neck. He raised his wand and did a severing charm on the vine. They both tumbled backwards landing in a rough heap, Sirius still rapidly trying to uncurl the stinging vine.

“Oh sweet Merlin!” Professor Sprout yelled running up she crouched in front of them wand out. She cast a charm uncurling the tightly wound vine as Harry, Ron and Hermione ran up. She looked at his arm as Sirius finally breathed in relief, it was very red and bleeding where the vine had him, little needles where still sticking out of his arm. “Venomous tentacula, very good thinking Neville. You dear need to go to the medical wing.”

“I’ll take him!” Harry said quickly stepping forward.

“You go too Mr. Longottom.” She said gesturing towards his reddening hand.

“What was that thing?” Sirius asked holding his right arm tight to his chest, Harry extremely close to him as they walked.

“Venomous tentacula.” Neville said, “They can eat people, venomous bite and they will try to strangle their victims. You’re lucky I think your neck was just out of range so it was trying to pull you closer.”

“I feel so lucky.” Sirius moaned as they entered the infirmary. Neville stumbled up onto a bed while Harry helped Sirius sit across from him. Madam Pomfrey went straight to work giving Sirius and Neville clam aids and pain relievers. She then sat down next to Sirius and began the slow process of removing the stinging needles from his arm while her aid worked on Neville’s hand.

The doors burst open as Minerva, Severus and Remus rushed into the room. Minerva spoke quickly, “Mr. Longbottom, Mr. Black good heavens children are you alright?”

“Fine Professor.” Neville said looking away watching the aid remove the needles.

“Venomous tentacula can kill. Are you sure?” She asked again her face scrunched up as she looked at them both fearfully. “It didn’t bite?”

“It only grabbed them Professor.” Harry said as Sirius squeezed his hand against the pain.

“I hate those plants…” Remus growled, glancing at Severus. “They’ve attacked two people I love.”

“Yes…” Minerva said rather darkly hand to her chest she cleared her throat. “Mr. Longbottom 5points to Gryffindor for your quick thinking.”

“You mean 20points.” Severus said bluntly.

**********

Two weeks later Harry’s class of D.A. students where saying their goodbyes for Christmas break. He smirked at Harry from his chair, when he heard a hissing sound above him. He looked up seeing Spike twisting in the tinsel at the top of the Christmas tree. He walked up giving a whistle but his little friend only twisted and hissed harder.

“You’re stuck aren’t you?” Sirius asked grabbing the nearby column. He wedged his fingers into the groves pulling himself up to the swooping evil. He could hear Harry talking to a girl, Cho, he glanced over at them in the corner of the room. He wasn’t sure if they saw him, they seemed to be talking about something important. He braced himself and leaned out using one hand to detangle Spike.

“Mistletoe.” Cho said as Sirius freed Spike, he held out his hand as he crawled to his earlobe, he was getting bigger. Sirius glanced at Harry ready to climb down only to see Cho and him kissing. In shock his grip started to slip, he held tighter but his hands were sweating. He skidded down the column rather quickly catching himself halfway.

“Oh Cho,” Harry was saying as Sirius panted holding tight. He tried to look at them but couldn’t see them anymore. He felt so stupid of course Harry would rather someone that could do magic. He heard Harry’s voice continue, “I’m sorry. Cho, you’re a nice girl but I like someone else.”

He heard a strangled cry before the door slammed. Harry had rejected her. He heard Harry sigh walking around the room, “Sirius? Are you in here?”

Sirius thumped his head against the pillar. Harry wouldn’t be mad at him for accidentally spying, he knew that. He carefully slipped down the column his boots making a scuffing noise as he went alerting Harry. He jumped off once low enough, landing in front of his waiting form. He straighten up embarrassed, “Umm… Sorry, Spike got stuck in the tree. I swear I wasn’t spying! Or at least not on purpose.”

“It’s fine. Is Spike ok?” Harry asked gently as Sirius nodded. “Come on let’s sit. I’m sorry you had to see that. She really surprised me, kissing me like that.”

“It’s alright.” Sirius said as they walked even though he glared at the ground, his chest hurting.

“She just didn’t know about us. That’s all.” Harry said motioning for him to sit in his favorite chair. “There is an us, right Sirius?”

“I’m not following.” Sirius said looking at him confused as Harry sat on the armrest.

Harry chuckled lightly taking his hand. “I guess what I’m asking is- Sirius will you be my boyfriend?”

Sirius blinked wide eyed at him, before taking his hand back slowly Harry’s face fell. Sirius collapsed his hands together, “I’m not right, Harry. I- I really like you. I feel safe when I’m with you. But, I’m not right.”

“Sirius I don’t care about your age or that you’re a squib.” Harry said moving to be more in front of him his hands on either armrest. “I like you. I like you exactly how you are.”

Sirius rubbed his fingers over the scars on his hands. “It’s not that…”

“Then what is it?” Harry asked, “How could I show that I truly care for you?”

“I told you that I’ve been forced to do- a lot of things.” Sirius said face getting red as Harry nodded. “I never healed right… Harry, I have nothing to give you that hasn’t already been taken.”

“Sirius you don’t need to give me anything.” Harry said, “You are enough.”

“Harry.” Sirius said as Harry leaned in kissing him gently. Sirius kissed back climbing out of the chair, pushing Harry down sitting on his lap, surprising the other teen. He wrapped his arms around Harry’s neck as Harry wrapped his around his waist. He moved a little on Harry’s lap bringing them closer together, his eyes glazed over trying to dissociate feeling Harry’s erection.

“Sorry, I’ll move.” Harry said grabbing Sirius’s hips trying to move him.

“No it’s fine.” Sirius said determined, scooting back into place trying to force his mind to be in the moment with Harry. “You’re my boyfriend. I trust you. Umm… I still don’t want to tell people. And I just might not react the same when doing- this.” Sirius said trying to control the shaking in his body. “But I want to be with you, I trust you.”

“Sirius.” Harry said happily pulling them flush together kissing him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Neville MVP of this chapter.  
> Boys finally figuring things out. A happy little secret relationship.  
> IDK why this chapter feels short its the same length as normal...


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I'm updating weird this week. Big updates Monday and Thursday, so none of Wednesday and Friday. Going to go away for a long weekend.

Remus watched Regulus pace erratically around their home wringing his hands. He sighed as his old friend grabbed a bottle off the counter taking a swig from it directly before continuing to pace. “Regulus, it’s alright.”

“It’s not alright.” Regulus countered, checking the floo again. “Dumbledore called they’re supposed to be on their way. Mr. Weasley was attacked and Harry saw it. Do you know what this means?”

“That my husband is going to be really pissed about teaching Harry occlumency? Really Regulus it will be alright.” Remus said, “Severus is a good teacher even if his temper is short.”

“If Voldemort realizes his connection, he could see through Harry’s eyes. He could get us all killed.” Regulus said looking like he was going to continue pacing when the room flared, undoubtedly a port key. The Weasley’s, Hermione and Harry holding Sirius a little low on his waist for Remus’s taste, though Sirius seemed happy at the touch. Remus perked excited he hadn’t seen Sirius in a little while, choosing to go back and forth between the school and home since he was let go. He took a step forward ready to grab him but Sirius ran past him.

“Reggie!” Sirius cried tackling Regulus hard enough to nearly knock him down.

“Sirius.” Regulus said wrapping him up tight hug, he held out an arm as Harry approached hugging him as well. “Oh I missed you two.”

“It’s great to see you and all Regulus but what about our dad?” Ron said stepping forwards.

“Is he alright?” Ginny asked.

“Your father will be fine.” Remus said stepping forwards holding up a letter in his hands. “This arrived moments before you all did. It’s from your mother. Here.”

He handed it off to Fred who immediately started reading it to his siblings. Remus smiled sadly at them before feeling a body press into him. He looked down surprised to see Sirius’s head right bellow shoulder level hugging him. He smiled wrapping his arms around him, pressing a kiss to his temple.

“Come on all of you.” Regulus said his arm over Harry’s shoulders. “The rooms are made up. Go to bed and in the morning Molly said she would come by to take you to see your father.”

Reluctantly they agreed. Remus sighed as Sirius pulled away to join Harry. Once they were gone he turned to Regulus. “We should retire as well. Unless you had plans to kiss that bottle all night.”

“No.” Regulus said corking it. “Hmm… I normally sleep with Siri, but with all the others, plus the girls are taking the spare room... Guess I’ll bunk with you. Does Sirius still get nightmares at school?”

“Unfortunately.” Remus said as they walked up the stairs. “I sometimes wake up to him pacing, needing to talk or asleep on the floor of my room.”

The next morning Remus sipped his coffee, he’d woken up to Regulus and Sirius on the transfigured bed in his room, it was sweet really. Regulus suddenly threw himself in the seat across from him looking bemused. Remus raised a brow at him waiting for an explanation. His friend didn’t seem intent on giving him one, he just slouched in his chair watching the door with a smirk. A few minutes later Sirius came in looking embarrassed.

Remus couldn’t take the way the two brothers where acting both giving each other some seriously strange looks. Remus cleared his throat setting down his cup, “Something on your mind Sirius? Regulus?”

They each looked up matching expressions of surprise. Sirius looked at Regulus like he was pleading with his brother silently. Regulus sighed giving in, “It’s nothing. Its fine. Don’t worry it’s not anything bad.”

“Enlighten me.” Remus said leveling Regulus with a look the other laughed.

“Well if Moony insists. I tried to wake Sirius up and I was told ‘five more minutes _Harry_ ’.” He said Harry’s name in a lovey way, giving his eyes a little flutter making Sirius sink in his chair. Remus chuckled deeply as Regulus continued, “Honestly big brother, it’s cute.”

“I hate you so much.” Sirius said looking like he was trying to disappear as Regulus made an exaggerated expression of hurt.

“Right, well are you two dating?” Remus asked getting an embarrassed nod. “Severus and I thought that was a date. Harry, he respects you? Treats you well? Doesn’t force-”

“Oh Merlin! Yes Remus!” Sirius stuttered out quickly. “We’re fine. And he respects me. Please don’t tell anyone. We’re keeping it a secret because of how I’ve been treated in the past. I don’t want to be his ‘pet’ or ‘his squib’ again.”

“Our lips are sealed.” Remus said kindly.

“Honestly it’s about time. You two can’t stop making googly eyes at each other.” Regulus said smirking as Sirius groaned.

“When the time comes Sirius come talk to me. I’ll buy you some protection.” Remus said sipping his coffee, getting a horrified look from Regulus and a wide eyed stare from Sirius. Sirius stood up without a word and went to stress bake as Regulus continued giving him the horrified look. Remus sighed, unfolding the Daily Prophet.

“Remus. What the hell!?” Regulus snapped, “He’s my brother and he’s my godson, I never wanted to picture that!”

“Grow up. They’ll want to do _it_ eventually.” Remus said with an eye roll.

A sharp whistle had Spike landing on the table hissing at them both. They jumped back alarmed before looking at an embarrassed Sirius. “Stop talking!”

Hours later Molly showed up looking a tad wrecked, her makeup was running under her eyes but she smiled brightly hugging her children. When she saw Harry she wrapped him tightly in her arms. “Oh thank you! Thank you! You saved Arthur’s life.”

She kissed Harry’s forehead, holding him tightly again. When she finally released him Ginny approached her mother, “So dad will be ok?”

“Yes dear. He’ll be ok. In time.” She said holding her by the shoulders. “Come, come. Who’s going to go see daddy?”

The whole Weasley clan surged forward, Ginny pulling Harry with them. Remus noticed the sad side eye Sirius gave them. He drummed his fingers on the table as Hermione wrapped her arm around Sirius’s as they stepped back together. Molly looked at them both, “Hermione, Sirius, aren’t you coming dears?”

“Oh we don’t want to intrude.” Hermione said.

Molly shook her head, “Nonsense. Come on everyone grab the portkey.”

“Mrs. Weasley I can’t use a portkey.” Sirius said, “I need someone to take me through.”

“We got you mate.” Fred said as the twins looped their arms around him snugly. George added, “Hold Spike tight.”

With a loud crack they disappeared, Remus looked at Regulus amused. “He’s got good friends.”

“You don’t know how happy that makes me Remus.” He said sighing, “Though I don’t think he’s a fan of Ginny.”

Remus chuckled, “When I was his age I wasn’t a fan of you. I thought you fancied Severus.”

Regulus laughed, “Well he is quiet the fox. Will he be by?”

Remus shook his head, “Umbridge is running the staff ragged. He won’t be free until just before Christmas.”

Christmas was nice this year. Remus could still see Sirius was not a fan but being surrounded by his friends had certainly done wonders for how he reacted. Severus had been less than thrilled to see their house full of children that weren’t theirs. He had basically come home and immediately went back to the school. However Remus had convinced him to come back a few days before the students were to return to Hogwarts.

He was thrilled, Sirius and the rest of the mob where gone visiting Mr. Weasley in St. Mungo’s and weren’t expected home for hours. Regulus was- well he assumed somewhere in the house. Severus was reading but Remus was feeling frisky. He walked up to him smiling, Severus ignored him. Not to be deterred he leaned in kissing his neck.

“Pay attention to me.” He said strictly unbuttoning Severus’s shirt. “Kids are gone. House to ourselves. Come on.”

“I will not have you disrobe me in the living room, least someone enter.” Severus said batting him off.

“Fine. Let’s go to the bedroom and I’ll give you a broom ride-”

“Sorry to interrupt.” Regulus said pointedly looking away covering his eyes.

“Regulus.” Severus said crossing his arms. “But this is what I mean Remus, what if that was Sirius.”

Remus glared at Regulus as he sat next to his husband. Regulus rolled his eyes huffing, throwing himself into a chair. “Again, sorry to interrupt but this is important.”

“Better be…” Remus muttered.

“There’s been a mass breakout of Azkaban.” He said tossing the Daily Prophet at them.

Remus caught the paper scanning the names, “You’re crazy cousin got out, along with her husband.”

“What about Barrick?” Severus said leaning over him to read.

“He’s not listed, thank Merlin.” Regulus said. “You guys need to watch Siri closely I don’t want Bellatrix anywhere near my brother.”

“Will do. Now get out.” Remus snapped.

“Get a room.”

“It’s my house!”

**********

Sirius was bored, school was boring, he rather work in the fields but since Dumbledore had made him a ‘student’ he was no longer permitted to work. He often found himself hovering behind Severus bringing him ingredients and help make potions. Though he couldn’t actually make potions Severus let him chop and mince things. He ended up helping him so much so that Severus agreed to let him sit in on classes but he had to stay at Severus’s desk behind safety charms. He also loved going to the room of requirement to watch D.A. though the room would not open for a squib he simply had to be with one of his friends.

Things with Harry were different, although he agreed to be his boyfriend he had specifically asked him not to tell people. He didn’t want any attention from it and Harry had agreed kindly understanding after the trouble Rita Skeeter caused them last year. He wrote to Regulus regularly, he really missed him. Harry seemed to agree with him on this, as they would write and send their letters together. They had just sent off letters to Remus who they knew would give them to Regulus when Harry pulled Sirius’s hand.

“Sirius. You know Snape’s giving me occlumency lessons right?” Harry asked earning a nod. “Could you ask him to lighten up on me? He’s going through my memories really quickly and I’m afraid of what he’ll find. You know- about us.”

Sirius blushed heavily, “Well he knows we’re together. But he’s not the one you need to worry about, Remus is a thousand times more protective… But yeah I’ll mention something- Firenze?”

“Sirius?” The centaur said walking up to them. “Harry Potter.”

“You two know each other?” Harry asked, eyes darting to either.

“We met when Sirius lived in the forest.” Firenze said, pointing at his ear. “Still keeping the Death Flier I see?”

“I’ll have you know Spike is very well trained.” Sirius said smirking, “What are you doing here? And how do you know Harry?”

“Your teacher was let go so I’m taking her place as the new Divination teacher. As to Harry I rescued him when he was younger when he was in the forbidden forest.” Firenze said stooping to their level, he cocked his head at them gently smiling. “I’m sad I will never be let home again but I am happy to be able to see my human friends. I hope you are both in my class.”

“I will be. Unfortunately Sirius can’t take divination though.” Harry said wrapping an arm around him.

“Such a shame.” Firenze replied softly, “Understandable though, his talents lie elsewhere. I need to set up my classroom. Farewell Sirius and Harry Potter.”

They waved after him when Harry started leading him to the room of requirements. Sirius faltered following, he stood by rocking on his feet as Harry paced making the door appear. Once open they entered slowly being the first to arrive, Spike immediately launched off Sirius swooping up the high points in the ceiling.

“We’re early.” Sirius said moving to his chair, climbing over the arm to drop into it, feet over the armrest. “Why are we here so early?”

“I wanted some alone time with you.” Harry said making Sirius say ‘oh’. Harry walked up to him placing his hands on either side of the chair grinning at Sirius making the shorter teen blush. “If that’s ok with you?”

“It’s fine.” Sirius mumbled out nervously smiling.

Harry leaned down capturing his lips, moving his hands to the base of Sirius’s head. Sirius reached up arms coming up Harry’s body to loop up over his shoulders. Slowly Harry moved his face kissing down Sirius’s jaw, then to his neck, moving down lower to suck and kiss at the pale skin. Sirius sighed softly into the sensation, Harry was always so gentle with him. He felt himself get shifted as Harry moved, a hand coming down to the base of his shirt. Sirius froze up for a moment as Harry’s hand rested firmly on his hip pulling him closer. Sirius ignored his rising fear. Harry is good, Harry will stop if he asks, he reminded himself.

“Sirius…” Harry said in a needy way, he leaned forward more climbing onto the chair with him. Sirius moved not wanting to be pinned down, they ended up side by side with Sirius’s legs over Harry to fit. They were still kissing, his hands wrapped around Harry’s shoulders, one of Harry’s hands on the base of his neck the other- he felt his pants unzip. Immediately he pushed back scared, but Harry simply reached for his face again.

“Sirius, I promise on my magic that I’m not going to hurt you. I just want to try to do something, more.” Harry said as gently as possible. “You don’t have to reciprocate to me. And I’ll stop if you want. Alright?”

Sirius wanted to do more with him, he really did. He looked at Harry, he said he’d stop. “Alright…”

Sirius bit his lip as Harry moved back in kissing his jaw and back up to his lips. He closed his eyes kissing back as Harry undid Sirius’s pants reaching in. Sirius started to feel his arms shake around Harry, he pinched his eyes shut ready for the pain. He gasped, back arching as Harry wrapped his hand around his member giving it gentle pumps. He froze up his heart beating rapidly, his legs tightening together. He’d never been touched like this before, or at least not this nicely.

“Calm down. Calm down.” Harry said gently kissing the side of his face. “Your heart is beating out of control.”

Sirius stuttered around his words, trying to express how he felt as Harry stroked him. Harry paused asking if he wanted him to stop. Sirius shook his head violently, Harry chuckled lightly continuing his motions. Sirius clung to him face in his shoulder shaking, it felt so good. Harry’s thumb rubbed the slit of his member making him gasp.

He wished he could stop shaking but he just couldn’t. He’d been so hurt in the past and now Harry was making him feel good and didn’t expect anything in return. Harry would stop if he needed him to, why was Harry so wonderful. His eyes were watering, it didn’t hurt, he just felt so happy.

He pulled his head back kissing Harry, clinging to him tighter pushing his hips up. Harry pumped a little harder, Sirius gasped enjoying the motions and soon he felt immediate relief. He felt Harry smile into the kiss, as his whole body seemed to calm down. He felt like he sunk backwards as Harry smiled down at him kissing his tears away. Harry pulled up his hand covered in sticky white, Sirius’s face flushed embarrassed. Harry laughed banishing the mess, cleaning them both. He carefully tucked Sirius away and fixed his pants giving him a slow kiss.

“You look tired.” Harry whispered, “I can make the chair a couch.”

“Yes please.” Sirius mumbled, with a wave of his wand Sirius was a lot more comfortable. Harry stood tossing the fluffy blanket over his lower body, as Sirius snuggled into a pillow emotionally and physically exhausted. He glanced at Harry seeing the bulge in his pants he felt guilty and tried to reach for him.

“Sirius, this was about you.” Harry said holding his hand instead of letting him grab him. “I just wanted you to be happy. I lov- I really, really care about you.”

“Harry I-”

“Dumbledore’s Army time!” Ron yelled running into the room making them spring apart. Hermione cocked a brow at them a knowing smirk on her face, as Ron started stretching. “Can’t wait! Mock duels today, right mate?”

“Y-yeah! Mock duels…” Harry stuttered awkwardly, walking to join them as more people entered. Spike flew down out of the way curling up on Sirius’s head making him hiss as little claws tugged his hair. Somehow, and everyone was rather surprised by this, Sirius fell asleep through the D.A. lesson with a swooping evil on his head guarding him.

**********

An arm wrapped around his pulling him away from the direction he was walking he glanced over seeing Hermione. She smiled a little mischievously at him as she tugged him along with her. She brought him right over to a bay window seat sitting them both down a little hidden from the world.

“Alright Sirius. Spill.” She said putting her hands in her lap.

“Hermione-”

“Don’t try to lie to me.” She said smiling, “You’re a horrid liar. You once told me Professor Snape didn’t like my long essays, stating you’d get a chocolate frog if I wrote smaller. Then asked what deny meant before then denying he did such a thing.”

“Well I was a little kid.”

“Yes, very cute but terrible liar.” She said as they both turned sitting picnic style to face each other. “Now tell me.”

“Hermione you have to keep it a secret but… Harry and I are dating.” Sirius said looking down blushing.

“I knew it!” She cried, “Tell me everything. Who asked who?”

“He asked me.” He said slowly telling her things and answering her questions. “Please Hermione don’t tell anyone.”

“I won’t, I won’t.” She said hugging him tight. “Oh Sirius I’m so happy for you.”

“3ft apart.” A shrill voice said, as he and Hermione where unceremoniously separated each sliding across the bench. He looked up seeing Umbridge staring at them making a tsking noise.

**********

Sirius kicked his feet as he sat on the desk watching Severus and Harry work on his occlumency skills. He could tell they were both getting frustrated. Sirius tapped his chin in thought, “Maybe you guys should take a break.”

“Yes- I second that.” Harry said slouching into his chair relieved.

“The Dark Lord doesn’t take breaks and neither should you.” Severus said lifting his wand.

“Please Severus.” Sirius said using his sweetest voice, the one he knew made Severus cave to buy him sweets. “We could have Dipsey bring us drinks and the cookies I made earlier.”

“I know you only brought him to try to manipulate your way out of work.” Severus said glaring at Harry. “Stop being lazy Potter.”

“I’m not being lazy!” Harry snapped.

“You are.” Severus growled, “James and Lily would have been able to do this by now. They would have actually tried. You’re going to get people killed!”

“I am trying!” Harry yelled. “You’re going through my private memories!”

“Nothing is private to the Dark Lord!” Severus yelled.

Sirius shifted uncomfortably, he didn’t like this. He wanted them to stop, but they were yelling at each other at this point. “Maybe we should-”

“Legillancey!” Severus shouted, as Harry yanked his wand free.

“Stop!” Sirius yelled at them only to feel like he got bowled over, like he was falling very rapidly backwards. He tried to blink his eyes clear, he was being held and he was staring at his mother. This was familiar.

“I don’t care what you do with him, I just want him alive and breathing.” She snapped, as a strong hand patted his back. “Squib do whatever John Barrick tells you. I’ll be back in a week or so.”

Sirius blinked, as his voice answered ‘yes Madam’ on auto pilot. She huffed as they disappeared into the floo. Barrick was patting his hair calling him ‘little one’ as he carried him to the bedroom. He knew this memory it was after he was taken from Regulus. This was a bad memory, one of the worst ones. This was the first time _it_ happened. He wanted to scream, to fight and kick but his other self didn’t. He didn’t know what was about to happen to him.

Barrick laid him on the bed yanking Sirius clothes off quickly before pulling down his own pants. His other self seemed to wake up now screaming and flailing as Barrick climbed on top of him forcing his legs apart. “Shh little one, don’t fight me that’s bad. You’re being a very bad squib.”

He wanted to close his eyes, he wanted to scream or wake up from this nightmare but he couldn’t. He couldn’t wake up. He couldn’t feel it physically but he remembered the pain and humiliation. Barrick was having his way with him, other Sirius was begging threw tears for him to stop. He wouldn’t. Barrick kept his face close to his telling him how he was a bad squib and needed to behave. Sirius felt himself get yanked quickly upwards like he was being dragged through water. He blinked rapidly staring into a face inches from his. He screamed throwing his hands up shoving them with full force. Severus cursed as he stumbled backwards.

“Sirius I’m so sorry!” Harry cried.

“I’m not a bad squib! I’m not a bad squib! I’m-”

“What did you do Potter!?” Severus snapped, glaring at Harry. He reached out gently taking Sirius’s hands as he dissolved into tears on the verge of a panic attack.

“I- I went into his mind sir. I redirected your spell and-” Harry swallowed hard. “Sirius I’m so sorry!”

“Shut up Potter.” Severus hissed as he rubbed circles with his thumbs into Sirius hands. “It’s ok Sirius. I’m here. Whatever you saw can’t hurt you anymore. Try to breath.”

Harry came up gingerly touching his back, “I’m sorry Sirius. I’m here. You’ll be alright.”

Sirius blinked up at them, Severus was giving Harry both a look of pure annoyance and like he was almost impressed. While Harry pointedly wouldn’t look at Severus focusing instead on Sirius. They disliked each other but they came together for him. They both cared about him that much he thought slowly as he cried.

“I’m going to get him a calming draught. That was probably very jarring.” Severus said moving to his potions cabinet, he stuck the potion in Sirius’s hand.

“Sirius, I’m so sorry.” Harry said, as Sirius drank with shaking hands. “I didn’t mean too. I- tried to get out but couldn’t Snape had to-”

“It’s ok.” Sirius gasped taking a deep breath. “I know you didn’t mean too... That was after Reggie was taken away, it was the first time he took me.”

Severus sighed deeply as Harry hugged him gently stroking his back. “Sirius. It wasn’t your fault.”

“Yes it was... I deserved it...” Sirius said sadly feeling Harry stiffen.

“Sirius,” Severus said moving Harry aside, Harry scrambled to still keep Sirius’s hand in his. Severus gently rested his hand on his shoulder crouching to get eye contact. “It wasn’t your fault. You didn’t deserve it. He was a bad not you. You’re safe. I will always be here.”

Sirius paused at this, his guardians, Regulus and Harry had told him this before. He looked at Severus seeing his determination then to Harry seeing his quiet acceptance. He felt a thumb massaging his burn scar, he glanced down at his boyfriends hand in his as Severus rubbed his shoulder. He felt a smile tug at his lips, he felt cared for.

**********

He was currently in the library with Hermione and Ron as they did homework. Her a potions essay him and Ron a mind numbing history paper. Ginny came in sitting across from them dropping a few heavy books making the table shake. “Hi, where’s Harry?”

“Detention with Umbitch.” Ron said Ginny nodded.

“He’s so brave, the way he’s flat out defying her.” Ginny said sighing dreamily as she removed her own potions homework. They worked in silence for a while Sirius folded his parchment leaning over to put away his essay.

“Oh come on, you’re done already?” Ron groaned, “Ugh- this essay is horrid.”

“It’s not so bad. Oh Ginny- that’s not right.” Sirius said seeing her essay. “Polyjuice needs _shredded_ boomslang skin not diced. I can help you if you want, I’m done my work.”

“I’d be done my work too if I only had three classes.” She grumbled looking at him pointedly. “ _Easy like you_.” Sirius stared at her a moment paling as she sent him a cocky smile. “Right Ron wouldn’t it be easy having three classes?”

“Probably... Can you help me mate?” Ron said scooting his chair closer to him. “This essay is dreadful.”

Sirius glanced at Ginny before leaning in helping Ron. They worked in relative silence again until Harry showed up, looking upset. He grabbed a chair shoving it next to Sirius with Ginny on his other side. He breathed deeply leaning forward on the table. Sirius reached down producing a healing slave from his bag he took his hand looking at the raw words ‘I will not tell lies’. He hummed rubbing the slave on the cuts as Harry sighed in relief looking at him.

“Thanks Siri.” He said. “You guys finish your homework?”

“Trying to.” Hermione mumbled deep in concentration.

“Almost,” Ginny said. “Sirius is helping Ron with his history essay. Meanwhile I’m struggling with potions.”

“I’m bollucks at potions. If you need help ask Sirius, Snape teaches him his potions secrets I swear.” Harry said pulling his hand away from Sirius to work on some transfiguration. He smirked turning back to helping Ron, he felt Harry’s leg press against his. They went back to the silence and skittering of quills.

At long last Ginny sat up yawning, “We should head back. It’ll be curfew soon.”

“Yeah, good idea.” Harry said ruffling his hair in thought. “I’m not getting anywhere with this anyway.”

“Oh Harry your hair looks so nice ruffled like that.” Ginny said smiling coyly brushing a finger few some strands.

Sirius stiffened while Harry looked at her grinning. “Thanks Ginny. Come on Sirius I’ll walk you back.”

“Harry it’ll be curfew soon.” Ginny said, “Do you have time to walk all the way to the dungeons and back?”

“I know short cuts.” Harry said dismissively. The second they were away from the group Harry took his hand smiling at him Sirius looked away turning pink. “You’re so cute.”

“I’m not cute.”

“Yes you are, you’re little and cute.”

“I’m not little!”

“Fine. You’re short and cute.” Harry said using their joined hands to pull him in for a kiss making him blush harder. “Yeah very cute.”

**********

He was annoyed with Ginny but he shrugged her off instead he focused on how going to the room of requiment early had become his and Harry’s thing. It often ended with him on Harry’s lap, kissing passionately and enjoying some heavy petting. He had stopped shaking when things got physical, so there was that. He wanted to do more for Harry, he felt terrible that Harry was always the one initiating the more intimate things.

He was currently on Harry’s lap knees on either side of him feeling hands roaming his back. Sirius pulled away stopping their kiss, “How much time do we have?”

Harry did a quick tempis charm, “A little more than ten minutes.”

“Perfect.” Sirius said sliding backwards off Harry to the floor. He landed between his knees nervously, he reached out undoing his pants.

“Sirius you don’t have to-”

“Please Harry before I lose my nerve.” Sirius asked pleadingly. “I want you to- enjoy it.”

Harry nodded watching him. Sirius swallowed hard breathing deeply he freed Harry’s already erect member from his boxers. He didn’t know why he was so nervous, he’d been forced to do stuff like this before. He leaned in grabbing the base, Harry sighed happily. Sirius got up on his knees letting it touch his lips a pearl of precum smearing on them. He opened his mouth slowly lowering his head, sliding his tongue along the shaft as he did.

“Sirius…” Harry moaned leaning back head resting on the chair. Sirius looked up eyes meeting Harry’s as he started to bob, moving his hand in motion. Harry gasped hands reaching out like he was going to grab Sirius’s hair, Sirius flinched away pulling Harry with the motion. Harry’s hands landed on his shoulders instead, breathing heavy.

Sirius pulled back a little trying to get air, he licked the slit getting more of the salty precum on his tongue. He heard Harry whispering praise as he twisted his tongue around the head in lazy circles. Sirius smirked, if Harry liked that he could only imagine his next reaction. He opened his mouth pressed down his tongue and deep throated him.

“Sirius!” Harry cried jerking his hips up in pleasure. Sirius chuckled around his member at the pleased sounds Harry was making. Harry moaned. “Don’t stop! Don’t stop!”

Sirius happily obliged sliding him up and down his throat earning the best sounds from Harry. He held his boyfriend’s knee for support as he moved. Vaguely he realized not once had he trembled during this, nor did he try to disassociate himself. He looked up meeting Harry’s eyes the teen squeezed his shoulders as he went back to the head shallower motions at a quicker pace.

“Sirius I’m gonna-” Harry started only to cut himself off as Sirius gave him a hard suck hollowing his cheeks. Harry moaned releasing into his mouth, he started swallowing the moment he tasted the saltiness maintaining eye contact. Harry panted watching him, “Oh… Wow… oh wow… Sirius…”

Once he was sure Harry was done, he licked the softening member clean of any remaining fluids before tucking him away. He had always been told he cleaned up nicely. He sat back a little unsure what to do normally he’d be sent away, or locked up. Harry tapped him, signaling him back to his lap. He crawled up happily to the exhausted teen, Harry wrapped his arms around him kissing his cheek before kissing him on the lips.

“How am I supposed to teach a class after that?” Harry panted as Sirius settled into his lap.

“Sorry…” Sirius said awkwardly.

“No- no. That was amazing!” Harry said, pushing his face into Sirius’s neck. “I just need to breathe a little before I can teach patronus charms that’s all.”

“But Harry they’ll be here soon.” Sirius said as Harry rubbed his back muttering a cleaning spell.

“Alright, alight.” Harry moaned standing, Sirius was incredibly alarmed that Harry was strong enough to pick him up though it lasted seconds at best. Sirius slid into the chair pleased with himself when Harry pulled out a chocolate frog. “Here, this will probably get the taste out of your mouth.”

“Oh I’m used to it but I won’t pass up free chocolate.” Sirius said innocently. He missed the upset expression on Harry’s face as he took the frog smiling.

“Sirius,” Harry started making the shorter teen look up curious soft smile on his face. “Never mind, it’s not important. You’re amazing. Truly amazing. I- I love- I love seeing you smile.”

“Oh. Thanks Harry.” Sirius said a little confused by him. He gave whistle calling Spike down as the class started to arrive.

Sirius had been quiet content watching the patronus charms, they were all very beautiful. It was magic like this that made him feel good and safe. A stag patronus walked up to him, it stomped its foot and shook it’s head. He reached for it only to have it lean in quickly rubbing his nose against him almost like a lick. He chuckled sadly, a memory of seeing James as Prongs the first time being pulled to the front of his head. The room was so happy and full of joy till the glass wall started reverberating a thumping noise. Slowly all the patronus’s stopped, he reached up checking Spike was still cocooned on his ear. Harry walked to the front as Umbridge and her little minions broke through giving a command to ‘get them’.

Everything was a blur at that point, a prefect had Harry and Ron, Malfoy snatched Hermione. He was grabbed roughly by Crabbe as the rest of the students were rounded up. Crabbe squeezed his arm tightly trying to bruise him as he stood way to close behind Sirius’s back. He hated Crabbe, he and Goyle often would help Malfoy torment him when he was small holding him down and hurting him. He scrunched up his face leaning away upset as Crabbe smirked looking him over in a way that made his skin crawl. He saw Mr. Filch grab a student when he paused seeing Sirius’s face in the rough hands of Crabbe, Filch walked over switching students with Crabbe. He held Sirius’s arm a lot gentler as he led him after the rest of the students. Sirius thanked Merlin for Filch.

Sirius felt like if he blinked he would have missed something, Umbridge had ministry officials and aurors in the Headmaster’s office. Dumbledore took the fall for Dumbledore’s Army and fled Hogwarts. Umbridge was promoted to the new Headmistress and all the students but him where carted off to her detention. He stood there swallowing hard, Filch still holding his arm as she breathed heavily through her nose at him.

“Well.” She said her tone tight. “You’re expelled. I want you out of Hogwarts immediately.”

Sirius’s eyes widened, “I- I live here with my guardians.”

“Yes well Mr. Lupin will be leaving too. Along with Trelawney” She looked at the aurors expectantly. “I consider them all trespassing. Remove them at once.”

“Madam Umbridge- I mean Headmistress Umbridge.” Filch said cautiously eyeing her up, “Perhaps this one could stay. Mrs. Norris and I could use the help.”

“No.” She said sternly, “He was part of Dumbledore’s plan somehow I just know it.”

“Alright Headmistress, I’ll get rid of him.” Filch said pulling him out of the room and down the hall. “Come on, we’ll go to Professor Snape’s quarters he’ll take you home.”

“Thanks…” Sirius muttered softly. “So much for my short time as a student…”

“You made it farther than any squib.” Filch said purposely looking away. Sirius waited to see if he would say more but realized that was as good a compliment as he would get.

When they got to the dungeons Remus wrapped him in a hug telling him it would be ok. Begrudgingly he packed his stuff, he paused uncovering Prongs Jr. from where he had hidden him, he hummed carefully placing him in his bag. Finally packed he came out to greet Remus and the auror that was to escort them away.

“Where’s Severus?” He asked.

“Right here love.” Severus said wrapping him in the biggest hug. He hugged him back trying not to cry as Severus smoothed his hair. “I’ll miss you both so much.”

“I’ll miss you too.” Sirius said pulling away. He looked away as the two men kissed goodbye, he glanced at the auror, Shaklebolt he was the one Sirius talked to about Markus. He turned away, lot of help that did him.

“Come on, it’s time to go.” Shaklebolt said reaching out to herd Sirius but Remus moved quickly ushering Sirius himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Get it boys. ;3  
> Regulus you amuse me.
> 
> Please let me know what you think. <3


	22. Chapter 22

Remus felt terrible for Sirius, they had moved back to their house. Regulus was with them yet Sirius had basically not left their home, he stress baked them out of ingredients and he read books like his life depended on it. Sure they could sometimes get him to engage with them but mostly he would throw himself on one of them and just keep reading or have Spike chase them out of the kitchen. Remus sighed watching Regulus flop onto the couch staring at Sirius who was sat in the corner quietly reading an ancient runes book.

“What are you reading?” Regulus asked trying to engage him, Sirius just lifted the book a little higher. “Ah ancient runes. That was my best class you know.” Sirius nodded turning the page. “My teacher was a rather mean man. But at least he was better than our potions instructor Professor Slughorn. Terrible teacher always wanted me to go to his slug club parties. Dreadful right Remus?”

“Yes, I was only ever invited as Severus’s date though.” Remus said, he glanced at Sirius he was completely ignoring them. “Err… Remember the time James enchanted Slughorn’s chalk to run away from him? That was funny.”

“Oh yeah!” Regulus said looking at Sirius, he only pursed his lips flipping another page. “Severus used to write all over his potions books, drove old Slughorn crazy.”

“That’s nice.” Sirius said as if to pacify them as he leaned into his book.

Remus looked at Regulus who shrugged motioning for them to try again. Remus cleared his throat, “So what did you and Harry get up to in the room of requirements?”

Sirius looked up quick, blush spreading across his face. “N-nothing!”

Remus raised his eyebrows at this, clearly not ‘nothing’ went on. He looked at Regulus as the other man smirked, “Relax Siri, we wanted to know about what Harry was teaching. Not what you two do behind closed doors.”

Sirius scoffed at this, “We worked on how I could fight a wizard. And he taught them stuff- I didn’t pay that much attention it’s not like I could do it. I did like watching the patronus charms though. Harry’s is a stag like James.”

“That must have been delightful.” Remus said softly.

“It was till Madam Umbridge came and ruined it.” Sirius said going back to his book.

“Sirius do you want to go into town?” Regulus asked quickly desperate not to let him fall back into his book coma. “Come on, I’ve been locked in long enough and now you’ve been locked in too. Right Remus lets go out?”

“That sounds wonderful.” Remus agreed, fresh air might shake Sirius’s depressed funk. The teen looked at them critically before nodding agreement placing his book down standing. Remus smiled, “Regulus let me get your collar and leash.”

“That sounds kinky.” Regulus said making them all pause.

“Reggie!” Sirius snapped horrified. “That’s gross what’s wrong with you!?”

Regulus burst out laughing scooping Sirius lifting his toes off the ground spinning him. Remus shook his head chuckling as Sirius was smothered in Regulus’s arms. “Alright children time to go.”

Barking sounded as Regulus now in dog form bounded to him. He snapped everything in place and took Sirius’s hand to apparate. Shopping really did wake them all up, he was a little worried watching Sirius buy an armful of books but at least he was out. They even visited Fred and George who after quitting school were setting up their new shop.

“Come on, come on.” Fred said pulling Sirius away as George said, “Let us give you some test products.”

Fred and George immediately went to work stacking things into a very confused Sirius’s arms. Fred smirked, “You’ve heard of dungbombs well here’s some demon dung.”

“Edible Dark Marks, very good no tricks just tasty.” George said, “And these candies are called U-no-poo, don’t eat them.”

“Peruvian Instant Darkness Powder good for a quick getaway.” Fred said sticking it in Sirius’s pocket clicking his tongue at him with a wink.

Remus chuckled watching them stack more things into his arms, he looked at Snuffles. “Should we rescue him?” Snuffles shook his head, tail wagging. “You’re mean.”

After Remus shrunk everything for Sirius they decided that they’d go to an apothecary and get Severus some new ingredients. The shop keep gave Snuffles a hard stare, “No dogs allowed.”

“Oh sir I’m so sorry, he’s an actually a service animal.” Remus said smiling politely as Sirius laid a hand on Snuffles head.

The man crossed his arms sighing deeply, “Fine, please be careful. Don’t let him eat or break anything.”

“Don’t worry.” Remus said waving him off, together he stood with Sirius as they loaded up on different ingredients. Getting Severus ingredients reminded Remus that his pup was out of baking supplies. So after the apothecary they went food shopping.

They ended the day with dinner and the promise of ice-cream. The poor waitress was very confused setting chicken fingers on the ground in front of Snuffles. Sirius looked down at him amused, before looking at Remus. “Can I ask you something?”

“Of course.” Remus said smiling up from his burger.

“Why am I so short?” Sirius said handing Snuffles some of his fries.

“You aren’t really short.” Remus said, “Maybe a bit small for your age. But Sirius you had been stunted for years. And though Severus has a cure for you I suppose there where bound to be some side effects.”

“Ok that’s another thing will I be taking that potion for the rest of my life?” Sirius asked, Snuffles looked up at this.

“Afraid so love.” Remus said, “Don’t worry. I’m sure Severus will teach you how to make it.”

“What happens if I don’t take it? Will I just not age?” Sirius asked nibbling his food.

“Normally you would take the potion until you reached your actual age but we never plan to do that to you. Unless you want to?” Remus asked seeing Sirius shake his head ‘no’. “In that case I’m sorry but I have no idea. For all we know after enough time you could revert back to five.”

“No!” Sirius gasped practically choking. Snuffles rested his head quickly on his thigh trying to help calm him. Remus ignored the stares of the fellow dinners seeing the beginning of a possible panic on his pups face. He reached out taking his hands rubbing calming circles on them.

“It’s ok. Breathe. We’re here.”

“I’m fine- I’m fine.” Sirius said, “I just can’t do that again.”

“It’s alright love. We’re here for you. You’ll be ok.” Remus said smiling gently. “Come on let me pay and we’ll get some chocolate ice cream.” Sirius nodded as Snuffles barked excited, “You can have vanilla Snuffles chocolate could kill you.”

********

Remus yawned it was rather late, Sirius had disappeared upstairs hours ago and Regulus was- somewhere. He stretched popping his back, he closed his book figuring it best to go to bed. He was halfway to his room when he heard a strangled yell. He sighed redirecting himself, he cracked open Sirius’s door. He’d clearly fallen asleep reading as a book laid face down on his chest. His pup’s face was scrunched up as he thrashed about in his bed, making noises of distress.

Remus walked up slowly sitting with him, he ran a hand over his forehead while removing the book from his chest. He looked at him sadly. He knew waking him up was worst then letting him sleep through it, he and Severus found that out the first time when he was little. Sirius had clawed at them desperate to save himself and then been distraught for hours after. Remus stroked his hair, pinning the blankets down with a wand wave to keep him from moving too much least he hurt himself from thrashing.

“Sirius you’re ok. I’m here. Remus is here.” He said quietly, as his pups sleeping eyes teared up. Sirius jerked about letting out a shriek trying blindly to protect his nether region. Remus’s heart broke, he grabbed one of his flailing hands rubbing gentle circles on it. “It’s not real. You’re safe at home. I’m here.”

He wasn’t sure if Sirius could hear him, but he liked to believe he did as he said gentle things to him. Slowly Sirius calmed down and was back to sleeping soundly like nothing had happened. Remus finally breathed in relief, he smiled at his relaxed face. Carefully Remus brushed his pups tears away before cleaning his own face. He sat for a second longer rubbing his hand, when he was sure he wasn’t going to start up again he leaned forward kissing his head.

“Goodnight Padfoot. I love you.” He said gently, he stood fixing his covers tucking him in. He stayed there staring at him a little longer just checking on him, he told himself before he backed out carefully shutting the door part way.

“You’re good for him.” Regulus said making him jump. He whirled around seeing Regulus leaning on the wall watching him. “You know Remus my whole life I feared for my brother. I kept thinking that no one would care for him or love him the way I do. Then James loved him. He helped me rescue him from our horrid parents, he ‘raised’ him for a year while I was in Hogwarts.” Regulus tilted his head looking into the room then back to Remus continuing. “Then you and Severus rescued him and raised him. And I don’t question if you two love him. I know it.”

“Regulus?” Remus asked watching his friends dark eyes as he smiled soft almost longingly.

“James, you and Severus… Sirius has had some pretty great dads huh?” Regulus said turning to him. Remus felt his heart stutter at this, he smiled nodding eagerly his eyes starting to water. Regulus nodded back, “Night Moony.”

“Regulus.” He stumbled out making him pause in the door. “He has a really great brother.”

********

Sirius sat book in his lap, Edible Dark Mark between his teeth, they were rather chewy but he really liked them. He reached up holding out one to Regulus who he was currently using as a leg rest.

“I’m starting to think you only give me the orange ones.” Regulus said taking it out of his hand anyway.

“I don’t like orange.” Sirius said shrugging.

“Mean Siri. You’re supposed to be nice to your younger brother.” Regulus said throwing a dramatic hand up to his head, Sirius gave him a side eyed look.

“Sorry Reggie I’ll start giving you the cherry ones too.” He said earning a laugh. “Hey Reggie, how similar do you think our blood is?”

“Well we are brothers so pretty similar.”

“But I’m a squib.”

“Yes but that shouldn’t matter. Wait why?” Regulus asked suspicious.

Sirius bit his lip spinning his book to show him. “It says here sometimes siblings can activate each other’s runes, if they’re made with blood. So I was kind of thinking that maybe- Never mind it’s stupid.”

He slammed the book shut standing up, Regulus followed him standing. He tried to walk away but Regulus spun him, “You wanted to see if you could use a rune I make?”

“I know it’s stupid. I’m a squib.” Sirius said flapping his arms once dejected. “I just thought it might… I don’t know- maybe it would work.”

Sirius got quiet, he knew it was stupid he knew it wouldn’t work but for a fleeting moment he wondered. Regulus shrugged summoning a parchment and quill, he drew out a small basic rune to make light before pricking his finger letting blood drop to it. Sirius stared at him wide eyed he opened his mouth but Regulus pulled him over.

“Just press your palm flat to it to activate it.” Regulus said standing behind him arms crossed.

Sirius swallowed hard, he placed down the book, turning his attention to the rune. He rubbed his hands together reaching out to touch the paper. He stopped pulling his hand back like it would burn him. He almost didn’t want to touch it that way he could be in limbo of not ever knowing.

He glanced at Regulus almost embarrassed he asked him to do this. Regulus gave him an encouraging smile waiting. He sighed reaching out slowly, he let his fingertips touch first before laying his whole hand down. He pressed his palm flat and nothing happened. He sighed disappointed he should have known.

He started to move his hand when Regulus’s landed on top of his. Sirius felt tingles of something running through his hand, it almost felt electric in nature. Regulus pushed their hands down together activating the rune though him. The rune lit up glowing beautiful colors and making his hand warm.

“It’s warm! Reggie wow.” Sirius said looking at his brother proud of him. Regulus smiled softly back as they enjoyed watching the colors glow.

********

Sirius was holding Spike in his hands making what Regulus called ‘kissy face’ at the swooping evil. He ignored the teasing telling Spike how handsome and cute he was. The swooping evil seemed to lavish in the attention, making preening noises and moving his head about.

He jumped when the silvery wolf patronus tore into the room stopping in front of Remus. Severus voice coming out of the charm, “Where is Regulus? Potter delivered a cryptic message that the Dark Lord has Regulus in the Department of Mysteries. Send word back right away.”

The trio looked up alarmed as the patronus disappeared. Regulus stood giving his wand a wave summoning his dog patronus. “I’m here. I’m fine. Keep Harry away from there Voldemort is clearly setting a trap. We’re going to summon Dumbledore and take care of it. Tell him we’re safe.”

They watched the patronus bound away disappearing into a silvery stream. Regulus and Remus shared a look each standing setting to work. Remus summoned his own patronus calling Dumbledore while Regulus started calling Order members with the floo. Sirius swallowed hard reattaching Spike to his ear, he jogged up the stairs grabbing his expanding bag of battle and healing potions from his room as an afterthought he grabbed Fred’s Peruvian Instant Darkness Powder just in case before joining them again.

When he walked in Shaklebolt and Tonks where in the room while Moody was stepping through the floo. Moody stamped his staff growling to himself. “Going into a Merlin damn battle with bloody Death Eaters. Remember, constant vigilance!”

“Remus we should stick together.” Tonks said giving him a flirty smile, Sirius scoffed.

“Sirius,” Shaklebolt said in greeting, “Regulus.”

“Good everyone’s here.” Dumbledore said walking out of the floo with his phoenix, Fawkes. “We should discuss a battle plan. We know he was trying to lure in Harry and we know where he is we have the element of surprise. Luckily Severus can give Harry the message that Regulus is safe and keep him protected at school.”

Sirius sat legs crossed listening to them plan. Regulus looked egger hands gripping the table tight, “If Pettigrew is there we need to capture him to clear my name.”

“Indeed,” Dumbledore said, “You will all handle the Death Eaters leave Tom to me. Now then I think-”

All heads sprung up surprised as a silvery wolf bound in front of Remus. Severus’s voice once again came through, “Potter is missing. I couldn’t find him to give him the message, he and a handful of students are gone! I believe he’s going to fall right into the Dark Lord’s trap.”

Sirius started shaking as the push was immediate amongst the group. Regulus started yelling, “Let’s go! We need to go now!”

There was a surge as they all headed outside Sirius ran grabbing Regulus’s hand pausing him. “Take me!”

“What Sirius no, you need to stay here.” Regulus said firmly getting Remus’s attention.

“The last time you left me behind I lost you for twelve years!” Sirius said, making Regulus close his eyes sadly. “I want to fight. Harry and I have been practicing. I can help. I don’t want to be sidelined anymore. I can help.”

“Sirius…” Regulus said before nodded. “I swear to Merlin, you better stay close to Remus.”

“You can’t be serious!” Remus cried.

“No he’s Sirius. Moony, I trust him. Watch him for me.” Regulus said grabbing them both, Sirius stomach twisted as they landed hard. Regulus whirled on Sirius casting his strongest protection charm, Remus did the same.

“Stay with me.” Remus said grabbing his hand as they entered giving him a look that clearly said don’t argue with me. Remus pulled him in tight turning them to what Sirius would describe as white light. It was a weird rush as they shot through the department, they landed roughly, crouching looking down a pit where Harry and his friends where surrounded by Death Eaters.

“I’m going to distract them. Then you guys save the kids. Moony, Sirius you two provide cover from up here.” Regulus said. He walked up pulling Sirius into a quick hug, he looked him in the eye smirking. “I love you Sirius. I’m so freaking proud of you big brother.” With that he jumped down disappearing into light, landing behind Lucius Malfoy.

“Get away from my godson.” He said before he punched him in the face.

One by one Order members dropped down into light attacking Death Eaters. Remus started to reach for him but Sirius whistled Spike uncurled and shot from him, savaging a Death Eater.

“Don’t eat his brain it’s not good for you!” He yelled down whacking the ground as the man screamed a flailed, Spike seemed to understand knocking him out instead.

“Well, I didn’t expect that.” Remus said, unsheathing his wand firing curses down below. “Good to know you and Harry aren’t just sucking face all day.”

“Merlin I hate you.” Sirius smirked, whistling to redirect Spike back to him. He removed three potions from his bag, “Watch this.”

He chucked them down one by one causing sticky explosions ensnaring a Death Eater. Remus snorted, incapacitating a second Death Eater. “You’re a sneaky one. Hold your fire.”

Sirius looked up watching Regulus disarm Lucius and blast him with a stupefy, the battle over they had won. His brother looked up him proud before turning to Harry happily as he walked in front of a stone arch. He felt Remus tapping him signaling him to stand taking his hand.

“Avada Kedavra!” Bellatrix screamed the green curse flew out hitting Regulus square in the chest.

Sirius’s heart stopped as Regulus fell backwards slowly threw the archway of the veil and disappeared. He only heard his labored breathing, staring were his brother had been everything was moving in slow motion. He saw Harry screaming and the pull of Remus bringing them down to him but he felt frozen not totally focused. Remus grabbed Harry pulling him away as he reached for the veil, Sirius sunk to his knees. Hermione’s arms wrapped around him, hugging him tightly from behind, vaguely he heard her talking to him it sounded muddled. Harry ran away as Sirius stared at the veil.

“Regulus…” He blinked back tears quietly a part of him died.

********

Sirius traced his fingers along the stone walls of Hogwarts as he climbed the astronomy tower, they had insisted all the children go to the school nurse. Remus brought him too but he snuck out the second his back was turned. He sighed quietly, reaching the top, the wooden floor creaked as he walked over it. He stood at one of the large gapping windows feeling the light summer breeze tickle his hair across his face.

He grabbed either side of the stone pulling himself to stand on the sill. He held it tight leaning out looking at the long drop below. He felt unattached to his body, like his mind had already plummeted. His hands shook, his eyes prickled with tears, he looked up at the night sky taking a shaky breath. One step, he thought mouth quivering. Just one step. He let his head drop, eyes looking down.

It should have been him who died. Maybe in some other world he did and in a way he felt like he had died when Regulus disappeared. Regulus gave up everything for him, he spent his whole life trying to protect Sirius. He had done everything to save him years ago. He had been disowned, run away from home, rescued him from a man who would later become his rapist.

Sirius laughed bitterly, Regulus had come back to save Harry but he had stayed for both of them. He put Regulus through so much pain, he closed his eyes. How many curses did he take instead of Sirius, he had seen his brothers back it was as bad his. He glanced out over the forbidden forest, Regulus had spent days wandering that forest looking for him. Regulus never gave up on him, not in the forest, not at home, not ever. He smiled bitterly, his brother even believed he could fight Death Eaters.

He breathed deeply he couldn’t waste the life Regulus had worked so hard to protect. He tried to pull back, to climb back into the tower but his hands and feet were stuck. He sighed wondering how long he’d actually been stuck for. He looked over his shoulder seeing Severus watching him while Remus cried silently.

“I’m not going to jump.” He said bitterly, “Regulus would have wanted me to live.”

“Forgive us for not believing you.” Severus said walking up behind him, he wrapped his arm around his middle pulling him back as he released the spell. Sirius was spun and pulled into their arms, he stood there rather numbly letting them hug him.

“How long were you there?”

“The whole time love. We never would have let you fall.” Remus said through tears, Sirius reached up holding them back crying deeply as they sunk to the floor.

“I’m so sorry Sirius. But you aren’t alone right now.” Severus said voice strained. “It’s ok, to not be ok. We love you.”

Remus nodded agreement, “Sirius, we’ll always be here for you. We love you so much.”

He cried brokenly his body shuddering as Severus rubbed circles on his back and Remus ran a hand through his hair. They loved him? They really loved him? Nobody besides Regulus had ever said they loved him before and he thought of throwing himself from a tower without thinking of them at all. He pulled back looking at them, their eyes red and faces so full of fear and worry. He’d scared them. They were scared for him.

“I love you too! I’m sorry I scared you dads!” Sirius cried bitterly not noticing his word choice, he was hugged tighter. He didn’t feel like he had to ask them to stay, or to not leave him, he just knew they would be there now. Sirius’s heart still hurt, but he felt like in time he would be ok.

********

Remus did not want to have this conversation. He didn’t want to even consider it but the unfortunate truth was Regulus Black was dead and now Dumbledore was dying cursed by a horcrux. Severus told him everything and now they were facing the horrible choice they feared since the Dark Lords return.

“I need to do this Remus.” Severus said holding his hand as he whispered. “And you need to go with him.”

“No- no.” Remus said shaking his head.

“We can’t abandon him.” Severus argued looking at him sadly. “Dumbledore asked me to kill him. They’ll turn on me. You could be fine.”

“No- no- I love you I won’t leave you.” Remus said holding his hand tighter, “You don’t have to do this alone.”

“Remus-”

“Do you really think they’ll believe me innocent anyways?”

“If you have Sirius, then yes.” Severus said blinking slowly averting his eyes. “He can’t stay with me Remus, you know what they’ll do to him.”

“Severus I-”

“Let me go Remus. I love you and when the war is over we’ll find each other again.”

“This can’t be the only way. I’ll talk to Molly. I’ll talk to-”

“Remus you can’t tell anyone.”

“I think Sirius deserves to know.” Remus said firmly. “He should have a say in this.”

“I agree.” Severus said, “We should tell him more in the school year, once- this settles. On his birthday maybe when he’s fully an adult. He-”

He cut himself off hearing a thump from upstairs, they shared a look going to check on their pup. Finding Sirius had thrown himself from bed tangled in his blankets. He looked around dizzy and confused, breathing like he had run a marathon. Remus sighed, night terrors again. They walked up together as Sirius struggled to collect himself blinking rapidly.

“I’m sorry I woke you up.” He muttered kicking trying to free himself, Remus reached down helping him.

“It’s fine, we were up talking anyway.” Severus said softly. “Want to sleep with us? I’ll transfigure you a bed.”

“Yes please.” Sirius said smiling. Remus breathed deeply following them out holding Spike’s cage. Sirius had the night terror but it was Severus that needed the comfort.

********

Sirius held tight to Remus and Spike as they apparated to Diagon Alley, he pulled away looking around for his friends but Remus held him close. The Alley was basically deserted half the shops closed down. The rather large Weasley Wizarding Weeze was the only place that looked alive and open. They went there immediately he saw Hermione and Ginny by the love potions, he started to walk away when Remus pulled him back.

“Hagrid and I will be around, keeping an eye on you kids.” Remus said, Sirius nodded wanting to go when Remus glanced at his boots checking the tracking charm on them. He looked at him mournfully but Remus just smiled. “Can never be too careful.”

Sirius wanted to be annoyed but he was almost more flattered to be reminded he was cared for so much. He waved him off coming up behind Ginny and Hermione as the brunette spoke holding up a love potion. “I can’t believe Fred and George are making these.”

“I think it’s fun. Besides it doesn’t last long at all.” Ginny laughed, “Maybe I’ll give one to Harry and get a kiss.”

“Wouldn’t that be considered forcing yourself on him?” Sirius asked gaining their attention.

“Like you don’t?” She said leveling him with a look. “You hang on him all the time. You aren’t little and cute anymore it’s just weird now.”

She pushed past him bumping his shoulder, Hermione rolled her eyes. “Ignore her. She has a crush on Harry and is just jealous of how much time you spend together. She doesn’t know your dating.”

Sirius shrugged Hermione chuckled as Harry and Ron joined them. Harry looked at him brightly hugging him, “Sirius, I haven’t seen you in so long. H-how are you?”

“It hurts but I’m ok.” Sirius said eyes going down. “You?”

“Could be better.” Harry nodded looking at his friends apologetically. “Excuse us.”

Harry took his hand pulling him away from the crowd and out a side door into an actual alley. Sirius looked around confused as Harry tugged him towards a more secluded area he put up a quick notice me not on them as they stood in an abandoned archway. He turned quickly and Sirius found himself being kissed and felt by needy hands.

“Harry?” He managed to squeak out between kisses.

“I. Missed you. So much.” Harry panted stepping into him so their bodies where pressed against each other. Sirius was forced back till he was mashed against the door, he startled at this but Harry was encouraged by his gasp kissing him deeper. Sirius was becoming alarmed at being so trapped between Harry’s body and the door, he brought his hands up forcing his palms into Harry’s chest. Harry blinked stepping back casting his eyes down at his hands, he took them gently holding them as he gave him space. “Sorry, I was just- really excited to see you. This summer has been awful.”

“Yeah… I get that.” Sirius said following Harry as they walked back towards their friends. He paused at a toy store window seeing a dark colored dog plush, it looked like Snuffles he sighed sadly. Harry looked at him then the window, when Sirius started walking again. Sirius asked awkwardly, “Well shall we go back?”

“Yeah before- Hang on.” Harry leaned watching out of the alley scowling. He pulled out his invisibility cloak wrapping them both in it he took his hand. “Stay close to me. I saw Draco and his parents, they don’t look like they want to be followed.”

“So we’re following them because?” Sirius asked as they shuffled along under the cloak following them into Knockturn Alley. Harry simply muttered that they were up to something which seemed like a pretty dumb reason to follow someone. Sirius complied however as they followed them to a shop his mother used to frequent Borgin and Burkes, she always made him and Regulus wait outside.

“This place sells Dark Objects Harry.” He whispered as the Malfoy’s walked in. Harry hurried over catching the door starting to step through when Sirius felt prickles over his skin. He glanced up seeing the runes too late. Harry stepped through but Sirius was yanked from his hand and thrown backwards. He landed out of the cloak a few feet back, he groaned rolling up holding his lower back.

“Well, well.” Lucius Malfoy said as he excited the shop glaring down at him. “It’s been a long time squib. Trying to find your way back to Barrick’s? I’m sure if he wasn’t in Azkaban he’d still use you old as you are.”

Sirius scrambled to his feet looking up at the older man. He stepped back as Lucius stepped towards him, his eyes darting around for Harry. Surly he didn’t just leave him here? He swallowed hard as Lucius started to remove his wand from his snake staff. Sirius whistled and Spike lunged, Lucius yelled covering his face and Sirius booked it whistling Spike back to him.

He ran not really sure where he was going but he didn’t want to be by him. He glanced at Spike seeing his friend swooping along by him, he turned back to see if he was being followed. He didn’t see Mr. Malfoy, he relaxed slightly leaning against a wall wondering where on earth he was now as the many shady people walked around him. Spike landed on his shoulder hissing angrily.

“Sirius!” He nearly jumped out of his skin at Harry’s disembodied voice sounded in his ear. “What happened? Are you alright?”

“Umm… I’m fine.” He said hopefully looking at Harry’s face as Spike returned to his ear. “It was an anti-squib rune. It threw me back. Explains why mother always left us outside.”

“I hate those things.” Harry spat bitterly from under his cloak, a hand peeked out of the cloak pulling him under as someone ran towards them. Remus stopped checking his spell turning to the blank air.

“I know you both are there come out.” He growled crossing his arms, they came out looking at him guiltily. Remus sighed in relief, grabbing Sirius pulling him close. “Come on, Knockturn Alley is not the place for you two.”

“Remus,” Harry said jogging next to him as they power walked out of the alley. “I think Draco is a Death Eater. He was threatening a shop keep with a mark on his arm. I saw him do it.”

“Harry, this is something best left to the adults.” Remus said simply. “And to be discussed at a later time.”

********

Sirius sat in his room rather bored that night. He had been staring at the page of his book rather blankly. Finally he sighed shutting it, he hadn’t made any progress on it and dinner smelt like it would be ready soon anyways. Knocking on his window got his attention, he opened it letting Hedwig in. She flew in dropping a package into his hands before going to land on Spike’s perch drinking some water. Spike immediately shot off to join her curiously while she looked put off by his presence.

Sirius chuckled opening Harry’s letter. ‘Dear Sirius, I miss him too and I hope this one can keep you company when I can’t. – Harry.’ Sirius put the letter down and opened the package revealing the dark colored dog plush from earlier, the one that looked like his brother’s animagi form. He let out a bitter cry moving to put him on the shelf safely next to Prongs Jr.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> R.I.P. Regulus Black - You were a great brother an a absolute joy to write. *Wand salute*
> 
> Please don't kill me... This death was going to happen since the beginning. I love Regulus he's one of my favorite characters.


	23. Chapter 23

“Slug club is awful.” Harry groaned accidently bumping Ginny as he caught Sirius’s eye across the table. “I should make you come with me and we can suffer together.”

“Harry I’m in Slug club with you.” Ginny said giggling as Minerva handed out class schedules. Unfortunately Sirius stint as a student was over, he looked at Hermione’s schedule longingly figuring out when he’d be sitting in on classes.

“Going to come to any of our classes this year?” Hermione asked as the group stood.

“Probably, Herbology, Care and Keeping of Magical Creatures and History of magic.” He said scratching Spike making the swooping evil uncurl.

“Blimmy he’s as big as a dinner plate!” Ron gasped, as Spike crawled across Sirius’s shoulders.

“Yeah and he’s not even fully grown.” Sirius said turning to place a kiss on his skull. “See you later.”

“Where are you going?” Harry asked. “What about potions?”

“Severus says I can’t go anymore, he’s teaching defense and it’s up to the new teacher if I can go to potions.” He said. “Besides I like helping Hagrid and Remus in the fields.”

“You should ask to come. I love sharing classes with you.” Harry said as Hermione nodded.

“Fine. I’ll probably try talking to him later this week see what he says.” Sirius said smirking, “I’ll see you later.”

He waved them off, heading to Hagrid’s hut. He saw Remus a ways away feeding and tending the flobberworms. He was going to go that way when the half giant ran out to him panting. “There ya’ are. I got something special for you today.”

Sirius followed him to a shed where held up his hand for him to wait as he went in. He heard a motor start, which was confusing till Hagrid slowly drove out a motorcycle. Sirius stared at it, it looked incredibly familiar.

“Right then, here you are Sirius.” Hagrid said looking at him. “Well blimmy, don’t you recognize your brothers bike?”

He startled pointing at it. “This is Reggie’s bike?” He walked up rubbing his hand over the metal. “I used to ride with him when I was little.”

“Aigh that you did.” Hagrid said getting off. “I got it when he was arrested, and he couldn’t use it in hiding… But I think he would have wanted you to have it now.”

“Wait, what? I can’t fly!” Sirius argued only to be grabbed under the arms by the half giant and sat on the bike, Hagrid sitting down behind him.

“Right then. Turn it on grab the handles and let’s take this baby for a spin.” Hagrid said slapping his hands together. “Feet in the holds please, the bike will stay up on its own.”

“Hagrid I can’t fly.” Sirius said turning to look at him dumbfounded.

“Well not with that attitude.” Hagrid said, “Blimmy Sirius, Regulus spent hours making this thing good for us ‘non magic’ folks. Now turn it on and lets go for a spin.”

Sirius sighed, turning back around. He lifted his feet and turned on the bike, holding the handles he followed Hagrid’s instructions. They drove the bike around the field, on the ground, while he got a hang of it. It was magicked not to crash which was a relief since he was sure he would have toppled them over by now with his jerky driving. Remus seemed to think it funny till Sirius almost gunned it into him.

“It’s alright.” Hagrid said thumping his back rather hard. “It’s not an easy machine this muggle thing.”

“If it makes you feel better Regulus only added charms to stop it from crashing after he fell off one to many times. Sometimes in air.” Remus said bemused.

“Right air.” Hagrid said reaching around him flipping a little switch. “Let’s go, in air’s a different experience.”

“Wait in air!?” Remus yelled. “He could fall!”

“Nonsense Regulus charmed the seat to hold its rider.” Hagrid said, “Come on then.”

“Don’t worry Remus it won’t work for me anyway.” Sirius said twisting the handle, the bike launched into the air at a surprising speed. Sirius was sure he let out a barrage of swears as Hagrid started yelling for him to pull up. He did as he was told dodging the top of a tree. Spike uncurled hissing he flew off following along with them.

“Left! Left!” Hagrid yelled, as Sirius yanked the handle bars away from the astronomy tower. However he yanked right instead, so now they were flying at Hogwarts castle. Hagrid was yelling all sorts of directions at him, Sirius was trying to focus on those, the bike, not crashing and not hitting Spike.

“Stop!” Sirius yelled cutting Hagrid off, he just needed to think.

He pulled the bike horizontal slamming the wheels on the castle, he drove on it like a sideways road as Hagrid began a panicked screaming behind him. He drove around a window, before hoping the bike off the castle using a bit of roof as a ramp getting back into the sky. He swerved around a few towers before he ducked the bike under a bridge between spires. He pulled it up flying a bit over the forbidden forest seeing the intense darkness bellow. Finally he was able to whip the bike around bringing it back towards Hagrid’s hut where he managed to land it rather roughly by a horrified Remus.

He looked up his hair felt a little crazy from the wind, he turned around looking at a rather pale Hagrid as Spike landed on Sirius’s shoulder. “That was great! Can we go again!?”

“No...” Hagrid mumbled getting off slowly holding his stomach. “Oh Merlin- he drives like a knight bus- or Regulus. Whichever is worse.”

“Sirius!” Remus said running up face contorted in fear. “Are you alright?”

“Yeah! That was great! I loved it!” Sirius yelled practically bouncing. “I just had to get used to it and it was- wow!”

“Well-” Hagrid said swaying. “I taught him to use it. It’s yours now Sirius, you don’t need magic to make it fly. I- I have to lie down.”

“Thank you! Thank you!” Sirius yelled, he’d never been this excited before besides when Regulus came home. He looked at Remus who was rather pale at this revelation. “It’s like I have a part of Reggie! Remus I can fly now!”

“Great.” Remus said nodding wide eyed. “Just great.”

**********

“I mean I knew flying was fun but I’ve only ever been a passenger. Hermione it’s freaking amazing!” Sirius said leaning into her as they walked to potions early. She smiled at him, “I can fly Hermione. Me! I never thought that would be a thing. I could take you for a ride sometime?”

Hermione blanched at the idea, “Oh- no- no- I prefer to stay on the ground.” Sirius’s shoulders slumped, Hermione elbowed him. “Take Harry. I’m sure he’d love it.”

“He plays quidditch.” Sirius said, “I’m sure flying with me would be boring… Stay here, I’m going to talk to Professor Slughorn alone.”

Hermione nodded as he entered the class. Slughorn looked up smiling baffled at him, “Who are you my boy? I don’t recognize you.”

“I’m Sirius Black, I wanted to talk to you about your class Professor.”

“A Black! A member of the sacred 28 no doubt.” Slughorn said grabbing his hand shaking it rigorously. “What about my class?”

“I was hoping to be allowed to sit in on it.” Sirius said Slughorn gave him a puzzled look at this. “I’m a squib sir and I was hoping-”

“A squib? How curious.” Slughorn said taking his hand back he tried to discreetly wipe it on his robes. He turned past him walking to his floo, “Who takes care of you?”

“Severus and Remus.” Sirius said watching him nod. He figured Slughorn was checking if they approved of him coming here. He jumped up to sit on the desk as Slughorn asked Severus to come through.

“Off the desk you’ll get it dirty.” He said motioning him down.

Sirius slipped off looking up as Severus walked in looking annoyed having caught their exchange. “Is there a reason you called me here Horace?”

“Ah yes. I needed help dealing with this.” Slughorn said gesturing at Sirius. Severus raised a brown questionably. When he didn’t say anything Slughorn continued talking, “Well he can’t stay here. He’s yours apparently, take him back with you.”

Severus raised his brows at him while Sirius stared at him mouth slightly open dumbfound. Sirius cleared his throat, “Sir there must be a mistake. I was asking if I could stay in your class and observe.”

Slughorn chuckled looking at him like he told a funny joke. “Who put that idea in his head? Squibs have no business being around potions. Although I knew a man who thought otherwise. He thought you could use their parts in potions.” Sirius blanched

“That is quite enough.” Severus said crossing his arms a foul look on his face.

“Yes, yes. I thought it rather distasteful too use a squib in such a way.” Slughorn said frowning. “Anyway. A potions lab is no place for a squib, he could dirty up the ingredients. Don’t you agree Severus?”

“No. As a matter of fact I quiet enjoy teaching _my child_ potions.” Severus said wrapping his arm around Sirius. He looked up at him, he was doing it again referring to him as his son. Then again didn’t Sirius call them dads a few months ago?

He glanced at Slughorn as he stumbled over his words. “Well I didn’t think-”

“No you didn’t.” Severus said pushing Sirius towards the floo. “And I don’t _ever_ want to hear you referring to him as ‘dirty’ again.”

Severus flooed them to their quarters right as Remus walked in. He looked at them covered in soot he tsked his tongue. Sirius whirled looking at Severus as Remus cleaned them. “What do mean when you say that?”

Severus blinked at him confused, “That I’ll report him for his horrid remarks about you. And maybe slip a boil potion in his morning drink.”

“What remarks?” Remus asked.

“Horace Slughorn. He called Sirius- dirty.” Severus said walking around them as Remus growled.

“How dare he! I never liked him as a teacher but this-”

“No not that.” Sirius said quickly following Severus. “You called me your child.”

Severus shared a sad look with Remus, they both sighed. Sirius looked at him expectantly, Severus gave him a long look before speaking. “I’m sorry. It was a slip of the tongue. It won’t happen again.”

“Oh…” Sirius wasn’t sure why that made him upset but it did. They weren’t his parents, even though they raised him… And cared for him when he was sick. Protected him. They were always there for him. And they said they loved him. He found himself getting very frustrated now, he glanced up at them. “I’m going to my room!”

He rushed away from them slamming the door. Spike jumped off flying to his perch as Sirius threw himself on his bed. They didn’t want him like that, that’s what it was he thought angrily. He pushed them away too much in the past and he ruined it. Frustrated tears perked his eyes, he rubbed them away furiously.

**********

Remus sighed hearing the door slam. Severus looked down upset, “I’m sorry Remus. I didn’t mean to upset him. I was so mad at Horace. He called Sirius dirty twice. Twice in the span of a five minute conversation.”

“That’s horrid. We should speak to Dumbledore about him.” Remus growled.

“That’s not all. He wouldn’t even acknowledge him when Sirius talked to him.”

“People can be so cruel.” Remus said though he felt like Severus wasn’t telling him everything. “I don’t want him around Sirius.”

“Indeed.” Severus said, “I was trying not to lose my temper at him. I love teaching Sirius potions. So when he tried to get me to agree with him I snapped and called Sirius ‘my child’.” Remus closed his eyes in understanding he nodded his head as his husband quietly added. “I know he doesn’t see us that way. But I…”

“I know.” Remus said softly wrapping his arms around him. “I know…”

**********

His friends where furious after he told them about Slughorn rejecting him joining potions. He left out key bits like getting called dirty and being ignored, it was humiliating enough to live it once. He just said Severus came through the floo to try to help convince him and when it didn’t work took him home.

“He’s the worse bloody teacher ever.” Harry growled.

“Umbridge.” Sirius muttered.

“Fine second worse.” Harry said

“Fake Moody.” Hermione whispered.

“Lockhart…” Ron added.

“Fine he’s just horrible!” Harry said grabbing Sirius’s hand under the table. “How could he reject you? You’re brilliant at potions.”

“Thanks but I can’t brew them. That’s probably why he did accept me to his class.” Sirius lied feeling Harry squeeze his hand.

“Well I still rather dislike him.” Harry said, “It’s annoying and I’m expected to butter up to him to get some information. Ridicules.”

“Harry you have too.” Hermione said sadly, “Just pretend to like him.”

“Fine… Come on Ron help me get another round of butterbeers.” Harry said releasing Sirius’s hand to stand.

“Sure mate.” Ron said following him, he bumped into Hermione’s chair mumbling an apology as he left.

He followed her eyes seeing her watching Ron rather intently as him and Harry walked away. Sirius smirked, “You know- If I didn’t know better. I’d think you have a crush on Ron the way you’re staring at him.”

“Sirius!” She said looking at him face red as he laughed. He stopped laughing seeing Ginny approach Harry leaning into him as she rubbed her fingers along his bicep, Hermione followed his gaze. “You two could always come out as a couple. It would put a stop to that.”

Sirius shook his head. “I can’t take the attention. Remember Skeeter and her horrible article? I want to be is boyfriend, not called his pet or his squib.”

Hermione nodded sadly at him. “Well on a lighter note you’ll be physically seventeen this year a legal adult. Any fun plans.” She said as he paled, “I’ve already signed up for apparition classes, they’ll start over Christmas break I’m really excited- Sirius are you ok?”

He stared off wide eyed, he was going to be physically seventeen a legal adult. He was already years older but still. His hands shook, he didn’t think they’d get rid of him. What if they did? He wasn’t a little kid anymore, he wouldn’t technically need them. He clutched his fists tight he didn’t want them to leave him.

She shoved him looking at him worried, he smiled at her. “Sorry zoned out.”

She gave him a skeptical look but nodded all the same when Ginny joined them with her drink. She smiled politely, “The boys are still getting butterbeers. But I wanted to have girl talk real quick.”

“I’m a boy.” Sirius said annoyed.

“Whatever. Pavati’s boyfriend broke up with her.” Ginny said leaning in, “Apparently he was only dating her because he thought she would put out.”

“That’s horrible.” Hermione said, Sirius stared down at the table.

“Yeah, she’s real heart broken.” Ginny said as Hermione scowled.

“Why would she be heartbroken over a pig?” She said crossing her arms, Ginny shrugged.

“Just telling you what I know.” She scoffed as the guys joined bring butterbeers.

An hour later they were walking back together, Ginny smiling and laughing walking very close to Harry. Sirius on his other side raising his brow as she glared at him. Harry just talked to Ron and didn’t seem to notice anything amiss.

He looked ahead seeing two girls arguing over a package, when one of them was very violently yanked up into the air. The second girl screaming as it happened, Harry broke into a run with them following quickly. They jumped up pulling her down, when Harry turned grabbing him as they started running to Hogwarts to get help.

The poor girl had been taken to the hospital wing then to St. Mungo’s. Sirius was shaking as they told McGonagall what happened. He reached out going to take Harry’s hand for comfort, when Ginny suddenly clung to Harry expressing how horrible the whole thing was. Harry tried to convince McGonagall that he saw the necklace at Borgan and Burkes and that Draco did it but she denied him, stating Draco had been in detention all day.

Sirius hated all of it, everything that happened today was terrible. He was reminded he was going to be seventeen, someone had cursed a student and worst of all Ginny wouldn’t stop flirting with Harry. However he knew he won in the end, it was a full moon and he had a kind boyfriend that he got to spend the night with. He gave Hermione a hug goodnight and waved bye to Ginny smugly before following up the guys for the night.

They spent the night eating Bert Bots every flavor jelly beans, Harry would bite the corners off the jelly beans giving him the ones he deemed edible. Seamus had attempted holding Spike, but upon his whistle Spike had lunged making the other teen scream. The other boys had thought it funny though. Slowly they started going to bed.

Sirius woke up in Harry’s arms only a tad annoyed that he acted like devils snare when he slept, limbs where all over him. He tapped Harry awake, he groaned but looked at him all the same struggling to put his glasses on.

“Morning,” Harry said from his spot basically on top of him. Harry grabbed him rolling them over so Sirius was laying on him, knowing he didn’t like feeling trapped. He leaned up capturing Sirius’s lips, he kissed him back feeling hands roaming over him. Slowly those hands went lower squeezing and needing his bottom.

He felt Harry tugging his pants down freeing his member. He paused his kissing to look at him curious as Harry shimmied his own pants down. He reached down wrapping his hand around both their cocks together, Sirius made a tiny moan at this as Harry started stroking them.

“Sirius.” Harry said pulling his chin to kiss him. Sirius kissed him happily, only breaking to let out little gasps. Harry used his thumb to smear the precum down their shafts getting a nice lubed motion. Sirius breathed deeply at this when he felt fingers poking his lips. “Open your mouth, please.”

Sirius did what he was told not really sure what to do with two fingers in his mouth. He found himself sucking them as Harry moved them about circling his tongue. It felt really weird, he looked up at Harry expectantly but he was looking at him like he was doing something majestic. He opened his mouth gasping as Harry sped up his stroking. 

“Can we try something a bit more?” Harry asked, Sirius nodded agreement as Harry removed his fingers. He felt those saliva slicked fingers ghosting his back then the curve of his ass then poking at his entrance. He jerked up alarmed at the touch before he lowered himself back to Harry. He trusted him, he would stop if he asked, he reminded himself nervously. He couldn’t help it that he froze up as one digit was pushed in. He squeezed his eyes tight ready for pain but it didn’t come. He blinked his eyes open looking at Harry as the other kissed him patiently waiting while still stroking them.

It was a slow motion at first just moving his finger in and out. Sirius adjusted to it and was actually stating to enjoy it when a second finger gently pushed in. He groaned blushing deeply as Harry stared at him licking his lips. He winced feeling him start to scissor, though quickly he started panting at the duel motions of being stroked and stretched. Harry thrust his hips up at him bouncing them slightly. It felt so good.

“Sirius, can we do more?” Harry asked removing his fingers and releasing their cocks leading his hips up. Sirius looked at him nervously he bit his lip giving a single nod. Harry led his hips back as Sirius sat up on his knees. Harry grabbed the base of his cock lowering Sirius on it, he paused when it touched his entrance. He was so scared it would hurt, or Harry wouldn’t stop, or he’d rip him. He felt Harry’s hands trying to lightly push him down he looked up at him alarmed. He didn’t want Harry to leave him if he didn’t ‘put out’ but he was so scared. He felt the head pushing in and didn’t know how to back out. He was shaking like crazy, his face crumpled, he was worried he was going to cry.

“Sirius? Does it hurt?” Harry asked eyes darting up to him concerned. He shook his head no. It didn’t hurt. He had been feeling really good actually. Harry’s brow furrowed unconvinced, “Do you want to stop?”

“…Yes… Please stop…” He said softly making Harry freeze, Sirius closed his eyes tight afraid of being struck or forced down but Harry carefully helped him off. Sirius’s eyes opened wide as he was moved. Harry didn’t hit him. Harry didn’t force him. _Harry had stopped_. He blinked at him owlishly his eyes starting to water. “You’re not mad? You won’t make me?...”

“Of course not! Its fine, I would never be mad about this. We’ll wait.” Harry said pulling him down to lay with him again, kissing his temple Sirius breathed in relief. Harry had stopped. He’d asked and Harry stopped. He could die of happiness. He found someone that cared and respect him enough to listen. He clung to Harry’s shirt hiding his face in his neck silently crying, Harry sighed reaching down to pull their pants back into place.

“I’m sorry…” Sirius mumbled against his neck.

“What for?” Harry asked holding him protectively.

“For ruining the moment.”

“Sirius. There was no moment if you weren’t happy.” Harry said kissing his head.

**********

Remus sat with his husband looking at Dumbledore’s hand horrified. The older man groaned as Severus tried a potion to save his life, yet it didn’t work. His husband glared at the hand frustrated, “I’m sorry I cannot stop it. In time this will kill you.”

Remus sighed closing his eyes frustrated as Dumbledore spoke. “Then we must continue with the plan. Severus, Remus you must understand. I believe Tom made Horcruxs.”

“Horcruxs?” Severus repeated.

“Yes, the ring that cursed me. I believe it was one.” Dumbledore said, withdrawing his hand. “The diary that released the basilisk, also one. I believe there are seven.”

“Seven!” Remus hissed, “Merlin he’s insane.”

“Indeed. My boys, I’m dying. This curse will kill me. We must think only of the greater good from now on. Without me, you two should focus all your energy on following Tom and bringing him down from the inside. Especially you Severus.”

“I will not let you die without a fight.” Severus said.

Dumbledore smiled bitterly shifting in his seat. “I need him to trust you most above all others. If I cannot keep the students of Hogwarts safe you must take my place. Protect them Severus.”

“But we need to protect Sirius.” Remus argued, “We can’t abandon him.”

“No, but you cannot let your feeling cloud your judgment.” Dumbledore said. Remus grit his teeth as Dumbledore held up a hand continuing. “Sirius will hold Harry back. So you need to keep him away from Harry. He cannot slow him down. Keep them separated.”

“That’s not fair!” Remus said.

“How do you propose we do that?” Severus said crossing his arms. “Those two are stupidly infatuated with each other.”

“You must find a way.” Dumbledore said nodding to himself. “It’s for the greater good.”

Remus hated those words ‘for the greater good’. He hated that Dumbledore was willing to discard Sirius so easily. He’d been through enough did he really need to get treated this way too. He had avoided Dumbledore for days too angry to even look at him. Severus and himself had come to the solid conclusion that they could not leave Sirius, Dumbledore be damned. Remus at least would be with him no matter what especially since Harry was not an option. In a way he realized Dumbledore was right, Sirius would slow Harry down. He couldn’t apparate, use portkey’s or do magic but in the same sense he would slow Remus down if they went on the run. Severus was trying to get him to agree to flee the country, but Remus was sure there was another way.

**********

Sirius wasn’t too excited at the idea of ‘turning’ seventeen tomorrow. He should be asleep it was rather late after all, he sat up deciding to pace. After doing a few laps of his room and getting an annoyed look from Spike he figured he’d go get a glass of water. He cracked open the door and tip toed down the hallway when he heard his guardians talking.

“Sirius can’t stay here.” Severus said bluntly, he froze. Sirius’s heart sped up, they wanted to get rid of him.

“Yes I understand but what will we do with him?” Remus responded. “Another country isn’t any option.”

“Remus it’s for the best I’m trying to come up with a plan that-”

“I don’t want to talk about this more.” Remus snapped. Sirius scrambled back to his room as Remus headed his way. He’d barely thrown himself into his bed when his door opened. He feigned sleep as Remus cautiously walked in. He felt him fix his covers, and kiss his head. Just as quietly Remus snuck out.

Sirius did not sleep that night, and was rather jittery all day. He was glad to have excuses to avoid them staying in Gryffindor’s common room with his friends. Though Ginny was driving him up the wall enough to consider going back. She looked up at him, “Sirius isn’t it almost curfew. Shouldn’t you head out?”

“I’m not a student. I don’t have a curfew.” He said.

“Brilliant.” Harry said leaning into him smiling.

Maybe a half an hour after that McGonagall walked in, her lips where pursed as she scanned the room. Finally her eyes landed on their group, she marched over casting a stern look at Sirius. “Mr. Black, it’s past curfew. Why are you still here?”

“I don’t have a curfew.” He said more like a question.

“Oh believe me you do.” She said almost amused, “A very- concerned Remus is in my floo. Now come along.”

“Yes Professor.” Sirius grumbled embarrassed following her out. He was going to walk back when she grabbed him redirecting him to her office. She pushed him towards the floo, he just stared at her. “I can’t use the floo.”

“Merlin that’s right, do forgive me.” She said, she stepped forward taking his arm gently. She landed gracefully, Sirius spilled out of the floo, only her hand on his shoulder kept his face from the floor. Remus ran up thanking her as she left whispering ‘good luck.’

“It’s past curfew. What were you thinking?” Remus asked waving his wand cleaning him of soot.

“But I don’t have a curfew. I’m not a student.” Sirius said as Remus furrowed his brows upset. Sirius felt guilty at this he should have come home, he’s practically giving them more reasons to get rid of him.

“Remus he’s right.” Severus said, “We never gave him a curfew.”

“Well from now on you follow curfew like the rest of the school.” Remus said sighing. “Don’t do that again either, or we will ground you. Now go take a shower and off to bed.”

Sirius stalked off. He wasn’t happy with them but he also didn’t want them mad at him. So he tried to stop himself from sulking too much. He got ready quickly and put Spike in is cage for bed. He climbed under his covers as a knock sounded on his door.

“Sirius before you go to bed.” Remus said opening the door to his room. Sirius cursed sitting up to look at him as he and Severus joined him, holding a milky blue potion. Severus handed it to him, he took it rather unwillingly as Remus kept talking. “I’m sorry I was upset earlier. There’s a lot on my mind right now.”

“Indeed.” Severus said looking at him. “Drink up, tomorrow’s your birthday and we have some- things we need to talk to you about. For the future.”

Sirius blinked owlishly at them, they were going to make him leave. No, they wouldn’t do that, he told himself. Maybe he heard them wrong and he was over reacting. He rubbed the potion between his hands uncomfortable as Remus kept talking. He wasn’t really listening he tuned back in hearing him say something about it being for the best. He looked up at this trying to mask his growing fear and anxiety. He didn’t want to leave them. He opened the bottle and in the split second they looked away dropped it.

“Oh dear!” Remus cried watching it spill onto the floor.

“I’m sorry.” Sirius said putting on his best sad eyes. “It was an accident.”

“Of course love.” Remus said spelling it clean.

“It’s fine. I’ll have a new one ready soon.” Severus said smiling at him. Sirius nodded in fake happiness. Good he thought nodding he bought himself some time.

The next time the potion was ready, he knew he couldn’t ‘drop’ it. He went into the bathroom after dinner knowing it would be presented at bed time. He would not leave them. He stuck his fingers down his throat cursing his strong gag reflex but eventually he was vomiting. Remus had immediately come to check on him, he had been sent to bed early, no potion. He ravished in them taking care of him. He was able to keep this up for three days before they started talking of sending him to Madam Pomfrey. He stopped then but still maintained his stomach was to tender a few days extra.

Unfortunately now he was getting desperate, he couldn’t dodge them much longer. He sat begrudgingly on his bed knees to his chest, he was honestly debating throwing himself down the stairs and claiming a concussion. Alas he sighed, he couldn’t do that to them. He knew they’d be horrified plus he wasn’t sure how long he could safely put off the next dose before something bad happened to him. He was already starting to feel not right though he couldn’t put his finger on why, he almost wondered if it was in his head.

Hermione said he should talk to them, he thought she was right. He sucked up his annoyance and fear walking into their small living room. Severus was grading papers and Remus was trying to gently talk him into being more lenient on students.

“I need to talk to you.” Sirius said making them both look up. He scooted around sinking into a chair, as they looked at him. “I did something stupid. And was- going to do something stupider.”

“Alright?” Remus asked settling him with a kind but concerned look. “What exactly?”

Sirius glanced down unable to meet their eyes breathing deeply, “I wasn’t really sick, I made myself sick and I was thinking of throwing myself down the stairs.” He braced for something, anything, he wasn’t sure what. When they were quiet he continued, “I’m scared.”

“Sirius, why?” Remus asked.

“You want me to take my unstunter, I’ll be physically seventeen and I’m a lot older already and-” He stopped sniffling wiping his eyes starting to cry. “I didn’t want you to leave me. And I didn’t want to be alone. I’m sorry! I-I don’t think you’d just leave me but- I’m still scared.”

“Sirius we’re right here.” Severus said as they stood walking to him. “We weren’t going to leave you just because you got older.”

“Oh Sirius we love you.” Remus said softly stroking his hair back. “You’re stuck with us for life.”

Sirius looked up at them nervously. “I- I believe you. I really do but I overheard you talking about how I can’t stay here. W-Why can’t I stay with you? Don’t you want me?”

“Of course we want you.” Severus said, “As too why we don’t think you can stay here…”

They shared a look sitting back down on the couch. They dove into a long explanation, about Dumbledore’s curse and about how he had asked Severus to kill him when the time came. He blinked dumb founded at this information as Severus told him he was going to do it, that he would kill Dumbledore if that’s what it took to win the war. That he was willing to look like a traitor to keep tabs on the Dark Lord, to keep the students of Hogwarts safe.

“So you see Sirius.” Severus said softly, “We’re still learning more about him as we go but my role in the war is very dangerous. You and Remus- you’ll have to leave me eventually.”

“Why?” He asked, “Remus has always acted along with you. He’s a spy too.”

“The Dark Lord wishes for me to continue experimenting on you.” Severus said sighing unable to look at him. “I will never do that. So…”

“So we have to leave him.” Remus said simply hurt on his face. “I’ll leave him to keep you safe.”

“No!” Sirius cried. “That’s a terrible plan!”

“Sirius…”

“No, really it’s a bad plan.” Sirius stated, “Then we’d just be on the run. It would be pointless I’d slow you down. And Severus would lose his support.”

“Sirius it’s not that simple. We’re working on a plan with Dumbledore. We-”

“It’s a stupid plan!” Sirius snapped, “You wanted me to be ‘seventeen’ for this talk. If you want me to be an adult treat me like one! I have a better idea. I’ve read tons of books.” He said jumping up collecting one from the shelf showing them. “I’ve been ‘dead’ once, I could be dead again. We could stay together. Make them think you killed me, look at this potion. It’s called fulgorque exspiravit.”

“Sirius?” Remus questioned standing to read over his shoulder.

“That is a very old potion Sirius. Very hard to make.” Severus said.

“Yeah but still. It would make me look dead.” Sirius said looking at them. “You could stay together. You could still do your mission and I could help. I mean people believed I died once. Isn’t this a better option then us going on the run? I could live in like an expanding bag or something until we’re back at Hogwarts.”

Severus blinked at him while Remus came up smirking. “I think he might have a point, love.”

Severus sighed deeply, “Very well but Sirius I’m not stuffing you in an expanding bag. We’ll think this through more. We still have- time.”

“Alright.” Sirius agreed, he looked down then back at them. “I’m sorry, for jumping to conclusions. I-”

“No Sirius we’re sorry we scared you.” Remus said quickly. “We love you and would never dream of leaving you.”

“But… But…” Sirius stumbled frustrated over his words, did they love him as a friend or as guardians or as… parents. They looked at him calmly waiting for him to collect himself. It wasn’t working, he kept struggling with his words. Remus took his arm gently leading him to the couch.

“No but’s Sirius we love you know matter what.” Severus said guessing at his problem. This made him more frustrated, he shook his head no at them.

“No I wanna know. Do you- how do you- what does that mean?” Sirius asked desperately.

“It means we’ll always be here for you love.” Remus said smiling at him.

“But how? Do you want me? I don’t understand, I thought I did but now I don’t.” Sirius said glaring down. Now they looked confused, they started trying to reassure him but they didn’t seem sure it’s what he wanted. Feed up Sirius looked at them, “What am I to you?”

They looked taken back at this, they shared a look almost like they were trying to have a conversation with their eyes alone. Sirius grit his teeth standing, fists tight. “Forget it!”

He started to step around Severus knees intending to disappear in his room when he was grabbed. They pulled him down making him basically fall on them. He scrambled displeased with this until Remus ran a hand through his hair. They stared down at him curiously as he settled legs on Severus, butt on the couch and upper body on Remus.

“What do you want us to be?” Severus started.

“Because we know what we want to be.” Remus finished. Sirius felt his heart speed up nervous, he just stared at them unable to answer. “We could tell you but you may not be happy.”

“Just tell me.” He demanded.

“Sirius,” Remus said taking his hand. “I- we-”

“I called you ‘my child’ for a reason.” Severus said bluntly.

“Oh Merlin yes Sirius.” Remus said, “We’d love for you to see us as parents and not just- guardians.”

“But we understand if you don’t.” Severus said quickly, “We know you were opposed to it before. We-”

“So you see me like your _son_ not a friend?” Sirius asked looking down, he felt a weird happy bewilderment. He heard them stuttering trying to tell him something, but he wasn’t listening. They did want him. They didn’t care what he went through. Or that he was a squib. Or stunted. They wanted to be his parents that loved him unconditionally. He reached up fast wrapping his arms around them startling them both into silence. “You want me. You really want me!”

Two sets of arms wrapped back around him. Remus spoke trying to hide his sobs, “Of course we do. We love you.”

“I love you too.” Sirius cried. “So… Umm… Are we like a family now?... What should I call you?...”

“Call us whatever makes you happy.” Severus said brushing his hair. “And we were always a family Sirius.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love the mental image of Hagrid the half giant screaming on the back of the motor bike while short sweet little Sirius drives like a freaking maniac.  
> Also all relationships are moving forward. :)  
> Let me know what you think!


	24. Chapter 24

Remus watched Dumbledore carefully as the old wizard stared at them deep in thought. They had come to him telling him the idea’s Sirius had, of hiding in plain sight. Dumbledore nodded silently as though thinking through a conversation with himself. Remus reached out taking his husbands hand as they waited. Finally he looked at them over his half-moon spectacles.

“How will you ‘kill’ him?” He asked.

“We’re not sure.” Remus said.

He nodded slowly, “Whatever you do will need an audience. Sirius would have to defy you to make it believable.”

“Agreed.” Severus said, “I was thinking a silent blinding light spell as a distraction.”

“Yes… Yes…” Dumbledore said. “One of you could do that and he could port key away.”

“He can’t use a port key.” Remus said.

“Remus could polyjuice to him and apparate away.” Severus said, Remus nodded agreement.

“No you must both go to Tom. Sirius is no wizard he could be found out if he mascaraed as Remus. And Severus you must protect the children of Hogwarts at all costs-”

“I need to protect my Sirius!” Severus snapped, Dumbledore narrowed his eyes at the interruption.

“Severus this is for the greater good.” He said making Remus’s lips curl. “The greater good comes before all else. The lives of the many are not worth risking for the life of one.”

“I will not cast my child aside as you have. What if it was someone besides me or Severus polyjuiced?” Remus said determined to find a solution.

“No. Nobody else must know what you are doing.” Dumbledore said.

“Then how will they ever believe us innocent?” Severus asked leaning forward.

“Memories of these discussions of course. And if we figure out how to fake Sirius’s death he would be a perfect source to prove innocence.” The old wizard said nodding, he rubbed his beard in thought. “What of a house elf? They can apparate.”

“We could polyjuice Dipsey or Dobby and swear them to secrecy.” Remus agreed.

“Then one of us could throw a silent blinding light spell and they could disappear. Thus ‘killing’ Sirius.” Severus agreed.

“Gentlemen I think we found your solution.” Dumbledore said eyes twinkling. “Now we need to work on motive.”

**********

Ginny was really annoying him, he ground his teeth and crossed his arms at her as she leaned heavily into Harry. Sure he had been dragged up by Harry and Hermione to celebrate the Gryffindor quidditch win and yeah someone had been giving them butterbeer but Sirius knew she hadn’t drunk enough to be that all over him. The party was bouncing around them as he stood next to Hermione, Ron on the table celebrating.

“I think I hate her.” He said bitterly watching Ginny run her hand along Harry’s shoulders.

“Sirius to be fair Harry should stop her.” Hermione said, Sirius blinked he hadn’t thought of that. “But I know what you mean. Boys are stupid. No offence.”

“None taken.” He said giving Harry a suspicious look as he unwound himself from Ginny his head swiveling looking around. He heard Hermione excuse herself, he glanced back at her quickly retreating form confused until he saw Ron and Lavender snogging heavily. He threw his head back, idiot he thought. He spun on his heel leaving the party, he heard her crying on the stairs hidden from prying eyes. He sat down next to her holding her hand silently.

“Sirius you should go back to the party.” She said weakly her face crumpled.

“I don’t like parties. Too many people. I like making sure my best friend’s ok.” He said feeling her lean on him sadly.

“Is this how it feels when Ginny flirts with Harry?” She cried.

“Yeah… It hurts.”

**********

Sirius was a little miffed at Harry. Hermione had made a really good point, he should stop Ginny from flirting with him. Yet he never did. Maybe he liked her attention? He thought bitterly stomping threw the dungeons to the kitchen. Her long pretty red hair, her pale scar free skin, her clean untouched body. He grit his teeth glaring at the ground rounding the corner he walked into the person in front of him.

He bounced of Draco’s chest, he stepped back jarred and alarmed seeing him and his two brute friends. Malfoy sighed heavily glaring at him, “What are you doing out squib? Your kind shouldn’t be roaming around unsupervised.”

“It’s none of your business.” Sirius snapped not amused.

“Oh squibs got his knickers in a twist.” Draco sneered as his friends moved blocking the hall. Sirius stepped back alarmed at this, he had Spike but all three of them would be too much alone like this. “Did you grow a backbone riding Potter’s dick? Don’t see why. You’re just there until he gets someone better.”

“Screw off!”

“Don’t talk like that to me. You’re a burden, a bad squib!” Draco snarled he reached up quickly snatching his hair. Sirius’s eyes widened grabbing his hand back stabilizing him from pulling. Goyle snickered, while Crabbe moved behind him so close if either moved they would be touching. Draco smirked, “Remember when you were little and we would go squib hunting? That was fun right? Then we’d make you tell us about Mr. Barrick.”

“It was sick!” Sirius cried as Draco forced his head down making him bend over bumping into Crabbe’s groin. Sirius teared up, “Why would you make me tell you what he did to me? I was freaking five!”

“Why? That’s easy- it made you cry.” Draco hissed.

Sirius wound his leg back donkey kicking Crabbe hard in the shin making him stumble, he then swung that leg forward planting his knee firmly in Draco’s balls. Malfoy released him swearing as he held himself. Goyle stared stunned for a second before fumbling with his wand, Crabbe had recovered and made to lung at him. Sirius threw the twins Peruvian Instant Darkness Powder filling the room with blackness as he booked it away from them.

Draco yelled after him, “You’re worthless! You’ll never be good enough for anything or anyone!”

Sirius ran all the way to the kitchen his heart pounding painfully as he tickled the pear. He stumbled inside holding his chest feeling like his heart would explode. Malfoy was such a prick, he sunk to the floor covering his face crying.

“Sirius Sir?” Dipsey said popping in front of him wringing her hands.

“Sirius?” Dobby asked concerned. “Is Sirius needing Dobby to fetch Harry Potter?”

“No! I don’t need Harry to take care of me.” Sirius said bringing his knees to his chest, his hair hurt. He reached up holding his head as Dipsey tilted her face into his view looking at him.

“Would Sirius like Master Remus or Master Severus?” She asked wide eyed.

“No. I just want to be left alone.” Sirius growled, burying his face in his knees still holding his head in pain. He felt the elves shifting around him uncomfortably. Dobby in particular was bouncing nervously back and forth. Dipsey meanwhile had come up carefully placing her little hand on his back patting him.

“Dipsey wants to see Sirius Sir happy.” She said softly, “Can we bake sweets till Sirius smiles?”

Sirius looked at her a moment before nodding, “Yeah Dipsey lets bake sweets.”

“Oh goody! Dobby will fetch the chocolate!” Dobby cheered making Sirius smile softly.

**********

“Slughorn’s Christmas party is today. I still need a date.” Hermione said suddenly, Harry jerked up alarmed, while Sirius tried not to show how annoyed he was at the idea.

He had been waiting for Harry to ask him, they were supposed to be boyfriends. Ron was snapping at Hermione about who she was going with that just annoyed him more. Ginny was leaning into Harry asking who he was going with when he said he didn’t know. He didn’t bloody know? Was he embarrassed by him? They could go as ‘friends’. Honestly he had enough of them he stood up quickly and left.

“Sirius!” He stopped waiting for Hermione to catch him.

“No offence Hermione, I was kind of hoping another Gryffindor might chase me down.” He grumbled staring back at the table furiously. “I mean what’s his deal anyway?”

“I don’t know the both of them are acting just awful.” She spat. “Who does Ron think he is? He’s dating Lavender but acting like he can tell me who I can and can’t go to a party with.”

“He doesn’t know who he’ll ask. Huh? What is he embarrassed by me? I get that we’re a secret but he could still bring me as a ‘friend’.” Sirius said as they stomped off venting. He slowed down looking at her guiltily, “Do you- do you think it’s because- do you think it’s because I wouldn’t go all the way with him?”

“What?” Hermione growled rounding on him. She looked ready to run back to the great hall to hex Harry. “Did he say something to you?”

“N-no! He just wanted to and I didn’t feel comfortable.” Sirius rubbed a scar on his arm. “He stopped but I was just worried.”

“Sirius Black,” She snapped, “That is not something you should ever have to worry about. If he loves you it won’t matter.”

“Oh he’s never said he loved me.” Sirius said simply, “Why would he?”

“Men!” Hermione snapped. “Sirius go with me to Slughorn’s party tonight. We’re going to go and have lots of fun, we don’t need them.”

“But…” He floundered for an excuse to stay away from Slughorn only to have her level him with a look. “Ok, ok. I’ll go.”

He really wasn’t a fan of the party, everyone all dressed up but Hermione looked pretty. Harry came with Luna, and Ginny with someone he didn’t know. Harry tried to catch his eye but he ignored him. Slughorn had approached Hermione quickly upon arrival grabbing her hand shaking it. “Ms. Granger lovely to see you.”

“Thank you sir” She said sweetly.

“Did you not bring a date?” He asked looking right through Sirius.

“No, I came with Sirius.” She said slightly confused.

“Oh? I had assumed he followed Professor Snape in.” Slughorn said smile faltering as he struggled with what to say. “Try not to let him touch too much stuff Ms. Granger. The house elves will be too busy with the holidays to do a deep clean.”

“What’s that supposed to mean sir?” Hermione asked furiously.

“Well I-”

“Come on Sirius, let’s get a drink.” Hermione said bluntly pulling him away. Once far enough she whirled on him, “How dare he talk like that. He was so rude and horrid.”

“It’s fine.” Sirius said quickly holding up his hands trying to pacify her. “It happens all the time.”

“That’s the reason he rejected letting you sit in on our class isn’t it?” She hissed. “We should tell a teacher, Dumbledore or your guardians. We-”

He reached out grabbing her arm. “Please stop! It’s humiliating enough to be called dirty and looked down on. Can we not let the whole school know?”

“Oh Sirius, I’m sorry I just want to help.” She said sadly.

“I know. But I can take care of myself.” He said making her smile. “Besides my parents already are aware of how he treats me.”

She looked at him a long moment before giving him an excited wide eyed smile at his words. He shot a look back daring her to say something as Neville walked up with a serving platter of sparkling wine. Sirius felt rather strange a wizard was serving him a squib. He blinked away his confusion at the role reversal following Hermione as she wisely didn’t say anything leading him to the hors d’oeuvres. A Hufflepuff gave him a bemused look as they passed, while a Ravenclaw turned up her nose. He decided to make a drinking game out of it every time someone gave him a funny look for being here one drink, snide comment two drinks.

He followed Hermione around like a shadow, not impressed with how he was being treated. Hermione looked at him, “Harry’s been trying to catch your eye since we arrived.”

“Well I’m right here.” He said bluntly, downing his drink he grabbed a new one. Spotting Harry awful close to Ginny as she leaned into him giggling. He started to down his next drink when Hermione’s hand pulled the drink down.

“Careful Sirius this is stronger than butterbeer.” She warned, “You’d be a bad date if I have to carry you back.”

“I’m not bad!” He snapped on reflex, she grabbed him pulling him behind some thin gold curtains.

“Sirius of course you aren’t bad.” She said gently. “I just don’t want you getting light headed from wine. That’s all. Are you alright?”

“Yes! … No.” He grumbled, he had so much stuff going on. In between losing Regulus and trying to figure out how to stay with Remus and Severus he was losing his mind. Not to mention he was frustrated to no end with Ginny and Harry. He lets Ginny hang on him. She’s so much better than him. No one bats an eye at her being here. While he was asked not to touch stuff because he’d get it dirty. He reached up trying to grab his head frustrated when she pulled his hands to hers, keeping his wine glass upright.

“Breath Sirius.” She reminded him kindly.

“Hermione… Why didn’t Harry ask me?” He questioned picking the easiest thing.

“I don’t know. But I’m here.” She said, he nodded glumly. “I- Oh Merlin Harry’s coming.”

He looked up as Harry pulled the curtain back. “Room for one more?”

Hermione gave him a questionable look but Sirius just nodded, she turned to Harry. “Actually I was just leaving.”

“Great. Bye Mione.” Harry said smiling as the curtain closed. Harry gave him a cautious look before side stepping into him. “Listen about tonight, I’m sorry I should have asked you.”

“Ya think.” He said pointedly looking away. “I get it Harry. I’m a squib you didn’t want to come with me even as a ‘friend’. I can see that from how Slughorn and his guests are treating me.”

“No Sirius I-”

“I’ve kind of been making it a drinking game. Funny look one drink, snide comment two drinks. Hermione’s worried I’ll be sloshed.” Sirius said.

“Sirius I didn’t ask you to go because I wasn’t going to go.” Harry said. “These Slug club meetings are terrible. I hate them. I’m only here because Dumbledore wants me to get on Slughorn’s good side and get a memory from him. So I didn’t even realize this was a date’s event. Of course I’d want to go with my boyfriend. Sirius I lov-”

“Oh I’m still your boyfriend with the way you let Ginny hang on you I couldn’t tell.” Sirius said trying to glare at him so he wouldn’t see how hurt he was.

“Ginny?”

“Yes Harry.” The teen in question asked joining them behind the curtain. “Oh Sirius, _your_ here.”

“That’s two.” Sirius said finishing his glass. “Excuse me I need another drink.”

He left rather annoyed nearly running into Severus as he did, he smiled guiltily dodging him. He couldn’t deal with him right now, he looked around for Hermione but couldn’t see her. He leaned against the wall glaring at his new drink.

“Hello.” He turned seeing a blonde haired witch staring at him with the most peculiar glasses on her head. “I like your swooping evil, it’s cute that you wear him as jewelry.”

“Oh, thanks. You’re Luna, from Harry’s ‘club’ last year.” He said as she nodded.

“And you’re Sirius, Harry’s boyfriend. You shouldn’t stand here, there are lots of nargles around mistletoe. They might try to get in your hair, they’re hard to wash out.”

“Thanks. How’d you know I was Harry’s boyfriend? Though I’m not sure how much longer that will be. I’m just there until he gets someone better.” He said parroting Draco as he walked with her to a new area. He spotted Hermione she looked like she was giving Harry a hard time.

“Hmmm… I don’t think that’s true. Harry smiles at you when you aren’t looking and looks worried when you’re upset. He’s actually looked worried this whole party.” She said he sighed defeated at this sipping his drink. “If you keep drinking like you are you’ll attract wrackspurts, they like it when our heads get fuzzy.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.” He said as her eyes slowly drifted up to the ceiling, Sirius followed her gaze but didn’t see anything. “Can squibs not see wrackspurts?”

“Oh, you need special glasses to see them. I’ll get you a Quibbler tomorrow they come with them. Then you can see them.” She said looking back at him amused. “I think you’d like it. You have unique taste like me.”

“Thanks.” He said seeing Harry walking towards them determined he sighed deeply.

She looked over too seeing Harry she smiled bemused. “Talk to him. He’ll listen to you. You are probably the only one that can boss around Harry Potter.”

“Sirius, Luna.” Harry said swallowing hard. “I’m sorry Luna I really need to talk to Sirius.”

“That’s fine. Be careful of wrackspurts.” She said, skipping away to talk to Hermione.

“Can we talk?” Harry asked, Sirius crossed his arms looking at him waiting. “Outside.”

Reluctantly he agreed he finished his drink before following him out into the hall, Harry led him around a few corners before trying to take him into an alcove. He froze staring at it, the last time he went into an alcove with someone during a party he got really hurt. Harry looked at him expectantly before seeming to realize the problem. He stepped out leading them a bit further, Sirius was getting a little annoyed at how far they were going till Harry paced making the room of requirement appear.

He followed him into a gently lit room, with a fireplace and two large couches facing each other. Spike climbed off immediately flying about the room happily. Harry sat on one couch and Sirius pointedly sat on the other. Harry sighed at this and Sirius waited afraid of what he would say.

“I need to apologize.” Harry said surprising him, “Hermione, rather roughly, pointed out that Ginny has been flirting with me and I’ve been more or less letting it happen. Sirius I’m so sorry. I honestly didn’t realize, I don’t even think of girls that way.”

Sirius pursed his lips at him, as Harry bowed his head continuing. “I’ve been a real arse about it. I’m sorry. Sirius I really care about you. I mean really- really care about you.”

Sirius stared at him confused, “Why? That doesn’t make sense.”

“Sirius-”

“I can’t do magic. I’m not pretty like her. I’m not what the world would expect you to be with. She is.” Sirius said leaning forwards glaring at him. “I’m worthless!”

“That’s not true!” Harry yelled standing, Sirius shrunk in on himself. “Sirius you’re amazing! You don’t need magic to fight. Need I remind you that you fought Death Eater’s without magic, you threw down both Malfoy’s without it. Sirius do you not know how handsome you are?” Harry was in front of him now looking him square in the eye. “Your smile alone could disarm people. And Sirius I don’t care what the world wants of me… I want you. I’m so sorry I messed up. Please don’t give up on us.”

“Harry… You want me?” Sirius said shocked. He hated that those words were so important to him. He was rejected in life so much by his mother, his father, by society by everyone. He looked at Harry, he had to be sure. He needed to be wanted so badly. “You want me? Even though I’m a squib and… tainted.”

“Of course I want you! And I’ll reassure you of that as many times as you need.” Harry said taking his hand. “Sirius, to me you’re perfect. I love you.”

“You love me?” Sirius asked looking at him wide eyed.

“Merlin yes Sirius.” Harry said squeezing his hand. “I’ve loved you for a while now and been too afraid to say it. Sirius, I love you.”

“I love you too.”

He crashed their lips together. Sirius held him desperately, Harry wanted him. Harry loved him. He felt hands on his hips while his where wrapped around Harry’s shoulders. He sat next to him and Sirius immediately climbed on his lap. Fingers grabbed at the buttons of his shirt, he grabbed at Harry’s never breaking their kissing. His pants where next along with his boxers, pulled down and removed as Harry franticly undid his own pants.

Harry pulled back kissing the scars down his chest, stopping only to lick and suck a nipple. Sirius gasped at this as Harry mumbled a spell against his skin. He wasn’t quite sure what he said but he felt slicked fingers probing his entrance. He froze up and Harry pulled his face back looking at him waiting for permission. Sirius felt so loved seeing him waiting for his ok, Sirius nodded yes.

He gasped as not one but two fingers pushed into him stretching. Harry went back to showering his body with kisses fingers moving in and out scissoring him as they did. Sirius blushed into him, wrapping his own hand around Harry’s member. Hips started to buck into his hand as he stroked him. Lips met his again as a third finger was added moving at a steady pace. Sirius moaned into the kiss, catching his lover’s dilated eyes. Harry smirked at him spreading his fingers making Sirius’s back arch, it felt so good.

“H-Harry.” He panted stopping his stroking as Harry moved his hand in a brutal pace. He tossed his head back. “I’m gonna- please stop.”

Harry looked at him alarmed stopping immediately. “I’m sorry was it to much-”

“I want to do more.” Sirius said cutting him off. “Please?”

“Ok!” Harry said shifting him quickly, his hand slipping free making Sirius feel empty. Harry grabbed his hips one handed, he wrapped his other around his member leading it to Sirius’s opening. Sirius cursed that he froze up muscles tensing, he closed his eyes he couldn’t look at him. He really wanted this, but why did he have to be so scared.

A hand left his hip stroking his face, “Sirius look at me.” Harry said, he opened his eyes slowly looking at him. “Are you sure you want to-”

“Yes, please! I trust you. I want you.” Sirius said blinking back his fear.

“Alright, look at me then.” Harry said prompting Sirius’s hips down. He lowered down and gasped breathing hard as he felt Harry’s member slowly pushing in. He tightened his grip on Harry’s shoulders clenching up. Harry rubbed his back with his free hand. “Breath, you’re ok. I won’t move till you’re ready.”

Sirius nodded lowering himself more and more. It didn’t hurt, he didn’t think he was splitting. It actually felt really good, he focused on that good feeling and the lust in Harry’s eyes. No not lust- love. He breathed gently at this realizing he was now sitting flush with Harry, the other man completely sheathed inside him. They were both panting hard at the sensation, Harry looking like he was trying not to finish right then and there.

“Sirius…” He moaned holding his hips. Sirius held his shoulders for support as he began lifting himself up and down on Harry. Harry let out a barrage of mumbled words, as Sirius got used to it quickly. He picked up the pace as Harry squeezed his hips tight but not painfully so. “Sirius… Oh Merlin…”

Sirius smiled enjoying the sounds Harry made. He lifted up when Harry grabbed his hips yanking him down while thrusting up into him. Sirius cried out Harry had hit something and it felt amazing. He started to stop worried but Sirius grabbed him demanding. “Don’t stop! Don’t stop!”

Harry obliged hitting it again and again making Sirius go absolutely crazy it felt so good. He was panting hard when he felt Harry flip them, he panicked at first landing on his back with Harry on top of him. He had thrown his hands against his chest intending to push him but this new angle Harry put them in had Sirius moaning in ecstasy. He wrapped his legs around Harry’s back as he was thrust into. He came almost immediately, body clenching and shuddering.

“Sirius!” Harry cried out, pushing in as deep as possible. He felt the warmth filling him and unlike the times before he didn’t feel disgusted he just felt happy. He glanced up at Harry, unsure what to do now, he tried to move assuming Harry wouldn’t want him here anymore or that he’d expect Sirius to lick him clean. Harry huffed holding him tight doing light after grinding into him. He looked at Sirius planting kisses along his jaw and then his lips. “Merlin that was amazing, please just cuddle with me. Sirius I love you.”

“I love you too Harry.” He said wrapping his arms around him snuggling into Harry contently.

**********

Sirius wasn’t happy. Severus and Remus had sent him to the Weasley’s for Christmas with Harry and Hermione. He liked being with his friends what he didn’t like was being away from his new official family. They had insisted he go claiming Remus was spying on the werewolves and Severus was doing death eater stuff. Both where true but it still felt bad being left behind.

He was a little restless, Harry had grabbed him asking to go for a walk. He agreed eager to get out of the house and get some alone time with him however Ginny had invited herself and Ron along. Hermione the kind wonderful woman she was had tried to dissuade them but her attempts fell on deaf ears. They tried again to get alone time sneaking onto the roof only to be joined by Fred and George who blissfully set off fireworks.

Sirius all but gave up on getting Harry alone when his boyfriend bolted down the stairs. He looked at Sirius and Mrs. Weasley, he smiled politely power walking to them. “Sorry Mrs. Weasley can I borrow your co-chef.”

“Oh of course dear.” She said smiling.

“Great thanks. Come on, come on.” Harry said all but shoving him out the door into the cold evening air. Once outside Harry took his hand and ran practically dragging him behind him. “Hermione is distracting Ginny and I convinced the twins to play a prank on Ron. I need you.”

Sirius blushed as they ran down through the snow until the burrow was just lights in the distance. Harry pulled him to a more protected portion of the grounds by some trees. He put up some warming spells and a notice me not. Sirius gasped in semi fake scolding voice said, “Under age magic Harry. Oh the shame, I’m dating a criminal.”

“And I’m dating a motorcycle riding, leather jacket wearing little cutie.” Harry said grabbing him around the waist kissing him hungrily.

“I’m not cute! Why can’t I be manly or tough?” Sirius complained between kisses.

“Sirius,” Harry said pulling back. “You are cute. You are so cute it’s practically painful. You have flour on your face and are wearing an apron. Now, let. Me. Kiss you.”

Sirius blushed as Harry kissed him again he gasped as a hand found his backside. They stumbled backwards until Sirius got caught on a snow mound at which point Harry landed on him. He dug his palms into Harry wanting him off, Harry laughed rolling them over. Immediately he was back to kissing Sirius, his hands wandering everywhere.

“Harry I’m cold.” Sirius complained as Harry’s hand played with the top of his pants.

“I’ll refresh the warming charm. I probably did a shoddy job. Too excited.” Harry said chuckling.

“Spike’s cold.” Sirius added rubbing his friend who was curled up tight by his ear. “Harry they’re probably worried about us running out into the snow and night like that.”

“Fine.” Harry agreed siting up adjusting himself. “Sirius, I want to tell people about us. I don’t like sneaking around with you. I want people to know that I have you as my cute sexy little boyfriend. I want people to know we’re dating. I love you, I want the world to know.”

“Harry- I don’t want to be your pet or-”

“I’ll hex them.” Harry said taking his hand rubbing his burn scar. “Anyone that says anything bad to you I’ll hex them.”

“You won’t always be there…” Sirius said. “Harry I don’t know I want to think about it more…”

“That’s fine.” Harry agreed. “But until then can I tell Ron? Just Ron. Please he’s my best mate and Hermione already knows.”

“Alright... That seems fair.” Sirius said earning a kiss. He was pulled to his feet as they walked back faces flushed from the cold.

The next night Harry took Ron for a walk, stating he needed time with his best friend. He was nervous about Harry telling Ron, he figured he would be ok with them being together. He really did but he had started pacing all the same. Maybe he’d think it was weird because of his age. Or because he was a squib. Or even because they were both guys. He paced harder when Mrs. Weasley approached him she watched him a moment next to Hermione as she read.

“Sirius sweetie are you alright?” She asked concerned.

“I’m just pacing.” He muttered wishing he could stress break.

“I can see that.” She said softly. He missed Hermione whisper to her, to focused on the jittery feeling in his hands. She looked up at him smiling, “Has Remus taught you any new recipes lately? I’d love it if you made me something sweet to nibble on if you have time.”

His eyes lit up stopping pacing to look at her. “I can I bake?”

She chuckled smiling, “Of course deary.”

She moved aside letting him go to the kitchen as she walked away satisfied. Hermione followed him in bringing her book. Hermione smiled over it at him, “What are you going to bake?”

“My- err… papa Remus taught me a recipe for-”

“Papa Remus?” Ginny asked walking in. “You’re calling them papa and what dad, daddy? Aren’t you older then them? That’s so creepy.”

“Ginny!” Hermione snapped. “There’s nothing wrong with it. They adopted him. They’re his parents.”

Ginny shrugged. “It’s still weird.”

Sirius grit his teeth, gathering things “It’s not weird. They-”

“Where’s Harry?”

“I’m sorry Sirius what was the recipe for?” Hermione said ignoring her.

Ginny scoffed leaving the room as Sirius told her about the chocolate cherry cookies. He soon was quite content working and talking to her as Spike stretched out over most his back. The door opened letting Ron and Harry in, he couldn’t bring himself to look at them. What if Ron thought like Ginny did about him? He stretched up on his toes trying to reach the flour.

“Here mate.” Ron said pulling the item down. “How much do you need?”

Sirius stared at him before answering. Ron nodded measuring out the three cups, he poured them into Sirius’s bowl carefully. He and Sirius worked in relative silence until Ron tried to use magic to mix. Sirius pulled his bowl close, “No magic on my cookies!”

“Blimmy sorry.” Ron said handing him a spoon. “Shall I chop the cherries?”

“Yes please.” Sirius said.

“Can I mix?” Harry asked joining. “By hand I promise.”

In the end all four of them made the cookies which was completely unnecessary but it was fun. That night however was different, he walked into Ron’s room with Harry and didn’t see his bed. He glanced at Harry nervously only to see Harry looking at his enlarged bed.

Harry cleared his throat, “Ron what happened to our beds?”

“Bloody hell isn’t it obvious? I’m bad at transfiguration but not so bad you can’t see I transfigured them into a bigger bed.” He said scrunching down under his covers. “You sleep together in Gryffindor. And now I know it’s not just because of ‘nightmares’ or you were ‘too tired to make a bed’.”

“Thanks Ron.” Harry said smiling.

Ron shrugged, “I just better not wake up to you two snogging.”

“Of course.” Sirius said while Harry said, “No promises.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah they are both idiots that thought the other was going to break up with them. As Hermione said. "Men!" But hey they pulled it together. :)  
> Severus and Remus are preparing for dark times and protecting their son.  
> Please let me know what you think.


	25. Chapter 25

Remus was relieved to be back at Hogwarts with his husband and with his son after Christmas. Sirius had been thrilled to see them too, and at long last Remus was settling down for the night with Severus. Alas a parent’s work is never done, he grunted feeling Sirius’s weight get thrown on him and his husband. He sighed softly smiling putting his book down giving him their full attention as Sirius stared mournfully up at them. “Something you need love?”

“I need to talk to you.” Sirius said moving to sit cross legged on their bed, Spike dropping from his ear to curl in his lap getting pats. “Harry wants to tell people we’re dating, but I’m afraid of how people will treat me.”

“Oh Sirius just explain to him why-”

“Hold on.” Severus said sharply. “If you tell people you’re dating that gives us motive to ‘kill’ you.”

“What?” Remus said as Sirius made a ‘huh’ noise.

“No really we have no motive to ‘kill’ Sirius. The Dark Lord wants us to experiment on him we were going to try to make up a reason but this could be a real reason.”

“To hurt Harry.” Remus concluded. “Severus that’s brilliant. Nobody would suspect it!”

“Exactly.” Severus said as Sirius looked annoyed. “I know you don’t like it. However it’s our best option. You tell us immediately if someone treats you wrong.”

“Besides,” Remus said trying to make his pup feel better. “You’re very happy with Harry, wouldn’t it make you happier to be able to hold his hand in public. Hmm?”

“Alright. But I don’t like it.” Sirius said staring daggers at their quilt. Remus reached out holding his hand rubbing his thumb along a scar. “It’s going to really hurt Harry when you ‘kill’ me.”

“It’s for the greater good.” Remus said feeling ill as he said these words, Sirius nodded.

**********

“Harry can we talk about what you asked over Christmas?” Sirius said sitting with him, Harry looked up hopefully nodding from his dinner.

“Of course Sirius.”

“I- I think we should tell people about us...” He said.

“Really!? Sirius that’s great I’m so happy.” Harry said smiling at him.

“Yeah… Where are Ron and Hermione?”

“Ron’s probably snogging with Lavender in the common room and Hermione grabbed a sandwich and ran. She’s been having trouble in potions lately.”

“Oh she should have told me. I can’t make potions but Severus umm dad- no that’s weird.” He grew quiet trying to figure out what to call him.

“Still trying to wrap your head around the whole parent’s thing?” Harry asked kindly leaning into him.

Sirius nodded. “They said I could call them whatever makes me happy. But it’s such a habit to call them by their names. But I feel like I should give some form of ‘dad’ a try. I mean I once called them daddy and papa but that was to piss off Lockhart because he kept flirting with-”

“Hi Harry.” Ginny interrupted as she came up with other quidditch players. They crowded around them sitting as Ginny tried to wedge between Harry and Sirius, she got her foot through and was trying to sit pushing into Sirius. Sirius was not having it and planted himself tighter. “Sirius can you move over? We need to talk quidditch with Harry.”

“No, I’m sitting here.” He said firmly as she scowled.

“There’s room beside you Sirius. Just move over.” Ginny said. “We’re part of the team we need to be together. I don’t want to talk around you.”

“Ginny stop.” Harry said firmly making her pause. “Sirius please scoot over.”

Sirius glared at him doing as he was asked, Ginny tried to sit between them but Harry scooted over too staying next to Sirius. She smiled happily sitting down next to Harry as Harry subtly wrapped a hand around Sirius’s upper thigh massaging the muscle. They lost Sirius somewhere in all the quidditch chatter, Harry kept trying to include him but it was truly a lost cause. When dinner was over him, Harry and Ginny were walking to Gryffindor when they ran into McGonagall.

“Ahh Mr. Potter, I need but a moment of your time.” She said smiling kindly.

“Of course. Bye Ginny. Sirius see you in a minute.” He said following her.

They walked in an awkward silence barely entering the Gryffindor common room when Ginny rounded on him. “What’s your deal?” He looked at her startled. “I get that you’re a bit _slow_ but stop hanging on Harry.”

“I’m not slow. Why would you say that?” Sirius snapped hurt, getting people’s attention. “I don’t hang on him.”

“Yes you do it’s weird you’re not a little kid anymore. Look I’ll spell it out for you. I like Harry and you’re making it very hard to flirt with him. I-”

“It’s not weird! Stop saying that I’m weird-”

“Don’t interrupt me!” She snapped. Hermione started to walk over bristling, a confused Ron and Lavender even stopped snogging.

“Ginny?” Ron asked approaching holding Lavender’s hand.

“Ginny you better knock it off.” Hermione demanded standing by Sirius.

“Ron back me up. You know how I feel about Harry.” Ginny said.

Ron cleared his throat awkwardly ready to speak but Lavender spoke first. “Oh Ginny you and Harry would make an adorable couple!”

“Thank you.” Ginny said smiling, she turned to Sirius talking softer like he was dense. “Sirius I’m telling you this as a friend sometimes it feels like you’re flirting with him. And that’s wrong.”

Sirius’s eyes widened. “Because I’m a guy?”

“Merlin no!” Ginny snapped, “Because you’re like thirty-four.”

“Ginny that’s not how it works he’s physically seventeen. The same as us.” Hermione snapped as Lavender looked startled. Sirius blanched no one else had a problem with his age.

“Ginny that’s not fair. It’s not his fault he was stunted.” Ron said, “Come on just let it go. Believe me you’re going to want to.”

“Let what go?” Harry asked coming through the portrait he wrapped an arm over his shoulders in the split second Sirius took to look at him Harry kissed him on the lips. Ginny made a stuttering noise at this while Lavender looked shocked.

“Harry!” Sirius whined.

“What you said we could tell people.” Harry said smiling in blissful stupidity.

“I- I didn’t think you would just- kiss me!” Sirius stuttered horrified.

“How else was I supposed to tell people?” Harry asked confused.

“Men.” Hermione hissed under her breath.

“Oh my Merlin. You two are dating?” Lavender asked collapsing her hands together as Harry nodded enthusiastically. “That’s so cute. Wait till Pavati hears!”

“You’re dating?” Ginny said a dumbfounded look on her face. “I- I have to go.”

She walked away upstairs still in shock. Others learned about their relationship too as it was very hot gossip and it got mixed reactions. Some people like Neville where happy for them other people like Malfoy thought it was disgusting. Unfortunately he had to hear Harry defend his choice in dating a squib a bit more then he would have liked.

It was a few days later when Sirius was cornered by Ginny. Or more correctly he was grabbed by the back of his leather jacket and dragged into an empty classroom. He had been so startled he hadn’t fought back cursing himself for his ingrained submissive nature.

“It’s wrong that you’re dating Harry.” She said bluntly. “I won’t stand for it.”

“Tough.” Sirius growled crossing his arms really annoyed with her. “You don’t have any right to tell me what to do.”

Her face turned red at this, “Are you listening, it’s wrong that you’re dating him. It’s weird and strange. He should be with someone more like him.”

“You mean someone like you.” Sirius said cross.

“Obviously.”

“Well he wants me. We love each other.”

“He probably only said that to get in your pants!” She snapped, Sirius cheeks burned at this. “Well I guess it worked by the look on your face. I knew you were _easy_.” She pushed past him shouldering him muttering. “I hope you didn’t give him any diseases.”

Sirius didn’t react until she left, he sunk down to the floor. Spike crawled into his lap as he willed back tears. He rubbed Spike’s head bitter but thankful for the company. He just didn’t understand why people were so cruel. What was so wrong with him? He eventually broke down crying it just hurt so bad what she said.

**********

“Sirius.” He turned around seeing Harry dragging a loopy looking Ron behind him. Harry walked up kissing him softly. “Hello handsome fancy seeing you here.”

“Umm hi.” Sirius said still embarrassed by Harry’s love of PDA with him. He was pretty sure Harry liked it so much as a way of sticking it to those that talked down about their relationship. “I was heading to the kitchens to bake-”

“You’re not Romilda.” Ron said suddenly getting in his face disappointed. “I love her.”

“What?” Sirius asked looking to Harry as they started walking.

“He ate cauldron cakes with a love potion on them. They were meant for me.” Harry said.

“Seriously? Why does everyone want my boyfriend?” Sirius moaned getting a gentle shove from Harry.

“Are you jealous?” Harry teased. Sirius shot him an unamused glare, he laughed dragging Ron by the wrist. “I believe that was a Snape level glare. Don’t worry I only have eyes for you. Come on we need to get him to Slughorn.”

“Why not dad Severus?” Sirius asked following Harry on his quest. He got a curious look making him blush at what he said. “I’m trying to wean myself into giving them new names. And before you ask its papa Remus.”

“You’re so cute.” He said knocking on the entrance to his quarters. “I need Slughorn to like me. So I can get that memory. Will you watch Ron so I can talk to him?”

“Harry… Slughorn’s not that nice to me…” Sirius said embarrassed.

“What do you mean?” Harry asked as Slughorn opened his door giving them all a funny look. “Hello sir we could use your help.”

“With what?” He asked curiously.

“Love potion sir a very powerful one.” Harry said gesturing at Ron.

“Are we going to see Romilda?” Ron asked Sirius leaning into him. “You’re hair smells like apples… Do you think Romilda likes apples?”

Sirius tugged him inside as Harry explained the situation thoroughly to Slughorn. Ron wandered around the room in a daze, Sirius followed him trying to keep him from doing something stupid. Ron quickly tried to climb up to the back of the couch snuggling a pillow. Sirius reached out pulling him down and removing the pillow from him when he tried snogging it while Slughorn and Harry talked in the corner as he made an antidote. Ron grabbed Sirius yanking him onto his lap wrapping his arms tight around him.

“Fancy a drink?” Ron asked rubbing his face in Sirius’s cheek as he squirmed.

“Sorry Ron. He’s taken.” Harry said untangling Sirius from his best friend.

“Almost done my boy.” Slughorn said dropping in seven wiggentree twigs.

“It works better to add eight.” Sirius said watching him from his new spot farther from Ron. Slughorn looked at him the way you would a small child telling a fantasy story, with bemused humor.

“Very cute. Harry have you been teaching him?” Slughorn asked completely ignoring Sirius.

He grit his teeth, “No my dad Severus taught me.”

“There’s no point teaching him such things, he can’t use it.” Slughorn said again completely ignoring him as he cast Harry a smile. Harry swallowed up his annoyance watching Slughorn give Ron the antidote. “Drink up my boy. It’s for your nerves.”

Ron came down from his love potion high, horrified with himself. “What happened? Was I trying to snog Sirius?”

“No kissing squibs today my boy.” Slughorn laughed amused pouring three cups of mead, handing one to Harry and another to Ron. Sirius was sure he was invisible to the man.

Harry glared at his cup, “What about Sirius?”

Slughorn chuckled, “Alright he can have a small one too if you insist.”

“I don’t want it.” Sirius growled watching Ron toss his mead back.

“Just as well, it’s a nice quality. He probably wouldn’t appreciate it. This was going to be a gift for Dumbledore but-”

“Ron!” Harry yelled as the teen collapsed foaming at the mouth. “Professor do something he’s been poisoned!”

“I- I don’t understand.” The man mumbled as Sirius ran past him digging through his potions cabinet. “No- no don’t touch. You’ll ruin it.”

“Bezoar. Bezoar.” Sirius mumbled riffling through his stuff he grabbed a box labeled bezoar when he was levitated away. “Harry shove this down his throat!”

Harry caught the stone shoving it in Ron’s mouth as Sirius was levitated to the floor and stuck there with a sticking charm. He writhed about heart speeding up starting to panic, he didn’t want to be held down. Ron came out of it alive but groggy, Slughorn seemed to come to then as well. “Very good job Harry you saved his life.”

“Sirius saved his life.” Harry snapped running now to free his distressed boyfriend pulling him up off the floor. “Not me. Sirius.”

“Well I suppose you’re right…”

“No I am right.” Harry snapped wrapping his arm over Sirius’s shoulders, kissing him on the cheek. Slughorn looked aghast before nodded dumbfounded walking to the floo to call Madam Pomfrey. When his back was turned Harry leaned in, “I don’t care if he’s a teacher. He says one more nasty thing or uses magic on you like that again I’ll blast him across the room.”

They went as a group to the infirmary, where Harry told the story to Pomfrey, McGonagall, Dumbledore and his parents. Sirius would have glossed over parts but Harry very angrily told them about what Slughorn did and said to him. Dumbledore held up his hand, intending to pacify them when Severus rounded on Slughorn. He grabbed the man by the upper arm and ‘kindly’ escorted him out of the room. Remus smiled reaching out giving Sirius’s cheek a quick rub like nothing was wrong before following after them. Sirius dared not ask.

**********

Remus paced the room watching Severus brew potion after potion. They had a rather large collection now of poloyjuice, wolfsbane and tons of fulgorque exspiravit. Remus thought this was insanity, he couldn’t believe they had agreed to this. He looked at his husband determinedly brewing and trying to create a cure for Dumbledore’s curse.

“I still can’t believe we’re doing this.” He said pacing the room. “Hiding Sirius away, I’ve already made an expanding bag fit to house him temporally. Faking his death with potions and trickery. Possibly killing Dumbledore.”

“Oh it’s not possibly.” Severus said. “Unless I can cure him it’s more than likely definitely. A mercy killing at this point. But we’ll be on the inside.”

“They are going to hate us.” Remus said nervously stopping his pacing.

“You can back out. You can curse my name and run away with Sirius.” He said slowly like the words where painful.

“No- No. I won’t leave you. I’ll stand beside you during this. And Sirius will be here too.” Remus said determined. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” Severus said.

**********

Sirius stood by Hagrid and Remus watching the half giant cry mournfully at the death of Aragog. Spike was in his arms draped over his chest allowing Sirius to rub tiny patterns around his spikes as he cooed. Remus was comforting Hagrid patting his back telling him that it would be alright.

“He was a good spider.” Hagrid was saying. Sirius nodded along as Spike perked up making a shrill cry he turned around seeing Harry and Slughorn walking towards them. He bristled at Slughorn as Harry stood next to him giving Spike a pat. Hagrid saw them then, “Harry thank you for coming. Horace.”

“Merlin’s beard is that an acromantula?” Slughorn asked.

“A dead one sir.” Harry said, Sirius shot him a look.

“Harry.” He hissed.

“Sirius.” He hissed back his pupils slightly dilated. Harry seemed to fixate on him now leaning in stroking hair behind his ear, Sirius blushed at this. Harry smirked rather pleasantly at him, Sirius found himself drawn to him leaning in wanting a kiss. Harry grabbed his shoulders glancing back as the three adults talked of Aragog, Slughorn even collecting some venom. “I’m sorry Sirius. You’re distracting me.”

“What?” He asked put off as Spike started climbing to his shoulder.

Harry leaned in whispering, “I took felix felicis, a luck potion, I’m trying to get that memory from Slughorn. But seeing you I just want to well- I want to take you for a nice romp around.”

Sirius was shocked normally Harry being so forward with him was a turn off but wow did he gladly want to go with him now. He blushed at the idea, “I wouldn’t mind a nice romp around.”

“Damn it Sirius.” Harry laughed leaning in making Spike hiss loudly climbing to the stretch across Sirius’s back.

“Merlin,” Slughorn said making them spring apart as he approached. He looked at Sirius in utter bewilderment. “Is that a swooping evil on you?”

“His name’s Spike.” Sirius said expecting to be ignored however Slughorn nodded fascinated.

“My boy may I have- if it’s not too much trouble could I get some of it’s venom?” He asked pulling a vile out hopefully.

Sirius glared at him, but Harry spoke first. “Sir this is a funeral not an apothecary.”

“Quiet right Harry. How rude of me.” He turned back to Hagrid. “Would you like me to say a few words?”

Hagrid nodded and they listened to Slughorn give a tiny but nice speech about Aragog. Once it was over Remus spelled him into the grave and buried him, then they went into Hagrid’s hut to have drinks. Sirius noticed Harry working carefully barely drinking and spelling Slughorn, Remus and Hagrid’s cups full again and again. Spike had curled back up cocooned acting as an earring as he listened to Harry talk of his parents which in turn egged Remus on to talk of them too. Suddenly he found himself talking about James and Lily as well, even Hagrid joining in. Slowly and sadly Slughorn removed a memory giving it to Harry stating he was not proud of what was inside.

“Thank you sir I have to go though it’s getting late.” Harry said, they agreed all walking back as a group. Slughorn went one way and Remus a little drunkenly swayed as he walked ahead of them. Sirius himself seemed to be feeling the drinks now, feeling bold he looked at Harry walking up to him wrapping arms around him pleased. “Sirius, I need to see Dumbledore. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“I thought you wanted to romp around with me?” Sirius asked.

“I would love to.” Harry said glancing over his shoulder at Remus. 

“Don’t worry about him he’s fine.” Sirius said pushing into him kissing him fiercely. “Come on here in the green house, your dorm or all the way to the room of requirements?”

Harry pulled him back, “Sirius, I think the felix felicis I took is somehow affecting you. I don’t want to take advantage of you.”

“Harry.” He whined again trying to kiss him. Sirius wanted him, he wanted him bad. He was so kind, so smart and so caring that he would worry about his mental state. He leaned in again panting, “Please, I want you inside me.”

Harry turned pink at this, “Oh Merlin. Sirius, you don’t talk like this. I need to go, how about you wait in the room of requirements for me and if you feel the same way when the potion wears off then we can ‘romp around’.”

“I can’t get into the room without you.” Sirius said disappointed.

“Then go to Gryffindor, there’s still time before curfew. I’ll see you in a bit. Love you.” Harry said kissing him goodbye. Sirius did go to Gryffindor and he came down from his high from being around Harry, he was both ashamed and horrified with himself for how he acted. However that did not stop him from enjoying a romp around with Harry anyway.

**********

He had heard about the bathroom incident from both Harry and Severus. Harry was mad at himself and deeply ashamed that he had cast such a curse at Draco. Severus was beside himself since that was his curse, he created it to appeal to the Dark Lord years ago when he was going to start spying. He was so mad he had given Harry detention every Saturday for the rest of the year and no amount of ‘puppy eyes’ from Sirius was getting him out of it.

Gryffindor still managed to win the quidditch game and the championship without Harry though. Sirius stood with Hermione as the whole common room celebrated, drinks flowing, music playing and people cheering. Ginny was in the center of it all having been the one to catch the snitch, Ron right beside her having a grand time. Hermione chuckled watching Ron attempt to dance with the rest of the team. He heard people start cheering Harry’s name as he entered the room across from him. They locked eyes and Harry started towards him smiling.

“Harry we won!” Ron yelled excited.

“Harry it’s true I caught the snitch!” Ginny yelled running up and throwing her arms around him kissing him on the lips. Sirius felt himself jerk, Hermione beside him horrified.

“Get off!” Harry snapped shoving her hard, making the room calm down murmuring. “Ginny what the bloody hell?”

“Harry I love you.” Ginny said quickly, “I think we belong together.”

“Ginny no.” Harry said firmly as Sirius, Hermione and Ron joined him. “I’ve been telling you and telling you I’m with Sirius.”

“You shouldn’t be with someone like him!” She snapped, Sirius wondered if it was ok to hit a girl as she pointed at him. “Look at him! He’s not like us!”

“You know that’s the same as saying he couldn’t be with a muggle don’t you?” Hermione questioned as Harry looked like he was holding back a verbal tirade.

“Come on Ginny I think you’ve had too much to drink.” Ron said trying to calm his sister.

“Stay out of this Ron.” She growled, “And it’s not the same! He’s a dirty slut and he’s ruining everything!”

She drew back her hand slapping Sirius hard across the face, jarring Spike from the motion. There was a collective gasp as nobody was sure what to do. Sirius held his stinging face, a part of him felt conditioned to want to be submissive but another part wanted to slap her back. He felt Harry grab him moving into a protective stance as Ron grabbed his sister. Hermione meanwhile let out a barrage of verbal abuse at her till Harry grabbed her shoulder calming her.

“Ginny, stay the hell away from me.” Harry said bluntly, “Don’t come near me or Sirius ever again. Don’t touch him or me ever again.”

“But Harry-”

“No. Ginny, just no.” Harry said wrapping his arm around Sirius pulling him in close. “You literally just assaulted my boyfriend.”

“He shouldn’t be your boyfriend. It’s wrong!” She snapped getting free of Ron she got in Harry’s face. “You should be with me.”

Sirius let out a tiny whistle, Spike whipped around lunging at Ginny. She screamed as Sirius held his tail making the girl stumble backwards crashing to the floor. He smirked at her giving another whistle Spike calmed down choosing to crawl to Sirius’s back hissing at her over his shoulder.

“Leave us alone.” He said bored arms crossed rubbing his cheek on Spike’s head. She stumbled to her feet huffing before fleeing the room.

“Bloody hell, she’s gone mental.” Ron grumbled, “I’ll talk to mum about her, she needs help. I’m so sorry mates.”

“Thanks Ron. And thank you for protecting me.” Harry said pulling Sirius in for a kiss surprising him. “I love you.”

Sirius smiled, “I love you too.”

**********

Sirius looked up as Severus opened the door to their quarters letting Dumbledore in, the two men shared a look as Remus entered from the bedroom. Sirius tried to subtly listen to them as they talked but he heard nothing, a silencing charm no doubt trying to hide things from him. He glared harder at his sketch, as Spike clung to his chest.

He looked up feeling the couch dip. Sirius pulled his legs in sitting picnic style placing his sketch pad down. Remus sat next to him his face stern he reached out placing a hand on his knee. His mouth was moving but Sirius couldn’t hear him.

“I can’t hear you. Silencing charm.” He must have said it louder than intended as Remus flinched as he spoke.

He cast a heated looked at Dumbledore before waving his hand cancelling the spell. “Sorry. Dumbledore is narrowing in on a Horcrux. He’s going to take Harry to look for it. When they find it we fear the war will be in full swing. So we need to be ready. Do you understand?”

“I do.” Sirius said looking down brows furrowed. He leaned in whispering, “Please papa Remus I want to tell Harry. I don’t want him to get hurt. He’s going to be a wreck I feel terrible tricking him like this. He deserves to know.”

Remus smiled sadly squeezing his knee, he spoke voice lowered. “I understand your fears but you’ll put us at risk. Harry is a good man, he’ll understand and forgive you.” Sirius didn’t feel convinced, Remus leaned over kissing his head. “Be ready to go at a moment’s notice. Can you give us some space? I don’t want him to use magic on you again.”

Sirius nodded heading to his room, Spike’s claws dug into his shirt as he walked. He stared at nothing in his room as he closed the door. This was wrong he had to tell Harry. He looked at his sketch, Regulus’s dog animagi stared back, he ripped it out flipping it over. He grabbed a quill and began to write.

‘Harry- I’m sorry I couldn’t tell you in person but it was safer for my parents this way. It’s not true, they didn’t kill me. I’m alive. They love me and are trying to protect me from the war.’

Sirius paused tapping the quill to his face. He didn’t want to go into too much details, he couldn’t have someone else see his letter. He continued writing, ‘I can’t explain now. But I promise I will. Just know they are on your side. I love you. – Sirius’.

He read it over nodding approval. He folded it up, he would give it to him in person. He stuck the letter in an envelope writing Harry’s name on it as a knock on his door sounded. “Come in.”

“Hello Sirius.” He whirled around surprised envelope in hand as Dumbledore walked up to him. Remus and Severus stood in the doorway behind him watching him cautiously. The old wizard glanced down at the envelope before looking Sirius square in the eye. “Writing notes to Harry?”

“It’s a drawing of Reggie’s animagi form.”

“Oh may I see?” He asked reaching towards him.

“No!” Sirius cried pulling back, Dumbledore continued to look at him it was becoming unnerving. “It’s- it’s got a love note on the back.” Sirius stuttered out. “It’s embarrassing.”

“Ahh, young love. So sweet and innocent.” He said chuckling, Sirius nodded sticking the envelope in his pocket. “Anyways I just wanted to tell you myself how brave you are being my boy. Great wizards would falter at such a feat that you a squib are willingly diving into.”

Sirius stared at him, it seemed like a back handed compliment. He looked down unsure what to say, “Umm… thanks I think.”

A hand landed heavily on his shoulder. “It’s all for the greater good. Sacrifices must be made.”

**********

“I want to take you out.” Sirius said hands behind his back smiling wide at Harry.

Harry looked at him curious, “Really, I normally take you out.”

“But I’m a guy too. I want to spoil you.” Sirius said trying to keep the sadness from his voice, he knew their time together was ending. Dumbledore had told Severus he would take Harry to hunt a horcrux soon and feared the war would truly begin once it was found. He wanted to get one last good memory, before they were separated. Harry smiled at him blissfully nodding agreement.

Sirius led the way only grabbing Harry’s hand when he started to walk to Hogsmeade, “I was thinking we ride.”

Harry raised his brow at him curiously as Sirius brought him to his motorcycle climbing on. “Where should I sit?”

“Behind me.” Sirius said as Harry climbed on wrapping his hands around his chest. “Hold tight Hagrid says I drive like a knight bus.”

Harry’s arms tightened as he kicked the bike to life, he gave a whistle Spike springing off to fly beside them. He revved the engine and did a burn out as the bike sped along. Harry clutched him tight as he flipped the switch making the bike take to the air, leaving a trail of flames.

“Bloody hell!” Harry yelled pressing his face into Sirius’s shoulder. “Sirius this bike is amazing!”

“It was Reggie’s!” He yelled back. He had to admit he showed off, flying them around having fun, laughing. Spike chasing after them as they did loops. Finally he pulled the bike around shooting it off towards Hogsmeade. He landed it wheels squealing outside Skarmoy’s where they had their first date. “Italian?”

“Would love it.” Harry said climbing off hair frazzled. Sirius activated the lock that would only deactivate for him before taking Harry’s hand. He sort of recreated their whole first date, only reversed. He paid, he made the point of buying Harry chocolates and instead of sugar quills they walked with ice creams. They flew back to the castle and walked in holding hands.

“Sirius, this was really nice.” Harry said thumb running over his burn mark. “Thank you.”

“It gets better.” Sirius said leaning in to whisper in his ear blushing. “I was thinking you could give me a broom ride.”

“Really but we just rode your motorcycle aren’t you tired of flying.” Harry asked as they walked.

Sirius gave him a dumbfounded look, “Harry… I meant the broomstick between your legs…”

“Oh… Oh!” Harry said in realization, he tugged him along quickly practically running.

Harry paced in front of the room of requirements giddily. When the door opened it revealed a beautiful red velvety bed in the middle of the room with a fireplace, candles and mirrors surrounding it. Sirius jaw opened as he was ushered in by a smiling Harry. He looked at Sirius embarrassed. “Too much?”

“I’m just glad there’s no petals on the bed.” Sirius said pulling out his letter. “Umm… Harry before we get into it. I have something for you. You need to promise me you won’t open it. Not till you miss me most, when we can’t see each other.”

“Sirius, the summer won’t be so bad.” Harry said smiling blissfully unaware.

“Please Harry. Please promise me.” He said desperately trying to will him to understand.

“Sirius.” Harry said taking the letter, “I promise on my magic not to open this letter until the summer.”

“Thank you.” He said kissing Harry. “Keep it safe.”

“I will.” Harry said tucking it carefully into his pocket.

Sirius nodded turning away stripping slowly. He glanced at Harry seeing him undressing too, he breathed deeply. He had so much he wanted to say to him. He felt horrible knowing what he had planned to do, how he would hurt Harry. How he would hurt his friends. He bit his lip. He didn’t want to think about it. He just wanted to give Harry the best night he could before he lost him.

“Harry.” He said gently getting his attention. “I really love you. I want you to know that. I really- really love you. You make me feel safe. And like I am someone important. Like I’m worth something.”

“Sirius.” Harry said smiling at him hugging him tenderly. “You’re worth everything.”

Sirius smiled into the hug feeling his heart break. He didn’t want to leave him. He swallowed tightly, reminding himself they’d be together again. He kissed him, Harry kissed back. They backed up till Sirius’s knees hit the bed and they fell down Harry on top of him. He didn’t panic and didn’t push him away. He knew in his heart Harry would never hold him down and hurt or force himself on him.

He felt a hand traveling low as they kissed, a spell murmured against his lips and slicked fingers entered him slowly one at a time. He moaned into Harry as he moved them back and forth, fingers opening and closing, gently working him. A third finger slid in making him breath heavy as they moved curling inside him. He reached down fumbling to grab Harry’s erection stroking him together with his, Harry made a pleased noise at this moving between his legs.

He pumped his fingers a little harder making Sirius break the kiss to gasp. He looked at Harry as he looked back at him lovingly, it was a wonderful feeling. Harry leaned back out of Sirius’s reach watching himself remove his fingers all the way before pushing back in slowly, Sirius blushed at this as Harry watched fascinated.

“Damn it Harry.” He groaned Harry smirked at him beginning to position himself still wiggling his fingers about. He glanced at Sirius waiting for the go ahead. Sirius nodded as the fingers where removed and Harry’s member pushed in. He was gasping as he sunk in full hilt peppering his face with kisses.

“Oh Sirius…” Harry moaned kissing him greedily his hips rocking.

Sirius wrapped his arms and legs around him needing to be close to him. He didn’t want this to end. Harry grabbed one leg prying it free pushing it up towards his chest managing to sink in deeper during his thrusts making Sirius pant needy. Encouraged he removed his other leg pushing it up as well folding him in half as he pumped into him. He bent him a little too far making him hiss in pain eyes widening.

“Are you alright?” He asked backing off, Merlin Sirius loved him.

“I’m fine. I love you Harry.” He said as Harry began to move again.

“I love you too.” He said kissing him grabbing Sirius’s forgotten member stroking it in time with his thrusts. Sirius swore head twisting away from Harry panting heavily as his lover nibbled and sucked his neck.

“I’m gonna-”

“Do it.” Harry demanded moving his angle the slightest bit making Sirius see stars. He felt himself clenching around Harry feeling him more as his climax hit. Sticky white landed on his chest but he didn’t care, feeling Harry speed up before stilling breathing deeply, he felt the warmth spreading in him. Harry flopped on him. “Merlin that was amazing. I love you.”

“I love you too.” Sirius said running his hands up and down Harry’s back as the teen laid on him still inside him. He gave Harry sloppy kisses and wished this moment wouldn’t stop. He cursed knowing it would be over soon, he hated this war and it truly felt like the worst times were coming. Don’t think about it he reminded himself as Harry turned kissing him. He held back his tears, don’t think about it, they were together now and that’s what mattered. He wrapped himself tightly around Harry needing to be as close as humanly possible. It’s not the end he reminded himself they’d be together… eventually.

**********

Remus nibbled his nails looking at Sirius he stared back nervously. It was happening. It was happening now. It felt all too soon. He barely felt ready, Severus had felt his arm sting and had bolted from the room. Remus and Sirius had followed him, the Dark Mark was shining from the top of the tower. Remus looked at him his heart clenching, he opened the expanding bag and Sirius climbed in with only a hug before he disappeared into his new home. He put the bag on his back summoning Dobby. He stared at him as he handed him the potion, he nodded.

“One more time Dobby, drink the potion. Be Sirius, tell me off, run. I throw a silent blinding light spell. You disappear. And we never speak of this again.” Remus said arms shaking. “It’s for the greater- It’s for Sirius!”

“For Sirius.” He agreed drinking the polyjuice potion, he watched him morph into Sirius. He transfigured his clothes quickly taking his shaking hand he dragged him towards the astronomy tower. He gasped heart still seeing Dumbledore’s body fall from the window. It had happened. He cursed holding back tears as Dobby trembled terrified behind him.

Bellatrix ran from the tower laughing hysterically, with a few other Death Eaters. Severus came out shoving Draco along, he caught Remus’s eye, and Remus nodded raising his bag the tiniest bit.

“Are you coming!?” Bellatrix laughed, blasting a curse off at Hagrid’s hut. He hurried dragging Dobby towards them. “Oh you’re bringing your pet.”

“Of course.” Remus said feeling the words stick in his throat. “We can use him for potions experiments.”

She laughed as they heard Harry screaming. “Snape! Snape! He trusted you! Sirius!? Let him go! Please let him go!”

Remus swallowed hard looking at Dobby with Sirius’s eyes, he mouthed ‘now’ at him, he nodded pulling away. “Sirius will not go with you!”

“Yes you will!” Remus growled signaling him with his eyes to run. He could see him tremble but he did as he was told. “Don’t you run away from me!”

He hated himself, he threw the blinding curse. He saw the horror on Harry’s face, and felt the sickness in his throat as the light flashed and faded and ‘Sirius’ was gone. It was fake he knew it, but the simple idea of ‘killing’ his Sirius was horrible. He shook violently before steeling himself, running a hand over the bag’s strap holding the real Sirius safe inside.

“No! No! You monster!” Harry screamed, “You sick monster Lupin! I’ll kill you!”

Harry raised his wand but Severus stupefied him throwing him back. Bellatrix laughed hysterically sending waves of fire from her wand. Remus joined Severus looking at him, delicately Severus touched the bag before they followed the other Death Eaters away from the castle.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Longer chapter this time but I didn't want to separate all the 'fun'. Plan is in motion and things are happening.  
> Also rereading this wow Ginny was mean. Ron's right she needs help. :(
> 
> Please tell me what you think! <3


	26. Chapter 26

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Only updating on Tuesday and Friday now.

It was madness what followed after they fled Hogwarts, Voldemort celebrated Dumbledore’s death granting Severus whatever he desired. Severus told him Hogwarts and the Dark Lord agreed, he wanted Hogwarts to save the students. Remus swallowed hard as Severus talked up letting Moony roam the school on the full moons scaring children and using Remus as a threat. He hated it but nodded along eagerly. He acted as though it was the greatest idea ever, which made Greyback laugh saying he was just like him. He felt sick.

He was worried about push back from ‘killing’ Sirius and at first the Drak Lord was mad, saying they had freed- Barrick specifically to give Sirius to him. He wanted to vomit. He was sure he would be crucioed for this, he was worried Sirius would feel it in the expanding bag. However Severus pointed out the pain it brought Harry, Voldemort had laughed cruelly and replayed the memory from Severus a few times over. He saw the way it wrecked his husband seeing the memory over and over, fake or not it was painful for them. He was their son.

Then came the new horrible news the Dark Lord wanted them to let John Barrick into their home. He wanted Barrick to scour through Sirius’s stuff for anything ‘usable’. Remus had blanched at the idea of letting that man touch his pups things, he also didn’t want him near him even hidden. Severus had taken the ‘bag’ with Sirius for a visit to the Malfoy’s while Remus glared daggers at Barrick. He had said vile things about his child that had Remus gritting his teeth. In the end he left with Sirius’s hairbrush, toothbrush and some dirty clothes. Remus hated him and had deep cleaned his room after he left.

Home was horrible, they dared not let Sirius out unless absolutely sure they were not going to be disturbed. Which in turn was torture on Sirius who slowly was not handling being ‘locked up’, his poor pup thought he could stand it but he couldn’t. He didn’t like the bag after a few days, he would cower from it holding Spike close like a shield when he saw it. So they came to an agreement, thus his son basically lived in their newly enchanted and warded closet. They didn’t want him sleeping away from them at night either in case they had unexpected visitors, Death Eater or Order members.

Soon they had returned to Hogwarts early, since the Death Eaters frequented their house and it was hard to keep Sirius hidden. It was safer at Hogwarts for Sirius he could roam their quarters safely. However McGonagall and the other staff that where at the school over the summer looked at Severus and him with disdain. They hated them pure and simple, even Slughorn who did not care for Sirius looked at Remus like he was garbage.

They could not keep Sirius locked up forever. He was free to roam their quarters but if he wanted to leave he would either Polyjuice to look like them or they used fulgorque exspiravit. The potion was simple, it would give Sirius the iridescent sheen of a ghost along with making him partly see through. However he was very much solid and could not float or pass through walls but Dipsey and Dobby were easy to summon to move him about. Spike would follow him swooping around Sirius protectively. The first time ‘ghost’ Sirius walked into the great hall he thought Minerva would faint.

**********

Sirius had heard from Remus and Severus that Harry was to be moved tonight, they were to go and try to ‘stop’ him along with other Death Eaters they refused to tell him more. So Sirius had grabbed a few potions and gone to see Hagrid.

“Hagrid?” Sirius called from the other side of the door. “Can you let me in?”

Hagrid opened the door staring at the iridescent man sadly. “Come in Sirius.”

“Hagrid, I was spying on Remus and Severus. The Death Eaters are going to try to attack Harry tonight. Are you going?” He asked standing by the newly opened door as Spike found a spot on a chair back. He felt terrible he made Hagrid so uncomfortable in this form the half giant nearly knocked his chair over trying to sit.

“Oh Sirius I was worried they’d figure it out.” He said nervously watching him checking the scones he was cooking. “I am going. We’re going to take him safely to the Tonks parents’ house while decoys go elsewhere. I’m the one taking Harry. I shouldn’t have said that.”

Sirius’s eyes lit up, he had to see Harry. “Have some tea Hagrid it will calm your nerves. How will you get there?”

“Why your bike of course.” He said boiling some tea.

“Where is it? Maybe I could visit?” Sirius said innocently.

Hagrid told him the address picking out a tea too steep as he trembled looking at him. He really did feel bad that this form made Hagrid so uncomfortable. He poured his tea and went to sit, “He’s going to the Burrow after, might be easier to ghost on over and see him there. I’m sorry I shouldn’t have said that.”

“It’s fine.” He said quickly walking to stand close to him just out of reach. “Hagrid I think your scones are burning.”

He turned around tending to them as Sirius quickly poured a sleeping potion in Hagrid’s mug. He hid the bottle and backed away watching Hagrid eat his scone and drink his tea. He yawned at Sirius, “Blimmy I’m tired.”

“Can you rest before you go?”

“No… No… I need to… go… now…” He fell asleep where he sat. Sirius swallowed hard, hoping he didn’t over dose him.

“Dipsey.” He hissed yanking free some of Hagrid’s hair dropping it into one of his polyjuice potions. The elf appeared in a pop looking at him curious. “I’m leaving the castle. Please watch Hagrid, I gave him a sleeping potion and I need him not to wake up until I’m back.”

“Alright Sirius sir.” She nodded covering her eyes as he stripped, “Dipsey will care for your clothes as well sir.”

“Thank you Dipsey.” He said drinking the potion. “Merlin that tastes like piss.”

Growing to be the size of Hagrid was very alarming, he looked down at himself and shuddered as Dipsey handed him some of Hagrid’s clothes. His parents where going to kill him for this he thought dressing quickly. He looked at the elf. “How do I look?”

“Like Hagrid, Sirius sir.” She said hopping excited.

“Brilliant.” He said giving a whistle Spike swooped over giving him a funky look before landing in his hands. “Sorry Spike I don’t want you to get hurt you be good for Dipsey, and don’t eat her brain. Bye Dipsey. …I should try to sound like Hagrid… Best be off Dipsey.”

She giggled at him. “Sir is funny. Remember not to kiss sirs boyfriend you will give him a heart attack.”

Sirius nodded at her. He walked outside and got on the bike. Hagrid’s body was a lot bigger but he managed to get riding the bike down in this form as well as he did in his form. He was incredibly scared but also excited. He felt like the ride was over way to soon, he figured his nerves where just shot. He landed down outside the Dursley’s house he sipped his polyjuice once more. Chanel Hagrid, he told himself walking up stopping short of hugging Hermione like usual. She looked at him and he smiled at her.

He nearly hit his head on the door frame as they walked in as a group with Moody, Tonks and other order members and Fred and George. His heart sped up seeing Harry, he racked his brain wondering if it would be odd to hug him. Harry hugged Ron and Hermione before looking at them all.

“Ello Harry.” He said trying to act like Hagrid, Harry smiled at him.

“Hagrid good to see you.” He said before moving on to great the others. Yep that was weird Sirius thought.

He listened to Moody give his spiel about polyjuice and relay the plan of the Harry’s all flying to throw off the trail. Harry understandably was not happy with this idea. He argued but was shot down, Sirius smiled at him. He was so caring and loving.

“No.” Harry spat again. “I don’t want any more friends to die. I already lost Sirius.”

Sirius jerked at his name, seeing Hermione tear up. He felt terrible that he hurt them so. He guessed Harry hadn’t read his letter yet or was faking it. He wanted to say something to try to figure it out but Moody was talking. “It’s tragic yes. But everyone here is over seventeen they want to be here. They volunteered. Now pipe down and lets go.”

Once they were all transformed and changed they split into groups of two. Sirius sipped his potion once more avoiding Moody’s gaze joining Harry. “Come on Arry, you’re with me.”

“One second Harry I need a word with Hagrid. Go wait outside.” Moody snarled walking up to them sizing him up, Sirius swallowed hard watching everyone leave. The second the door shut Moody rounded on him, “What are you drinking?”

It wasn’t a question more like a demand. Sirius’s teeth chattered, as Moody grabbed the flask giving it a sniff magical eye swiveling to him. He was caught, “Moody you can’t tell anyone! It’s me, Sirius.”

“Sirius is dead!” He snapped, “Who are you?”

“The first time you met me I had a broken collarbone! I told you I fell but my dad threw me down the stairs!” Sirius said quickly backing up, Moody stopped staring at him wide eyed. “Reggie tried to get me to talk to you years later but I was afraid to tell the truth about my life and had a meltdown instead. I had a stuffed stag and I came with James and Reggie. You where there when Remus and Severus became my guardians. You-”

“Sirius… But how?” He asked, “They killed you.”

“It was faked my parents love me. Please I’ll tell you more I promise just not now.” He pleaded.

Moody nodded, “You’re a brave son of bitch Black you know that.” He said thrusting the potion back in his hands. “But a terrible actor. And you owe me one hell of an explanation when this is over.”

“Thank you.” He said brightly.

“Let’s go _Hagrid._ ” He said as Sirius sipped his drink. “And get Harry out, no heroics. And remember constant vigilance!”

“Hold tight Arry.” Sirius said, as he climbed on the bike looking at Harry, Harry looked at him determined from his little side car. Moody started counting them down, he kicked the bike to life. The moment he yelled three, they all took off. He spun the bike’s wheels before launching them down the road, he flipped the switch taking the bike into the sky. He saw Harry white knuckling the side car of the bike. He laughed, the real Hagrid did once say he drove terrible.

It was cloudy, he felt like he was driving into a storm but he knew those where no lightning flashes. He brought the bike into the clouds seeing pure chaos. Brooms flying every direction, curses being thrown. Death Eaters shooting about every which way. He ducked and weaved them around, he had been instructed to get Harry straight to the safe point.

“Hagrid we have to help the others!” Harry yelled trying to wing curses as they flew by.

“Can’t. Moody’s orders.” He said whacking a button making the bike fly faster leaving a trail of flames. He ducked them down gunning it towards their destination, he glanced over his shoulder seeing three Death Eaters behind them. He yanked the bike a hard right swerving under a bridge as Harry shot curses behind them taking out a Death Eater.

“Cover your ears!” He yelled as a Death Eater road up next to them, he reached in his expanding bag uncorking bottled merfolk screams. He couldn’t hear it but Harry hissed in pain and the Death Eater spiraled out of the air covering their ears. “Wicked.”

“Hagrid?” Harry questioned rubbing his ears. “Is that Sirius’s bag?”

“Yeah, handy isn’t it.” He said watching Hedwig circle them like she was about to fight. “Call her in. She’ll get us spotted!”

“Hedwig!” Harry yelled as the owl flew to him, grabbing her he pulled her into the side car. She made a displeased noise at being held. Sirius looked over at the last Death Eater but they flew away. He silently wandered if that was one of his parents.

Thankfully the rest of the ride was uneventful. He landed, downing more of the polyjuice potion. He held his bike tight as he was handed a port key by Tonks’s parents. He nibbled his lip, he couldn’t use port keys, Harry or his parents always had to hold him. He could pull this off, he handed it to Harry grabbing his arm and the bike as Harry held Hedwig. Harry gave him a confused look but port keyed them to the Weasley’s all the same.

He looked at his polyjuice potion it was empty and he couldn’t stay long, the real Hagrid would probably be waking up soon and he had to do something about him. He grabbed Harry pulling him into a bone crushing hug. “I have to go. I’ll see you again.”

“Hagrid,” Harry said as he put him down. “Take Hedwig, I can’t take her where I’m going. Please.”

“Of course Harry.” He said holding out his arm for the owl. He commanded her to go to Hogwarts before flying off on his own, he landed a little ways away calling Dipsey. She apparated them back to Hogwarts where he put the bike away running into the hut as he started shrinking. He ditched Hagrid’s clothes in the laundry dressing quickly he downed a new fulgorque exspiravit getting his iridescent sheen again. Spike threw himself on him excited he was back. He rocked from foot to foot unsure what to do about Hagrid when the door flew open Remus glared at him still in Death Eater robes.

“What did you do?” He asked looking haggard.

“I- Ahh- I-” Sirius stumbled he really hadn’t expected to get caught so quickly, “Shouldn’t you be at a meeting still.”

“I’m not part of the inner circle.” Remus said crossing his arms. “Now why was I hit with bottled merfolk screams from your potions bag?”

“Did I make a good Hagrid?”

“Sirius Black!” Remus yelled making him flinch.

“I’m sorry! I wanted to go for Harry.” Sirius complained.

“That was foolish and reckless. You could have died! Alastor Moody was killed tonight and others where hurt. Sirius I can’t lose you for real.” He chided pulling him into a hug. “I love you and you are very brave but please. Never do that again.”

Sirius sighed hugging him back. “Alright papa.”

Remus nodded releasing him, he looked at Hagrid’s sleeping form. “I suppose I’ll do something about this. I need to borrow some memories but we’ll make it work.”

**********

Hogwarts was terrible they had set to work with Dumbledore’s portrait to guide them. The first thing they did was removing any first years that were muggle born. He knew their letters would have come, that they wouldn’t know. Death Eaters were sent aboard the train to look for Potter and any muggleborns. While dementors and the Carrow twins roamed the school’s halls so they had to intercept them first. Together they had the muggleborns rounded up before they even entered the platform, Severus made it so they wouldn’t be allowed in. They went there together hidden obliviating every family they saw that failed to enter. That was easy, sure the children would be behind or may never make it to Hogwarts but they lived.

Remus couldn’t look at Minerva when Severus announced that muggleborns would no longer be allowed to come to Hogwarts. The pain and disappointment on her face was unbearable. It felt worse when Severus announced him a werewolf and he had to act like the idea of turning unruly children was a wonderful one. He hated it. He hated seeing children afraid of him, of seeing his coworkers scorn him. Madam Pomfrey who he was very close to from her helping him so many years looked at him with pain in her eyes.

He’d cried that night into a glass of wine. He’d actually grabbed Sirius and held him snuggling him close needing the reassurance. Sirius held him back telling him he wasn’t a monster. Severus had joined them exhausted and emotionally drained, holding them both. Remus was hurting, his little family felt so wrecked. Severus had to be a ‘loyal Death Eater’, Sirius was ‘dead’ and he was a ‘monster’.

**********

Sirius wandered the halls bored, he hated being ‘dead’ but he hated poyjuicing to Remus or Severus more. He felt terrible for them they were hated, at least as a ghost he got a break. He watched Spike swooping above him. He rounded the corner seeing Neville writing on the wall.

“Neville, what are you doing?”

“Sirius!” He yelped jumping, “You scared me.”

“Sorry,” He said reading ‘Dumbledore’s army still recruiting’. “You’re still running Harry’s club?”

“Yeah- don’t tell the Death Eaters, Snape or Lupin.” Neville said walking away gesturing for him to follow. “I can’t believe you’re a ghost. I didn’t think squibs could become ghosts.”

“What can I say, I’m one of a kind.” He said as Neville snorted.

“Hey Sirius, you should help me. I’m starting a rebellion.” He said in a whisper trying to move closer to him, Sirius stepped away not wanting to be touched. “Having a ghost on our side would be bloody awesome. You could relay messages.”

“Of course I’ll help.” Sirius said smirking, “Anything.”

“Great.” Neville said excited before he became still. “I’m sorry Sirius.”

“For what?” He asked watching Spike.

“Sirius, your dead. I’m sorry. That’s all.” Neville said awkwardly.

“Oh that…” Sirius replied awkwardly, “Its fine. So how can I help?”

**********

Remus woke up to their wards going off, he jumped up looking at Severus alarmed. They ran to Sirius’s room but it was still warded tight, he yanked open the door seeing him flopped sleeping soundly, Spike hissed from the ceiling. Severus swallowed hard bolting to his office, Remus shut and warded the door again.

“Dipsey, Dobby.” He called, they popped into existence. “Watch Sirius.”

They nodded as he ran through the door that took him straight to the headmaster’s office. The door was open and Dumbledore’s portrait was panicking, “The sword! The sword! They took the sword of Gryffindor!”

Remus’s eyes widened, he raced out of the room glad it was close to the full moon. He scented the air and tore after his husbands scent. He soon found him and three incapacitated students, Neville, Ginny and Luna. He looked at them as the trio struggled on the ground in their binds while his husband held the sword looking furious.

“You three will be serving detention for a month with Hagrid!” Severus spat. It wasn’t enough Remus thought, they could try it again. They could jeopardize their mission, or accidently reveal Sirius. He would not let his pup be put in danger so they could play hero. He hated himself for what he was about to do. Severus was still ranting about their punishment when he came up putting a silky hand on his husbands shoulder silencing him.

“I have a better idea.” Remus said showing off his teeth smiling wide. “Tomorrow nights the full moon. Let Moony have them.”

He ran his tongue over his teeth looking down at them, he saw the shivers of fear pass over their faces. He felt sick. Severus breathed deeply giving them the side eye. “Not a bad idea… However this is their first offence. Perhaps next time Moony can have some fun.”

**********

Remus felt terrible, he had woken up in his room after the full moon. Severus beside him exhausted and patting his hand. He looked at him so afraid, “What happened Severus?”

“You ran lose in the school.” He said softly.

“Did I-”

“No.” Severus said softly, “I had the elves follow us and make sure all the children were safe.”

Remus sighed in relief, “And Sirius?”

“He spent the night here. He wasn’t happy being alone but Spike was there for him. And I noticed he brought Hedwig in too.” Remus nodded at his words.

“I hate this Severus.” He said tearing up, “I don’t want to hurt anyone.”

“You won’t.” Severus said wrapping his arms around him. “I’m here. We’re keeping them safe.”

**********

Sirius stood by Neville and another boy watching the Carrow’s chain a first year up. Bloody ridiculous Sirius thought. He would have to tell Severus and Remus how insane they were.

“We need to save him.” The other boy, Michael said.

“Right.” Neville said, “Sirius you distract them. Michael you free the kid I’ll guard you. If they spot you take the kid and run. I’ll fight them off. Ready?”

“As I can be.” Sirius muttered. He walked out looking at the Carrow’s curiously doing his best wide eyed innocent act as they looked at his iridescent form. “Headmaster Severus wants you.”

They sneered at him one laughed, “Such a useful squib, even as a ghost.”

They walked past him as he scooted to the side not letting them touch him. He saw Michael jump down accioing the key to him, in his nervous haste he dropped it, clattering to the floor. The Carrow’s turned around, sending a crucio at him. Neville jumped into the fray as a two on two spell battle started.

“Get the first year out! Run!” Neville yelled, “I’ll hold them!”

Michael seemed reluctant but did as he was told. Sirius gave a whistle launching Spike from his perch above them, he landed hard knocking down a Carrow as Neville was stupified landing beside him. Michael and the first year ran the other Carrow chasing them, Sirius squatted by Neville.

“You alright Neville?” He asked getting a nod as the remaining Carrow screamed, Sirius turned around whacking his hand to the ground repetitively making a thumping noise. “Don’t eat his brain it’s not good for you!”

Spike hissed ramming his head hard against the man’s skull knocking him out. He turned back to Neville but he was looking at Sirius’s hand alarmed. He reached out quickly hand landing on Sirius’s, they looked each other in the eyes. “Bloody hell I can touch you and you’re warm. Sirius you’re alive?”

Sirius blanched, “Not here.”

Neville nodded, they ran down the hall Spike swooping along with them. They went into an empty classroom as Neville looked at him expectantly. Sirius looked back shifting his weight from foot to foot.

“Sirius what’s going on?” Neville ask as Sirius held out his arms catching Spike who was fully grown taking up most his chest.

“I’m not dead but you can’t tell anyone.” He hissed looking him in the eye.

“But- But Harry saw them kill you.” Neville said as Sirius shook his head no. “It- It was fake?”

“My dads love me they would never hurt me.” Sirius said rubbing an iridescent hand along Spike’s back. “It was an act, Dobby helped us pull it off.”

“What’s going on than with this?” He gestured at Sirius.

“Potion. Dad- Severus made it.” Sirius said, “Neville please, you need to swear to secrecy.”

“Whose side are they on?” Neville asked.

“The lights they don’t want this.” Sirius said. “Neville, please we can’t ruin their cover. They are doing everything in their power to keep the school and students safe. They didn’t ‘dispose’ of the muggleborns they obliviated them to keep them safe. Please you can’t reveal that I’m alive or whose side they’re really on.”

“Alright, I’ll promise.” He said, “Sirius I’m so glad you’re ok. And I’ll help you like your helping me.” Sirius smirked at him. “Harry was so upset, he’s going to flip when he finds out you’re alright.”

“He should know. I wrote him a letter with instructions to only open it when he misses me most.” Sirius said.

**********

It was the day after Christmas when the portrait of Phineas Nigellus ran up to his frame. “Headmaster Snape, Lupin! Potter and company are camping in the forest of Dean! The Mudblood-”

“Do not use that word!” Severus snapped.

“-The Granger girl then. I heard her say it as she opened her bag.”

“Good. Very good!” Cried the portrait of Dumbledore behind the Headmaster’s chair. “Now, gentlemen, the sword! Do not forget that it must be taken under conditions of need and valor – and he must not know that you gave it! If Voldemort should read Harry’s mind and see you acting for him –“

“We know!” Severus snapped.

Sirius ran up to him eagerly with Remus. They leaned in as Remus spoke, “What’s the plan?”

“I’m going to lead him to the sword with my patronus.” Severus said.

“That won’t work.” Sirius said shaking his head.

“And why not?” Severus asked.

“Well it could look like a trap.” Sirius said, “I could lead him to it all ghostly.”

“You just want to see Harry.” Remus said, “You’ll give him a heart attack.”

“But he’ll follow me.” Sirius said, “He’ll follow me faster than he will a random wolf patronus.”

“He’s right.” Dumbledore’s portrait said getting their attention. “Make sure he look's dead and he shouldn't speak to Harry. Hurry now, time is of the essence.”

They apparated quickly, landing in the forest with the sword. Severus sent off a patronus watching it hurry towards Harry, they followed it only cancelling it once they found what they were looking for. Severus dropped the sword to the bottom of the frozen water. Sirius looked at them waiting as Severus handed him fulgorque exspiravit.

“Listen, I’m going to cast a silencing charm on you.” Severus said, “You can’t talk to Harry and don’t let him touch you.”

“I know.” Sirius groaned drinking the potion quick, he figured he should tell them about his letter but he was afraid they might not let him see Harry then.

“Don’t get startled we may use spells on you to help.” Remus said.

“Ok. I’ll be fine. I’ve been ‘dead’ for months.” Sirius said handing Remus Spike, he pointed at the swooping evil. “Stay.”

He looked up at them as Severus cast a silencing spell and added a glowing charm to him. “Good luck. I think my patronus could pass as a ‘Snuffles’ so let me help you.”

Sirius opened his mouth to agree but no words came out, he nodded. Soon he was next to a wolf patronus following it to Harry. He didn’t see him but the patronus seemed to as it became excited bounding around him like his brother would in animagi form before turning to wisps of light floating around him.

“Sirius?” Harry said stepping towards him becoming visible out of nowhere. They were a good few feet apart, Harry tilted his head at him eyes searching him. Sirius reached out slowly holding his hand out beckoning him. Harry nearly stumble as he moved towards him fast Sirius smiled at him. He felt himself get levitated and pulled backwards, it was startling but he kept the surprise off his face.

“Sirius! Sirius wait!” Harry yelled, “I’m sorry! I’m sorry I couldn’t save you! Not a day goes by that I don’t think of you.”

Sirius stared at him, didn’t he read the letter? He was floated over the frozen lake, he pointed down. Harry looked at him confused casting a lumos carefully walking out onto the ice. Sirius was pulled back again when Harry almost reached him he kept pointing down. Harry looked at him before clearing the snow from the frozen lake.

“Is that the sword of Gryffindor?” Harry asked, Sirius nodded. “Accio sword.”

Sirius huffed crossing his arms, Harry looked at him shyly. The wisps floating around Sirius formed the patronus again diving into the frozen lake disappearing. Harry made a little ‘ahh’ noise.

He looked up at Sirius, “Will you be here still after I get the sword?” Sirius shook his head closing his eyes in a slow blink. “Sirius I’m so sorry… I- I loved you.” Harry said Sirius gave him a sad smile, they’d be together again. He looked down at his hand making a little heart with his pointer fingers and thumbs. Harry laughed bitterly, making the sign back. He looked him in the eye as Harry breathed deeply a sad smile on his lips. “Goodbye Sirius try to go to rest. Tell Regulus I miss him too.”

Sirius startled at that, ‘go to rest’, ‘tell Regulus’ he opened his mouth trying to ask him about the letter but no words came. Harry smiled at him as he slipped under the water then Sirius was pulled back to his parents. They apparated with a snap back to Hogwarts, when they lifted the silencing spell on him he was crying slightly broken.

He looked up at them as he sunk to the floor, “Something is wrong. I wrote him a letter but he thinks I’m dead- dead. I explained in the letter that it was fake. I- I don’t understand.”

Dumbledore’s portrait chuckled softly, “Ah yes. Young love so sweet and innocent, yet truly dangerous.”

“What did you do?” Remus snapped looking at the portrait.

“The draw with the snitch on it.” Dumbledore said. Severus stood opening the draw, he pulled out stacks of papers and finally Sirius envelope. “Sirius you could have sabotaged our mission. It’s a very good thing I peeked in your mind that day. I-”

“You took my letter from him!?” Sirius yelled standing, he slammed his hands on Severus’s desk glaring at the portrait as he nodded happily. “Harry thinks I’m dead! He thinks my parents killed me! That they’re traitors!”

“Feelings don’t matter in war.” Dumbledore said. "It was for the best."

“Now Albus you’ve gone too far.” Remus snapped, “They are good for each other. Harry would have been motivated to fight for love. Like I am, like Severus is.”

“He is motivated by love. For those he lost. If he knew Sirius was alive he might not be willing to die for the cause.” Dumbledore argued, Sirius’s eyes widened.

“Why would he die for the cause?” Sirius asked, “He’s going to defeat You-Know-Who.”

“He has a horcrux inside him and Tom himself must kill it. He needs to die for the greater good. I could not have you in the way of that.”

“That’s not fair! He-”

“Life isn’t fair!” Dumbledore’s portrait bellowed making Sirius flinch tears perking in his eyes.

“Do not scream at my son!” Severus yelled as Remus wrapped his arm protectively around Sirius. “You had no right to meddle with his life like this! You went too far!”

“He’s not your son! He is a stunted squib! Who’s feeling are not as important as-” Sirius hurled a jar of ink at the portrait, it splattered down the side making the portrait huddle away from it cursing. Dumbledore stared wide eyed as Severus yanked him down from the wall. “What are you doing you need me!”

“I need kindling.” Severus grumbled tossing the portrait into the unlit fire place.

“How will you prove your innocence without me!?” He yelled. “Everything I’ve done is for the greater good!”

“We have a son as living proof. He is our greater good.” Remus hissed, as Severus whispered. ‘Incendio.’

“He doesn’t know.” Sirius muttered. “He doesn’t know I’m alive and he could walk into death.”

“Oh Sirius love.” Remus said wrapping his arms around him as Sirius held him tight burying his face in his shoulder. “There, there. It will get better- we’ll fix this. Somehow.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well now Neville is in on the secret. As they do Dumbledore's Army stuff.  
> And they are burning the portrait for the 'greater good' of Severus needing kindling.


	27. Chapter 27

Remus was beside himself upset with Dumbledore’s portrait. He was glad they had burned him away, so he would never taunt them or their Sirius again with his ‘greater good’. Sirius had begged them to take him back to the forest to tell Harry the truth or to at least give him back the letter. However it was not a good idea, if something happened to Harry someone could get their hands on the letter. Remus really truly considered taking Sirius back but Severus pointed out that Harry could think it a trap or want to keep Sirius with him. He knew in his heart there was too many ways it could go wrong, so sadly he had to tell him no. Sirius did not take that answer well, and had angrily avoided them for days, though he did admit he understood.

So maybe all that stress had gotten to Remus so he was a little extra angry when one of the Carrow’s dragged Neville in front of them. Neville had been caught writing ‘Dumbledore’s army still recruiting’ on the walls and had been crucioed for it. Then the Carrow said something that mad his blood boil.

“Make him a werewolf as punishment.” They demanded laughing at Neville, Remus was furious.

“How dare you punish a student without consulting me or my husband!” He bellowed, “And how dare you tell me who I should or shouldn’t give my _gift_ too!”

“I- I meant no disrespect.” They said back tracking.

“Oh yes you did!” Severus growled, “If you ever punish a student without mine or Remus’s say so I’ll make you sorry do you understand. I’ll make you bleed for your disrespect!”

“Y-yes.” They stumbled out.

“Good now get out while we deal with Longbottom accordingly.” Severus said eyes narrowing. The Carrow nodded backing out, with a quick wave of his hand Severus had the door slam.

They shared a look glancing at Neville, Remus cleared his throat. “Are you alright?”

“I’m fine sirs.” Neville said relaxing.

“Great, now don’t get caught again.” Severus said annoyed as handed him a bag of healing potions. “I’m going to have you ‘serve detention’ with Remus, he can show you more defense spells.”

“Brilliant.”

**********

Sirius looked at himself in the mirror, “Neville you’ve grown up to be quiet the good looking guy.”

“Err… Thanks Sirius.” Neville said awkwardly laughing as Sirius spun his new polyjuiced self around. “Look Sirius this is a big help, just don’t get caught. Alright?”

“I wasn’t planning too.” Sirius said looking at him pleased. “You don’t get caught either. But why do you want me to be you for this?”

“So nobody else gets blamed. I’ll take the brunt of the punishment by myself. Ready, let’s do this mate.” Neville said standing.

“This is gonna be wicked.” Sirius said, as they walked out together in identical clothes before splitting off from each other. Sirius hurried to the meeting point Spike on his ear cooing excited. “Calm down. We’re just being a distraction and I need you to not give us away.”

“Neville!” He almost kept walking till the name was called and he was grabbed and spun to face Ginny. “Neville are you deaf?”

“Oh- sorry. I’m in a hurry.” Sirius said trying to walk away but she followed.

“More of your revolution?” She asked, “Let me help.”

“No, it’s easier alone.” Sirius said with an eye roll. “I’m just causing a distraction.”

“I’m helping anyway. Who are we distracting and from what?”

“The Carrows, I’m the distraction while a single person rescue squad is saving some the first years. The Carrows have them locked in a room forcing the fifth years to practice the cruciatis on them.”

“That’s awful.” She said, “Any word about Harry?”

“Nope.” He said bluntly, she sighed.

“I’m worried about him.”

“He’ll be fine.” Sirius said turning towards the meeting point.

“I can’t wait to see him again.” She said with a pleased smile. “I hope he forgives me…”

“Why so you can move in on him. Glad to know me- Sirius being dead is so beneficial for you.” He muttered as he leaned around the corner seeing if the real Neville was in position yet.

“Neville, it doesn’t make me happy. I wish he didn’t die. But I... I still want Harry to forgive me.” She said breathing deep she leaned in, “I- I got help you know. I saw someone, a therapist. Mom made me after what Ron told her I did last year. I- look I know you see Sirius’s ghost. He avoids me.”

“I wonder why.” Sirius grumbled.

“Please Neville. I don’t expect him to forgive me but- could you tell him I’m sorry. I was a real arse to him and- he didn’t deserve it.” She mumbled, he looked at her suspiciously. She had slapped him, and said truly horrible things to him. He was glad she was trying to get help but he did not trust her. At his silence she sighed defeated, “So what’s the plan Neville?”

“It’s about to happen.” He said seeing the real Neville in position, she looked at him curiously. He stood up rushing into the room with her on his heels. He smirked not warning her, he ran in tossing some of the twins demon dung bombs into the room. He felt bad for the students but he certainly had the Carrow’s attention. He ran from the room, Ginny barely following him.

“Get back here!” The Carrow’s yelled running after them wands drawn as the four of them ran down the hall. He glanced back seeing Neville run into the room, great he thought. Ginny shot a few hexs back as he rummaged through his bag.

“Neville help me hex them.” She demanded, he ignored her pulling out an orange vile. He turned tossing it behind them as one of the Carrow’s ran through it, she instantly stuck face planting on the ground. Ginny smirked at him, “Nice job Neville. One more to go.”

She turned around casting a few hexs before she managed to land a jelly legs jinx making the Carrow trip over himself. He cast a curse as he fell nailing Sirius in the back, he crashed down skinning his hands on the wooden floor as the cutting curse ripped up his back.

“Neville!” Ginny yelled pulling him to his feet. “Come on let’s get to the room.”

“No I’ll be fine.” He hissed as she dragged him along, the real Neville was going back to the room of requirements to meet Luna with the first years for secret healing.

“Nonsense you’re hurt.” She said as he tried to pull away, she got him all the way to the room, shoving him in. Luna looked up alarmed at them.

“Ginny,” He said quickly, “Go make sure we weren’t followed.”

She nodded leaving. Luna looked at him, she moved forwards taking in his back as Spike uncurled looking at her. “You’re not Neville. It’s good to see you again Sirius.” He pursed his lips, “I’m glad you’re alright. I won’t tell anyone.”

“Thanks Luna.” He said looking at her softly. “Let me guess Spike gave me away.”

“Mhmm. That and Nargles really like your hair, even with it polyjuiced they still follow you. I can’t blame them your hairs very soft.” She said handing him a potion. “This will help you. But you should go before Ginny and the real Neville come back.”

“Keep it for the first years. Dad can heal me.” Sirius said standing.

She nodded holding up a portion of her hair cutting it with a quick wand movement. “Here. I don’t mind. As long as you don’t mind being a girl.”

“Luna…” He said feeling Neville’s form bubbling away as he took the offered hair. “I need to go. I’ll see you again.”

“Bye Sirius.” She said smiling sweetly as he called Dipsey and left in a pop.

He landed in his room with a crack making Severus and Remus run in. Severus scowled disappearing to get a potion while Remus sat next to him. “Where you seen? Did you free them?”

“I wasn’t seen. Yes they’re free. Luna knows, she won’t tell and now I have her hair.” Sirius said holding up the blonde locks.

Remus sighed in relief. “You have good friends Siri.”

“Still makes me nervous.” Severus said putting a healing slave on his back.

“But it will help us.” Sirius argued, “Her and Neville both now know you’re on the lights side. It will help keep you safe.”

“Sirius we want to keep you safe.” Remus said taking his hands.

**********

Remus swallowed hard rubbing his temples, it was getting worse out there. He had taken to listening to the hidden Weasley’s station in their quarters surrounded by silencing charms. He would bite his nails listening for the names of those he loved, or for his students. He would drink whiskey hearing the names of those that became lost. Sirius and his husband would sit with him listening, nervous and scared.

He didn’t tell Sirius but Barrick had come to Hogwarts wishing for more of his son’s stuff. He refused him, he demanded he never come back and interrupt him and his husband for such drabble again. He was terrified the man would run into Sirius and scare his pup to death. Barrick hadn’t been pleased but Remus did not care.

He was summoned through Severus to the Dark Lord. He feared that he was in trouble for the ordeal with Barrick when the Dark Lord spoke. “Tell me Remus, have you had to turn any unruly children.”

“No my Lord.” Remus said from his bow. “The threat of me alone terrifies them into compliance.”

“Excellent.” He said smiling as he ran a hand down Nagini. “The Carrow’s tell me that the Longbottom boy is being most troublesome. Severus is this true?”

“He’s a tad unruly but we keep making an example out of him.” Severus said, “So far none others dare to follow him. He is fighting a fruitless battle.”

“How have you been ‘making an example’ of him?” He asked lips curling. “I will not have the youths turn against me.”

“My Lord he has been crucioed, giving detentions with the worthless half giant and disgusting squib.” Severus said, “He will learn his lesson soon.”

“It’s not enough.” The Dark Lord hissed, “He still dares defy you. Thus he defies me. Remus.”

“Yes my Lord?” Remus said terrified of what he feared would be asked of him.

“Turn the boy. Show him how weak he really is.” The Dark Lord said smiling.

“My Lord if I may.” Remus said swallowing hard. “Longbottom is most attached to his grandmother. Instead of tainting a young pureblood with my curse allow me to attack her instread.”

The Dark Lord smiled and Remus tried not to show the horror he felt with himself. Voldemort spoke, “I approve of this plan. However I do not need a fierce werewolf to take down a frail old woman. You are dismissed.”

**********

Ghost Sirius stood by Neville as the man breathed deeply face in his hands. “I can’t believe they attacked my gran. She’s on the run. She beat the tar out of them, one’s even in St. Mungo’s.”

“I’m so sorry Neville.” Sirius said scuffing his feet.

“It’s fine Siri.” Neville said smiling at him, “Thank Merlin Remus warned me. But now, I need to disappear…”

“You could live in the forest? If I could you can.” Sirius said as Neville shook his head standing from the desk in the abandoned classroom.

“No Sirius, I’m not like you. I wouldn’t survive out there. Plus I don’t want to leave the school unguarded. They need me. And I’m not the only student that needs to hide.” He started pacing. “I need a place we can hide and that can get us in and out of the school.”

“To bad the room doesn’t have a tunnel out.” Sirius said cracking his neck.

“Why can’t it though?” Neville said looking at him brows raised. They ran to the room of requirement, Neville started pacing muttering to himself. Soon the door formed, they rushed in seeing a room well prepared for multiple students and a picture of a tunnel. Neville smiled tapping the picture revealing there was in fact a secret tunnel behind it. Neville looked at him smiling, “Now all we need is to figure out food.”

“No problem. Dipsey! Dobby!” Sirius called making the little female elf appear. “I need you to help my mate Neville, he and some friends are going to be living in here. They’ll need food.”

“Dipsey would be honored Sirius sir and Neville sir!” She said bouncing about pleased.

Sirius looked around her, “Where’s Dobby?”

Dipsey stopped her bouncing face turning sour, “H-he was called by Dumbledore’s brother days ago. He hasn’t returned… Dipsey is worried Sirius sir.”

“Oh Dipsey. I’m sure he’s fine.” Sirius said as the elf rung her hands.

**********

Sirius, Neville and Luna decided today was the day they would go down the tunnel. They had also agreed that ghost Sirius was not a good candidate for this job. Sirius looked at his polyjuice potion, he was out of Neville’s hair so he tossed a blonde strand in. Essence of Luna was not good, he scrunched up his face at the horrible potion and soon found himself short, blonde and feminine.

He walked out of his bedroom holding up his pants as they were much too large. He clomped up to Severus in his now oversized boots nearly making him drop his mug. “Oh Merlin, Sirius why?”

“We are going through the tunnel and we agreed ghost me shouldn’t.” He said, his voice squeaky and dreamy like Luna’s. “I’m out of Neville’s hair. Can you fix my clothes and shoes?”

Severus gave his wand a wave, helping him. Sirius nodded intending to leave when he was grabbed and dragged back. His dad accioed a hat to him transfiguring it to a bra, Sirius balked at this horrified refusing to accept it. Severus laughed, “Don’t think you need it? Fine let me turn away then jump up and down.”

Sirius did and reluctantly took the bra muttering. “Not a word.”

“Be extremely careful. I’ll tell Remus who you are.” Severus said leaning in like he would kiss his head only to stop giving the Luna form a look over. He shook his head, upped the tracking charms on his shoes and waved him off.

Sirius ran down making it to the room, meeting Luna by the door. She smiled looking at him bringing him in. Neville looked at him and chuckled, “You _ladies_ ready?”

“Neville.” He warned as he followed him through the portrait tunnel. It led them to Hogs Head and a man with striking resemblance to Dumbledore named Aberforth. He had been understandably surprised to see three young adults climbing out from behind his sister Ariana’s portrait.

“So you three kids are from Hogwarts?” He said crossing his arms amused, “And you’re fighting those nasty Death Eaters from within. How brave, foolish but brave.”

Sirius didn’t say anything at the Death Eater comment, he scuffed his shoes keeping his eyes down. Neville nodded, “That’s right sir. I’m Neville and this is Luna and-”

“My sister Siri.” Luna said wrapping her arm around Sirius.

He smiled at her, as Aberforth nodded eyeing Ariana who was watching Sirius intently. He led them in serving them all small glasses of fire whiskey. “Listen to me. The war is over, You-Know-Who has won. The Order is destroyed you’re fighting a losing battle.”

“That’s not true. Harry’s still alive.” Sirius said, “And the Order is still out there. They’re in hiding but when the time comes they’ll be ready.”

“Young lady I truly hope you are right.” Aberforth said dipping his head. “My brother was a stupid foolish man. He only cared for himself and of his ‘greater good’.”

“I don’t care much for the greater good,” Sirius replied. “But I can’t live in a world that the Dark Lord rules.”

“Me either.” Neville said, “They’re after my gran.”

“We all believe in Harry Mr. Aberforth.” Luna said softly.

Aberforth smiled gently at them. “You three are brave. But you’re school is over run with death eaters you are outnumbered an out matched.”

“Then help us fight them.” Neville said, “Through that tunnel we have a secret room where we are helping students escape all ready to aid Harry. When lightning strikes we’ll be there.”

“When lightning strikes…” He seemed amused by that, he glanced at them, then to Ariana. “What do you think?” The portrait was silent she smiled at them then pointed at Sirius. Aberforth smirked, “You like her?”

The portrait furrowed her brows and pointed at him again. Aberforth stood gesturing Sirius to follow him over. He stood in front of the portrait in Luna’s form as Ariana looked at him. He swore she was seeing through him, not looking at his polyjuiced form but all the way to the real him. She smiled looking at her brother, he leaned in allowing the portrait to whisper to him. He nodded along with her hushed words, finally he leaned back.

“So you three snuck into my home, through a secret tunnel and deceive me with this. Polyjuice.” He held his hand out to Sirius annoyed. Luna and Neville sprung to their feet ready to defend him.

“I’m sorry.” Sirius said quickly, “I’m not supposed to be here, people think I’m dead. Please I’m on the lights side.”

Aberforth didn’t look pleased but Ariana was looking at him amused. The older man shared a look with the portrait as she cocked her head smiling eyes darting to Sirius. Finally he looked back at them. “She likes you. She thinks you are good. Which means I don’t care who you are. I will help you three and your cause.”

“Thank you. Both of you.” Neville said. Ariana smiled wide at the recognition which had Aberforth sighing pleased.

**********

“Look at this!” Remus yelled bringing the newspaper into the room Sirius was in showing him Harry and company escaping Grigotts on the back of a dragon. “This is insane! Severus says the Dark Lord believes they’ll come here.”

“I’ll find out.” Sirius said jumping down from his bed. He rushed to his potions collection. “Bullocks I’m out of fulgorque exspiravit. Pollyjuice it is.” He tossed blonde hair in having forgotten to get more hair from Neville. He threw the potion back eyes watering at the taste as he started shrinking. “It never tastes better.”

“Aww… I always wanted a daughter.” Remus joked at Sirius’s new feminine form. “Let me fix your clothes _Luna_.”

“Stuff it.” Sirius said his voice coming out in the girlish squeak of Luna. He ran to the door stopping only to grab his chest, he looked at him mortified. “Ugh! Not again. I swear to Merlin don’t laugh. Can you make me a bra?”

Remus couldn’t look at him as he transfigured one from a shirt. “Here.”

“Thanks.” He mumbled putting it on under his clothes. “I’ll let you guys know as soon as possible if I find anything out.”

“Thank you love.” Remus said as Sirius headed for the door. “I’ll tell Severus of your new form. And act like Luna!”

Sirius waved him off over his shoulder running to the room of requirements, it was shut but a little banging had Seamus opening the door. He looked at him funny, “Luna? What?”

“I couldn’t get the door open. It’s an emergency.” He said slipping past him.

Seamus made a face but seemed satisfied. He pushed past people getting to Neville in the back of the room, he squatted down next to him looking over his defense plans. Neville turned meeting his gaze kissing him surprisingly fast. “Hey beautiful.”

Sirius blinked owlishly, “You’re dating Luna? Couldn’t you guys have told me that first?”

“Sirius?” Neville hissed alarmed nearly toppling over. “Bloody hell, sorry mate.”

“It’s fine.” He said, “Did you see the paper?”

“Yeah- I’m waiting for news from Aberforth.” Neville said looking back at the portrait. He lowered his voice, “What will you do when he shows?”

“Tell my parents. They need to be ready to take down the Carrows.” Sirius said, “Then I need to get to Harry and tell him I’m alive and that my dads are the good guys. And of course hope to Merlin he still loves me after deceiving him. Even though I tried to warn him… If he forgives me, I’m going to snog his face off.”

“Sounds good.” Neville said looking at him, “Merlin just don’t snog him with Luna’s face.”

Sirius laughed looking up, “Ariana’s coming. They must have news.”

“Alright, hold down the fort. I’ll be back.” Neville said following the portrait through the tunnel.

“Hi Sirius.” The real Luna said sitting next to him a small glamor changing her appearance just enough for them not to be identical. She teasingly smiled at him, “I saw you kiss my Neville. Don’t worry I won’t tell Harry.”

“Gee thanks.” He said nervously looking at the tunnel.

“Will you tell him right away?” She asked, brushing his hair back. “Neville and I will be right here.”

“Thanks. I’m going to tell him as soon as I can. Preferably when we have a second to breathe. Do you think he’ll forgive me? I tried to tell him but Dumbledore ruined it.”

She took his hand, “Of course he will. Remember Sirius Black is the only one that can boss Harry Potter around.” He smiled at her.

“Neville’s coming back!” Seamus yelled. “And he’s not alone!”

Neville opened the door, “I have a surprise for you lot!”

He moved aside letting Harry, Hermione and Ron threw, Sirius gripped Luna’s hand tightly seeing him as the room erupted into clapping and cheering. He stood up with Luna trying to get to Harry but they were jostled and pushed aside by the more boisterous crowd. He tried to push threw but Luna’s smaller form was easily shoved out of the way. The real Luna pulled him back before they got hurt.

“Let the crowds die.” She said her voice dreamy. “You wanted to tell him when you could breathe anyways.”

He nodded standing back as Harry climbed onto a box announcing that they were looking for a horcrux. It would be an unknown item belonging to Rowena Ravenclaw. Mutters of confusion rippled through the crowd. The real Luna offered up the idea of a lost diadem which seemed like a good fit suddenly the room’s doors opened as Ginny ran in.

“Harry…” She said stopping, Sirius glared at her. “They know. Snape and Lupin know that Harry was spotted in Hogsmeade.” Sirius groaned well he guessed it was too late to warn them. Ginny kept speaking, “Snape’s ordered all the students and staff to the Great Hall.”

“Fine. We’ll all go there.” Harry growled, “I have a few things I’d like to say to them.”

There was a surge then of all the students moving at the same time mixing Harry, Hermione and Ron into the middle to hide them. Sirius moved forwards, “Harry!”

“Luna shush!” Seamus said looking at him, “Gotta keep this under wraps girly.”

“But I need to tell him something. It’s crucial!” He said as he and the real Luna tried to get to them as they slowly mixed with the rest of the student body. “Har-”

“Luna!” Seamus yelled covering his mouth stopping him and the real Luna. “You can’t go yelling his name right now.”

“Seamus he’s right Harry needs to know this.” The real Luna said cancelling her glamor.

Seamus jumped back startled. “Two Luna’s! Then who are you?”

“No time.” Sirius hissed, “We have to catch him, before something terrible happens.”

“Blimmy come on!” Seamus said trying to help them push through the crowd with his bigger form. However Harry was already mixed into the Great Hall. He and Luna shuffled along with Seamus standing in line. The taller boy sighed, “I’m sorry girls I don’t see him.”

Sirius ignored the girl’s comment jumping a little trying to see. Severus stood in front of the students addressing them, threatening them more likely as Remus stood glaring trying to act menacing. Sirius knew they just wanted to draw Harry out. They had told him if they could draw Harry out they could control the situation and get him to the Headmasters office and tell him everything. They were also relying on Sirius being able to help convince them.

There was a collective gasp, he turned seeing Harry stepping out of the crowd. The doors of the great hall opened, revealing the Order of the Phoenix. This wasn’t supposed to happen, they would never believe them without him, and he was still Luna. He pushed past them going towards Harry.

“How dare you stood, where he stood.” Harry said, Sirius kept moving and shoving people cursing Luna’s small form. “Tell them. Tell them all how you looked him in the eyes a man who trusted you and killed him. And you Lupin. You killed Sirius. He loved you. You’re a monster!”

“He didn’t!” Sirius yelled breaking through the crowd. “Harry-”

“Luna?” Harry asked glancing at him confused.

“No- Harry I’m not dead.” Sirius looked at him panicking, the whole room was looking at him.

Harry looked at him confused. “Luna what are you talking about?”

“No. I’m Sirius!” He said looking down at his feminine form. “It’s polyjuice. I-”

“This is a lousy trick!” Harry yelled yanking free his wand pointing it at him. His parents freed their wands ready to defend him. Harry whirled glaring at them, “I’m going to kill you Lupin, for taking him from me!”

“Harry no don’t kill my papa!” Sirius yelled frantic as the real Luna burst from the crowd with Neville.

“It’s true Harry!” Neville yelled, Luna adding. “It’s really Sirius!”

Harry paused looking at them confused. “Prove it!”

“When I was ‘nine’ you let me sleep with you in the great hall because I had a nightmare, that’s when I got my first crush on you.” Sirius said swallowing hard, “Our first kiss was in the prefect’s bathroom in forth year. You call me cute and I act like I hate it but I love it. I make you brownies with nuts because that’s your favorite even though nuts are gross.” Harry lowered his wand swallowing as Sirius continued. “You first said you loved me after Slughorn’s Christmas party last year. Then after we had- umm yeah do you believe me?”

Harry stared at him a bit longer like her was unsure. Sirius cursed looking down with his hands making a heart with his thumbs and pointer fingers. Harry’s eyes widened at this, “But if you’re Sirius then that means-”

Harry was interrupted by the Carrow’s cursing, each being taken down respectively by Severus and Remus. Sirius smiled his face bubbling slightly as Remus snatched the downed Carrow’s wands snapping them. He looked at them huffing, “We can explain. Right Sirius?”

Harry turned back around looking at him nearly dropping his wand. “Sirius.”

“Hi Harry. I’m sorry- I tried to tell you but Dumbledore stole my letter from you.” Sirius said quickly trying to explain himself.

Harry ran at him, Sirius threw his hands up out of habit as he was tackled. Arms wrapped around his upper body as he was picked up off the ground and spun. “You’re alive! Oh Merlin Sirius you’re alive!”

Harry put him down taking in his now normal face. He leaned in quick stealing Sirius’s lips, he kissed him back thrilled. He was so caught up in the moment he forgot about everyone else. It seemed Harry did too as his hand moved holding him lower and lower.

Severus cleared his throat now next to them making them jump apart red, while Remus glared daggers at Harry. Hermione and Ron shot from the crowd, Hermione wrapped him in a big hug crying while Ron looked relieved.

Severus sighed, “Harry we have so much we need to tell you.”

“Remus! Severus!” McGonagall yelled running up to them her eyes watering. She looked at them a moment, “The muggle born students, you didn’t-”

“Obliviated but alive.” Remus said.

“Oh thank heavens you two aren’t murders. Oh Sirius.” She said looking at him a moment. She schooled her face and looked at his fathers, “Brief Potter on whatever you need. We’ll prepare the school for battle. Mr. Longbottom I have a job for you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Harry and Sirius are back together. <3  
> Ginny is getting help and has come to terms that she was 'a little bonkers'. So there's that. :)


	28. Chapter 28

Harry white knuckled Sirius’s hand as Severus and Remus explained about the horcrux and how it was inside Harry. Sirius rubbed his hand telling him to breathe as they told him that it was believed that Voldemort himself had to be the one to destroy it.

“I haven’t destroyed all the horcruxs yet.” Harry said, “Nagini and Rowen Ravenclaw’s diadem still remain.”

“Then you four need to find them.” Remus said, “We’ll hold the battle as long as we can but it will start soon.”

“Alright. Let’s go Sirius!” Harry said standing.

“Not so fast!” Severus snapped, he walked up to Sirius redoing the tracking charms on his shoes.

“Seriously!” He cried, they leveled him with a look. He smiled, “I love you too.”

“Be safe.” Remus said as Harry dragged him out.

“Harry, you won’t die for this will you? There has to be another way.” Hermione said. Harry didn’t answer he squeezed Sirius’s hand as they ran down the hall.

“Where are we going?” Ron asked huffing.

“Room of requirement the room where everything is hidden.” Harry said. He stopped as they got to the hallway he began pacing still keeping Sirius’s hand in his. “Why won’t it open?”

“It’s me.” Sirius said trying to remove his hand from Harry’s. “The room won’t open for a squib. Let go.”

“Hermione open the door.” Harry said stepping back. “I’m not letting you go again.”

Hermione nodded pacing as the door appeared, they ran in showing a massive room of lost items. Ron scoffed, “Blimmy we’ll never find it.”

“Accio diadem.” Harry cried wand out, nothing happened.

“Really?” Sirius questioned unamused.

“Worth a shot. Come on I think I know where it is.” Harry said running into the room pulling Sirius behind him. “Last year I hide the Half-Blood Prince’s book in here. I marked its spot with a diadem. I bet its Ravenclaw’s.”

They ran into the room deeper and deeper still as the castle shook. Hermione huffed, “Do you think the battles started? We need to hurry.”

“There! Up there!” Harry said pointing above them on a pile of junk.

“I got it.” Sirius said trying to pull his hand away from Harry. “Harry let me go I can get it.”

“No. Ron do you think-”

“Harry!” Sirius cried looking at him. “I’m not going to disappear. Let me go! I’m a better climber then all of you.”

“But-”

“Not so fast Potter!” Draco snapped as him and his little cronies Crabbe and Goyle appeared wands out. His friends drew they’re wands as Harry tried pushing him behind him protectively. “You’re all coming with us. We’ll hand you over to the Dark Lord.”

“Expelliamis!” Hermione yelled, disarming Goyle. In the split second of surprise Sirius pried his hand free. He ran to the junk pile flinging himself at it climbing fast.

“Sirius!” Harry yelled.

“Go Sirius we’ll hold them!” Hermione yelled as Crabbe threw a killing curse at her.

“That’s my girlfriend you troll!” Ron yelled charging them.

The chair next to him blew to splinters as he climbed but he managed to reach the diadem. He grabbed it quickly looking down seeing Crabbe releasing the fiend fire spell forcing the two parties apart. He swore as the base of the pile caught on fire as what he could only describe as giant flaming animals tore after his friends and ironically Draco and his minions. With the ground bellow him in flames he scrambled up higher and higher till he reached the top nowhere to go.

“Spike.” He pulled his companion from his ear. Spike hissed back at him wrapping himself over his body trying desperately to get back to Sirius as he held him out. “Please go! Don’t die with me! Spike go!”

He lost his balance trying to shove his friend away, he braced for the impact as he tumbled down the junk. He expected to hit flames but his body was braced and he hover fell to the next pile over landing on desk sticking a little too far out.

“Merlin I’m alive!” He gasped holding his own chest as Spike let go of his shirt collar. “You are surprisingly strong.”

The swooping evil seemed to preen at this climbing back up to Sirius’s ear. He was able to shimmy around this pile landing in a pathway not devoured in flames. He swallowed hard, looking around before Draco and Goyle nearly ran into him.

“Get out of the way! Move, run!” Malfoy yelled, Sirius glanced behind them as a flaming dragon gave chase. He turned with no other option running with them. He heard yelling around him as things crashed and burned.

“Sirius! Sirius where are you!?”

He looked up seeing Harry and company flying on brooms above him. He stopped cupping his hands to his face, “Harry! Har-”

“Don’t stop stupid!” Malfoy yelled, grabbing him tight. “Get your bloody boyfriend to rescue us! He’ll come back for you!”

Sirius looked up as his friends started to pass them. “He can’t hear me!”

“Sonorus!” Draco snapped wand to his throat. “Now get him to get me out of here!”

“HARRY!” Sirius yelled his voice booming in the amplified version. Malfoy cut the spell as Harry and his friends flew towards them. Harry reached down grabbing Sirius’s hand when Draco wrapped his arms tight around his waist holding them down with his weight.

“Get off him!” Harry snapped trying to pull him free as Sirius struggled against his bigger form.

“Don’t leave us to die!” Malfoy yelled. “Please I covered for you to Bellatrix!”

“Malfoy, let him go and hop on!” Ron demanded lowering his broom. “Hermione you grab Goyle.”

Draco didn’t trust letting Sirius go, so he dragged him with him towards Ron. Harry looked pissed, he kept a firm grip on his hand, the other hand held the broom. As soon as Draco felt he was close enough he shoved Sirius away from him climbing on with Ron fast. Once he was let go, Harry yanked him up onto the broom. He barely got his hands around Harry’s middle as they zipped off.

Sirius pressed his face into Harry’s back trying to be as small as possible as the flames danced around them warming his skin. He felt Harry yank the broom this way and that till finally they tumbled out of the room landing roughly in a pile of limbs. Malfoy and Goyle sprung away from them then running away down the hall.

“Sirius, diadem!” Harry yelled scrambling up. Sirius held it above his head as he tried to catch his breath. “Ron stab it with the basilisk fang!”

He felt it get snatched from his hand, as hissing and black smoke formed around them. Hermione yelled, “Throw it in the room!”

Sirius flipped over seeing Ron throw a smoking screaming diadem into the burning room of requirement as Harry slammed the doors with his wand. They sat there all breathing heavily. Sirius looked at Harry, Ron and Hermione but they all seemed distracted eyes wide.

“Are you-” He was shushed quickly by Hermione as the trio tried to focus, finally after a minute or so they looked at each other.

“You can’t do it Harry.” Hermione said. “We’ll come up with a plan.”

“Do what?” Sirius asked, as Harry stumbled to his feet.

“We have an hour mate.” Ron said, “We’ll think of something. Anything!”

“An hour for what?” Sirius asked desperately.

Harry reached out pulling him up, they stared at each other. Harry looked at him a long time, he stroked Sirius’s hair away from his face. “You couldn’t hear him?”

“Hear who?” Sirius asked, “Please tell me what’s going on.”

“Voldemort is stopping the attack. He’s giving me an hour to come to the forbidden forest to face him. Or he says he’ll kill everyone.”

“Harry you can’t!” Sirius cried.

“I may not have a choice.” Harry said taking his hand pulling him along. “I need to get him to destroy the horcrux with in me and we still need to kill Nagini.”

**********

Sirius didn’t like this. He didn’t want Harry to die. They walked in a silent group to the great hall when the crowds where gathering, each lost in their own thoughts. The castle was in shambles, truly it was horrid. Those that were able, where clearing rubble to make way for the injured or worse.

“Fred… Fred!” Ron yelled bolting from them to join his family, Hermione following. Sirius watched him with his eyes, seeing Molly weeping over her son’s body. He turned away seeing Lavender getting covered with a sheet. He pulled his hand from Harry scanning the room for his fathers. He spun around a few times before he saw him, lying there.

“Papa!” He ran away from Harry sliding into place kneeling beside an eerily still Remus. He stared at him afraid to touch him, his hands shook. “No... N-no. No please… Please don’t be- Don’t be-”

“Sirius!” Severus’s arms wrapped around him kneeling with him. “It’s ok. It’s ok.”

Sirius held him back shaking. “Dad. Is he- Is he-”

“No! No, he’s alive.” Severus said running a hand through Sirius’s hair. He felt his heart calming down, “He got hit badly by a paralyzing spell.”

“Will he be ok?” Sirius asked finally looking at Severus, his neck was bandaged. “What happened to you?”

“Cutting curse. Remus will be fine once this gets in his system. I had to get it from my potions stores.” He said moving past him pouring a dark purple potion down Remus’s throat. Remus’s body shuddered as he began coughing, he blinked up at them alarmed.

“Where am I? What happened?” He asked as Sirius lunged landing in his arms, Remus automatically wrapped his arms around him. “Sirius? Why are you crying? Are you hurt?”

“I thought you were dead!” Sirius cried letting him sit up. “I- I saw you just lying there and thought-”

“Oh Sirius!” Remus said taking his hands rubbing them gently. “I’m alright. Very sore but alright.”

“Sirius are the horcruxs destroyed?” Severus asked.

“The diadem yeah but the snake no. And we still have to get the one out of Harry.” He said glancing over his shoulder to where his boyfriend was. “Harry? Harry?”

“Sirius!” Hermione cried running up to him with a tear stained Ron. “Is Harry with you?”

“No… You don’t think?” Sirius climbed to his feet. “We have to stop him! He can’t die! He can’t!”

“Sirius wait!” Remus yelled but Sirius was gone, running away from them he had to find Harry before it was too late.

He was glad he was fast, they couldn’t catch him as he got to the forest unopposed. He ducked and weaved around the trail till he heard a voice. He slowed down stumbling slightly heart pounding, he peaked around a tree seeing Harry alone in a clearing talking to himself. He sighed in relief, running to him.

“Harry!” He yelled literally jumping at him.

The other man turned catching him surprised, “S-Sirius, what are you doing here?”

“You can’t do it! You can’t die!” He argued holding him tight, Harry looped his arms around him. “I won’t let you. We’ll find another way!”

“Sirius… There is no other way.” Harry said rubbing his face against his. “I’m really sorry Siri but it’s for-”

“Don’t say the greater good!” He demanded pulling back to glare into his green eyes. “Please don’t do this. Don’t leave me. I love you Harry!”

“And I love you.” Harry said squeezing him, “That’s why I’m doing this Sirius. For you, for my friends, for everyone. They deserve a life where they don’t have to live in fear of Voldemort.”

“But you deserve a life too.” Sirius said, “I want a life with you.”

Harry smiled kissing him, “I want a life with you too Sirius.”

“Then let’s go back. Please. We’ll figure this out. Even if we have to spend the rest of our lives fighting, I’ll gladly do it with you.” Sirius said pulling his hand as Harry smiled.

“Sirius, I love you so much.” He said giving the shorter man a gentle tug towards him, he looked into Sirius’s eyes smiling. He looked around him before he seemed to land on a fixed point. “Please take care of him. Have him get rid of the ring and send him back to Hogwarts.”

“Harry who are you talking to?” Sirius looked over his shoulder seeing nothing.

“Sirius I really love you. I truly do, I-”

“Harry stop. What are you doing?” Sirius asked as Harry stepped into him cupping his face with both hands.

“Nothing Sirius. Don’t think about it. It will be alright.” Harry said kissing him.

“But Harry-”

“Sirius, I promised I’d always be there for you and I will.” Harry said. Sirius sighed relieved closing his eyes holding him tight feeling Harry kissing his cheek. He smiled happily unaware as Harry whispered against his skin. “I’m sorry... Obliviate...”

**********

He blinked his eyes clear, he was in a strange position like he should have been holding someone. He let his hands drop confused, no one was there. He glanced around him he was in the forbidden forest, he turned a bit more coming face to face with Regulus. He sprung back swearing profusely from the shock.

“Hi Sirius.” Regulus said smiling at him sadly.

“Reggie!” He tried to grab and hug him only for his hands to go through him as he nearly fell. “I-I don’t understand…”

“It’s the ring Siri.” Regulus said pointing at his hand. Sirius looked down seeing the ring with a black stone on his finger. “It’s the resurrection stone. Harry gave it to you.”

“Why did Harry give me this? Where is he?” Sirius asked looking around.

“Oh he’s a bit busy.” James said making Sirius’s eyes widen. “You’ve grown quiet a lot since we last saw you.”

“James… Lily?” He asked looking at the softly smiling red head. “But what?”

“Sirius I’m sorry we can’t stay.” Lily said gently, “We need to watch over Harry now. We just wanted to see you first.”

“Yeah- Harry… Where is he?” Sirius asked again.

“He’ll be with you soon.” James said, “And we’ll be watching over you both, always.”

“You can go when you’re ready James, Lily. I can take it from here.” Regulus said earning a nod from them both.

“See you later Padfoot.” James said smiling gently as they faded.

Sirius looked at Regulus confused and waiting, he felt tears forming in his eyes. “Oh don’t cry big brother.”

“But Reggie you’re-”

“It’s not so bad. Like falling asleep.” Regulus said moving like he would rub his back hand going through him instead. “Now listen. Harry gave you a job remember. You need to get rid of the ring.”

“But- then I’ll never be with you again.”

“Sirius, I never left you.” Regulus said smiling, Sirius smiled back sadly.

“Reggie- where’s Harry?” Sirius asked again feeling like he was missing something important. “I haven’t seen him since after we landed outside the room of requirements. Is he safe?”

Regulus swallowed hard, “I can’t answer that. But I know he will need you at Hogwarts.”

Sirius nodded pulling the ring mostly off. “I love you Regulus.”

“I love you Sirius and I’ll always be here even if you can’t see or hear me.” Regulus said fading as Sirius removed the ring. He looked at it in his hand trying to hold back tears. He brought his arm back and flung the ring with all his might into the forest. He sobbed watching the ring glint before it disappeared into the darkness.

He walked back to the castle in misery. He got to the gates wiping away his tears as Hermione, Ron and his father’s ran up to him. Hermione throwing her arms around his shaking form. “Sirius did you find Harry?”

“Find Harry? No I got rid of the resurrection stone like he wanted.” Sirius said holding her back. “It wasn’t easy…”

“The stone?” Ron gasped, “But you went after Harry.”

“Why would Harry be in the forbidden forest?” He asked over Hermione’s shoulder. She stiffen and again he felt like he had missed something. He glanced at his father’s seeing them share a knowing look as Ron’s face soured. “Am I- Am I missing something? Where’s Harry?”

Remus sighed deeply, he opened his mouth to speak when they heard McGonagall yelling. “They’re approaching the castle. The Death Eaters are approaching the castle. Hurry everyone!”

Sirius started to follow the surge when he was grabbed, and spun to face his fathers. Remus held his arms, “No matter what happens. Know we will always love you.”

Sirius swallowed nodding, he held them tight before following the crowd with them. They shuffled into the quart yard, he climbed over ruble managing to get a better view. He watched the Death Eaters walk forward, his heart stopped seeing Harry’s body in Hagrid’s arms. He must have moved because Remus was holding him back.

“No Sirius!” He whispered into his ear. “No! Don’t go out there he’ll kill you.”

Voldemort claimed victory, he claimed he defeated Harry Potter. Then he asked people to join him and Neville made a speech defying him as he yanked the Sword of Gryffindor from the sorting hat, then madness started. Harry was alive, he had dove from Hagrid’s arms and ran for the castle.

“Get inside! Get inside!” Severus yelled as he, Remus and McGonagall made shield charms helping protect people as they ran for safety as the Death Eaters descended on them.

It was insanity. Sirius ducked and ran as the battle went into full swing once more. Curses where flying everywhere, people screaming, parts of the castle exploding. That’s when he saw him, Barrick had his wand out making a fire like whip to fight people. His back was turned he’d never see Sirius coming, he took a step towards him when he heard a deranged cackle. He looked to his right seeing Bellatrix distracted focused on shooting spells at Ginny. He could only choose one.

Barrick had hurt him. Barrick had tortured him for years, used him as a play thing. Barrick had done unimaginable things to him. He swallowed hard looking at Bellatrix. She took Regulus from him. She had killed his little brother. She had made his worse fears a reality. She took one of the best things in his life away from him.

He ran at her giving a whistle, Spike uncurled and lunged. Bellatrix was thrown down hard swooping evil on her head as she screamed obscenities. He hated her, she murdered his brother, she ended Regulus’s life. He landed on her right as she swatted Spike away, she let out a grunt at his weight.

She smiled up at him showing teeth, “Little baby Sirius, you’re still alive?”

“You killed Reggie! I’m going to murder you!” He planted a hand on her throat squeezing, as he one handed removed a potion from his bag.

She gasped for a moment before swinging her arm up getting him with a wandless stinging spell. She rolled to her feet faster than him, “So you wanna play with magic squib? I’d love to have the Black brother’s as a full set.”

He hurled the potion at her, she only managed to block half of it screaming as the liquid burned her. She lunged fast throwing a curse at him, he dodged. She shrieked as she was hit by an expelliamis her wand clattered to the floor. He looked over surprised at Ginny, she nodded at him once before returning to the fray. He rolled up grabbing Bellatrix’s wand, snapping it in half.

She snarled at him. “Oh you’ll pay for that.”

Spike back and very furious at be swatted landed on Bellatrix once again, Sirius whistled, Spike’s head leaned back before cracking into her skull. She collapsed to the ground in a heap. He opened his mouth he would not let his little friend eat that insane brain but no words came. He tried again but he didn’t make a sound.

“Hello little one. So glad to see you’re still alive.” He tried to turn around, to face him but a stunning spell had his body sliding down to the floor. Another spell was placed on him making him lighter as he was promptly picked up and thrown over Barrick’s shoulder like a rag doll. “I was so lonely with you gone. The aurors took all my nice pictures of you so I truly had nothing.”

Sirius could barely move, he managed to look up just enough to see Spike distracted observing Bellatrix’s no doubt toxic brain. He tried to whistle but again the silencing spell kept him quiet. He rolled his head the other way looking around, in the chaos no one paid any attention to them as Barrick carried him out of the room.

A hand landed on his bottom rubbing and squeezing him, Barrick made a humming noise. “Do you think you’ll be as tight as you used to be? I can’t wait to break you in and find out.”

Sirius’s eyes watered. Why him? Why? He made a strangled noise in his throat. He wanted to scream. To kick. To fight him, the stunning spell should where off soon he hoped. Barrick was taking all kinds of side corridors to keep them as hidden as possible fighting one handed when he had too. “Little one I can hardly wait to feel you again. Once we get out of here the first thing I’ll do is make sure you’ll never be able to leave me again, then I’ll have you all to myself.”

Sirius’s eyes widened, he would not go with this man. He felt his fingers twitching, he realized he could lift his head the tightness in his body fading. He pulled himself up quickly elbowing Barrick in the back of the neck, startled Barrick stumbled dropping him. With his mobility back Sirius scrambled onto his feet shakily, he had to get away from him, he was muted and out matched.

“That’s a bad squib.” Barrick snarled making Sirius’s eyes widen, he hated that he was conditioned to fear those words. He swallowed hard, hand reaching for his expanding pouch. Barrick sneered, “Don’t fight me. Only bad squibs fight.”

He had so much he wanted to yell at this man. He snatched a potion hurling it at him, Barrick looked shocked casting a protection charm. Sirius reached for another potion backing up but Barrick was much faster, a cutting spell had his right arm bleeding. He closed his eyes in pain stumbling back as two stinging spells quickly hit him across the face. He opened his eyes right as a hand grabbed his hair yanking him backwards off his feet. He scrambled against the grip clawing as he was dragged, he reached down for his potions bag but it wasn’t there.

“I’m sorry little one did you want this?” Barrick asked holding up the bag as he pulled him into a room. “I need to punish you. You’ve been very naughty.”

Sirius reached up blindly peeling and bending back his fingers. He pushed one hard making Barrick let him go hissing in pain, Sirius landed on the floor. He scrambled to his feet looking for anything to fight him with. “Stupify!”

Sirius was thrown backward landing roughly on one of the large desks. He tried to roll up but a sticking charm had his back pinned. He struggled against it only managing to get his upper arms stuck too. Barrick came up leering over him, he kicked out since that all he could do, getting Barrick in the upper thigh and shoulder. His head was grabbed and slammed to the table, Sirius saw stars.

He blinked the confusion away as Barrick grabbed his pants yanking them down. No, not again. He thought struggling. Barrick took a step back as he kicked, he just smiled undoing his own pants. Sirius tried to glare but he was sure he looked more scared. The sick bastard was already hard.

“Oh little one…” He breathed heavily focusing on Sirius as he touched himself. “You clearly need to be reminded of your place if you think it appropriate to fight me. Such a bad squib.”

**********

Remus shot down a Death Eater feeling Severus at his back. It was madness here. He spun levitating falling stones from a gaggle of students. He heard a screeching and turned wand ready only for Spike to bulldoze into him. The swooping evil landed on his chest screeching loudly, hooks pulling his clothes as he moved about. Remus blinked confused looking down at the upset creature then up expecting Sirius. He wasn’t there. Spike screeched again.

“Severus!” He yelled grabbing him. His husband looked at him then to Spike alarmed. “Severus, where’s Sirius!?”

His husband held up his wand activating the tracking charm on their pups shoes. They tore after it, blasting any one and anything in their way. Remus’s heart was absolutely pounding, it got worse and worse the farther behind them the battle got. Spike had moved flying along with them screeching and hissing.

Severus jerked to a stop as his spell pointed at a locked room. Remus didn’t wait he threw himself at it knocking down the door. Sirius was laying face up on a desk silently screaming, pants by his thighs. He was struggling futilely against a sticking charm as Barrick fought to force himself between his legs. Remus saw red.

He forgot he was a wizard, he forgot everything. Moony said attack and he did. He lunged, knocking Barrick to the ground rolling up onto him and he just started wailing on him. He hated this man. Punch. He touched his pup. Punch. He tried to kidnap his kid. Punch. He was trying to rape Sirius again. Punch. He hated this man. Punch. Moony hated this man. Punch. He would never let him touch his child again! Punch.

**********

The door slammed open, he watched in shock as Remus yanked Barrick off him. He tried to turn his head to see where they went, but the sticking charm made it difficult. He heard a lot of noises from that direction but quickly became distracted as Spike landed on him cooing.

“Sirius.” Severus said coming into view. He unstuck him, helping him to his feet as Sirius numbly pulled his pants back into place. He tried to turn but Severus kept him facing him lifting the silencing charm. “Did he-”

“No! You guys got here before he could…” Sirius said. He knew Remus and Barrick were there along with a wet thumping sound and the metallic smell of blood. He tried to look behind him. “Is Papa ok?”

“Don’t turn around!” Severus said sternly, making him stay looking at him. He was herded out of the room, as his father took inventory of him casting a quick healing charm on his arm. “Are you sure you’re alright?”

“Yes. A little shaken that’s all.” Sirius said as Spike climbed to his ear cooing. His face crinkled, “I wasn’t strong enough…”

“What?”

“I wasn’t strong enough. He would have- he would have done it again. If you guys hadn’t shown up.”

“Sirius this is not a battle you have to fight alone.” Severus said holding his shoulders. “We will always support you. Let us take care of _this_.”

Sirius nodded eyes widening. “Harry- Harry needs us. We have to get back to the battle!”

“Harry needs you. Just like Remus needs me.” Severus said cupping his face as the wet thumping continued. “You should go. Be careful. We love you.”

"I love you too." Sirius said nodded, he took off running. He had to help Harry and their friends. Nagini had to die and he wouldn’t let anything get him his way. Harry needed him. This war wouldn’t keep them apart any longer. This war wasn't going to hurt his family or his life any more.

**********

“Remus... Remus stop...” Remus heard him. He heard Severus he really did but he couldn’t stop. His fist just kept making contact, dripping with blood, he landed another hit as he cried. Severus continued, “Remus love, we got here in time. He didn’t- You can stop.”

“No.” Remus said voice shaking threw tears. “Not yet. It’s not enough.”

Severus caught his wrist, “Remus… He’s gone... He can’t hurt Sirius anymore.”

Remus sat back on his knees, he couldn’t look at his husband. He’d just beaten a man to death with his bare hands. He started shaking, he was a monster. He let his hand hang limply from Severus’s, as he covered his face with his free hand crying. “I hated him so much…”

“As did I.” Severus said hauling him to his feet leading him out of the room.

“Did Sirius see what I did?” Remus asked, “Merlin he must be horrified with me…”

“He didn’t see. I made sure.” His husband said voice soft.

“I’m a monster.” He whispered feeling himself be spelled clean.

“No- You’re father. I wanted to kill him too. You were just faster.” Severus said. “Sirius is alright, shaken and possibly in shock but alright.” Remus looked at him seeing him smile lightly, “He already ran back into battle.”

“He’s so like you and Regulus.” Remus said cautiously smiling back. “He’s a fighter.”

“Really I think he’s like you, a lover.” Severus said, “He was worried about you back there. And he’s worried about Harry now.” Remus smiled at him as Severus offered his hand. “Shall we get back to the fray?”

“Yes. This war ends tonight!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In fantastic beasts, a full grown adult could step on a swooping evil and it could keep flying. So I think it stands to reason that Spike could help Sirius 'fall with style' to a safer area.  
> I didn't want Sirius to beat down both Bellatrix and Barrick, so he made a choice. 
> 
> Guys there's only one chapter left. :'( It's coming to an end. Friday will be my last Sirius Squib update. I'm so excited for the finally chapter! I love it so much. <3


	29. Chapter 29

Sirius’s heart nearly flew out of his chest as he rushed to return to the battle. He ran into Luna yanking her out of the way of falling ruble. She looked at him smiling, “Sirius!”

“Luna! Where’s Harry!? Is the snake dead?” He asked as she pulled him down casting a spell over his shoulder.

“I think Hermione and Ron where after the snake. But I’m not sure if it’s dead or about Harry.” She said as ruble exploded around them.

“Alright! Thanks!” He stood rushing away from her.

He was taking the steps two at a time running down them when he saw a serpentine tail from the corner of his eye. His boots skidded as he changed directions chasing after it. Green light bounced off the snake in front of him as Ron and Hermione tried to kill her. She had strong protection magic on her he thought rummaging in his expanding bag. He would not send Spike at her least she hurt his friend. Finding the potion he wanted he chucked it at her. The sticky orange potion landed around her making Nagini stop her pursuit, she turned hissing at him.

“Not so tough now.” He muttered, he glanced in his bag. What could kill a snake and a horcrux?

“Sirius!” Hermione yelled, he glanced up seeing Nagini yanking herself free of the sticking potion coming straight at him. Not good, not good. He turned going the other way as Nagini followed him. He glanced back at her ramming into Neville sending them to the floor the sword of Gryffindor clattering along with them.

“Sirius are you- Nagini!” Neville growled scrambling to grab the sword above them with Sirius still on top of him. The snake in question coiled back getting ready to strike them.

“Stay down!” Neville yelled as he swung the sword up over his head, arms around Sirius as Nagini struck. The snake and the sword met midair as Neville managed to slice her in half threw her face. She burst into black smoke and blood, as an eerie scream filled the air.

“Damn Neville.” Sirius said, sitting up on him as Neville more or less flopped back relieved. “I could kiss you!”

“I’m flattered but save those for Harry Siri.” He said breathing deeply.

“Harry!” Sirius yelled scrambling off him. “Do you know where he is?”

“Try the courtyard. Excuse me now that I’ve looked death in the face I need to tell Luna I love her.”

Sirius nodded his thanks running that way. He got there in time to see Harry going toe to toe with Voldemort. He wrapped his arms around a column for support unsure what he could do to help. That’s when it happened, they both stopped. He blinked at them seeing the surprise on the Dark Lord’s face and the determination on Harry’s. The elder wand flew through the air and Harry caught it. Then it was over Voldemort just ceased to be, disintegrating on the spot in a silent scream.

Sirius let go of the column cautiously watching as the Dark Lord Voldemort vanished from the world. He looked up seeing Harry frozen, breathing heavy. Sirius swallowed hard approaching him, “H-Harry?”

“Sirius?” He said looking at him. Harry stumbled over exhausted, he wrapped his arms around him. “It’s over. Sirius it’s over!”

“It is, isn’t it.” Sirius said holding him back. They sunk to the ground together in shock, in happiness, in relief, he wasn’t sure. It was over though. Finally, finally over. He felt Harry’s hand at the base of his neck holding him in place tight. “What now?”

“We rebuild.” Harry said softly kissing his cheek.

**********

Two years after the battle of Hogwarts and Sirius was still tired. Severus had stepped down as Headmaster, allowing McGonagall to become Headmistress. Though she had a headmaster portrait commissioned of him against his will. She had insisted Severus become Deputy Headmaster but he was done with Hogwarts. His fathers had instead opened a potions shop, which worked well Remus was the happy face of the shop and Severus leisurely made potions and potions to order.

Sirius still lived with them, not that he expected his parents to kick him out. However Harry did talk of moving in together now that they were older. Harry had actually taken over making Sirius his destunter which still blew Severus’s mind. His boyfriend was head auror but Sirius worked with Hermione in their partnership on a squib branch in the ministry. They created it together, it was wonderful really the Protection Response Organization for the Non-magical Group Squibs, P.R.O.N.G.S. They had worked hard on that dreadfully long name but he just wanted the abbreviation.

He looked at Harry smiling at him across the table, “You seem nervous. Was everything ok at work today?”

“Yeah everything was fine.” Harry said, “Just cleaning up leftover death eater messes… How was your day?”

“Fine.” Sirius said rubbing Spike’s cocooned form. He glanced at him, Harry had taken him to Skarmoy’s where they had their first date. He chuckled at the memory, they had been so painfully awkward.

“What’s so funny?” Harry asked as he paid the bill.

“Just remembering our first date. It was awkward as hell.” He said as Harry laughed.

“Yeah it was. But I think it worked out.” He took Sirius’s hand leading him for a walk of the forest. “If we’re talking first date, shall I make a point to buy you chocolates?”

“Ice cream would be fine.” He said seeing the pensive look on Harry’s face, he pursed his lips looking at him. “What’s wrong with you? You’re acting strange.”

“I guess I was wondering something.” He said rubbing his hand. “How come you never took your dad’s last names?”

“Because I’m Sirius Black. Just because they adopted me doesn’t mean I wanted to give up Reggie’s last name.” He said scrunching his nose confused. “Besides Sirius Lupin-Snape sounds weird anyways.”

“Yeah that doesn’t sound right… What about Sirius Potter?” Harry said pausing his walk. Sirius turned to look at him curiously only to see Harry down on one knee ring box out. “Sirius will you marry me?”

“Harry…” He said in shock, before his brain caught up to him. “Of course I’ll marry you!”

Harry was beaming at him as he slipped the ring on his finger. He stood up capturing Sirius’s lips. “Oh Sirius, you’ve made me the happiest man alive.”

“I can’t wait to tell my parents they’re going to flip.” Sirius said marveling at the ring.

“They already know.” Harry said as Sirius looked up. “I- I asked them for permission, for your hand.”

“Oh Merlin. You poor thing.” Sirius said interlacing their hands.

**********

Sirius looked at the boy in front of him on the hospital bed while his husband read the report silently. A house elf had brought him in, refused to give any names and left just wanting the child healed. He’d already read the medical report, it wasn’t good. Thankfully over the years his dad, Severus, created a way to check for stunting potions in children. He really wasn’t surprised to see that listed along with all the other problems. Hermione had already gone to work making the poor boy a ward of the ministry, since thanks to them, stunting was now considered child abuse and endangerment. He sighed the stunting was bad they couldn’t foster him with muggles like they did some other squibs. It was hard enough to convince wizarding families to adopt or foster a squib, let alone a stunted one.

Sirius looked at him, his blonde hair was matted, eye blackening, lip split and breathing labored. The healer was kindly trying to convince him to take a skelogrow to fix his broken femur. The seven year old covered his mouth with his hands refusing, his’s eyes kept glancing to him and Harry nervously.

“I can take it from here. Thank you.” Sirius said reaching out taking the potion from the healer, she gave him a knowing look before leaving. He and his husband smiled at the silent boy, Sirius showed the potion to him before taking the tiniest sip. The child’s eyes widened seeing this as he then offered it to him. “See, it’s ok. I promise. It tastes yucky but it will make your leg feel much better. My name’s Sirius and this is Harry Potter. What’s your name?”

“Umm… My name?...” He said looking at them. “Am I in trouble?”

“Of course not. It’s just not every day you see a child with such an injury and for them to be dropped off by a house elf.” Harry said softly the boys eyes bee lined to Harry as he took the potion carefully. He stared at the thick mixture before drinking it all, he looked at them curiously. Harry smiled trying to sound reassuring as he spoke, “Good job. Remember it won’t feel good now but you’re in a safe place you’ll feel much better in the morning.”

“Can you tell me your name? Or who the house elf was?” Sirius asked. The kid nodded blonde hair falling into his face as he did.

“… Her name is Muffy, she’s my neighbor’s elf.” He said playing with the sheets not looking up. Sirius waited patiently but it didn’t seem the boy was going to talk easily, he understood that. He gave him a warm smile ready to pull out his favorite ice breaker as the boy fidgeted.

“Would you like to see something cool?” Sirius asked making the kid look at him. Sirius reached up uncurling Spike from his ear. The swooping evil stretched out tired but upon seeing the child made a cooing noise of interest. Blue grey eyes lit up as a small hand reached out delicately. “This is Spike. He’s been my friend for a long time. Would you like to hold him?”

“Yes! Please…” He said. Sirius held out his arm allowing Spike’s large form to crawl down and onto the bed. “You- you must be a strong wizard to have a pet like this.”

“I’m not a wizard.” Sirius said carefully showing him how to pat Spike. “I’m a squib.”

“R-really?” He jerked looking at him alarmed. “But I don’t understand… I thought Harry Potter hated squibs.”

“I don’t hate squibs.” Harry said taking Sirius’s hand. “I married a squib. Sirius is my husband.”

“But father said you hated squibs! He said that- that-” He turned away frustrated hands digging into the blanket. Spike seeing his distress gently nudged his head into his hand, unconsciously the small boy began patting him.

“It’s alright. Hey I think Spike really likes you.” Sirius said gently, the kid looked down smiling at the elderly swooping evil. “Can you tell me your name?”

He glanced at them a long time licking his lips. “My parents call me lots of names. I don’t like any of them… They call me Dirt, Stupid, Squib, Drax, and Useless. Please don’t call me those…”

Sirius pursed his lips, so his name was Drax but he didn’t even recognize it as a name. He heard it lumped in with too many horrible other words to notice it. That was troubling, he made a note on his paper. He would probably be a good candidate for a name change. Lots of squibs took them for having bad attachments or no recognition to their names.

“We won’t call you those, I promise. I’m an auror. Do you know what that is?” Harry asked earning a curt nod. “Ok so you know I help people no matter what. You aren’t in trouble and I will personally promise to keep you safe. Now I need you to tell me how you got hurt. Can you do that?”

He got another nod and the boy leaned forward becoming very interested in Spike. “I was bad. I spilt father’s liquor when pouring it for him. I- I didn’t mean too! I was tired - and it was an accident! He got mad and- and-”

Sirius reached out very slowly taking the panicking boy’s hand he rubbed gentle circles on it. Slowly the blonde calmed down looking at their joined hands. Sirius spoke, “You’re not bad for spilling a drink. He was wrong not you. Understand?”

He could see the confusion on his face and Sirius thanked Merlin for all the times his dads, Regulus and friends had patiently walked him out of a panic attack. The blonde looked at him before nodding, Sirius instructed him to take a deep breath. He did bringing color back to his pale face.

“H-he was really mad. He- punished me but when I didn’t stop crying because of my leg he put me in… the shed- for the night.” He said shuddering at the word ‘shed’. Sirius gave his hand a gentle squeeze grounding the boy, Spike cooed at him softly. “That’s when Muffy came. She had seen him drag me out there and was trying to bring me food. I begged her to help me instead. So she brought me here.”

“Thank you for telling us.” Sirius said softly. “That must have been very scary but you’re safe now.”

The little blonde looked at him pleased before his eyes darkened. “Umm… Once my leg is healed, will you take me back to them?”

Harry leaned forward now, “Listen to me very carefully, you will _never_ be going back to that house. It’s not right mommy’s and daddy’s shouldn’t do that to you. We understand that you’re a squib and that you’re stunted. But that’s ok. My husband and I, we’re going to take care of you.”

Sirius marveled at him, he sounded so much like James and he didn’t even know it. The blonde looked up. “I-I don’t have to go back? I don’t have to ever go back!”

“No. You don’t.” Sirius said, seeing the boy smile for the first time since they came in.

They talked for a while, they learned he was seven but actually fourteen. Picking at details they figured out a last name, Bautista, which had Harry curling his lips pleased. He glanced at him, he knew his husband would probably get his partner Ron and be making a house call to the boy’s family soon. He hoped there would be arrests and they could figure out any potions distributer that was making the stunter.

They stood in the hall of St. Mungo’s each digesting what they had learned. Sirius was mentally flipping through names of possible foster homes but he wasn’t too hopeful the kid would need a lot of work. He also had to get a hold of his dad and see if he could work on a destunter plan for him so he could grow up normally. He sighed glancing at the door to the room. He felt an arm wrap around him, he looked at his husband’s patient smile.

“Sirius about the kid-”

“Harry I’m so worried for him.” He said, reaching up to hold the hand on his shoulder. “He’s stunted with a history of abuse and he doesn’t recognize his own name. He will be so hard to place. It’s clear he’s afraid of potions, you didn’t use magic around him but I’m willing to bet he’s adverse to it. He’s going to need really patient and understanding guardians and- what’s this?”

He took the paper Harry shoved in his face giving it a quick glance over. It was the little blonde’s guardianship form he noted, his eyes drifted down to the signature line where he stopped. He blinked at his husband’s sloppily scrawled name. “Harry, are you serious?”

“No, you are.” Harry said smirking at his own dumb joke.

“Oh shut up.” Sirius said smiling back as Harry handed him a quill. “I love you so much.”

**********

“So this is our home. Or your new home.” Harry said holding the little blonde boy tight walking in. Sirius smiled at the awestruck expression on his face while Harry told him excitedly about his new room and how he’d make it any color he wanted. He nodded along as Harry spoke but Sirius could see that he was more content with Harry holding him since he had locked his hands behind his husband’s neck tightly. Sirius smiled, he remembered realizing that Severus and Remus hold him and he had loved it too.

“They’re home! They’re home! Where’s my new brother!?”

Sirius chuckled as Regulus Severus Potter ran into the room nearly falling on his face in his rush, his accidental magic the only thing keeping him up. The little boy recovered quickly skidding to a halt looking at the small blonde in his dad’s arms. “Oh he’s blonde! And he looks younger then me! I am now a big brother!”

“Reg, you’re already a big brother, to Lily-Lu. Duh.” James Remus Potter said wrapping his knuckles on Regulus’s head. Sirius smiled at his two adopted sons as James continued, “What’s his name?”

“Yes what’s my newest grandson’s name?” Remus said power walking into the room as Severus followed holding their sleeping adopted daughter Lily Luna Potter.

“Well he’s asked for a name change,” Sirius said watching the blonde take in all the new faces. “So his new name is Alastor Neville Potter.”

“Alastor?” Severus said coming to the realization he smiled softly. “Oh Moody… He would have been honored.”

Sirius nodded Alastor ‘Mad-Eye’ Moody the man was helping squibs longer then he had been alive and Sirius could think of no better way to commemorate his life. He chuckled as Harry introduced the family slowly as the small blonde nodded along. Harry looked at him smiling, “This is your new family Alastor.”

“So Alastor, how old are you?” James asked only to get run over by Regulus.

“Move Jamie!” Regulus cried reaching towards Harry excited, “Can I hold him? I want to hold my little brother!”

“He’s too big for that Reg.” Sirius said as Alastor was placed on the ground showing he was only a little smaller then Regulus.

“Umm… I’m actually older then you.” The blonde said quietly.

“What!?” Regulus cried.

“It’s true, he’s seven going on fourteen.” Harry said.

Regulus pouted, crossing his arms, he looked at Alastor disappointed making the blonde fidget uncomfortably. Sirius watched the interaction curiously waiting for his son to break. Finally Regulus opened his arms wide, Alastor flinched but Regulus picked him up smiling. “Ha! I can still pick him up! And he’s older then you James, you’re a little brother now too!”

“I don’t care Reg. Now put him down, I want to see him.” James said hiding a smile as Regulus rolled his eyes relenting. James leaned down looking at Alastor, he reached out touching his hair curious. The second he did James hair morphed from brown to blonde and Alastor’s from blonde to brown. Alastor stepped back alarmed the tiniest bit of panic crossing his face.

“Oh dear, it’s alright just a little accidental magic.” Remus laughed as he shared a look with Severus smiling at the boys making Alastor relax.

“Harry can you?” Sirius said gesturing at their hair, as James tried to cover his head embarrassed. Harry laughed fixing his both of his son’s hair. Sirius wrapped an arm around the blonde’s shoulder comfortingly. “No harm, Alastor. You’re alright see.”

“Yeah… H-how old are you?” Alastor asked eyeing the two boys.

“We’re the same age! I’m seven!” Regulus yelled practically getting in his face excited.

Remus took pity on Alastor’s nervous look scooping Regulus up from behind. “Come on Regulus, let’s go get the cookies you and Grandad made for this special occasion.”

“Yeah I made you cookies!” Regulus yelled pointing triumphantly while getting carried to the kitchen as Lily-Lu woke up from the commotion.

“I’m sorry about him.” James said eyes rolling, “He’s insane.”

“James!” Harry scolded softly as Sirius and Severus laughed.

“I’m nine by the way.” James said ignoring them, “And Lily-Lu is five. So you’re a stunted squib like dad?”

“Another squib! Grandad put me down!” Lily-Lu cried leaning in her grandfather’s arms to look at the timid blonde. Severus obliged putting her on the ground, she walked up to Alastor throwing her arms around him. He looked at Harry and Sirius tensely, they tried to smile reassuringly at him. Lily-Lu pulled back, “I’m so happy, with you here it’s even three wizards and three squibs!”

“Umm… Thanks.” Alastor said confused as the adults laughed.

Sirius smiled at his kids, all four of them as Regulus came back in like a tornado holding a large plate of cookies. Sirius glanced at his dads as Lily-Lu introduced them as grandad and grandpa respectively. He then chuckled watching Harry lunge to keep Regulus’s accidental magic from making the seven year old float as James grabbed the tray from him. Through all this Alastor looked nervous but really excited.

He glanced at Sirius and Harry fidgeting with some blonde hair. Sirius picked up their new overwhelmed child as Harry came over holding Regulus on his hip. Harry leaned in looking at the blonde happily, “Welcome to the family son.”

Sirius smiled at Harry’s pointed use of son and the cute smile on Alastor’s face at the acceptance. He looked down as the boy in his arms spoke, “Wh-what should I call you?”

“Call us whatever makes you happy.” Sirius said as Regulus scoffed from Harry’s arms.

“This is papa,” Regulus patting Harry, he then pointed at Sirius. “And he’s dad.”

“Umm- alright. T-thanks, dads.” Alastor said looking over at them smiling shyly.

Sirius smiled at him his heart melting, he loved his kids all of them. He glanced up at his father’s both trying to coo over their new grandson Alastor while he watched them wide eyed. James was trying to help Lily-Lu pick the best cookie from the plate. Regulus dictating from Harry’s arms which cookie he wanted and what ones where strictly for his new brother. Spike even uncurled laying on his back purring at them all happily. And finally Harry. He looked at him, they shared a smile. He couldn’t help it he leaned in kissing Harry so happy with his family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's over. I'm sad and happy at the same time. Sirius Squib was a wonderful and fun story to write.   
> According to MSWord this was a 296page story. lol I keep saying I should write shorter things but then I get so into it. I'm working on new stuff so keep an eye out for me again if you like my stuff.   
> I'd like to thank anyone who read till the end and to anyone who wrote comments. :)

**Author's Note:**

> I feel like this is a strange topic, but hey it's kinda fun. Also Regulus Black is super under rated. Please let me know what you think. :)


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